TTC # 1 irregular cycle currently on 7DPO

[Tanzibar83]

Hey Non, I'm doing well thanks.

I bet your super excited about the holiday I know I would be. So I take it from your post that Joe hasn't been before? I bet it's fun giving him "the tour" - lets hope they haven't rebuilt loads of it and changed lots

I'm not sure whats happening with my cycle, I'm a little disheartened by my OPK's, they are showing very faint lines but they just don't seem to be getting darker so I'm now thinking I'm nowhere near ovulation (so much for the stupid soy).

Oh I'm so glad you haven't been symptom spotting, if Joe knew you were on here telling me about your sore boobs he wouldn't be pleased...I'm glad I can vouch for you and confirm you haven't been doing that (if he ever came snooping)

It would be so great for you if you ovulate on holiday, like I said before you're more relaxed and will have more chance on conceiving in that frame of mind. I hope to ovulate soon but I'm just not feeling it. Oddly though I still feel this will be my cycle. When we've been dtd I've been sticking my legs up and over me and my feet are near my face and I won't rest again until I feel dry down below. I get a sore back but the gravitational pull will force the swimmers through the cervix and to the golden egg!

We've been using preseed the past couple of times too

I had a mad urge to deep clean last night, I must have started about 8pm and didn't stop til near midnight, I can now safely say the front room is now dust free and I've finally sorted out the speakers so now it doesn't sound like all audio is coming out of one speaker.

I still need to hover but after spending time with MIL I feel I need to start being a bit more regimented and prepared for lots of things. Hell if I want to raise a child I'll need to realise basic stuff like hovering should be done whether or not I can be bothered to do it (lets face it, it only takes 10 minutes max to do right?).

Bank holiday was good, my team got james completely wasted Ive never seen him like it before, he wasn't even slurring his words, it had gone one stage further...he was slowing down his speech! He was so bad he was sick on the way home, sick in the night and when he woke up too. my team mates will be getting an earful off me tomorrow, hehe.

I'll find out my results from my appeal tomorrow too, I'll let you know how that goes

I've got a wedding on Saturday so I'm working longer hours this week so I can finish earlier on Friday (I can't be bothered booking half a day off).

so you said 2 weeks bar one day off, whats that all about?

It was nice spending time with MIL and her fiance (but he's into footie so when he came home from work he hogged the tv to watch the barcelona vs man u game). my MIL was saying it took her and James father only 1 month before she fell pregnant, lucky for some eh? She's well keen to be a grandma, there's a polish girl at her work who's pregnant and my MIL hosted a baby shower party (she's mothering her as her family are over in Poland) - I keep thinking "aww, how lovely, she'll be an ace grandma".

ooo a picnic sounds good, I may have to arrange one when the weathers nice. Today we went to the National Media Museum in Bradford, it was really great and informative. I was intruiged by the first camera's ever made and all the old TV sets. They even had BBC Leeds in the building too, I was tempted to go give them my CV!

I don't know if I'm taking after my mother but I just don't seem that any job I have will be long term so I've started thinking more about my writing and keen-ness to make it in the industry so I've applied for some jobs at the North West BBC (At Salford Quays). A part of me feels really horrible for my current team as it just looks like I'm taking the mick but writing and being creative is what I want to do so if anything ever came up I'd probably take it.

I was thinking the other day about when I have kids and the influence I'll be on them and I'm really wanting them to love the arts. I'd be so proud if they become very passionate about being creative I would back them all the way (James would defo do the same). I think as long as I can encourage my kids to change the world via creative work I'll be a happy bunny. I know that sounds far fetched but I don't want my kids thinking they have to follow suit and only take x,y, and z jobs when they can create a,b,c jobs for others to follow.

If you don't get chance to respond on bnb I'll post you a "have a good holiday" message on FB before the end of the week

 

[MummyP2b]

What were the results of your appeal? I'm really intrigued to know! All good I hope!

I get what you're saying about making that influence on your kids. I hope I can influence them to do something amazing with out being pushy! (My mum and her side of the family is very pushy and I HATE it!!) So I want to be the loving, supportive, caring, best friend type mum that doesn't become the nagging, pushy type!!

I would love my kids to have an interest in music! I hate saying it but I can sing, I love music so for my kids to have an interest in singing or music or instruments (like piano, violin, drums, guitar type thing) would be awesome.

Good luck with those job applications you applied for!

To be honest I think I'm very much like you and your mum, I get fidgety feet in jobs quite quick. Also with houses, but only cos we moved so much so it's almost second nature.

I have 2 weeks off from my mon, tues and wed job (which I class as my main job) I was able to take the first thursday off but not the second so I have 2 weeks off apart from the 2nd week when I have to work the thursday (booo)

Are you watching Britain's Got Talent? I'm trying to write this message and keep getting distracted!!

Hope you had good news from your appeal today!

 

[Tanzibar83]

Hey well I was in an out of meetings all day and was gearing myself up for my main appeal one at 4.30 when I refreshed my mailbox and the organiser had cancelled it today So I was a bit bummed out and went to speak to the interviewer who said she only postponed cause she was called into an emergency meeting and not to worry. So I hope his comforting words were a subtle hint to me. I don't know when I'll find out but I'll let you know asap.

It was actually really weird at the weekend when James came back from the stag do, the morning after he said there were rumours that my old colleague in security had been fired or she quit BUT he told me this then said he wasn't sure if he dreamt it or not. So today I was subtely dropping hints and my colleague confirmed she had walked out of the job!!

I was so happy cause she was one of 2 people who made my life hell in the security role, I really hope she only left cause she was close to being fired! So thats put a spring in my step I can assure you!

Musical kids would be great too, although I hope they don't take an interest in playing drums otherwise I'd have to invest in ear plugs.

I think we both must just want to be ladies of leisure don't we? I like to be occupied but I don't know what job I could for the next 40 years where I'll be happy (possibly a chocolate tester at cadburys maybe)

Shame you have to work that Thursday, but that's ages off yet anyway so I'd put it to the back of your mind for now.

no I'm not watching BGT, is it the final tonight? I saw some clips throughout the series and have seem some real crackers - who are you rooting for to win?

Cause I have a wedding on Saturday and need to drive up to Penrith on the Friday I'm working more hours during the week so I can finish early on Friday so today has just dragged. I started at 8 and finished about 5.10 - I chose not to have a dinner so I've worked about 9 hours, I'm mega tired now. It doesn't help that I've also been on EA sports on the wii mind you, I'm even sleepier now.

I think my OPK today was darker than normal but it's not super super dark, it's a tad dark on the right hand side but then just goes faint, it doesn't look like I'm even close to ov'ing any day soon. I'm just hoping maybe my body is crap for picking up my lh surge on OPK's.

Have you been feeling hopeful about TTC today?

 

[MummyP2b]

Morning, though I'd reply now might as well as the kiddies are eating breakfast and watching cbeebies. So it's quiet at the mo!! I love Wednesdays!!! Nearly the end of the week for me and nearly my holiday time! You're going to get so sick of hearing about my holiday!! I am so excited!! Joe got the suitcases down yesterday from the loft and that was such an exciting thing to see!!!

That is SUCH a bummer about your appeal!! I hope it was a good enough emergency! And I hope they don't drag the wait out too long for you! I hate waiting!! I'm quite impatient, I take after my dad. If I think of something I want or somethig I want to do then I almost feel like I want it NOW! I am not or was never spoilt, not now or as a child, so I don't really know how I haven't really got that into my head that somethings I can't have now and somethings I need to wait for!!

This reflects on my TTC! I want it to work NOW!! I've had enough of all the waiting and heartache every month! Haven't you?

Joe gets very much like that when he's drunk, sick and past point of slurring!! It's really funny but almost quite worrying!! There was one time when we went to a house party my friend was holding back when me and Joe had only been going out a couple of months!!! He took his own drink.... Mixture.... Thing. He filled a litre bottle with all the different spirits he had at home. And had about half of the bottle. Needless to say he was 'out of it'. His mum and dad were away at the time so I decidedto take him back to his house and just keep an eye on him.

When we got back to his parents house, I went to the toilet to come
Back into his room to find he was hiding behind the curtains being sick out of the top window!!! I was really worried about him. I asked him where a bucket was incase he needed to be sick through the night. In the morning he asked me where I got the bucket from and told him that he told me where to get it from. He was really confused cos he hadn't actually got a clue where it would have been kept!!!

So point of my story is that somehow when we are so drunk we are able to access a part of our brain that we wouldn't be able to sober!! Font really know how that works out!! Have you seen the film limitless?? It's a bit like that if you have!

Any way tangent over!!

We have been doing very well with TTC. Every other night at least, if not every day/night!! We haven't done it since Sunday night so I'm hoping I haven't missed it!! I don't have a clue really when I ovulated so we have just been doin it whenever. I thought I ov'd on day 7 or 8, but I started having more cm a few days ago. Then yesterday I was completely dry but then this morning I've wiped and the tissue was almost full of cm!! (sorry tmi) it was creamy. Dint really know what's going on!!

Last night I had a really lovely dream that felt SO real!!
I was pregnant and went swimming with friends. My mum kept saying I shouldn't be in the pool and doingtoo much exercise and splashing around in case I mc. I thought j was only about 10 weeks but when I had got out of the pool my friends we pointing out that my tummy was moving, so I looked down to see that my baby was kicking!! Joe suddenly appeared and felt. He then cried. I don't remember much happening after that but I woke up remembering I wasn't actually pregnant!! That's so disheartening isn't it??!!

Im not too sure how our TTC is going this month!! I don't feel like I'm going to have my BFP but then I sometimes find myself thinking "well why shouldn't it work?!"

I don't even know when I'm due on. I just hope its not on holiday!! I hate being on my period whilst on holiday. I think irma is due when we get back (I think). Maybe I need to work it out!!

I have a good feeling for you this month!!! I have all my fingers and toes crossed for you!!

BGT it's just the semi finals at the mo. It's alright. They've got some good ones! I'm not too sure who I want to win at the mo. I like the pianist, I like ronan (the young lad singer) I also like the young boy group. So 3 out of the 4 finalists so far.... Not bad hey!!!

Ladies of leisure!!! I would love to be one of those!! When Joe has a well paid job he has actually said he'd think it'll be nice if I stayed at home and looked after the kiddies and spent quality time with them and taught them what we want them to learn. So I guess lady of leisure is on the cards sometime in my life!! (I hope) yay!!!

Who's wedding are you going to? Is it the same people that had the stag do??

It's suppose to be a scorcher this weekend end!! Hopefully it's nice for the wedding for you I am happy it's warming up, it's about time but I kinda don't want to to warm up cps we are going on holiday and paying for all that sun!!! But I guess if we weren't goig on holiday it'd be miserable no doubt!! Just our luck!!

Hope you have a good day

 

[Tanzibar83]

Oooo not long til Lanzaholiday! Hope you have your passport ready

I still haven't heard about the appeal re-schedule, I've emailed HR asking if it can be done quick as I don't want to wait around any longer.

I got a dark opk last night, it's not as dark as the control line but I think I must ovulate soon (I better had!).

ooo mixes at house parties always seem like a great idea but then the next morning your brain says "why did you do knowingly do that to yourself?". hehe.

I really find it bizarre how people don't remember doing things when drunk, I usually need a little prompting but can usually recall most of it - how about you? No I've not seen limitless, it's on the to watch list though. We're onto season 10 of smallville so it's all tying up nicely at the minute. Teri hatcher has made a cameo (I love it when they do stuff like that).

Have you been taking your OPK's yet?

That was one weird dream you had the other night, is Joe a cryer? it's amazing how the littlest of things can do that to a man!

BGT - is the impresionist still in it? I thought his Kevin Webster was fantastic, I laughed my head off when I watched him.

My MIL said there's a job going at her work which would be right up James street so I'm pestering him to sort his CV out, it's in Manchester but if he works there it would probably mean we'll move there when looking for a house.

The wedding on Saturday is James' best man (different guy to the stag do last week). It will be one quick weekend then back to work so I don't plan to drink too much, especially with TTC and all that jazz too. Mind you Ive started drinking Blosssom Hill Rose, If thats there I'll defo be drinking that.

I think we'll go buy our own booze too, wedding booze is always expensive don't you think?

Are you all packed up for Saturday? What time are you going?

 

[Tanzibar83]

Hey Non,

Just read on Fb you're back, hope you had a great time. What was the weather like? did you do enough b'ding? what was the highlight of the holiday?

I got the results back from my appeal...unfortunately it's not changing so I've been marked down as a 4 for last year. I'm upset and annoyed by it but my line manager has been very supportive and I don't think he sees that as a bad thing considering the way my old team ran through things (like processes) - he can't stand the team actually! I was told by his LM that because of the severity of the case there's a full blown investigation into the way security runs a lot of things so I'm glad thats happening (I think my LM is happy with that).

Not much new is with me, tomorrow is cd42 and this time last cycle i ovulated so we've been doing it like crazy, using preseed and after James has "finished" I'll stick my legs right over my head for about 10 minutes so it gives the swimmers a very good chance of lurking around that little bit longer.

What cd are you on? have you taken any of the opk's yet? mine just aren't getting dark dark at all, they all seem to be staying lighter than the control line

The wedding last weekend was really nice, it wasn't that sunny but it didn't rain and the weather was still nice so there's lot of outdoor pictures which look very lovely.

Are you going to be putting any holiday snaps on fb? I can't believe you're back already, for some reason I thought you were going for 2 weeks!

xx

 

[MummyP2b]

Hey Tan,
How are you? Feels like ages ago since I came on here last! Apart from talking to you on here it's been quite nice to take a break!

What's new?

I am now late (I think) I'm cd 31 and nothing. I'm having some harsh cramps some dull some sharp. I have this feeling in my lower tummy in the centre (uterus area) like twinges and sharp pains etc. Just every now and again. It's almost just like that 'feeling' I had the last time...

I took a test yesterday and it was a BIG FAT NEGATIVE wasn't even a glimpse of anything. Might test tomorrow morning and hope that things change.
I can't do any more.... the disappointment is just getting too much to handle each time. I really want to get some opk's for next month but I just can't be bothered to get right into it and then be let down again.

How are you getting on with your dark lines (which by the way is great news!)

Lanzarote was fab! the photos are up on facebook if you havent seen them already. The weather was ok. wed, thurs and fri up until about 3 ish it was really cloudy but we were still able to sit out on the sunbeds by the pool. but monday, tuesday, saturday and sunday were gorgeous!

Sunday (the day we flew back home) our flight wasn't until 19:40 and the bus wasn't picking us up til 5pm so we decided to go to Teguise Market, which only took us up until 1pm. So we had nothing to do for 4 hours!! We had checked out, suitcases packed and everything so it wasn't as if we could get the swim stuff back out and sunbath for a bit longer! We just sat and read and played cards and did nothing. It was a bit boring really. I would have sat by the pool any way but I was wearing a top with funny straps on so I was worried that I might ruin my good work and then gain strap lines.

We didn't do anything apart from sitting/Lying by the pool! It was lush! I read 4 books!!!!! I only took 2 books, Luckily there was a hotel book shelf so I was able to take some more books! Phew!

Your new profile pic is so lovely! Is that at the wedding at the weekend?

Pooey about your appeal! That sucks big time!! At least it is over now for you! At least your Line manager is being supportive about it! And sees you as the good worker you are!

Hope you are ok
xx

 

[Tanzibar83]

Hey,

My internet went boobies up yesterday (which was typical cause I needed to work from home from 2pm) so hence why I've just posted today! My first car, Peugeot 106 got scrapped yesterday, it was a sad event but we got £150 for it which isn't too bad.

I've just looked through your pics and you both look nice and chilled (and also very brown)! Did you bring back souvenirs? my sister tends to bring fridge magents whenever she does away.

Any updates with a BFP today? I wonder if you're preggers but it's too early to confirm!? I'm keeping my fingers crossed.

I don't know whats happening with my cycle, I've not had any dark opk's, not even remotely close to what I've seen on the internet. I'm just thinking that my body just doesn't produce a strong enough chemical (I forget which). The weird thing is though if you click on my ff link and look at my temps for the past 2 months you'll see how freakishly close they are to one another!

lounging around the pool sounds like a great way to spend a week, was there any decent entertainment in the evenings like kareoke?

My profile pic is from the wedding yes, I plan to upload some more on fb but only after the bride and groom come back (They are due back on monday and on saturday I want to get some print offs and leave them in their flat for when they return)

It's been a bit of a weird day today, my regional boss phoned me up and said (which I expected) that I won't be getting a pay rise this July cause of my appeal rating but he did say to just continue what I'm doing and I will be alright for next year. Which is hopeful but I just hate the fact I could have got something and now I have to hope my team doesn't ask if I got an increase. But money can be a touchy subject so I hope none of the men want to talk about it.

So have you been working today? I bet it feels weird being back in the boring routine instead of sitting by the pool!xx

 

[MummyP2b]

Hiya,
It is sad about cars being scrapped. When my old Rover 214 broke down for the 100th time, I decided enough was enough and that we would get a new car (the peugeot 307)
I got £40 for it when it got taken for scraps! But it was quite sad actually cos there were alot of memories made with that car.

I thought I came back with a good tan but I wish it was better, I wish we were there longer! This UK weather is shit!! We didn't bring any souvenirs back with us. We spent all our money on cocktails and a couple of meals out! yum yum! The only thing I bought back for myself was a little bracelet charm to go on the love links bracelet (do you know the one I mean) But it's not any ordinary charm, it's actually a piece of the Lanzarote lava rock made into a charm!! It's very cool!

Yesterday (cos the weather was nice) we went to the garden centre and bought some stuff for the garden, veggie seeds (I know it's a bit late but it's worth a try) and we bought some stones to go at the back of the garden to make it look pretty. We are going to put the veggies down the side. We were going to do this today but it's been light showers all day. I think tomorrow and friday aren't looking good either so it means our week is going to be wasted cos we aren't going to get much outdoorsy stuff done.

So another negative this morning. Not even a glimpse of a line. I noticed that the strips are 10 mIU/ml.... I know that that is the amount of hormone in the urine that it picks up on the test but I don't know whether that is low to pick up or not. I'm hoping that I'm pregnant (obviously) and just havent built up enough hormone yet.

Joe and I havent done it for a little while. (3rd day of our holiday to be precise) which was the 8th, but tonight we watched a film and after, just one thing led to another on the sofa and before we knew it.... well..... you know....

I had said to him a few days ago that I dont really want to have sex cos the last time we had sex and I was due my period I started bleeding the next day, It was almost as though something was unplugged!! So I didn't want that to be the case this time.

Well after he came out he noticed a bit of blood on his member (that had come from me) and then when I had cleaned my "mess" up there was a few very small spot of blood on the tissue.... I really hope that I havent been "unplugged" and AF will show next.

I apologise for the TMI there! Didn't mean to gross you out in any way!!

So I think the next tim eI will text will be on friday if I haven't started by then (or maybe tomorrow) I don't know what to do!!

That really sucks about not getting your pay rise!! boo to your old job for putting your rating down like that!! It's nice you have such an understanding team now though that seem to be supporting you through it and know you are 'worth' better than what your old line manager makes out!

How is James finding it with you not being there any more?

Your temps do seem very stable!! Real shame about your non existent dark opk lines. I hope they show!! They should show very soon shouldn't they if your longest cycles lasted 55 days didn't it? Just keep bding... (which I know can get a little tiresome)

It really will be worth it in the end, but I hope the 'end' is VERY soon (the end being both pregnant with babies)

I'm not back at work until monday which is NICE but I'm starting to feel down about going back already! I know I shouldn't and I'm just working myself up but I am really enjoying the time off work!!

OH! I know this a bit random but I'll tell you anyway. I don't know whether we have spoke about this before. Joe never let s me cut his hair. He always gets his mum to do it. A while back we both went to her house for yet another hair cut for Joe and she let me have a go!!! woo!! So anyway, yesterday we went to drop his mum's birthday present to her and he ask her for the hair clippers etc... I was a bit puzzled thinking he was going to do it on his own or something not thinking for one minute he was going to turn and say "no, maybe you could try and do my hair for me" (talking to me) :O Shock horror!!

So he is FINALLY going to trust me with the clippers and I really really hope I don't screw it up!!

 

[Tanzibar83]

Blimey you only got £40 I bet they'd easily make way more from your Rover!

I'm not familiar with the Love Links bracelet, is it like Pandora (if you know what I mean? hehe)

You should put some pics on fb of your charm, on my honeymoon to Iceland I bought a necklace which had icelandic volcanic rock as the pendant (it's really nice and I can imagine yours is too).

I've seen your pots on FB, did you get those for your wedding or have I read someones comments wrong? either way they look lovely and from what I can see in the background you've done a good job on the garden too.

keep on trying with the hpts, how many more have you got? I've got about 6 more opk's before I run out (I started with 80 and have only used them properly for 1 cycle!) - I found some digital tests in my draw which will come in handy if\when I need a bfp confirming. I don't want to junix it and start buying more opk's just on the off chance I am preggers.

shame about the nearly perfect b'ding last night, I hope AF hasn't shown for you today. I remember when we first started TTC and I was thinking about cutting down on the sex just incase it unplugs AF. It's weird the way the human brains works and panics you like that isn't it? I just wish it was more useful and could send bfp signals, it would certainly save on pennies.

At first when I moved jobs James was gutted, he didn't have anyone to go get some lunch with, he's found a new friend now though (it took him less than half a day ((it was his colleague who sits next to him - haha)). I feel like I've been there for donkeys when it reality it's been just over 4 months. I've started getting into a new routine with my workload aswell, I've finally come to the realisation that I should always expect new work daily and will always have tonnes of work. I don't mind, it's just taking me ages to realise thats how its gonna be on the team

I've been sat in the office with just one other team member today, everyone else was either off on holiday, working from home or down in Derby doing some training. It's been very quiet and must admit my day dragged but I got a lot of work done. I've been talking to my line manager recently and we've been moaning about the way the higher up's in the company don't have a clue on how to runor do things - it's nice to actually have a "whinging" conversation to someone without thinking "should I have said that to management" but he's of the same opinion so that's always a bonus!

I'm not dissing my job but I bet you (and Joe especially) know that the longer you stay with a company the more crap comes out of the woodworks.

The freaky temp thing has continued to today, if tomorrow it goes to 36.60 then I might start thinking I'm just suffering a severe case of Ground hog day. Do you think you'll start temping again?

Your "end is very soon" quote made me laugh, I instantly jumped to that famous quote "the end is nigh" - it better had be!

Ah cutting mens hair! I can't remember if we have talked about it but I find it's one of those things where I instatly regret saying yes to. Have you actually cut his hair, if so how did you find doing it? James is very very very (I could go on) picky and tells me how to hold hair and the angle of the scissors, grr I don't half get wound up (Maybe I should invest in some clippers). You 'll have to let me know how it went (or goes - depending when you do it).

Have you done any more job hunting or will you stay put for now?

 

[MummyP2b]

I have just wrote this super long message on here and was STUPIDLY experimenting how to get the euro symbol up and my whole message wiped out!!!!
I am so upset!! I really can't be bothered to type it out again!!!
I will write later on.

Today I am in a real downer mood! I keep crying (for no reason for silly things)
Still no period and still negatives tests. I wish something would happen. I actually wish AF would turn up!!

I don't feel it's ever going to be my turn at being a mummy I don't know what to do!

I was going to cutting Joe's hair once I had typed the message to you. He is still looking at 'how to cut mens hair' on you tube.... lack of trust maybe??
I sure do hope I get it right!

I will attach 2 pictures.
first one is of the pots we used at the wedding. It'll be pretty explanitory what they were for. It was a beach theme so every table had a name representing what you see or do down at the beach
And the second is a picture I found on google similar to the lava rock charm I bought for 3.50 (euros) (this is where I deleted the message!!!!! It was so far down the post)
I only have one of these charms.

Will chat on fb or write something later, hopefully I'l snap out of my mood I'm in!

Hope you're ok?
xx

 

[Tanzibar83]

Oh I understand the frustration at those epic responses where a single button or click just wipes it. Don't worry about it!

sorry to hear you're feeling down, I'm sure something will happen over the next few days for you (even if that does mean jinxing it and getting down to "business"). It would be so awesome though if we both get bfp's at the same time or our cycles synch once again.

You should try and distract yourself which is easier said than done but remember if you've been pregnant once before you can and WILL be again, it's just mother nature being an idiot, if only she'd give us all heads up of when that will be!

How are you getting on with the Sophie Kinsella books? Must admit I've not read much of mine since we last talked about it (mainly cause I've been playing the keyboard).

hows your SIL getting on with her pregnancy? just think that when you announce your pregnant you'll eclipse hers and that will seem old news compared to what you and joe have to got to celebrate (I didn't mean that in a nasty way by the way, just more of "the mandatory waiting and stress will pay off" way ).

I love your table decorations thats really inventive, the shells look so lovely too.

The charm looks like something you could treasure forever, you said it didn't cost much but I bet it will hold a lot of good memories for you.

To be on the safe side with catching the egg this cycle we've been bonking like rabbits since saturday, making sure it's at least twice a day (one in the morning, one in the evening - my you know what is so tired though).


keep smiling and thinking positive

 

[Tanzibar83]

DAMN DAMN DAMN DAMN mother nature. My friend who I said TTC no 2 the same time I started TTC no 1 has had a baby boy! I'm not sure when but I took a sneak at her FB and people are congratulating her...now I feel depressed (it should have been me).

I'm happy for her but I just can't pick up the will to go and talk to her (that makes me a really bad person I know, but I feel so annoyed by it).

That's it, by hook or by crook I will be pregnant come xmas time!

 

[MummyP2b]

I know how you feel! You're not a bad person, I'm sure your friend will understand whenthe time is right for you to go and chat to her! Even though she has never been through what you have, she won't fully understand how you feel, the heart ache we go through each month but I'm sure once you explain it to her she'd understand

Congrats to her though

My SIL's pregnancy is going well. I haven't really spoke to her very much since we have been back but from what I'm gathering she is doing well. She is 28 weeks now. She uploads pics each week to this other group she invited me into (back when I was pregnant) She is growing such a canny bump!! I'm very jealous!

We both really wanted to be pregnant at the same time so we can share our journey together but now she is in her third trimester and I dont think Ive even started yet!

I guess it'll be nice for her to have all the attention whilst she is pregnant and then I can have all the excitement for my pregnancy but we can over lap!

Wowza! twice a day!!! Are you not tired? I get tired with just once a day!!

Joe said tonight that if I'm not pregnant this month and it means trying again, he doesnt really want to pay out for opks etc. I would like to and go all out but don't want to get my head stuck into it all! ok that was a bit of a tangent but anyway back on track. Joe had said what would be the difference in getting opks and just having sex on the days when it says we have more of a chance (when I'm oving) OR we just have sex every day for the month!!

The thing is after a while I get tired of it and just hope I've ov'd! Tends to be my excuse for us to stop! naughty non!!

How is it doing it 2ce a day??

I read Shoperholic ties the knot by sophie Kinsella, I finished when we go to Lanzarote, I then read 'A sister's gift' by Giselle Green It was really good. It was about a women called Hollie who wanted kids but can't get pregnant so she asks he sister to become her surrogate mum. It's about the ups and downs they go through but It's nice.
So I had ran out of books by the 3rd day!! Luckily the hotel had a book shelf and I found another Sophie Kinsella book, but she goes by 2 names (2 different styles of writing) This was called Cocktails for three. This was also very good. and then I had finished that book when we were waiting for our transfer so I had a quick look for some other book I could read on their book shelf. I'm now reading 'I remember, Daddy' By Katie somebody. Sad book about how she abused when she was a child!

You're playing the keyboard? Are you learning or are you just playing for fun?
I tried to learn at one point but got distracted from it or I think I then went to uni.
I always wanted to learn how to play tho!
x

 

[Tanzibar83]

You know you said about buying OPK's well I have started saving my valued opinions money and plan to buy more baby making stuff like that with that dosh, so in effect it's cost me 0 pence to buy. Maybe if you get the itch to buy some start doing some online surveys.

www.valuedopinions.co.uk

Glad to hear your SIL is doing well, just think though at this rate when we get BFP's it'll mean we'll be pregnant over the xmas period and that would just be so lovely don't you think?

You're churning through books, I wish I could do that, I try but fail miserably!

I got a keyboard in January and played it for a bit then stopped and have only just started getting back into it. I used to play the piano when I was younger so I'm doing it for both re-learning and fun really. I'd love to master flight of the bumblebee by christmas (that's probably not going to happen though, haha). I bought a disney book and can play "when you wish upon a star" "someday my prince will come" "beauty and the beast" and other songs too quite well (only with my right hand so far). I need to re-train my left hand but I'll soon be in the swing of things.

I find it theraputic to do and can just spend hours on it in the evening. Infact I end up going in the bedroom while James plays on the ps3 and will just stay in there for the rest of the night.

I'm forever trying to find tunes that I love like Home Alone "somewhere in my memory" and the jurassic park theme on google and just learn them - Theres literally hundreds of songs I want to learn but when I come to search my mind goes blank! Oh I learnt "somewhere over the rainbow" the other day, thats such a sweet song and reminds me of the wedding (it was our first day, the eva cassidy one).

Ive started picking up tunes aswell without having music sheets which James is freaked out by. I sat there and played the chorus to Lady Gaga's bad romance a few months ago, then either start of this week or last week I just randomly started playing the simpsons theme tune. I swear when I have kids they will be such creative children I hope they'll change the world or do something very creative wth their lives

I'm going to town today for the first time in weeks, I'm going to print off some pictures from my friends wedding the other week and I think I need new work trousers, I've been wearing black jeans cause my other trousers make my legs looks chunky (bad food, bad!) - so will probably go invest in some cheapy ones until I can my weight back down again. What are you up to?

FF has removed my cross hairs today (boo) but I'm not worried tomorrow they'll come back up, I sound so optimistic I know!

Yesterday was a strange day, 3dpo, James came home for his dinner when I was working from home so he made me cheese and toast stayed for a bit then went back and he must have been gone 5 minutes and a horrible feeling of nausea hit me so hard I starting gagging and had to run to the bathroom cause I thought I was going to heave. I started spitting but never actually threw up but it was so strange cause my mind went into baby mode and went "implantation perhaps". I'm so glad I work from home on Fridays! I'm not sure if it was but we went to watch Green Lantern last night, have you seen it? anywho I just couldn't get comfortable and felt really tired and just had that feeling of not being right. My nose was really sensitive to smell yesterday too, I hope these are all good signs.

Wow, I really didn't mean to write that much but my fingers just carried away!

hope you are both well!

 

[Tanzibar83]

Hey, well well well the tables have really turned with my old job and that team.

In our company we have contracts set up between the client and company which has all these service level agreements in(an example would be "we need 90% first call fix rate with all helpdesk tickets, anything below and you've failed" (the managers do anything and everything they can to make sure they suceed) (theres tonnes but failing even one means we could lose the contract with the client). Anyway for the past few days James has been saying his team (someone on it is the manager for a huge section of the SLA's) have realised that the offshore department is close to failing SLA, the reason being that there's only 3 people on the team and an additional 4 people need to start doing their allocated work.

BUT....

The work they need to do requires my old team to approve some account requests. I told you a few weeks ago that the girl who gave me grief walked out of the job. Well she was the main person who could approve these accounts but with walking obviously they couldn't train anyone else. BUT that meant the only person who's left out of my old team now was this one lad.

WELL....he only went and started a new job on monday on a different account and in a different location but they were able to replace the female with someone else before he left so he must have shown her some of the processes...

So yesterday I get a call from a service level manager (who works with James) and he starts asking me if I can approve the accounts he was that desperate but I told them no cause I don't have access and I'd need for someone to pay for me aswell as approval from my current management. I tell this to my regional boss who starts saying after the grief I received when I left security why on earth should I do them any favours. but at the time all they wanted was for someone to show the new woman the process for that approval and I sent out a quick email thinking nothing more from it.

(sorry if I've confused the hell out of you, I understand if you don't want to read on).

Today I went to get some petrol on a quick break, came back and heard the regional boss talking to this really high up service manager and it sounded as though he was forcing me to do the work (my regional boss was throwing all sorts at this guy saying I received a really bad rating from an appraisal process which was so bad he'd never seen anything like it in his 15+ years at the company) - but he said if I can access the systems then I'll do it.

So I could access it and saw the tickets which needed approving BUT to my horror I saw that the new security girl (the only girl who technically should approve anything in this security queue it was sat in) had logged her own account request to that queue! So I sat there thinking jesus christ, she needs access to that queue but no one apart from herself can approve it...but it's a security breach if she tried so she can't!!!! So I sorted that out but I made it quite clear to these service manager guys that security had gone and done that...I mean who on earth is dumb enough to do that?

So most of that is sorted now and the helpdesk are really thankful I've come to the rescue as are security, although I've had no thanks from my old line manager (I don't think I'll get it). my regional boss was pushing everyone so much about it that the helpdesk have said they'll be putting me in for a bronze award cause I'm helping them out and if it all goes through I'll get £250 for the help today! not bad for 4 hours work

The best scenario ever has happened after I left security (I only wish they'd have the power and decency to change my rating score, but I don't think that'll happen). I honestly haven't felt as needed or useful in security until today and I left it 4 months ago and was there for 15 months. My current LM isn't happy either, he said they're taking the piss so I'm so pleased this is all happening.

I have felt quite smug if truth be told for most of the day, I've got security on their knees, asking for my help knowing full well I could easily turn around and say piss off is just an indescribable feeling. So currently along with HR investigating security to begin with (because of my appraisal outcome), they've now got the helpdesk putting in complaints against them and there's an account exec who is so fuming with my old LM she must be receiving some sort of disciplinary from this. Silly cow for not caring to begin with.

Whats really got my beef though is that when I tried leaving security she told me I could only go once all my work was handed over even if it meant waiting for the full 4 weeks. the lad on the team who started his new job this week knew full well how to do the approval process and looks like he just swanned off without a care in the world so I'm considering putting in a complaint against her...so that'll be a third kick in the face for her.

EEEE, so thats whats been happening with me today.

So, babies. I don't think I ovulated the other day, my temps didn't stay high and FF removed my cross hairs. But if it's high tomorrow then it'll mean I'm on 3DPO so woo to that! it could turn out right this psychic predication you know ((June conception (more towards the end were her exact words), mid july BFP)).

I'm a bit bummed out cause I was hoping soy would work for me but it looks like it's made me ov later than usual

How have you been? I see you're taking a nice and chilled outlook on TTC which is good to see. Did you take a look at creating that FB group?

 

[MummyP2b]

WOW!!
That really did confuse me. Your job sure does sound like you have to have a brain to work there!
Sounds such a mess tho (from what i gather), Sounds like people in your old job are really fluffing up and need to get their act together. Your old boss being one!
It's nice that you are now being recognised for what you did but I guess it would have been nice to have it when you actually worked within that team! Not after!

And that's really great that you are being put forward for the Bronze award for your hard work! What does the bronze award mean??

so you are working from home today?? Lots of tea, biccies and nice warm feet! I like the sound of that!

Today I have lots of housework in store for me! Since we have been back from our holiday we have both let the house work really slip.
Every week I always get left with the housework!! (slight rant alert!!)
I know I have 3 days off in a row each week which is fab but it means that cos Joe only gets one day off at a time and it's very rare that he has 2 days off today, so the days off he has he likes to spend doing what he wants to do. Which is understandable cos I think If I only had one day off at a time and my next day off was in a few days time, I'd like to sit and slump and do what I wanted to do. But then this means that every day off for him pretty much is a slump day cos he works so hard in the shop.

So the housework gets left to me. Sometimes I do ask if he can do some housework and maybe leave a little note for him so he remembers but more often than not, he only does a little bit of work around the house. Like the other day (tuesday) he had a day off and I had asked him to put a load of washing on and hang it out. Well he put the washing in and on but didn't hang it out, so now that load of washing is STILL sitting there in the machine and is now going to need to be washed again. All cos he then played on the Xbox or started doing the Gardening (which we both agreed we'd do on saturday together)

hmmm.... I'm going to stop now cos I could go on. I'll just get on and do it! I can't really complain too much cos yeah he does do a lot in the house and some things with out bein asked or what ever but I just wish he would see the all work that needs doing in the house and get on with it rather than me asking him to do it or being left and left and then I have to do cos it gets so messy.

Oh well, I guess we weren't called women for nothing!!

Hows work going today?

I'm going to zumba tonight with my mum and possibly my MIL. It's at the school just round the corner from me at 7:30pm. I'm actually really looking forward to it! I have never done it before so should be fun. I'm trying to get into some weekly routine of exercising. I did yoga on monday, I was suppose to go swimming on wednesday and didn't and then I decided I would go swimming last night but then Joe asked if I could pick him up from work (once I had finished work, an hour later than he did) He didn;t realise I was going to go swimming straight after work and then I felt bad cos he had waited an hour and a half after he had finished. So I picked him up and then we both came home. Next week I will DEF go swimming on wednesday. or thursday. And then Zumba on fridays

Because I had got really down about a lot of things, my weight being one of them. I got Joe to weigh me with out me looking and then he would track it and see how I got on, only telling me how much I had lost (or gained) each time.
So this morning I weighed myself and didnt look but he told me that I had lost 3 and a half pounds since last week!!!! YAY!! I am happy with that, and that is without even trying and only one lot of exercise. (But lots of walking around with kiddies)

So what do you think of the name of the group and picture and all?
I'm looking forward it getting more members and for there to be a BIG support group for us all. I'm hoping that when it gets to a certain amount that we could all arrange a big meet (once we start getting to know each other)

YAY for 3dpo!!
xx

 

[Tanzibar83]

The bronze award just mean my contribution to the company has been recognised and I'll get a certificate and everything from it too

Yeah I worked from home yesterday, I stayed in my pyjamas all day...in fact I didn't even get into normal clothes I felt like such a slob...it was great, haha.

You should get joe to do some cleaning, when your preggers you'll need to relax more so he should get to grips with what has to be done now right?

Work went well yesterday but I don't really see it as a working day cause I'll put loads of dvds on and obviously do the work but have a more relaxed approach about it.

Sounds like you had fun at Zumba, are you going again? I bought the kinect game but didn't get into it so sold it (it goes so fast doesn't it)?

your fitness plan sounds like a great idea and oops that Joe had to wait a long time I hope it wasn't raining.

wow you've already lost 3lbs, just imagine how much more will drop off you when you really get into the fitness regime.

I like the group name and piccy, I'm trying to think of more ways to get people myself, it's quite a challenge though isn't it. When I was posting on BnB last night I hoped no one would flag up my posts as advertisements to the mods...luckily I've had nothing yet. A big meeting would be really good, wouldn't it be the funniest thing if we were all pregnant when that happens?

Yeah I'm now on 4dpo and my temps have increased since yesterday and I'm not sure what to make of it, usually 4dpo my temps dip so I'm now thinking hmmm and I pregnant? I know it's early days but here's hoping. My boobs are killing me today, they were extremely sore yesterday and have continued in today. my hips are still sore and I felt really tired after work...meh it could just be nothing.

We've dtd every single night now (sometimes twice) for the past 13 days so I'm fairly confident we caught the egg and I'm fairly confident I have ovulated. this 2 week wait though is torture now. I'm really eager to conceive this cycle cause if I don't it means I have to have that Hycosy exam and I'm really worried about the pain it might cause me.

How have you been? what CD are you on? are you up to anything nice this weekend? I was thinking of going to visit MIL. She received an award from her employers and ended up in the papers so I'm thinking of taking the article around.

I'm not sure if I told you but me and James ended up in a magazine at the end of last year, was all James doing. He entered this competition on facebook (I'll send you the link privately) - anywho the competition was hosted by Orange the mobile phone company and the question to the fans was "if you take a pose from your favourite film which would it be and why". The prize was having that pose re-created and it would go in the xmas edition of the magazine...and yep you guessed it James won!

He chose it's a wonderful life (the james stewart film) and originally it was just him going down to london for the day, all expenses paid trip too, but then he told them he'd like me to be there so we both got to dress up for the day. They hired some child models too.

It was so funny when the magazine came out cause we went into one orange shop in preston and we asked the guy behind the counter for a load of copies to which he did but you should have seen the look on his face when I said "thats us on the back page" - he had to double take! I dragged James around every orange shop I could find for like a month after and we did the whole (very loudly too) "look dear thats us on the back page" - we're saddos but that sort of thing only happens once right.

I think they're still doing the competition (now monthly) on the orange wednesday FB group, you should enter it, you and Joe can have a go.

A couple of months later James entered another competition with them and won again, he got a goody bag full of memorabilia from the film the unstoppables, he got a beanie, a bag, a 4gb usb (in the style of the train from the film) and some other stuff too.

So thats all the butlers who have now been in a magazine or newspaper in the last 12 months. next stop hollywood, haha.

 

[MummyP2b]

How are you doing Tan????? I really hope you are ok! Wish I lived closer to you so I could give you a great big hug!! I hope James is looking after you!

Sorry I havent been in touch for a while!!

Signed up for the gym so have been doing lots of classes. Just got back form an aqua energy class which was great fun! Looking forward to getting on the scales on sunday and seeing the numbers drop!! (hopefully)

I'm so sorry AF showed for you!! I have just read your post on your journal and TOTALLY agree with you!! Life isnt fair sometimes!! I'm here for you all the way.

Was thinking earlier i should give you my number if you wanted to text me at any time about anything... random stuff!! I'll PM you!

So I hate to ask this but you now have to have that dreaded Hycosy exam!! When will you have to have that?

I hope you are ok and have been eating lots of chocolate!!! You deserve it hun!!

And you will be such an amazing mummy!!! I really hope and really want your time to be very very soon!!!! Like next cycle maybe!!?!

xx

 

[Tanzibar83]

Hey Non, Aw you are so sweet! yes distance is such a nightmare but I'm glad there's things like the internet so we can keep up to date with one another

I'm feeling a bit better every day. I said to James though if my body is still in pain on Monday then I'll have to go see a Doctor cause it wasn't just my usual AF cramps, it was my stomach, my sides...the lot, at one point I wondered if my apendix might be bursting or if it was food poisoning it felt that bad. I do actually feel like I've been proper ill though, it's like generally feeling quite hazy and my body is tired and run down. But anyway I'm feeling better today but the pain is still everywhere.

James, bless him bought me a huge bouquet of flowers the day AF showed and he's been pampering me like crazy so he's been a real sweethear lately.

My sister stayed last night so I've not been able to post as much as I wanted. She dropped me back from my mum and dads on wednesday (I felt so ill I couldn't drive so james took me). I text james before we set off telling him to hide all the baby making stuff and he did pretty well, he hid my OPKS, my folic acid and made sure the bathroom was baby free but he missed a pregnancy test wrapped I left on the window sil!! my heart nearly fell out of my mouth when I saw it and my sister was looking in that general direction at the flowers so I had to awkwardly block her vision and sneakily snatch the wrapper away.

I'm sort of getting to a point with TTC where I just couldn't care less if people started finding out but the thing that stops me is pressure, I know it would put so much onto us and it's been hard so far so it's not something I want to add into the mix.

Glad to see you've been having fun at the gym, it sounds like you're making full use of the gym at any rate, I'm sure you'll be showing them pro's a thing or 2 shortly enough

I was reading the Hycosy leaflet yesterday they basically shove this thing through my cervix (and I really wish it was times like this where I hadn't seen images of the cervix itself), the procedure is only half an hour which I think I mentioned in last nights text and I've asked for the day off so at least I won't be pressured into working afterwards, no doubt James will treat me to something. We cant DTD until after this exam, I think it's just because they want it to be as clean as possible which is fair enough I guess.

I've been drinking that fertilitea, it's an OK taste but I'm willing to stick to it religiously, I'm not sure if I need to keep drinking it after I've achieved a shorter cycle...hmmm I should research into that. I'm actually hoping this will be the miracle drink that cures my long cycles. I read this one review on amazon and someone gave it a 1 star cause they thought it would help them get pregnant and it messed up their very regular of a normal 30 day cycle and gave them a 20 something day instead. I was over the moon to read that. this person even suggested the stuff is for irregular cycles!

Thanks for the support, it's been so frustrating not telling anyone offline but I'm happy with the current situation, I certainly couldn't have asked for a better TTC buddy.

What have you been up to this weekend? the weather has been really funny up here, it's cloudy but really warm and now it's really sunny but looks windy...so confusing :S

Finally after 18+ months contemplating I've sent off for a new passport. We've decided to go away for the anniversary but we are't going to Norway as first planned, instead we're going to Orlando. I can't remember how I found out but the night I was pricing up Noway holidays I came across Florida prices and get this...America is cheaper!!! So now I'm going through the nightmare process of finding that "perfect" place for the 2 of us. The weather will still be nice at that time of year and as it's November we're hoping there won't be as many kids.

I must admit though a teeny weeny part of me hopes I'm not pregnant when we go just so I go on all the rides without worrying, but if I am preggers I hope to go on as much as I can still. I'll let you know when we've booked it.

So do you think you're DPO now or near ovulation?

I'm trying to cut down on caffiene and this fertilitea has come at a good time for me, so here's hoping we both get some good results soon.