U.S. Mommies To Be

[RosieCheeks]

I just got back from the sono and the tech said that she is 99% sure that its a GIRL!! I am soooo shocked that I almost fell off the bed. I have been having such strong feelings since day one that its a boy. On a side note, I have to go back in 3 weeks because they couldn't see the heart because the baby was upside down but we did get to hear it. They also said that the baby is measuring about 1 week behind and I am freaking out about it. Has anyone every experienced that and then have the baby catch up?

I also posted this on the 2nd trimester forum to see if any other ladies have been through this.

 

[lisaf]

Well, I had tons of scans... my first scan was perfect to the DAY... my next scan, exactly 7 days later only showed 5 days growth... after that my baby measured 3-5 days ahead of my EDD every time.

So it CAN vary a bit! I wouldn't worry too much about one scan being a little off. You're getting another scan in a few weeks to check the heart, so you won't have long to wait and I do think most of the time they catch up. Also if you and FOB are short people, your baby may measure on the smaller side of 'average'.

congrats on the girl! I was so sure mine was a girl but was totally wrong too! So much for mother's intuition, eh?

 

[southerngal2]

Ok so I can't believe this is actually happening to me right now.

I have been with the same company for 6 years. I am in an accounting position and also over one of the divisions of our company.
I have taken time off before, for my honeymoon and vacation and for the death of my grandfather. Each time I have taken off there was another lady that has covered for me while I was gone. She has been with the company for 2.5 years. So she is pretty well trained to cover my job in my absence.

Well my supervisor told me yesterday that I was going to be moved to the receptionist desk to start answering phones and that the lady that usually covers for me will do my job. I'm like ok, for how long? ( I was thinking it was for training)
She answered with " Well we don't know if anything will happen to you because you are pregnant, and you will be gone for 6 weeks, so we will just leave it like this for however long."

EXCUSE ME!?!?! WHAT!?!?! So I was demoted and now can't do my job because I'm pregnant and leaving for 6 weeks! This is illegal!
I'm not due until June and it's only January! I'm not going to be allowed to do my job for the five months I'm here, and I am demoted to receptionist on top of that! This isn't fair!

I really want to quit but I need my insurance and we also have a paid maternity benefit that I need. I'm stuck!

What would you do? Would you contact a lawyer? I've read on the internet that you can not be demoted because of pregnancy and she flat out said that I was being demoted because I was pregnant and they didn't know what would happen.

 

[LadyofRohan]

Ok so I can't believe this is actually happening to me right now.

I have been with the same company for 6 years. I am in an accounting position and also over one of the divisions of our company.
I have taken time off before, for my honeymoon and vacation and for the death of my grandfather. Each time I have taken off there was another lady that has covered for me while I was gone. She has been with the company for 2.5 years. So she is pretty well trained to cover my job in my absence.

Well my supervisor told me yesterday that I was going to be moved to the receptionist desk to start answering phones and that the lady that usually covers for me will do my job. I'm like ok, for how long? ( I was thinking it was for training)
She answered with " Well we don't know if anything will happen to you because you are pregnant, and you will be gone for 6 weeks, so we will just leave it like this for however long."

EXCUSE ME!?!?! WHAT!?!?! So I was demoted and now can't do my job because I'm pregnant and leaving for 6 weeks! This is illegal!
I'm not due until June and it's only January! I'm not going to be allowed to do my job for the five months I'm here, and I am demoted to receptionist on top of that! This isn't fair!

I really want to quit but I need my insurance and we also have a paid maternity benefit that I need. I'm stuck!

What would you do? Would you contact a lawyer? I've read on the internet that you can not be demoted because of pregnancy and she flat out said that I was being demoted because I was pregnant and they didn't know what would happen.

Definitely contact a lawyer, what she is doing is illegal. Is your pay being cut as well or is she just shifting you into this other position?

Also, I know you said that she said it to you. Is there any way you can get the reason in writing? Maybe you can email her and ask her to spell out what this move in position entails and the reason for it so you have something in writing? Or just write an email to see if she'll just confirm it? You can say "Per our conversation earlier today, I am going to be given the receptionist desk to do tasks X, Y, and Z while Sally takes over my current position due to my pregnancy" and then see if she will confirm/deny it and if she'll have anything else to add.

 

[southerngal2]

My pay is not being cut, but I will not be up for a raise because my duties have gone down.
Don't have anything in writing but I will email her and see if she will confirm it.

 

[LadyofRohan]

My pay is not being cut, but I will not be up for a raise because my duties have gone down.
Don't have anything in writing but I will email her and see if she will confirm it.

Did she give a reason why she is switching you to this position so soon? Considering that you aren't due until June (and presumably not taking off maternity leave until then), why would she have to replace you in January? It doesn't really make sense to me.

 

[southerngal2]

It doesn't make sense to me either.
She said because she doesn't know if anything will happen and I'll have to leave early.

I do understand that my position needs to be covered in my absence, but it doesn't need to be taken away from me.

 

[Annunakian]

Geez, what a crap boss she is being. No advice, southern, but good luck. I hope you get it in writing and a lawyer can do something for you.

 

[lisaf]

Wow, that is blatantly illegal. Is there anyone else who heard her say that was the reason? She might be dumb enough to confirm it in writing but if she thinks you're trying to get it confirmed it might send up red-flags for a lawsuit and put her on her guard.

I would definitely try to get it documented somehow. They cannot demote you or reduce responsibilities due to pregnancy unless you request it or are physically restricted from doing your job by your doctor.
In order to do anything legally, you actually have to apply for the right to sue (not that it needs to go that far, but just an FYI). I believe you have to apply to the EEOC first.
Get whatever you can in writing before even hinting that you are questioning the legality of what they are doing.

Hopefully, once you have that in your back pocket, you can approach HR and explain that this is discrimination and you just want to keep your regular job etc!

 

[southerngal2]

Thanks for the advice.

Our office staff is only 10 people. My supervisor is HR! So I can't go there.

 

[lisaf]

Yikes, hmm, then I would get some kind of evidence first for sure that she's said this is pregnancy-related. Then I would confront her kindly and just say that you are not trying to be a pill, but that its not ok with you to be demoted simply because of your pregnancy. If she says 'too bad'... tell her that it seems rather like discrimination to you. If she is not willing to re-think her position, don't say another word, just contact the EEOC etc. Once you've done the first steps with them, I'd possibly contact a laywer for advice on this, but at least go back to your supervisor and tell her that you've looked into it and her actions are illegal and that you really just want what is fair and to be reinstated etc...
You could also try contacting your supervisor's boss somewhere in these steps because you really aren't looking for some big lawsuit payday, you just dont' want to be discriminated against and your supervisor is putting the company in jeapardy etc.

They can do this stuff if they claim its for business reasons (downsizing etc) but they cannot do it if they say its for pregnancy. One reason its very hard to prove discrimination is because most people are careful enough to claim its for other reasons. So if you have no proof of this, its going to be VERY hard to push them or even pursue legal action.

One analogy to bring to your supervisor is that if you were going to have surgery and needed 6 weeks to recover, that you wouldn't be demoted in anticipation of that! Also that there is no reason to assume you might have to leave early and let her know when you anticipate leave to start.

One thing companies often do is bring women back from maternity leave at a lower level position but keep their high pay... many women don't fight that, but what ends up happening is that in the next round of layoffs, you will be the first to go because you're overpaid for what you do etc. They are supposed to reinstate you after leave at a similar position for responsibilities AND pay. By demoting you ahead of time, they could be setting up to let you go for other reasons (too many receptionists etc...).

 

[lisaf]

oh, and FYI I'm not a lawyer or anything, lol... just that I work for a small company that is clueless about the legal way to do things so I've researched the heck out of maternity leave laws (my HR rep was telling me stuff in my favor that just wasn't true.. because all she was reading was a stupid pamphlet! If I had taken the leave the way she said I could, they could have figured out I wasn't entitled to it while I was gone and changed things on me and told me to come back sooner etc!).

If you want specific advice on your exact situation, www.laborlawtalk.com has a whole maternity leave section with super helpful advice! Make sure to tell them how long you've worked there, how many employees work for the company within a 75 mile radius, and if you've worked 1,250 hours in the past 12 months. Also make sure to tell them what state you are in, but I believe in your state you only have FMLA if eligible, and the pregnancy discrimination act to protect you. They can help tell you exactly who to contact and in what order etc!

 

[luckyme225]

sorry that happened to you southerngal. I would contact I lawyer because they can't demote you just because your pregnant and will have to take a leave of absence when the baby comes.

 

[southerngal2]

Thanks for the link lisa! Lots of info there.

I think she realized what she was saying and that other people were hearing because she came in my office yesterday as I was trying to get my stuff together and said that I was not doing my job.
Nice thing to say to a pregnant hormonal lady! It was at lunch time and I left in tears! I can't believe after 6 years with a company working my butt off that I am being treated this way.
I'm going to contact EEOC and see what they say about the situation. But from what I've read , it looks like they are totally in the wrong.

 

[LadyofRohan]

I'm sorry, southerngirl. Did she give you examples of how you aren't doing your job, etc? If you've had rave reviews the past 6 years and then all of the sudden you 'aren't doing your job' then something is definitely up.

 

[southerngal2]

Well let's see, I got yelled at for about 15 minutes because I was not using my file folder correctly.
Yep that's right a FILE FOLDER! It's the kind with the fasteners at the top and I wasn't putting the papers thru both the fasteners.But no one goes to the files anymore because our office is set up as paperless. I just keep all my papers in case the server crashes. She had no reason to be in the file cabinet anyway. All the papers are scanned in to the computer because we are paperless.
It's all petty BS stuff like that. And I almost wanted to laugh until it went on for 15 minutes!

 

[jocelynmarie]

Hi all!

Just wanted to introduce myself. I'm fairly new to the boards, and just finally saw this group!! I'm 29 and expecting my first child at the end of August. I'm near Minneapolis, MN.

As great as the ladies are from the UK, its nice to have a group for us!

 

[southerngal2]

Hi jocelynmarie! Welcome to the group!

 

[RosieCheeks]

OMG that is crazy southern. I would definately try to document it and get some legal advice. Good luck!

 

[RosieCheeks]

Hi and welcome Jocelynmarie.