upset,hurt and confused -*updated on p1 for the last time!*

[Carolyn]

my baby was 7lbs 11ozs 8 weeks ago at birth.

today she is 8lbs 4 1/2 ozs.

she is breastfed, aparently she is not putting on enough weight.

hv and dr said give one formua feed a day.

i'm upset that my boobs apparently aren't giving her the good start she should have.

i'm hurt that they would suggest bottles when they are supposed to be promoting breastfeeding. it goes against what they led me to believe was 'right'.

confused. i have low iron count/am anaemic, is this the reason?

she's grown in length and her head has grown.

any advice please?

well, she was weighed yesterday and had put on 11 and a half ounces!

so that's great!

didn't go to my hv, just went to a drop in centre and the hv there was GREAT. she immediately said that my low iron AND 'bad birth experience' wee cotriuting factors to bubs not fattening up.

i am over the moon.

the domperidone worked? or maybe my better 'mood' amd iron?

the hv said hopefully she'll have made at least half a pound next week. if not..formula...arghhhh(that was the only downside)

have we BOTH turned a corner this ast week? fingers crossed.

22nd oct well had her weighed yesterday and she made another half a pound! yipee. she had had 4 formula 'top ups' not replacement feeds. oh really liked feeding her and it gave the grandparents chance to take her out for longer than an hour!

she looks like she's bloody thriving now!

so thanks for all your help on this matter, it has been useful and has contributed to baby abigail piling on the pounds and ounces!

 

[Whisper]

Not really sure what to suggest hun.

I think you are doing a great job b/fing she must be getting goodness from you, besides b/f babies don't follow the chart for weight gain that formula babies do.

The only thing i could think of is perhaps she isn't getting quite enough hindmilk? How long do you feed her for on each breast?
If you are unsure if she has reached the hindmilk you could express/squeeze a little milk out to see where she is at and if you don't think she is there then pop her back on?

don't feel upset maybe speak to a lactation consultant they should be able (i would have thought) to advise on the anemia and if it affects the breast milk...

xx

 

[Carolyn]

thanks whisper

i've phoned the breast feeding advisor in the area, she's going to get back to me

she feeds for twenty minutes quality sucking every two hours in day, every 4-6 hours in night. mostly she works on one breast at a time.

could i have too much of the fore milk? is that poss...

 

[claire1983]

maybe try taking multi vitamins made for feeding mums but I cant believe they have told you that - your baby has put on weight and feeds well, I dont see how giving a bottle will help - it will just make breastfeeding more difficult.

 

[Samantha675]

If she is thriving, then I would not worry so much. Many times they use charts for formula fed babies, and breast babies gain differently. Talk to the lactation specialist and go from there.

 

[Whisper]

It sounds like she is doing perfectly well to me (but i am by no means an expert).

I have been reading about foremilk and hindmilk and we actually only produce 1 type of milk but the foremilk has less fatty deposits in it, as the baby feeds the fatty deposits in the breast get stirred up and go into the milk.....creating the hindmilk. So when the baby feeds frequently (cluster feeding in the evenings usually) they are getting more and more hindmilk (heavier milk takes longer to digest so they can sleep for longer) as the fatty deposits have less time to settle.....Does that make sense?

Anyhow my point is, if she is feeding every 2hours still during the day she would be getting enough of those fatty deposits (hindmilk).
And like Samantha said if she is thriving and you are happy with her then don't worry too much, i mean you spend 24/7 with her if something wasn't right you would be the first person to notice!

 

[Margerle]

Some babies are not growing juggernauts!

Some babies grow very slowly. If she's following a pattern of growth albeit slow, I wouldn't worry. Eat well, take your multivitamins, make sure she's well hydrated (lots of wet nappies), her nails are growing, etc.

You're doing well hon!

Read the following:
https://www.drjaygordon.com/development/bf/scales.asp

Look at the BABY NOT THE SCALE!

 

[mBLACK]

maybe try taking multi vitamins made for feeding mums but I cant believe they have told you that - your baby has put on weight and feeds well, I dont see how giving a bottle will help - it will just make breastfeeding more difficult.

I had to formula feed when I was in the hospital - apparently there's more calories or something?
I'm sorry you feel this way, I know how it feels & it's awful. But maybe you should just feed her some formula until she starts gaining weight more rapidly and pumping while doing so, then try breastfeeding again?

 

[mBLACK]

Then again my baby wasn't gaining weight at all.. so maybe you should just concentrate on feeding her when she's hungry & making sure she's alert, etc. If she is you shouldn't be concerned about her weight.

 

[Margerle]

Breast milk and formula have the same calories at 20 calories an ounce.

One has to get or make special formula to get 22 or 24 calorie milk.

 

[ryder]

Well I dont really believe any doctors I know would make a suggestion or statement about a baby's weight gain based soley on a chart. Charts are guildlines, however, none that I know go strictly by charts. Im sure the doctor has concerns based on other things as well and is only looking out for the well-being of your baby... She has gained just over a pound in almost 2 months... which is not very much at all.

Dont feel bad... Lots of women here feed mixed and have no issues.

I agree though if you wish to pursue something, look into vitamins and speak to a specialist. Make sure you are eating and drinking well yourself, especially with being anemic. Most women dont drink enough fluids while BF and that can affect your supply.

 

[KarenLV]

Some babies are slow in the first two months and then shoot up at a phenomenal rate.Keep drinking multivitamins for breastfeeding mother and keep yourself hydrated.Dont be discouraged.Soon you will see results.Good luck!

 

[marley2580]

Well I dont really believe any doctors I know would make a suggestion or statement about a baby's weight gain based soley on a chart.

Actually lots of doctors and HVs seem to do exactly this.

Kaya was slow to gain as well, but she was healthy and happy so I didn't worry. I think it was someone on here who was told by their health visitor that babies can't grow length ways and put on weight at the same time. She has grown and put on weight so I wouldn't worry too much.

 

[Serene123]

I'm sure I read on the tin of formula that it's 67 calories per oz! Must have read it wrong. I did think that was an awful lot.

 

[Serene123]

Doctors and HVs ALWAYS comment on babies weight gain. They think it's their right. I believe they should'nt comment unless the baby is serverely underweight and losing weight/not growing and/or the mother asks for their opinion!

Your little girl is doing just fine, she is growing and she is happy. She is not screaming so she is not hungry.

 

[sam's mum]

Well I dont really believe any doctors I know would make a suggestion or statement about a baby's weight gain based soley on a chart.

Actually lots of doctors and HVs seem to do exactly this.

Kaya was slow to gain as well, but she was healthy and happy so I didn't worry. I think it was someone on here who was told by their health visitor that babies can't grow length ways and put on weight at the same time. She has grown and put on weight so I wouldn't worry too much.

A lot of them do - Sam had a couple of weeks where he didn't gain much and I was told that if his weight gain the next week was lower than expected I'd need to give him a bottle of formula a day too (even though he was always perfectly content after a feed and seemed to be feeding well). About 2 days after that he started feeding all the time (late 6 week growth spurt I think as he was almost 8 weeks) and his weight went back up. At the time he was slepping through the night so I would easily have been able to give him and extra feed from me if I wanted him to have more, but they didn't even suggest that.

As other people have said, all babies are different, and some doctors know very little about breastfeeding. I'd see how her weight gain is in a week (as long as she still seems to be feeding well and you're getting lots of wet and dirty nappies) before you even think about changing anything if she seems content x

 

[Carolyn]

Well I dont really believe any doctors I know would make a suggestion or statement about a baby's weight gain based soley on a chart.

Actually lots of doctors and HVs seem to do exactly this.

Kaya was slow to gain as well, but she was healthy and happy so I didn't worry. I think it was someone on here who was told by their health visitor that babies can't grow length ways and put on weight at the same time. She has grown and put on weight so I wouldn't worry too much.

A lot of them do - Sam had a couple of weeks where he didn't gain much and I was told that if his weight gain the next week was lower than expected I'd need to give him a bottle of formula a day too (even though he was always perfectly content after a feed and seemed to be feeding well). About 2 days after that he started feeding all the time (late 6 week growth spurt I think as he was almost 8 weeks) and his weight went back up. At the time he was slepping through the night so I would easily have been able to give him and extra feed from me if I wanted him to have more, but they didn't even suggest that.

As other people have said, all babies are different, and some doctors know very little about breastfeeding. I'd see how her weight gain is in a week (as long as she still seems to be feeding well and you're getting lots of wet and dirty nappies) before you even think about changing anything if she seems content x

abigail sleeps through the night sometimes and they didn't suggest that i could feed her then either!

neither did they suggest the vitamin route!

nor did they mention that the lboody charts are based on babies who are bottle fed!!!!!

i feel so let down by THEM, the so called professionals. and i feel so supported by you ladies, i can't thank you enough.

my baby is growing in length, and head size. she does have very wet nappies. she sleeps well. i think she's happy.

so i'm going to ring the bf consultant again, get vitamins and feed her when she tells me she wants feeding!

(in the past two weeks i also cut out the 'comfort' sucking to a large degree. because the hv said baby was becoming too clingy. i fed her and put her down, most of the time! baby was happy with this arrangement - if she wasn't and cried i popped her back on. when i asked if i should keep up this routine in light of the weight issues, she said 'yes you don't want a clingy baby!'. surely all little extra sucks will help, or do i take what i see as the easy option and formula feed???)


god i'm sorry this is soooooo long. it's just the more i think about it, the more irrate i am. for further hilarity on how crap my drs are, see thread about my 8 week check up....


thankyouuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuu

 

[Whisper]

hun it sounds like you are doing everything absolutely right.
She tells you when she is hungry, i don't think there is enough support from Health visitors, even though my LO has gained an immense amount of weight from just b/f she was still very keen for me to give her formula!!

I have noticed that my LO has been nursing differently the last week or so, she will feed continously (sp?) for about 5-10mins then she sort of moves her head around and nibbles at me (comfort sucking i guess) so i take her off and burp change nappy etc and put her back on, she continues with the nibbling and then after a couple of minutes she starts feeding again....do you think your LO might be doing the same?

I just tried it last night leaving her on even though she wasn't feeding and was just 'faffing' around, it was a good few minutes before she started feeding again but she came off on her own and didn't cry.

I have read your other thread and your after care is truly shocking from these so called professional's, i mean if you didn't come to this forum or have access to other information you would think that is the norm and acceptable, it totally isn't.

 

[marley2580]

Comfort sucking is NOT going to lead to a clingy baby. Your baby will become clingy no matter what - it's a normal part of their development. There's actually research which suggests that if you comfort a baby whenever they need it, the child will become more independent a lot quicker as they are more secure. Google Attachment Theory for more info on this.

 

[Whisper]

HV and doctors say the weirdest things, i just remembered my HV telling me that if i put Amelia on the boob everytime she cried (this was the first week i had her and we were still getting to know one another) that she would learn to resent me as she would think 'oh no don't feed me again!'.
Has anyone else been told this?