VENT THREAD! Things you wish you could say but can't

[AlyCon]

cntrygrl you could always start a vent thread in the "TTC #1" section! Not sure if they already have one, but its worth a try!

 

[cntrygrl]

Very much so. I stopped doing OPK's they were stressing me out too much.

 

[nic18]

Nic18 Thanks! Although i cant help but get the feeling that i've made that same speech at least once before. But you know how that goes..

yeah i know i've seen other posts about people saying this

 

[havestar]

Honestly if you cant take the heat, get out of the kitchen. Coming into the vent thread "just to read" the vents is like looking for trouble. Anyone who decides to scroll through most likely will find SOMETHING that offends them....

Pot, meet kettle.

You seem to be the one who can't take the heat. I am free to post my opinions, just as anyone else.

ITS LIKE GOING TO ANOTHER COUNTRY AND BEING OFFENDED BY THEIR CULTURE.

Your analogy makes no sense. What exactly qualifies as a TTCer? Is the fact that I have three children already and haven't been trying for X amount of months an automatic disqualification? I find it really insensitive that you would discriminate against me when you don't know what I've been through in the past or where I'm at now. I am TTC and I was offended by her vent. Plain and simple.

I came in here to post a rant and got sidetracked when I read over the last couple. Hence the reason my post is only a couple after hers.

but this vent thread was set up for people to get whatever is bothering them off there mind without offending anybody, because they are not talking about anyone of this forum (i hope)

Maybe this should be expressed in the first post, which I did read for rules.

I find this thread to be mean to mothers and the way they raise children. Vent over in TTC #1 if you want to rant against women who already have children or them not spoiling a child.

This. Exactly.

 

[nic18]

Honestly if you cant take the heat, get out of the kitchen. Coming into the vent thread "just to read" the vents is like looking for trouble. Anyone who decides to scroll through most likely will find SOMETHING that offends them....

Pot, meet kettle.

You seem to be the one who can't take the heat. I am free to post my opinions, just as anyone else.

ITS LIKE GOING TO ANOTHER COUNTRY AND BEING OFFENDED BY THEIR CULTURE.

Your analogy makes no sense. What exactly qualifies as a TTCer? Is the fact that I have three children already and haven't been trying for X amount of months an automatic disqualification? I find it really insensitive that you would discriminate against me when you don't know what I've been through in the past or where I'm at now. I am TTC and I was offended by her vent. Plain and simple.

I came in here to post a rant and got sidetracked when I read over the last couple. Hence the reason my post is only a couple after hers.

but this vent thread was set up for people to get whatever is bothering them off there mind without offending anybody, because they are not talking about anyone of this forum (i hope)

Maybe this should be expressed in the first post, which I did read for rules.

I find this thread to be mean to mothers and the way they raise children. Vent over in TTC #1 if you want to rant against women who already have children or them not spoiling a child.

This. Exactly.

havestar, sorry if any over our posts have offended you, but you have to understand when we get post offending us its not nice. when we vent we don't want to offend people at all! and no you are not disqualified at all but when its peoples first which i agree this should be in ttc#1 because we have a different view for people ttc there 2nd/3rd and so on . so please don't take anything to heart, or feel you cannot post on here because you can, but everyone needs to respect each others views, but cannot have a personal attack!

 

[KT Brown]

I am ttc and I am ready to give it up. Being TTC makes you so much more alert then I wanted to be. I don't want to know who's pregnant, or hear another person brag about their BFP! I don't want to wonder and hope. I am ready to let it go.

 

[havestar]

havestar, sorry if any over our posts have offended you, but you have to understand when we get post offending us its not nice. when we vent we don't want to offend people at all! and no you are not disqualified at all but when its peoples first which i agree this should be in ttc#1 because we have a different view for people ttc there 2nd/3rd and so on . so please don't take anything to heart, or feel you cannot post on here because you can, but everyone needs to respect each others views, but cannot have a personal attack!

I can agree with that. And maybe in retrospect I should have just PMed her (I'm assuming we can do that, I've never messaged anyone) and told her what I thought.

I do apologize if whatever I said seemed excessively harsh, but my statement about whenever she has kids she'll understand was not intentionally mean or neglectful of her TTC journey. I was simply pointing out that until you've been in the same situation you have no idea what it's like or how you'd react.

 

[AlyCon]

Havestar i respect your opinon and everybody elses. I never said you couldnt post here, anybody and everybody is welcome Just try your best not to get offended and even if you are do not target the OP of the "offensive post" with a personal attack. and choose your words more wisely, which is all i was trying to say in the first place. And i really do understand your point about "if you havent been through it dont judge those that are dealing with it." But just because we're ttc our first doesnt mean we have ZERO experience with children. I've been out with my niece several times and shes thrown tantrums and i've gotten the "oh my god get control over your kid" looks. But i just deal with them. And then a few days later when im out by myself i'll still catch myself giving another woman the look. so i've been on both sides of the fence and i get your point. Again, it all came down to your word choice.

 

[AlyCon]

I am ttc and I am ready to give it up. Being TTC makes you so much more alert then I wanted to be. I don't want to know who's pregnant, or hear another person brag about their BFP! I don't want to wonder and hope. I am ready to let it go.

Dont give up! Sending you lots of

 

[nic18]

havestar, sorry if any over our posts have offended you, but you have to understand when we get post offending us its not nice. when we vent we don't want to offend people at all! and no you are not disqualified at all but when its peoples first which i agree this should be in ttc#1 because we have a different view for people ttc there 2nd/3rd and so on . so please don't take anything to heart, or feel you cannot post on here because you can, but everyone needs to respect each others views, but cannot have a personal attack!

I can agree with that. And maybe in retrospect I should have just PMed her (I'm assuming we can do that, I've never messaged anyone) and told her what I thought.

I do apologize if whatever I said seemed excessively harsh, but my statement about whenever she has kids she'll understand was not intentionally mean or neglectful of her TTC journey. I was simply pointing out that until you've been in the same situation you have no idea what it's like or how you'd react.

yeah you can PM! i know you never ment it to be hurtful, but like said abpve just think about word choice, but alot of us ladies ttc#1 do pin point little things like that, whereas people who have had children don't really see things like that as hurtful

 

[Wobbles]

I'm so sorry but I have closed this thread ... yet another thread that needs reviewing.

The team and I will be having a discussion about how to handle recent 'vent' threads and if we should now prevent these in the future. They are causing too much bad feelings not forgetting the back lash the team will probably get now because we can't win. Journals can be used for venting.

I see both sides of the feelings, well those who managed to express themselves without being rude. Members should remember there are Mums/Moms on the forum who are using the TTC sections and Mums/Moms shouldn't take anyone's venting as personal (if you think a reply is targeted at a member or the forum you should use the report post feature).

Havestar your participation was not acceptable forum activity, I'm sure you would not take to kindly to being told to shut up by someone who doesn't understand a situation in your life. Ladies who are TTC #1 will find your post incredibly insensitive and lacking empathy in some cases with such a manner. I'd like to request that maybe you take your own advice in the future (since it seems acceptable in your world) before submitting your post ... On a serious note the preview option is a good feature maybe think about using it?