Waiting for AF after M/C, anyone else? OCBM

[Literati_Love]

Alt - hope you're hanging in there!

Kim- wow, 6 weeks already! How do you feel?

Bright - sorry you have to wait for May now.

Lindsay - are you enjoying your last few weeks of mat leave? I hope the weather has been nice over there! We seem to be getting an early spring (so far) which feels amazing. I am going to start taking Nevada on some walks soon.

Crys - how are things going?

Linny - how is poor Elka doing? I saw your post about her having croup. I can't believe the bad luck you've had with sicknesses! We just recently got over a rough couple weeks where Nevada had such a bad cold we literally had to stay up all night holding her upright so she could breathe one night, and for several nights I was up a lot with her as she screamed every time I put her down. Then it turned out she had bronchitis so we had to do 10 days of antibiotics. DH and I were both sick and it was just such an exhausting two weeks! I very much felt for you remembering how sick you all have been lately!

 

[Lindsay109]

Still thinking of you Diana! Hope all is going well

LL, yes, we have had beautiful weather! It's been an amazing spring and we haven't had nearly the amount of rain we usually have. Rowan and I were down at the beach today and we didn't even need jackets. He loves crawling around in the sand, over the logs, etc. I hope your weather continues to improve so you can start going out on walks, it sure is nice to get out of the house. This is my last week of mat leave - I go back next week for 2 afternoons. In some ways I'm looking forward to it (for example I'll actually get to sit down for more than 5 minutes at a time, lol.....trying to be positive), but don't really feel ready for it yet. Oh well, such is life and I'm sure we will adjust. I've been told the first couple weeks are the hardest, and then it gets easier. Any news on your work situation? Have you spoken to them at all yet?

Linny, I also saw your post about Elka's croup - poor little thing, she's had a really rough winter with illnesses! Poor you guys too, it must be so hard seeing her sick. I hope she's feeling better soon and gets a little break from being sick!

 

[Linnypops]

Di - how are you doing love?

Bright - sorry things have been delayed - bit I hope everything goes well when you do the transfer

Lit - ah love so sorry to hear Nevadas been ill too - we've ha the same thing with crying when trying to lie her down. Well it's been up and down really, night before last she fell asleep in my arms and was fine to be put down after but last night was up and down trying to get her to sleep. Every time I put her down she started coughing and waking herself up again so eventually I just put her down on her side and rubbed her back. Upset for a wee bit but went to sleep like that till 7. Is Nevada feeling better now? I'm off work today ill - I really need to rest and Elka's at nursery so I can (she's fine during the day!) - really weird being at home on my own!

Lindsay - ah love back to work is a weird mix of sadness and kind of good to interact with people again without it being mainly baby talk! Hehe. Took me a few weeks to get used to it but it really helps when you know he littles have settled well with their carers

 

[alternatedi]

Hi ladies!! Sorry I didn't update.

Good news first: my baby girl is here and is kicking behind in the NICU.

Bad news: I went into labor Saturday and delivered her at 11:01pm at 23w1d. Fortunately my hospital intervenes at 23 weeks and quickly stabilized her.

She has been outperforming every statistic there is - she's the most exceptional little person!

Here name is Amal and she weighed 1 pound 7 oz at birth. Today she started her regular feedings and she's doing great so far!

 

[Linnypops]

Di!!!! Congratulations, oh god that is so great that she's doing well, what a litle trooper. I am very fortunate to know a little boy born at that age and he's an absolute wonder x

 

[ljsmummy]

Congratulations Di!! Wonderful that your hospital are doing such an amazing job. A very good friend of mine had her little girl at a time, she weighed just 1lb 3! She is now about to turn 3 and is great friends with my little boy, she is bigger/taller than him and has the personality to match!
Sending you love, best wishes, strength and prayers to you and baby Amal xxxx

 

[klsltsp]

Di OMG congratulations!! sounds like she's doing amazing!! so happy for you.

 

[Literati_Love]

Diana - Wow Congrats! I am so glad Amal is doing even better than expected! I can imagine this would be a stressful time for you but I hope Amal continues to do wonderfully! She is such a feisty one!

Lindsay - I'm sorry you're back at work this week but how wonderful that you only have to do 2 afternoons (trying not to drip with jealousy here). Are you doing a gradual return to work? Or will 2 afternoons/week just be your normal schedule? I hope Rowan does extremely well and that the transition to work is easier than you think. The adult conversation and sitting down for longer periods will be nice, I'm sure. It's good to focus on the positives. I'm sure it will be tough, but you can do it!
I haven't figured out anything with work yet. I'm feeling stressed about it and have been drafting an e-mail to them but it's so hard to know how to word things. I'm not sure if I should just be short and sweet, stay positive and act like I don't even know about my co-worker and see what they say...or if I should be quite detailed and serious and have my negotiating shoes on. It is keeping me up at night to say the least. I'll let you know when I finally do figure things out with them.

Sounds like you had a lot of fun with Rowan at the beach and out and about before you returned to work. I can't wait to bring Nevada to the beach this summer.

Linny - Yes, Nevada is all better now! Thanks. It sounds like you really needed that day off at home to recover! I would imagine it would be very odd to be home alone now! The other day dh drove around a bit with Nevada while I went inside and it felt SO weird. It was only about 15-20 minutes but felt very long and I wasn't sure what to do with myself. Are you and Elka feeling better now? I hope so.

 

[Lindsay109]

Diana - congrats on the arrival of little Amal!!! She sounds like quite a fighter and we'll all be here cheering her on How are you doing? I also know a couple very early preemies and they are both happy healthy young kids now.

LL - yes, I'm doing a gradual return (more for Rowan's benefit than mine) - 2 afternoon for the first 2 weeks, then 4 afternoons for the remainder of April, then 1 whole day and 3 afternoons. When we made the plan, I was quite concerned about how often he was still nursing and what he would do when I was gone for longer periods of time, but he has cut way back on nursing over the last few weeks and is eatings TONS, so I'm not worried about that anymore.

Sorry that you're feeling stressed about work, I'm sure I would feel the same way if I were in your shoes. If it was me I would probably go for short and sweet and just say something like I was considering coming back part time and wondering if they would have any problem with that, and if there would be any consequences of returning part time.... if they're negative or vague or noncommittal you could then follow up with your negotiating shoes on I hope you get it sorted out and things work out the way you want them to - you don't want things keeping you up at night (especially if Nevada is still doing that too, haha). How is she sleeping these days? To give you some hope, Rowan suddenly started sleeping through the night just before 10 months. Most nights he goes right through 6:30/7pm - 7/8am (I honestly NEVER thought that would happen, so it is possible and eventually they do learn how to sleep!)

 

[Literati_Love]

Lindsay - that gradual return to work sounds like a very good idea, especially for Rowan as you say. Gets him used to being away from you and keeps it less stressful on the both of you! That's good to know that he is nursing less often so you don't have to worry about that on top of everything! Sounds like you have a great schedule worked out. Is he getting close to walking yet? He has always seemed very active! Nevada is cruising around on furniture and keeping me on my toes these days.

That's wonderful about Rowan's sleep! I'm glad he is finally sleeping through the night for you. I do hope Nevada gradually gets there on her own because every time I try to do something to fix things I end up feeling very depressed (as I've mentioned before) so I am just going with how she is and if she fixes her sleep, great. Last night she had a very good night for her and only woke up about 5 times (in a 12 hour period). It's usually 7 so who knows...maybe things are getting better. But I have pretty much accepted that she will probably go into toddlerhood not sleeping through the night. All I know is we won't be trying for another baby until she sleeps through the night! Haha.

I like your idea about how to approach work about the PT thing. I think the main thing is just asking WHAT the conditions would be so that I make sure I know what I'm getting myself into. If I seem more positive then maybe they will be more likely to respond positively as well.

 

[bluestars]

Congratulations Di. Sorry for such stressful time. I have just came on to all of this excitement. I will pray for you all. What an amazing little girl you have !!

Kim- Im so ecstatic for you! I have been thinking about you loads. So pleased to see you back. Keep growing little seedling!!!!

Dianna roll on may for you!

All you mummies i hope you are all well. Sorry i havent been on! Who knew being a mummy was soo full time haha only kidding. I dont get very much time to myself. (I dont mind really)

So since i have been last on i have came away from my home again. My Nan has passed away and lots of family issues. However little Asiah is thriving ! Shes 4 months... 5 months on 27th ! (Where does the time go) i wosh this little group where on facebook in a little provate group. I seem to manage to keep in touch better via that and im always think8ng of you all but this is so long to work and read through. Asiah is sitting up!!! Has been since she turned four months!!! However cant roll onto her stomach haha she hates tummy time. Still soley bfing although has sooks of pears apples etc. Talks none stop, giggles all the time and lots of smiles. Shes just my little perfect. Sleeping however.... shes oicks and chooses. Not the bwst...not the worst.

Any of you ladies up for joining a secret page together to keep in touch better ? I could set one up?

 

[Lindsay109]

LL, poor you - I totally remember what it's like to wake up that often. At Nevada's age, Rowan was very similar - doing the every 1.5 - 2 hourly wake ups ALL night long, it's really rough. Hopefully she will surprise you. I also thought we'd be going well into toddlerhood with night wakings (and even now I do anticipate rough sleep patches ahead) but he's sleeping beautifully for the time being. It'll be interesting to see if me going back to work will mess with the sleep at all - hopefully not.

Rowan is getting very close to walking I think. He can stand independently and walks all over the place with his little pushing walker and he's just recently figured out how to back himself out of a corner and turn around with the walker, it's quite cute. He's also learned how to climb which is scary, lol. He managed to get up on the couch the other day, little monkey!

Blue, it's so nice to see an update from you as well I'm sorry to hear about your Nan, and that you've had to be away from ho me again for a while. Hopefully things will settle down for you soon. Asiah sounds like she's doing great!! Time sure does fly doesn't it? Rowan is going to be 1 on tuesday - I can't believe it, it feels like just yesterday he was a tiny baby. I'm definitely up for doing a secret page on Facebook - I also find it easier keeping up with things there.

Kim, how are things going? Did you have your scan yet? I forgot when you said it was going to be.

Diana, I hope you and Amal are doing well! Thinking of you both

 

[Linnypops]

Hey ladies

Di - hope you're doing well!? How's your little lady?

Blue - so great to hear from you! Glad Asiah doing good , wow she's really moving on! Amazing. I'd be totally up for a Facebook group. Shall I start one? I guess we then need to friend one another so ican add everyone to it. If everyone sends me their fb page I can friend you and then add you in.

LL - ugh sleep issues are the worst. It makes it seem like one never ending day! I agree with Lindsay to maybe ask in a softly softly way so you can gauge the situation with work and negotiate from there. I forgot to ask where are you putting Nevada when you go back?

Lindsay - wow! Well done rowan! On both walking and sleepig! Quite unusual it seems to be hitting a milestone and sleeping well. Or so it seems from these boards.

Afm - elka has recovered from croup only o get a horrible vomiting bug which I then got . We were staying at a friends when I got it - every hour all night I was sick. Then my friend also got it. Oh it's been an awful string of bad luck. Elka really not herself recently either. Wondering if it's finally teeth (she has none so far) nursery say she's just wanting to be held and no energy, moaning a lot, not interested in playing. Can't figure it out really. She's trying to crawl and clamber which is great.... Hoping it won't be too long before she's moving about. I feel terrible some days about having to leave her while working - it just seems like she needs me at the mo but I don't have that option.

 

[Literati_Love]

Blue - it's so wonderful to hear from you! Even though you were "kidding" about mommyhood being so full time, I actually was genuinely surprised at first about never having a moment of free time once Nevada was born! Parenting is such an all-encompassing thing...and as you said you don't mind, and neither do I. However, sometimes you don't even realize how much you need a break. I would encourage you to get your DH to watch Asiah while you do something you enjoy regularly, whether that be just taking a bath, going for a walk, joining an exercise class or going for a quick coffee with a friend! Maybe you already do that but honestly it is so easy to lose those simple things and be ok with it but it is important to have a few moments to yourself each week!
Sounds like Asiah is doing very well! They get so fun around that age! Even though the really sweet "baby" stage is over around 4 months, their personalities get a lot more fun around that age!

Very sorry about your Nan.

I would be up for a secret facebook group as well.

Lindsay - I sent an email to work yesterday so hopefully they reply soon! I kept it short, sweet and upbeat. Hopefully it will go over well but waiting for their reply is stressful!!

That's exciting about Rowan learning to walk! I'm sure he will get there soon. They progress so quickly. Nevada isn't climbing for the most part, but the other day she managed to climb up onto the love seat somehow and then immediately started crying. I don't think she actually knew what she was doing and she felt confused once she was up there and didn't know what to do with herself! Hehe.

I hope your return to work doesn't affect Rowan's sleep in the least! I'm also glad his sleep managed to improve even when you had lost hope!

Linny - Nevada will be going to a small home-based daycare when I go back to work. I'm having trouble wih my provider, though. She's my cousin so I am having issues with her not being as professional as I'd like because there is a family connection. Basically she has agreed to watch Her but is bad about replying to any of my messages and we haven't discussed the fine details yet. It is starting to really annoy me so I hope she still works out.

I feel SOOOOO bad for you and Elka with all the illnesses lately! I can't believe your terrible luck. Seems like a bit of a nightmare! I'd imagine it will get easier once she's closer to a year and has developed a stronger immune system. Until then, hang in there! You're doing the best you can! You have to work as you said, and Elka will be ok! She has an awesome and supportive mommy and even though she is not feeling herself these days, I am sure she will start to improve soon! It must be heartbreaking hearing about her being so lethargic at daycare, though.

I'll message you my name. I don't care if you all know my name, but I'd rather it not be mentioned ON BnB since it is so public. Thanks!

 

[dreamingmom]

Hi ladies,

I have not been on BNB since December, so I just took a few minutes to read the most recent post. Congratulations to all the new babies and milestones and prayers and baby dust for all still trying.

Quick refresher on my story: I have been TTC since July 2013. BFP August 2014 and MC a few days after my BFP.

I had high hope to conceive again right away but as usual life had its own plan and Conceiving again right away was not in the cards for me. I started to become very depressed so took a step away from BNB and I tried to focus on other goals in my life. I started a new exercise routine in November(doing Zumba and teaching myself to belly dance) I figured if pregnancy gives you a big belly, I couldn't get to upset when AF came since my new goal was to have a flat belly. I am now up to 4 hours of dancing a week and although I won't say I have a flat belly it is definitely less jiggely. Anyway, I finally made a appointment with my OBGYN to see what my next step is. The appointment is on April 21 which is a bit ironic since that would have been my original due date.
So, with this appointment scheduled, I really tried to focus on not ,worrying about TTC or changing my life style during the two week wait this month like I normally do.
Well, AF is now 3-4 days late and I have all the same pregnancy symptoms I did last time. My nausea started 2 days ago and my Boobs are super full and round, and a bit sore. I am also super tired and noticed today that I kept feeling out of breath. I have not been closely tracking my cycle days but I am about 14 DPO. I have not tested yet because I did not get the BFP the 1st time till 16 DPO and I lost it at 20 DPO. Ideally I want to wait until after 20 DPO but I am scheduled to get my hair dyed on Saturday so I think I should test prior to that. Since, I know your not suppose to get your hair dyed when you are pregnant. I'm not sure how I'm feeling about this, my head is spinning. I am afraid to get my hopes up incase AF is just late, or if it is a BFP I'm terrified that I will loss it again so I am not allowing myself to be positive yet.

 

[Literati_Love]

Dreaming mom- I'm so sorry you've been through such a struggle with conceiving since your MC. That sounds really tough. Good for you for getting in such good shape and trying to stay positive. I really hope this is your rainbow BFP. Good luck with testing in a few days!

 

[Lindsay109]

Linny, poor little Elka, and poor you too!! Sounds like you really have had a very rough winter with illnesses. I hope things settle down soon! At least she'll have natural immunity to lots of bugs after all of this (and you will too ). I hope she starts feeling more like herself soon too, I can imagine it's heartbreaking to leave her when she's acting like that You're doing the best you can and I'm sure Elka knows that too, hang in there! Maybe it is teeth - Rowan was very fussy the week before he got his first 2 teeth (we were away that week and I thought it was just the change in environment). He also had a hard time with the top 4 teeth (and bit me a LOT when he was nursing, ouch!), but just cut tooth number 7 and I didn't notice any signs. So, even if it is teeth, they hopefully will not all be so hard on her.

Rowan is not quite walking yet so we may still have some sleep disruption before that milestone - in fact it's probably quite likely as I have just written about how wonderfully he is sleeping, haha.

I'll send you my FB info too

LL, I'll keep my fingers crossed that your work responds soon, and in a positive way! Aww, poor Nevada up on the loveseat... at least she didn't try to dive head first off of it, lol. Rowan has figured out how to turn around to climb down from things, but at the beginning he would try and go head first, silly boy. You're right, they do change sooo quickly - it's amazing to think of all the things they've learned in the short space of time since they were born. That's good that Nevada is going to a small home based daycare, hopefully your cousin will be more responsive to sorting out the details soon!

Dreaming, sorry to hear about the ongoing difficulties you have been having, but good for you for starting the new exercise routine, etc. Your symptoms sound positive! I'll keep my fingers crossed that this is your rainbow BFP and that you'll have another reason to see the OB/GYN on April 21st

 

[dreamingmom]

Still no AF. POAS this am - BFN. I'm going to try again in a few days if AF is still a no show. If I'm not pregnant then I am sick since I have had a severely sensitive stomach the last few days.

 

[alternatedi]

Hi ladies!!

Amal is still doing wonderfully - she was graduated to the c-pap two days ago and has done much better than expected! I'm so proud of her.

She turns 2 weeks old in 30 minutes - two weeks of miracles. Today I'd be 25w1d - she's such a fierce little fighter.

Here she is holding her daddy's hand:

 

[Literati_Love]

Diana - wow, what tiny and adorable hands Amal has! I'm so glad she is doing so well! I hope you are getting some rest and not feeling too overwhelmed! Amazing that she is 2 weeks old already!

Dreaming - sorry about the BFN. Did you say you got a late BFP with your last pregnancy as well? It is curious about your sensitive stomach the last little while.

Lindsay - oh my! That would have been frightening having Rowan climbing off things head first! It is a good thing he learned quickly! I find Nevada always wants to do the most dangerous things. It isn't enough to cruise around with the couches and love seat... She will ALWAYS find her way back to our rickety end table which could easily topple over under her weight. It gets exhausting pulling her away from that over and over and over again all day long! Haha.
How is Rowan adjusting to your return to work so far? I hope he's handling it with no problems at all!