Waiting to try no. 3 and feel a little weird

[catty]

I still cant decide! im fairly certain we will have a third at some point but the question being when?
we are getting a new car in March, have a 3 bed house but one room has 2 windows so if they couldnt get along then I know I could make that into 2 rooms. realistically id find the money you always do but for me its just so much more scary going for no.3 like its a forbidden amount round here or something. everyone has 2, 3 seems almost crazy to people haha

 

[HAKing]

I still cant decide! im fairly certain we will have a third at some point but the question being when?
we are getting a new car in March, have a 3 bed house but one room has 2 windows so if they couldnt get along then I know I could make that into 2 rooms. realistically id find the money you always do but for me its just so much more scary going for no.3 like its a forbidden amount round here or something. everyone has 2, 3 seems almost crazy to people haha

I can relate. Around here people are shocked to hear we will have one more. I don't think 3 is a lot at all. Quite a few of our friends though have stopped at 2.

 

[Missy08]

I agree...it's almost like after you have 2 people just assume you'll be done. I have noticed a few people on Facebook lately posting about being pregnant with #3. For me, I always knew I wanted 2, and just assumed I'd be done after that but now I'm not sure...

 

[HAKing]

Missy, I don't have too many people with 3 that I know. A friend at work is pregnant with her 3rd now, but it was a surprise.

What do you think you'll decide on #3? Does your dh have an opinion/thoughts either way to make help you decide?

For me it's a no brainier, though I do feel more nervous about it then I did with the first or second. Extra expense, the exhaustion of caring for 3, etc but for me the pros outweigh the cons in the long run.

I've been thinking lately I really want an October baby though so we might try sooner then March. Not sure yet though.

 

[hello_kitty]

HAKing - October is nice. I had my second in July and it was too hot! I like my November baby but it was a little bit rainy and cold. We had to stay in a lot. I kinda want a spring baby although if we try in April/May we will have a January/February baby.

 

[elociN]

I think the age gap of 3-5 years becomes less of an issue as they grow up. My eldest son is nearly 4 years older than his sister but now that he is 11 (soon to be 12) and she is 8 they play really well together. When they were similar age to my 2 daughters (8 and 4.5) they didn't play together as much and he used to get annoyed with her (which now happens a bit with the 8 year old when my 4.5 y.o wants to play with her or her friends). My younger 2 have 2.5 years between them and play well together (they are now 2 and 4.5). So at the moment no one is left out

 

[Missy08]

Missy, I don't have too many people with 3 that I know. A friend at work is pregnant with her 3rd now, but it was a surprise.

What do you think you'll decide on #3? Does your dh have an opinion/thoughts either way to make help you decide?

For me it's a no brainier, though I do feel more nervous about it then I did with the first or second. Extra expense, the exhaustion of caring for 3, etc but for me the pros outweigh the cons in the long run.

I've been thinking lately I really want an October baby though so we might try sooner then March. Not sure yet though.

I'm not sure what we'll decide, we are both very torn on we want...some days we know we want to try for a 3rd and other days we think, "no way!". I almost wish it would happen by accident so we didn't have to decide. One of the biggest reasons we waited longer to try for #2 was because of daycare expenses and now that I run an in-home daycare, that isn't an issue anymore. And it would be really nice to be able to stay home from day 1 with this baby. Two of the kids would have to share a room...We bought a 4 bedroom house, but the 4th bedroom is in the lower level where we have the daycare now....UGH! I don't know!!

 

[ttc126]

Ladies, big update here... my dh wants to start ttc this month! On one hand, I would love another child! On the other, I don't think I'm quite ready! So hard to decide!!!!!! I don't want to say no and have dh change his mind later when I AM ready! But I don't want to put my health in jeopardy by getting pg so soon after my c section......

Thoughts?

 

[hello_kitty]

Ladies, big update here... my dh wants to start ttc this month! On one hand, I would love another child! On the other, I don't think I'm quite ready! So hard to decide!!!!!! I don't want to say no and have dh change his mind later when I AM ready! But I don't want to put my health in jeopardy by getting pg so soon after my c section......

Thoughts?

Thats really nice that your husband wants to try but since you asked for my opinion I'm just gonna be honest. If it were me and if my health was in jeopardy, I really wouldnt risk it. Its just a matter of waiting a few months that could potentially minimize your risk. That baby is going to come sooner or later, whats another few months? I would wait, but thats just me...

My SIL had a c-section and I think there were some complications and the doctor wanted her to wait 3 years before even trying. Age is kinda a factor for her since she is 32 already, but she is pretty firm on waiting.

 

[Missy08]

I agree with waiting. I would wait until the doctor says it's ok to try. Especially if it's only a few months.

 

[Missy08]

How long does the doctor suggest waiting before you start TTC? Are you on BC? I was thinking maybe "kind of" move forward with trying if the doctor says it's ok soon...Meaning, go ahead and get off the BC and let your cycles get regular again, start taking prenatal vitamins, etc...? With my 2nd, my midwife recommended I take prenatals for 3 months before we officially started trying....Not exactly TTC, but getting ready anyway..

 

[ttc126]

Thank you ladies It was a very straightforward c section and went perfectly! My dr said it really wouldn't be a big deal as long as we waited at least 6 months. I just have read other articles that say wait until your next delivery would be at least 2 years from c section.... my dr would actually be fine with it at this point. My little guy will be 9 months this week I think for me, I feel like I do need to get my vitamin stores back up so I really like the idea of taking vitamins for a few months first. Maybe also finishing out breastfeeding...which I plan to wean at a year anyway. I don't know why I'm apprehensive. But like you all say, waiting a couple extra months can't make too big of a difference I'm not on birth control...just condoms. I'm also having very regular cycles!

 

[Missy08]

Thank you ladies It was a very straightforward c section and went perfectly! My dr said it really wouldn't be a big deal as long as we waited at least 6 months. I just have read other articles that say wait until your next delivery would be at least 2 years from c section.... my dr would actually be fine with it at this point. My little guy will be 9 months this week I think for me, I feel like I do need to get my vitamin stores back up so I really like the idea of taking vitamins for a few months first. Maybe also finishing out breastfeeding...which I plan to wean at a year anyway. I don't know why I'm apprehensive. But like you all say, waiting a couple extra months can't make too big of a difference I'm not on birth control...just condoms. I'm also having very regular cycles!

That sounds good!

I understand the apprehensive feeling...I've been having that as well. For whatever reason I feel like I need to make the decision about whether or not to have a 3rd NOW. I've been trying to tell myself today that I need to focus on my daycare (just opened a few months ago) and really getting some extra money put aside and getting everything as in order as possible and then decide. Maybe I feel rushed since I'm getting older (almost 30) and know I only have a few years left where I would consider it an option...

 

[hello_kitty]

Count me in with the apprehensive feeling. We wont even consider trying for at least another 6-7 months and there are days where I literally drive myself crazy whether or not I should ttc by that time or wait another couple of years. Its simple really, either act on it or pass when the time comes but I dont know why I keep doing this to myself. There are many other things I should focus on at this point, such as doing hw.

ttc126 - if your doctor thinks its ok, I wouldnt worry too much. Sometimes all the articles do is scare you.

 

[ttc126]

I'm glad I'm not the only apprehensive one! I hope you both are able to know the right decision once the time comes