Kiki1993
Well-Known Member
- Joined
- Jun 16, 2011
- Messages
- 2,451
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Hi I just wanna write all my feelings to be honest, just to get it all out. We have been together for about 6 and a half years, our wedding is booked, we are trying to save for a mortgage and we are getting a new car on finance soon because our car is unreliable. Anyway we have been waiting for so long and i use to be so happy for friends when they tell me they're pregnant but for the last like 4 people I have been, and i know it's pathetic of me, but jealous. I find myself thinking, "you've been together for 5 months" or "you still live at home" or "you're younger than me" .. dont get on at me I do not I'm out of order and I don't say anything, but after more than 4 years waiting I have gotten fed up. I know I am waiting for good reasons, I know we will be so mch happier and relaxed being pregnant once we have the mortgage instead of renting, once we get married and stuff but seeing all my friends that are having babies now makes me just want to cry because i want one so badly. They are in worse situations/positions than me but they seem happy and pregnant now and that's what i want... everything i'm doing now is so we can have a baby. I only want to buy to give my child a nicer home and more security, i want to marry my other half but i would gladly get married after baby is here ... just one of those days i think.
P.S i do realise i probably sound bitter, petty, childish etc I am aware! I just need to get this out of my head without seeming like a crazy bitch to the people i know in real life
I mean i'm 22 but in my past jobs i have become friends with younger people, older people and people with different lifestyles etc, one student from my last work is 18 and pregnant and happy, ex colleague who is my age but lives at home is pregnant, a friend from college is pregnant and she is debating her options and it makes me so sad because i would do anything to be in the position to be trying right now.
P.S i do realise i probably sound bitter, petty, childish etc I am aware! I just need to get this out of my head without seeming like a crazy bitch to the people i know in real life
I mean i'm 22 but in my past jobs i have become friends with younger people, older people and people with different lifestyles etc, one student from my last work is 18 and pregnant and happy, ex colleague who is my age but lives at home is pregnant, a friend from college is pregnant and she is debating her options and it makes me so sad because i would do anything to be in the position to be trying right now.