Welcome to 'Trying To Conceive Over 35'

Babywhisperer its too soon to tell is my opinion. only 8dpo.

Can't one of you put me into a coma for every tww and just wake me when I'm 1 day late? :haha: I agree it's too early. If the witch stays away I will be testing on Sat, cd28 and I will be 12dpo...I hope she stays away this time!

How are you doing?
 
Hello Ladies, I hope this finds you all well. There are so many regulars on now, you'll forgive me if I don't address you all individually! I do read all the posts and following your journeys is keeping me sane!

AFM:

So My FIL came to town yesterday, with 2 of DH's sisters and their husbands (all of whom live out of town). They took DH to lunch yesterday to ask him what was going on and where we were in the relationship and how could they support him in what was happening. While I appreciate their concern, I think they really have no idea what living with someone who is a gambling addict (with other addictions such as porn thrown in, for example) is like. My FIL stayed with us last night and will be here again tonight, and last night DH and I had to sit through a 3-4 hour lecture about how we shouldn't yell at each other, never go to bed angry etc.... all good advice for regular couples, but put too much of the onus on me to 'bite my tongue' if I was feeling upset.
I recognize that they are his family, and will, of course, fall on his side. I don't mind that, it wouldn't be right if that weren't the case, but while FIL was 'chatting' with us, I felt my DH could have jumped in a little more with some clarifying comments. The family has this idea that since I was a single mom when I met my DH, that I saw someone who earned a good income and latched onto the "security" of that when I married him. I'm sitting there thinking WTF? DH begged me to marry him! DH insisted we get married! I wasn't in love with the idea, I was fine having a baby without being married as I figured we could marry anytime (especially since I was older, it's easier to be preggers without a ring on your finger) and because we were having communication issues I wasn't in any rush to walk down the aisle. DH can be very charming when he wants to, and he was the one who was pushing the "we have to be married to have a baby" angle and the "if we are married, you will be protected i.e.: regarding his pension, benefits etc".... I was never concerned about THOSE things....
When I talk about wanting security, it's things like stability and living in the same house for my children. I moved a lot when I was young, and it's important to me that my kids have a different experience. That means protecting the home, making sure the rent or mortgage gets paid, that sort of thing.
I had to have a few words with DH after my FIL went to bed, and pointed out that when his dad said that bit about me, that he should have jumped in and clarified that point. No wonder his family think I'm a gold digger! His dad says he knows I'm not, but they definitely have this idea that I've somehow trapped DH, or coerced him into marrying me and it's just not the case.... but whatever.... I think they just don't understand what his behaviour has actually been, and since they don't live close, I'm not going to worry about it.
DH came home after our month apart (though we talked to each other all the time, and saw each other regularly etc) and I was nervous about what it was going to be like.... but I think it might be better now, so I'm hopeful things will continue to move forward.
fingers crossed!

So enough of my ranting... how is everyone feeling today?
Coy, I hate to say it, but I don't think you are going to pop until next week sometime! My guess is for 39 weeks on the dot!

Ali, how are you feeling?
Jess, TerriLou, Angel, Twotogo?
How is everyone???
 
Oh, and just FYI: It's supposed to SNOW here in Calgary!!! thought you'd all get a kick out of that one!

(it won't last, and it's not really that cold..... but SNOW!)
 
Oh, and just FYI: It's supposed to SNOW here in Calgary!!! thought you'd all get a kick out of that one!

(it won't last, and it's not really that cold..... but SNOW!)

Holy crap. The again it's been snowing in Tahoe and Colorado. Last year we went to the beach the 2nd week in Oct, then it snowed on Halloween. Bizarro.
 
Hi Everyone..

So sorry for the delay.. I was caught talking with the Dr, and then the nurse and it took like an hour, then I had to call my mom, and ahhh.. its been crazy busy here since I found out just after 3.

So it was a BFN :bfn: The Dr called me himself to tell me the news. So that is kinda sad. I'm surprisingly OK though. I knew it would be negative.

So then the nurse called me a few minutes later and she wanted to tell me that they were changing the protocol. So we had to discuss that. This one I will be on BCP (birth control pills) then a drug called Lupron for 10 -14 days, then we will stim for 10 and then poof I will have eggs. So the whole process takes like a month or 2. So I think they want me to start the BCP like this month? IDK. I have an Appt with the Dr tomorrow at 11:30 to discuss. I also am hoping for a bigger discount on the costs. She mentioned that with this protocol I will be able to get the drugs 1/2 price from the company in England, so that is a huge help (like 2500 instead of 5000). So if they discount their fees and with that discount, and they owe me some money because they didn't do the hatching ($550), it will be cheaper next time. We will discuss the price of it all tomorrow as well.

Sorry again for keeping you in suspense, I just didn't have the opportunity to get on bnb!

:hug: to all of you who were anxiously waiting! Thanks for being there for me through all of this!!!!


:hugs::hugs::hugs::hugs::hugs::hugs::hugs::hugs::hugs::hugs::hug::hug::hug::hug::hug:


I think that's all I need to say. I know you'll get your rainbow Ali, looks like you and I are just having our hurdles in different ways :growlmad: Bah humbug :growlmad::growlmad:
 
Hi ladies, I am changing my rant (is that permissable? :haha:) as I am ashamed I posted it lol! Crap stuff this morning but I am over it now :blush: lol!
 
P.S. Good morning ladies :blush: Sorry I had to post such a crappy note first thing this morning. I'm gonna go have coffee :cloud9: and prioritize. I'll be back and better soon! :thumbup:
 
:( I'm so sorry you are having to deal with that. Sometimes that munch bug :munch: can sneak in and it doesn't matter what you are SUPPOSED to do, you end up doing what you WANT to do...no matter how wrong it is. :( I'm not defending your DH :nope:...I just know how it is...sometimes I get that way during the dieting process of competition. Well, I guess he will just have to do the chores (:laundry::iron::dishes:) for a while after babes is born! He wont have a choice. You just sit back and relax and MILK it (both ways...nursing too! :haha:)
 
O my hell, I am steamed this morning! So I go out yesterday and I spend a freaking mint on enough pre-made type breakfasts to last just maybe 2 days for after babes is born--so I don't have to bust my a$$ cooking, right?? I bag it tight, wrap it, and write on it "for after the baby is born" and tied it tightly. Well I spoke to dh about it and said "this is not for snacking- this is for after babes is born so I won't have to jump so high every morning". And he agreed it was a good idea. Well, this morning I get up and he has already started it! He ripped the bag to shreds in the freezer and started eating those meals already. I am not against anyone eating of they are hungry but these were expressly set aside :( and there are alternatives to eat. And not for the baby for crying out loud, to make my life somewhat more easy for a day or two :growlmad: So I am upset. I re-bagged it, listed it POST LABOR and tied it.
If it gets ripped open again I am going to take what is left and return it to the store. Period.
I can't spend that kind of money on simple snacking, it had a much bigger purpose. So anyway I woke up bright and happy but I am now very much p'd off this morning just for the lack of thought, caring, consideration, etc. *sigh.* So is dh going to fix my f'ing food after I spend hours in excruciating pain, agony, and literally pints of blood and sweat to produce a child? Nope. Plus, everyone is hungry so I had to fix breakfast ANYWAYS! WTF is that?!

If that were me, there would have been murder. I would have told him to replace what he took...someone has it too good. What part of "This is for post labor" did he not understand? What it done in spite? Why else would he ignore what you said?

I had to have another conversation w/ dh last night about his behaving badly last week. I asked him if he'd be disappointed if af shows and he said yes. I said well, I was disappointed when on my O day you were passed out from drinking on the golf course by 8pm. So if it doesn't happen, your behavior is partly to blame...it does take 2 ya jerk. He was annoyed as he hates when I point out when he's wrong, but he also drove home. I told him I've seen how this movie ends...dwi, or accident where you get hurt or you hurt someone else. Why jeopardize your life and future like that? After a couple of drinks his good judgment is MIA. Too bad if he doesn't want to hear it, it's my life too. If he gets a dwi he will lose his job and never forgive himself for something that was 100% avoidable. Ugh he can be so stubborn sometimes.
 
LOL! Thanks ladies! I'm not mad anymore, just needed to cool off and put the little things in perspective. Not such a huge deal really, he just has to understand that I'm not going to be up and available for fast family action for a few days so he's going to have to handle it- whatever it is. We did talk briefly about it. And I should add that he's actually an awesome dh-- very analytical, a great protector, etc, and he has a lot on his plate to deal with I think the biggest struggle I perosnally have is getting him to realize that even though he has the disability and has to fight that daily 24/7-- I can only do so much and I can't do it all. He has been doing more since I've hit the later stages of pregnancy I just had to rant today and probably shouldn't have :blush: and am slightly ashamed of myself now for having done so :rofl: There are so many BIGGER problems in the world iykwim. I am so thankful God has provided for us like He has and I shouldn't say anything negative about a family member divulging ina portion of it. Dh may just have to skip breakfast for one day or cook it himself :shrug: No big deal.

Baby- glad you had a talk with your dh about the fun weekend stuff- best he keep it under control to prevent the worst from happening! :thumbup:

Jess- yes, you are right, a munch bag is hard to resist, I should know! :haha: It's my own fault for trying to be prepared and leaving stuff available :growlmad: Oh wells, right? :haha: No biggy....like I said I am ashamed of myself for ranting !! :haha:
 
Coy...don't ever be ashamed for ranting...venting...we ALL need to do that every once in a while!
BTW, if it's not too personal, what is his disability? You mentioned he is a Marine. Is it associated with being a Marine? Just curious.
 
Coy...don't ever be ashamed for ranting...venting...we ALL need to do that every once in a while!
BTW, if it's not too personal, what is his disability? You mentioned he is a Marine. Is it associated with being a Marine? Just curious.

Jess-
Yes, his disability is associated with his military work...he was involved in many things for the military and some of it is very discreet iykwim, but he gained a huge injury from military involvment years ago that led to another injury that led to the disability he has now. Plus the treatments he underwent for the first few injuries the medicines gave him diabetes and cancer- both of which has beaten his body to the point where doctors are saying he can't get better. He had 4th stage non-Hodgkins lymphoma also and doc said he'd live only for two weeks- but God healed him! The doctor admitted it was amiracle as the tumors (spread thorughout his brain, heart, and body) were inoperable. He was paralyzed from the waist down and his entire left side for a long time but he fought it hard and managed into a wheel chair, then on to a cain, now without the cane he can walk but with extreme pain always. The nerves in his legs and arms have been stripped of their sheath so he's in extreme pain there all the time too. He actually died once on the table at the hospital and they had to revive him :shock: Plus, as if that isn't enough, during his military service there were 3 men that pull knives on him...he was split from his left side all the way across (and through) his stocmache to the right side twice! He went all military mode on them of course and they ended up looking like something out of a terminator movie! :rofl: The one guy his arms were only left attached by some skin (sorry, tmi) ...my dh went all Bruce Willis on them and simply returned and sewed himself up! His intestines were coming out :sick: and he had to sew innner and outer layers of tissue :sick: Anyway, my dh is one of the toughest men I have ever met and he's been through hell and back physically. His disability sort of consists of a combination of all of that together...but was intially caused from injuries gained through service yeah. WOW! Long answer- sorry! :blush: lol

My dh...he has an awesome looking torso btw :cloud9: my hero! :), besides being very muscular with a gorgeous chest (ahem) is all criss-crossed with scars and did I mention he has been shot about 3-4 times close range? Yeah. That too :roll:
 
Baby- are you sure it's AF coming? Your temp dipped a tiny bit but is still nice and high and there are variables that can affect it minimally...personally I don't think your chart is saying AF at all at this point- usually it will drop a full degree or more when that happens. And no, I cannot put you in a coma for the 2WW! :growlmad: You have to agonize with the rest of us! :rofl:

TwoToGo- I hate itchy boobs! :growlmad: :rofl: Mine have been like that forEVER! :haha: Aaargh! Btw I think it's awesome your community has a home school sports! My little girl would love that she is into all kinds of sports but this town is so freaking prejudice...She tells me "too bad they won't let me play just 'cause I'm a girl!" Nuts! Crazy town, I am going to keep looking though. There aren't too many homeschooled kids in the immediate are so hard to get things started.

Ali- wow, I am glad you are flying! I think I posted that question last night actually, I kept thinking time wise it'd be so much simpler :thumbup: And no $550 is a good deal! I used to travel a lot before getting married and it can be darned expensive!

Phil- wow, I hate visits like that! Like putting you under a spotlight and making you look and feel as though you are the one to blame for it all. That is not the case, I know that. And yeah- your dh really sure have stepped up and said "look, we both wanted to get married and having a baby was a choice we both made". Here's the deal though- your FIL made it easy for your dh to view this whole situation from a different perspective, from a perspective that says he does not have to take responsibility again. For someone who has the weakness to give in to personal self-assuaging addictions like porn and gambling it is an easy strike. Really, in my opinion- and it's just mine :shrug:- I think the two of you can handle it. If your dh doesn't see the wrong of what he's done now then he never will no matter who is there to spell it out for him. And you shouldn't be made to suffer through his self-inflicted punishments like guilt, financial burdens, etc. So I think it's best to just follow your heart and do what feels right no matter how his FIL tries to make you out to be the "inflictor" or "punisher" he may feel obligated to protect his son, and I can understand that, but baby boy is a grown man now! :hugs: Wow, so much for you to deal with when you should just be focusing on yourself, your health, and that bright new life ready to enter the world! :hug: And thanks for the due date prediction! :thumbup: I am hoping she comes sooner than that but if not 39 weeks is just a few days away! :haha:
 
Coy...don't ever be ashamed for ranting...venting...we ALL need to do that every once in a while!
BTW, if it's not too personal, what is his disability? You mentioned he is a Marine. Is it associated with being a Marine? Just curious.

Jess-
Yes, his disability is associated with his military work...he was involved in many things for the military and some of it is very discreet iykwim, but he gained a huge injury from military involvment years ago that led to another injury that led to the disability he has now. Plus the treatments he underwent for the first few injuries the medicines gave him diabetes and cancer- both of which has beaten his body to the point where doctors are saying he can't get better. He had 4th stage non-Hodgkins lymphoma also and doc said he'd live only for two weeks- but God healed him! The doctor admitted it was amiracle as the tumors (spread thorughout his brain, heart, and body) were inoperable. He was paralyzed from the waist down and his entire left side for a long time but he fought it hard and managed into a wheel chair, then on to a cain, now without the cane he can walk but with extreme pain always. The nerves in his legs and arms have been stripped of their sheath so he's in extreme pain there all the time too. He actually died once on the table at the hospital and they had to revive him :shock: Plus, as if that isn't enough, during his military service there were 3 men that pull knives on him...he was split from his left side all the way across (and through) his stocmache to the right side twice! He went all military mode on them of course and they ended up looking like something out of a terminator movie! :rofl: The one guy his arms were only left attached by some skin (sorry, tmi) ...my dh went all Bruce Willis on them and simply returned and sewed himself up! His intestines were coming out :sick: and he had to sew innner and outer layers of tissue :sick: Anyway, my dh is one of the toughest men I have ever met and he's been through hell and back physically. His disability sort of consists of a combination of all of that together...but was intially caused from injuries gained through service yeah. WOW! Long answer- sorry! :blush: lol

My dh...he has an awesome looking torso btw :cloud9: my hero! :), besides being very muscular with a gorgeous chest (ahem) is all criss-crossed with scars and did I mention he has been shot about 3-4 times close range? Yeah. That too :roll:

:shock:

Ummm...let him have the snack sack...
 
Coy...don't ever be ashamed for ranting...venting...we ALL need to do that every once in a while!
BTW, if it's not too personal, what is his disability? You mentioned he is a Marine. Is it associated with being a Marine? Just curious.

Jess-
Yes, his disability is associated with his military work...he was involved in many things for the military and some of it is very discreet iykwim, but he gained a huge injury from military involvment years ago that led to another injury that led to the disability he has now. Plus the treatments he underwent for the first few injuries the medicines gave him diabetes and cancer- both of which has beaten his body to the point where doctors are saying he can't get better. He had 4th stage non-Hodgkins lymphoma also and doc said he'd live only for two weeks- but God healed him! The doctor admitted it was amiracle as the tumors (spread thorughout his brain, heart, and body) were inoperable. He was paralyzed from the waist down and his entire left side for a long time but he fought it hard and managed into a wheel chair, then on to a cain, now without the cane he can walk but with extreme pain always. The nerves in his legs and arms have been stripped of their sheath so he's in extreme pain there all the time too. He actually died once on the table at the hospital and they had to revive him :shock: Plus, as if that isn't enough, during his military service there were 3 men that pull knives on him...he was split from his left side all the way across (and through) his stocmache to the right side twice! He went all military mode on them of course and they ended up looking like something out of a terminator movie! :rofl: The one guy his arms were only left attached by some skin (sorry, tmi) ...my dh went all Bruce Willis on them and simply returned and sewed himself up! His intestines were coming out :sick: and he had to sew innner and outer layers of tissue :sick: Anyway, my dh is one of the toughest men I have ever met and he's been through hell and back physically. His disability sort of consists of a combination of all of that together...but was intially caused from injuries gained through service yeah. WOW! Long answer- sorry! :blush: lol

My dh...he has an awesome looking torso btw :cloud9: my hero! :), besides being very muscular with a gorgeous chest (ahem) is all criss-crossed with scars and did I mention he has been shot about 3-4 times close range? Yeah. That too :roll:

Holy bananas. Talk about 9 lives! My ex had non-hodg lymphoma in his pelvis...ironic b/c he found it at my urging to see a dr when we broke up due to him cheating on me. Hmmm. He caught it in time thankfully. There should be a movie after your husband!! Seriously. And don't apologize for venting here, that's what we are here for. Us women need a place we can come and vent, have support, and not have people think less of us or our dh's. If I told my friends half of the stuff I say on here they would be concerned and rush to judgment.

I know I sould like a broken record, but has he tried acupuncture for pain?
 
Baby- are you sure it's AF coming? Your temp dipped a tiny bit but is still nice and high and there are variables that can affect it minimally...personally I don't think your chart is saying AF at all at this point- usually it will drop a full degree or more when that happens. And no, I cannot put you in a coma for the 2WW! :growlmad: You have to agonize with the rest of us! :rofl:

TwoToGo- I hate itchy boobs! :growlmad: :rofl: Mine have been like that forEVER! :haha: Aaargh! Btw I think it's awesome your community has a home school sports! My little girl would love that she is into all kinds of sports but this town is so freaking prejudice...She tells me "too bad they won't let me play just 'cause I'm a girl!" Nuts! Crazy town, I am going to keep looking though. There aren't too many homeschooled kids in the immediate are so hard to get things started.

Ali- wow, I am glad you are flying! I think I posted that question last night actually, I kept thinking time wise it'd be so much simpler :thumbup: And no $550 is a good deal! I used to travel a lot before getting married and it can be darned expensive!

Phil- wow, I hate visits like that! Like putting you under a spotlight and making you look and feel as though you are the one to blame for it all. That is not the case, I know that. And yeah- your dh really sure have stepped up and said "look, we both wanted to get married and having a baby was a choice we both made". Here's the deal though- your FIL made it easy for your dh to view this whole situation from a different perspective, from a perspective that says he does not have to take responsibility again. For someone who has the weakness to give in to personal self-assuaging addictions like porn and gambling it is an easy strike. Really, in my opinion- and it's just mine :shrug:- I think the two of you can handle it. If your dh doesn't see the wrong of what he's done now then he never will no matter who is there to spell it out for him. And you shouldn't be made to suffer through his self-inflicted punishments like guilt, financial burdens, etc. So I think it's best to just follow your heart and do what feels right no matter how his FIL tries to make you out to be the "inflictor" or "punisher" he may feel obligated to protect his son, and I can understand that, but baby boy is a grown man now! :hugs: Wow, so much for you to deal with when you should just be focusing on yourself, your health, and that bright new life ready to enter the world! :hug: And thanks for the due date prediction! :thumbup: I am hoping she comes sooner than that but if not 39 weeks is just a few days away! :haha:

I'm not sure of anything, but I hate this waiting and I'm only 8dpo but really not feeling like anything. I was all stressy & anxious yesterday as I sometimes get 1-2 days before af, and I just cleaned my desk at work and cleared out my wallet of old receipts which sounds like the cleaning/organizing I do right before af. We'll see what the next few days hold. I still think putting me into a coma will not only help me, but all of you as I will be an anxious nut until I know either way. Yeah, patience isn't my strong suit.
 
Hi ladies, lol, I know right?! My dh has been through a lot, and seriously-- a movie could be made! :huh: His body is a mess of battle scars, plus as an Oglala Lakota Sioux he performed the sundance 10 times (ten years in a row) which is a traditional practice of piercing the chest (and sometimes back) with either eagle bones or sharpened antlers, raw hide is inserted through the open wounds and the man is suspended fromt he rawhide hanging on a tree until his skin brakes :sick: . This can take days for the skin to brake :shrug: Anyway after God healed him from his cancer he did this 10 years in a row so his chest and back is also covered in those scars...Has anyone seen the old movie "A Man Called Horse?" They performed a similar ceremony in that. This ceremony is performed after a period of like 10 days fasting. So yeah, he's been through a lot which is why I feel chidlish complaining! :haha:
 
Baby- lo, a coma? Will that help? Yes it would! Just to go deep sleep until 2WW is over would be awesome! All ttc women should be given that! It is so hard to tell, there are no absolutes in symptom spotting that couldn't possibly be attributed to something else always :growlmad: which is the worst part in my book. *sigh* Go ahead and go an anxious nut! :haha:

Oh yeah, acupuncture...yep, he's tried it. Now he uses a combination of meds (which he has seriously reduced despite his doctor's protests) and meditation. He learned meditation through the martial arts and says that helps some.
 
Baby- lo, a coma? Will that help? Yes it would! Just to go deep sleep until 2WW is over would be awesome! All ttc women should be given that! It is so hard to tell, there are no absolutes in symptom spotting that couldn't possibly be attributed to something else always :growlmad: which is the worst part in my book. *sigh* Go ahead and go an anxious nut! :haha:

Oh yeah, acupuncture...yep, he's tried it. Now he uses a combination of meds (which he has seriously reduced despite his doctor's protests) and meditation. He learned meditation through the martial arts and says that helps some.

Sounds like he's made of iron. Well I know people who have tried acupuncture and were unsuccessful, but actually had success with epidurals. Living in pain must be so draining.

So let's think of an all natural/non potential baby harming way to be put into a trance for 2 weeks. Normally I'd say margaritas, but that wouldn't be healthy.

I wish I had the patience to learn how to meditate :haha: Tomorrow is Wed and should be an easy day and I am aiming for 1/2 of Thursday off and all of Friday with maybe just a meeting if I can't schedule it Thursday.. Oh witch, please stay far away, we will reconvene in a year or so!
 

Users who are viewing this thread

Members online

Forum statistics

Threads
1,650,439
Messages
27,150,914
Members
255,856
Latest member
duefeb2026
Back
Top
monitoring_string = "c48fb0faa520c8dfff8c4deab485d3d2"