What a immature inconsiderate *******!!!

[Lydiarose]

My twat of a OH has just come in from "working late" stoned out of his face after being out and not even telling me with his silly little mates weve just moved into our new house i cooked his tea presuming he was working late i feel like such a idiot i am so pissed off its unreal,
after ive spent all day cleaning and sorting the house out and he knows how tierd i am at the moment,
ive also got huge problems with cannabis because it caused me a great deal of problems as a teenager - i had a very bad reaction to it but in his stupid eyes its gods gift,hes 23 and i am sick to death of him acting lke hes 16 years and giving in to his friends every need,

ive told him to fuck off and stay out of my way but i am really pissed off about this what do i do???? im sittig here crying my eyes out.

 

[gemabee]

under the influence of drugs around a child, on top of abusin drugs whilst havin parental responsibility... errrr... kick him the hell out.

 

[CharlieKeys]

The thing he needs to remember is he's a father now..... and you can't act like that when you have a baby around! He needs to realise he needs to grow up or eventually he'll lose his family!

 

[mommy2lilmen]

I am sorry. People can be inconsiderate, male or female. We all do things that are just spite or spur of moment or what not. I am sorry your so mad. Take some time to calm down then have a talk with him and hopefully he wil see what it has done to you.
Take care.
PS, I have had and do have my fair share of inconsiderance. I lived with a man for 12 years that was a male pig! Its upsetting I loose my temper, thats our human way of dealing with things. I do find that talking relieves it, now whether its heard and comprehended is another story.

 

[xemmax]

what gemabee said.

sounds like a prize tool!

 

[mommy2lilmen]

Its easy to say to one to kick their OH out, but it is also another place to say, have a talk and see if they could stop this sort of behaviour for the sake of the family. Ending a relationship, or kicking one out is usually not the answer to alot of things. I would take time to calm down then discuss things. IMO.

 

[vaniilla]

its hard to say without being in your situation, if I knew my OH was taking any sort of drugs let alone coming home stoned he would be out before he managed to step a foot inside the house, I would lay down the law, don't let him think he can get away with it, wait until the cannabis has worn off and have a talk with him

 

[gemabee]

Its easy to say to one to kick their OH out, but it is also another place to say, have a talk and see if they could stop this sort of behaviour for the sake of the family. Ending a relationship, or kicking one out is usually not the answer to alot of things. I would take time to calm down then discuss things. IMO.

if he's under the influence of drugs she sure as hell should kick him out of the house... i never said to break up, or that she should kick him out forever... but he should not be in the house whilst stoned, not with a child there... he needs to know he's crossed the line... when he's sobered up nd realised his mistakes then they can by all means talk.
nd u can't rationally discuss things when one party is high... u can trust me on that one!

 

[MrsBandEgglet]

He is behaving very selfishly and irresponsibly. Keep your distance from him tonight and talk to him in the morning when he's in a better state. Make it clear you won't tolerate it now you have a family together. It's not fair on you and LO. Hope you're ok xx

 

[RainbowDrop_x]

under the influence of drugs around a child, on top of abusin drugs whilst havin parental responsibility... errrr... kick him the hell out.

This

 

[Lydiarose]

Thankyou for all the replys i asked him to leave the house but he refused ive told him not to speak to me he doesnt seem to see the problem at all an i quote said "im tapped" and that hes "fine and just wanted to chill after work" bollocks . . . im so fucking angry i dont know what to do i really want to shout at him hes frustrating me so much hes so thick he really is he does not see any problem what so ever can anyone help me find a way of putting things to him? what would be the best thing to say?

 

[mystika802]

Being in a similar situation years ago I dont know that there really IS anything you can say. If he doesn't see an issue with it, no matter what you say, he probably wont see it as an issue.
Maybe tell him to put himself in your shoes?? How would he feel if you did the same thing?

 

[ttc_lolly]

I agree with the other girls, I wouldn't stand for it at all and wouldn't have him around.

Just to add, to answer your current thread in GS - I don't think this is the right time if this is how his behaviour makes you feel.

 

[mrsthomas623]

What a jerk, I would definitely not be ok with him being around LO right now. Hopefully he will be more receptive of the issue when he sobers up.

ttc_lolly- People post in the GS for some privacy, maybe it should not be brought up in the public threads.

 

[gingerbaby4us]

Smoking pot in itself doesn't make someone a bad father. Plenty of attentive caring nurturing parents smoke pot. My husband smokes bud every day when he gets home and he is an excellent father. He doesn't drink and pot is his way to relax after a long day.

It can be very hard for young men to give up their vices, I know I'm married to one. But I have to remember that where I live its decriminalized and it's more socially accepted. I see people smoking outdoors in my neighborhood and when I'm downtown shopping.

 

[lanaross]

okay you're frustrated.. it's perfectly understandable. It's a hard job that we do 24/7. I've recently went back to work and I tell ya.. it looks like a party all the time (even though I work hard) comparing to caring for a baby every waking hour. Now first of all, things will be rough the first year.. on many levels.. you're tired, he's tired, you miss your independence, there is a crazy sleep deprivation, there are so many difficult things that all you want to do is change something. You shouldn't. Not the first year. We're all emotional, adjusting, it's just hard. What you can do, however, is to write down what he needs to do and leave for a day, or maybe even 4 hours, whatever you feel comfortable with. Seriously, leave. Don't make any excuses, take a break and leave him taking care of the baby without you helping. Don't call to check, don't pick up the phone unless necessary. Trust me when you come back the first thing that would come out of his mouth is wow how you do this. And this is the start, the turning point. Now you can actually speak the same language and he will understand what it's like.

 

[PepsiChic]

i know its hard, but i would tell him the honest truth, that your very angry with him right now so to stay out of the way and that he'll be sleeping ont he couch tonight while you think about whats going to happen next. if he doesnt like that option, he can take himself off to his friends house for the night so be it.

then tomorrow when you've calmed down tell him that either he kicks the habit or he leaves because you dont want your LO growing up around that kind of behavior and bad habit. Also tell him that it IS time for him to grow up and man up and be the father he should be. let him know your disappointed in him, and that your sure that if LO was older he would be too.

his behaviour is unacceptable and he needs to know he crossed the line, whether you kick him out, or have a good long OPEN and HONEST talk with him about what he did and how it makes you feel and go from there. something needs to be done, and he needs to change.

 

[RinnaRoo]

Its not like you can't function when youre on bud. That's all that I'm gonna say on this one because I got jumped on last time!

 

[Eve]

Honestly hun, my advice would be to talk things through, and listen to your heart, not women on here who do not know you, your situation, your OH or what you want. It's easy to sit and judge from the sidelines but you, and only you know what you should/shouldn't do.
I wouldn't want my OH around my daughter after he smokes a joint, and I prefer he didn't at all, but he did it when I met him, doesn't hurt anyone around him, so I don't make a fuss.... but coming home stoned out of his tree and leaving me to tend to everything wouldn't be tolerated, but that is me.
People make mistakes, we all do.

lots of to you hun, remember don't do anything in the heat of the moment, cool down and think things through

 

[Eve]

Just so you all know, a man can smoke pot occasionally and still be an exceptional father, I mean better than a lot of moms out there kind of father I don't think it's the best thing to do mind you, but it's not the end of the world and not everyone that smokes it is terrible drug addicted morons like they are made out to be.