What age gaps do you want between your kids and why?

[dgirllamius]

I wanted 2 years but unless our financial situation changes we won't have another. It could be 5 years before we consider another but money must change first.

 

[wishuwerehere]

I wanted 2 years but my daughter was not planned and we needed to wait till i 'd finished uni, had a job, oh had cleared debt etc so there will be 4 years between dd and this lo. It'll be nice in a lot of ways but if i have another after this one i want it to be 18 months - 2.5 years gap.

 

[LaDY]

I always wanted a 3 year gap however there will nearly be a 6 year gap between my son and the little one...we left it this long in order to focus on my career and progress xx

 

[HelenJane]

18- 2.5year gap aswell. Just because I think it will be nice if they are that close, they can grow up close and play together etc. But with #2 its noy turned out like that. Hopefully instead it will be more like a 3 year gap and ive come to like the idea of that gap and dont think that's too big of a gap

 

[SassyLou]

Mine are 24, almost 15, 12 and 17 months. So quite large age gaps.
DS1 is from my previous relationship, I left due to my partner being abusive. So the big gap between DS1 & DS2 is down to not having a decent man lol!
Then met DH and had DSs 2 & 3, there's 27 months between them.
We didnt intend to have anymore but in 2010 DH forgot to pull out and I ended up pregnant ( DSs were 21, 11 & 9), sadly I miscarried, we tried again and sadly lost our angel Archie. We decided to try again and got our gorgeous raindow (when she was born DH was 48, I was 40, DS1 was 22, DS2 was 13 and DS3 was 11).
We've had a few rude/intrusive comments/questions. It was quite common when I was having her for doctors to ask (when they'd seen my pregnancy history) to ask if she was DHs first (clearly had to be a new relationship). We just tell people she's our midlife crisis, we realised our children were growing up and we'd have to speak to each other, it was either a baby or a sports car so we opted for a baby. It shuts people up
She is by far the best thing that could have happened to our family, we all adore her, her big brothers worship her and will do anything for her.
Sorry for the essay about our family with hig age gaps.

 

[Eleanor ace]

Mine are 24, almost 15, 12 and 17 months. So quite large age gaps.
DS1 is from my previous relationship, I left due to my partner being abusive. So the big gap between DS1 & DS2 is down to not having a decent man lol!
Then met DH and had DSs 2 & 3, there's 27 months between them.
We didnt intend to have anymore but in 2010 DH forgot to pull out and I ended up pregnant ( DSs were 21, 11 & 9), sadly I miscarried, we tried again and sadly lost our angel Archie. We decided to try again and got our gorgeous raindow (when she was born DH was 48, I was 40, DS1 was 22, DS2 was 13 and DS3 was 11).
We've had a few rude/intrusive comments/questions. It was quite common when I was having her for doctors to ask (when they'd seen my pregnancy history) to ask if she was DHs first (clearly had to be a new relationship). We just tell people she's our midlife crisis, we realised our children were growing up and we'd have to speak to each other, it was either a baby or a sports car so we opted for a baby. It shuts people up
She is by far the best thing that could have happened to our family, we all adore her, her big brothers worship her and will do anything for her.
Sorry for the essay about our family with hig age gaps.

I love that! . She's one lucky little girl, lots of big brothers to spoil and love her!

 

[HelenJane]

Aww yes it makes me feel even better about bigger ages gaps when I hear things like that. I'd love a little boy one day too

 

[phoenix333]

I wanted an age gap of around 2 years. There are 12 years between me and my brother and although we get on fantastically well, I always wished for a sibling while I was growing up. I really wanted my children to be closer together so they could be playmates for each other. I was also looking forward to getting all the "babyness" out of the way in one go. I told OH I wanted to start trying in August but little did I know, when I said that I was already pregnant

We will have an age gap of 18 months which to me (at the minute, at least) seems perfect x

 

[baby09]

Our girls are 20 months apart which I love. We were going to try for number 3 when Lovella was 2 but that's been and gone I just got a good job so think we'll wait a bit. I am very broody tho house is going on the market in the new year so hopefully a quick sale, get a 3 bed house and try for number 3

 

[Mummy Bean]

if this one turns up this week then there will be exactly 18 months between them.

We only want two, so I felt having them close together so they can go through life together at roughly the same pace. It made financial sense as I am 26 and would like to really work on my career one day, so this means I have done on all my time off. Also my employer was offering voluntary redundancies which I got - so got paid a little sum, also it came with a retraining grant so I can have time of with my kids and then retrain for when I am ready to return. Also the house we bought is a doer upper - so the sooner I am back in full time work we can set out sights on the big forever home.

Both sets of parents are around and they both often help out with childcare - but both of them want to retire in a few years and move away - so using there services whilst there around. lol

I spose I have the image of family outings/holidays and stuff and it will be easier to do if there similar age then if we had say a 5 year old and a newborn.

None of friends/family have kids - so hoping in providing Parker with a brother he will have a constant play mate (enemy).

I am sure there will be lots of difficulties but lots of joys no matter what age gap you go for.

 

[youngone]

To me personally it's very important for them to be very close in age. This is simply because of my experience though.

My siblings are 3.5, 6 and 10 apart from me, and I could never really have a relationship with them. The oldest- 10 year gap- I barely know, since he moved out before I could remember anything, then got married etc. He was at the age where he didn't want to hang around family, but do his own thing.

I always craved a close sibling relationship- and it was especially difficult when I had depression because I was all alone, and it could've ended so badly.

Something to really take into consideration with age gaps is not just the age but the maturity that comes with age difference. For example, there is a huge maturity gap between 13 and 16, or 16 and 19... so if you think your kids might be closer as they get older and not fight so much (they they probably do as kids) then that might not even be the case. I couldn't get along with any of my siblings until we were both more mature at at the same stage (20's). IYKWIM.

But I understand nothing turns out as planned and sometimes having them close in age isn't an option. I think closeness to siblings is heavily dependent on two factors- parenting and each child's personality/nature.

 

[ellismum]

None because were only having one!