What is the proper way to thank someone for a baby gift they know you returned?

[jennifer.lee]

To sum up a long story, my mother-in-law is one of those people who always does what SHE wants no matter what. She knew we had a car seat/stroller travel system on our registry that we really wanted, and she even clearly stated she checked it out on the registry. Yet she went and bought a different one that she liked better in the long run. I ended up getting that one PLUS the one I really wanted, so we decided to exchange the one from my mother-in-law.

My husband called her to ask if she still had the receipt and explained the reason we needed to exchange it. Of course she got REALLY offended, which seemed unnecessary to us, but we simply don't need two travel systems at this point. We really needed to exchange it and get many necessities that we still need and don't have. No use having two travel systems when we need so much more. She told him on the phone that she saw the one we picked out but didn't like it and wanted to get this one instead.

So keeping in mind she got really offended, what is the proper way to write her thank you note, since she knows we returned the gift? When I say 'offended', I mean her daughters (who are married with children themselves) were even posting messages on Facebook about us being ungrateful and rude, etc., etc. >_<

 

[makemeamammy]

WHAT??!! What did she want you to do? Walk around with 2 prams?! Your MIL sounds completely ridiculous! I would say 'thank you so much for your kind gift' and leave it at that x

 

[adrie]

To sum up a long story, my mother-in-law is one of those people who always does what SHE wants no matter what. She knew we had a car seat/stroller travel system on our registry that we really wanted, and she even clearly stated she checked it out on the registry. Yet she went and bought a different one that she liked better in the long run. I ended up getting that one PLUS the one I really wanted, so we decided to exchange the one from my mother-in-law.

My husband called her to ask if she still had the receipt and explained the reason we needed to exchange it. Of course she got REALLY offended, which seemed unnecessary to us, but we simply don't need two travel systems at this point. We really needed to exchange it and get many necessities that we still need and don't have. No use having two travel systems when we need so much more. She told him on the phone that she saw the one we picked out but didn't like it and wanted to get this one instead.

So keeping in mind she got really offended, what is the proper way to write her thank you note, since she knows we returned the gift? When I say 'offended', I mean her daughters (who are married with children themselves) were even posting messages on Facebook about us being ungrateful and rude, etc., etc. >_<

Why would someone do that? That just seems so petty and unnecessary, truly.

I am not sure there is anything left to say? Simply thanks, but we have our travel system. If she doesn't provide the receipt, I would sell it for next to new, offer to deliver it to the buyer, etc. Good luck.

 

[Cccbb61013]

I wouldn't even send one. If someone selfishly buys you something & then causes you stress about it, does that really deserve a thank you? No. If it was somebody else, I probably still would. But since it's a MIL, I wouldn't & I'd let DH deal with her bratiness.

 

[+tivethoughts]

I agree with cccbb - not being funny, but she saw the one u chose and decided SHE didnt like it so chose one she did? Rude.

Anyway, I'd not bother with a thank you note personally. However, if you want to....then just a simple "thank you for your kind gift" would be fine. X

 

[mlyn26]

I'd say thanks for all the stuff you bought instead of the travel system for the money.
What a weird woman.

 

[zanDark]

I'd just say thank you for the gift and leave it like that. Yes her behavior is rude and childish, but I'd want to be the bigger person and thank her anyway!

Wow what a piece of work!

 

[jennifer.lee]

Thanks, everyone, for the advice! I think I'll just keep her thank you card general and say "Thanks for the thoughtful gift."

I should have put this in the original post, too, but Target DID exchange the travel system for me without the receipt, and I got full credit for it, since I was able to pull up the item and price online. They gave me a gift card to use in the store, but that was perfect--I got hooded towels, wash clothes, a baby monitor, etc. Basically, I got many things I needed and still didn't have. So it's all working out for us other than the negativity from her and her daughters.

 

[nolansmom]

Take a picture of the stuff - include it in the card and say "thanks for all the lovely gifts"..

 

[lotuspetals]

Omg, are you kidding?? You and DH are being very reasonable. Even though she bought you an expensive gift, it's HER that's being the rude one. I would just thank her for her kindness and generosity, but try to explain honestly why you decided to exchange the travel system. It's up to her how she wants to feel about it after that.

Sorry you have to deal with all that unnecessary drama. Makes me fume, actually, and they're not even my relatives! Lol

 

[Wilsey]

She should have at least spoken to you about getting a different travel system before going ahead and buying it. 'I'd like to get you this travel system instead of this one, what do you think?' and then you could have said 'that's so generous but we really want the one we chose, and we're happy to get it ourselves. There are plenty of other things left on the registry' etc.

Seems so strange to just choose the pram she likes, she won't be using it...you will.

I agree, saying 'thank you for the kind/thoughful gift' and leaving it at that. Sorry you're having to deal with the negative fallout though

 

[Bluewings]

Lol OMG! What is wrong with people?!
My mom will tell me if she doesn't like something but she wouldn't actually order what she likes instead. My in laws did that with a few things this time and last time but they weren't big items like that. I will never understand why someone goes on a registry and chooses something else!

I would be polite and generic. Something like "Thank you very much for helping us prepare for baby! We are grateful for all the help and support. Your taking the time out to buy a gift for _____ was very gracious and we thank you for doing that. "

Blah blah blah.