What really pisses me off!

[mBLACK]

Okay, well, this really has been bothering so I might as well post it here. Ever since getting pregnant, well sorry, NOTICEABLY pregnant, people feel the need to come up to me and tell me how I've ruined my life. Close friends, relatives, strangers, the works. Why do people feel the need to come and tell me that I can no longer travel, do what I want to do, be a teenager, I've ruined my life etc.?
I haven't ruined my life. I just skipped a chapter that's all. I will do what I want to do.
It may just take awhile longer. I will travel, I just need a little more time to make the money. I won't be a horrible parent, I will love my son and that's all that matters.

*sigh* I can understand their concern for me. But I also know that if you concentrate too much on those factors it may make you resent being a teenage mother. Things are NOT out of our reach just because we're young, we'll just have to work a little harder to get them.

 

[mBLACK]

And what they mean by 'being a teenager' I presume, is partying, drinking, drugs, etc. because (sorry, not meant to stereotype) that is what MOST teenagers are doing. I've done my fair share of drugs, I've drank enough alcohol to kill a man 3 or 4 times. So I think I'm done my partying days.

 

[gemma24uk]

i get it all the time 2 hunny, im 24 and pregnant with my 2nd child and wouldnt change it for the world xx

 

[sam's mum]

I’m pissed off for you! It's one thing to discourage a teenager who wants to try for a baby, but I can’t believe people could be so insensitive to someone who is pregnant - you sound incredibly mature, and you’re right, there’s nothing that you will miss out on that you can’t do later. It might be harder to do those things when you have a child, but in my opinion if you are prepared to take on that responsibility and put your life on hold for a few years to do the best for your child, you deserve to be admired for that, not criticised.

 

[carmen]

things are not like they were in the olds day... some people forget tahtw omen with children now are busniness women also have great jobs, go to fitness and plan their life around their baby but still have a life.

People who say that are obviously referring to going getting drunk etc etc, is that life no thats boredom.

You'll do just fine, o.k having a baby limits you but there is still a way to do that. Plus people shouldn t put that negativity on you.

You can be what you wanna be even with your little boy. x

 

[Jayden'sMummy]

I know how you feel MBlack! i have too had my share of people telling me how much I've ruined my life and cannot live my life now because i have a baby to think of. It was my decision to keep this baby, its not like i didn't think of what i would be missing out on before i made up my mind, but to me my baby is more important than going out and getting drunk or taking drugs, going on holiday with my mates etc...
I've even had trouble in the hospital because they treat me so different because of my age, they think because I'm so young i don't know whats happening to MY own body, but i know there wrong. I have to stay strong and ignore them for my baby, its my life - my baby. Things will be hard but they will get easier in time, i know they will an this makes me work harder to make this pregnancy a happy time in my life.

Good luck in the rest of your journey to motherhood, enjoy it xxxx

 

[loulou83]

Having a kid is a lot of work but I know plenty of young mothers and they're all doing fine. I don't think it's an ideal situation but it's doable.

I can relate with the annoying people. I was 22 when I had my baby but I look a lot younger and when I'd be shopping I used to get tons of dirty looks off people... especially when I was pushing my sisters kid around at the same time haha. I just say F**K THEM. It got to the point for me where I'd actually start winding them up on purpose. If I had my niece with me and my Mum was with me too she'd start talking about how I'd have to "look after this one yourself" just to annoy people. Screw them it's none of their biz.

Also if you have support your social life, education etc doesn't have to suffer. I am a single parent myself and I have my sister and mother who babysit for me so I get to go out with friends all the time and I'm going back to college in September.

 

[AmysBumpNo3]

you can still have fun even when youve had kids. it just has to be put on hold abit. and when baby does arrive,the last thing your gonna want to do is go out and party!

some people dont realise, not everyone is the same. what would they rather you did? had an abortion and spent your teenage years sleeping round, getting drunk injecting every drug you can? potentially ending up raped and dead on a street corner. yea...thats sooo much better! (not saying that you would have done that! was just an example!)
well you didnt, and im sure the majority of people are glad youve decided to become a mother and live a mature life bringing up your son.

ignore them insensitive idiots who think they know best. your the one who knows best..afterall...its your life!!! xx

 

[nikky0907]

I have no doubt Mary that you will be a wonderful mother.You have more life experience than most people and you're a smart,mature girl who is gonna do great things with her life.Yours and Your son's.

 

[brownhairedmom]

Okay, here's the thing. I'm 20 years old, 6 courses away from being graduated with a degree, have all my partying out of my system, and didn't get pregnant from a one night stand (although it probably would have been more beneficial to me at this point if I had).

People are still saying things to me. How much more can you ask for, really? I'm happy at this point to have a kid, I just wish it was with another person. People are rude, insenstive, and think its "funny" to tell you that you're huge, that you're in for sleepless nights, that you aren't going to be able to pick up and go anymore, that you HAVE pretty much ruined your life (as you said above).

Its half the reason I'm always in a pregnant rage, because nobody can seem to keep their mouths shut. If I didn't think I could look after this child, I wouldn't be having it. I don't live under a rock, I know its going to be hard and I won't get a lot of sleep. I do NOT need random people I don't even know to tell me that.


Arggg, I could go on forever. Just know that I understand what you're saying!!!! People just make me want to bang my head against a wall

 

[AppleBlossom]

People don't say it to me but although I'm 19 I look a lot younger and I get people looking at me disapprovingly. I don't care what they think to be honest.

 

[Rhi_Rhi1]

ive not had strangers come up to me and say things, but yea like bexy_22 says i get my fair share of dirty looks whilst waiting for the bus/ walking through town ! but i think this is because i look alot younger then 19 but i feel ALOT older!

i also find that people think they can tell you what to do more such as my OH mum she is so iritating, came round yesterday and started touching all my stuff saying "oo yea you have plenty of things for the baby now" and going round my house pointing out odd jobs that need doing (she let her self in btw) and saying things such as " you wont have a minute to yourself when the baby is here" etc etc she really is a nosey cow! x

 

[WaitingForYou]

And what they mean by 'being a teenager' I presume, is partying, drinking, drugs, etc. because (sorry, not meant to stereotype) that is what MOST teenagers are doing. I've done my fair share of drugs, I've drank enough alcohol to kill a man 3 or 4 times. So I think I'm done my partying days.

Exactly the same for me. Ive done the partying, ive done it all its boring me already. Im abit older than you only by about 3 years though, but makes no difference. My mum had a baby at 17 she doesnt think she wasted her life. When I tell them - 2 days to go. Arghh. If she gets hypocritical thats it...she will get a mouthful.

My only ambition in life is to have my own family, a happy one. Although that being the case I didn't intend on getting pregnant right now. Was still a bit of a shock. I knew what I was doing yeah but it didn't bother me. I didn't think it would happen. Nothing would be different if I got pregnant in 10 years instead. I might be more financially capable but I wouldn't love my baby any less. Ill still give it the best start in life I can. Theres much more people out there in worse situations than me.

People that look down on you and judge you just because your pregnant piss me off. What just because were younger we cant look after a child? Yeah right.

 

[polo_princess]

Hun im almost 22 and i get it ... even though i own my own house, car and have a good career.

Dont let them get to you!!

 

[mizzi]

not all teenagers want to go out and get drunk and stuff like that, i know when i was a teenager i didnt want to do that, id rather stay at home and do stuff

 

[ella170]

about not being able to go clubbing, we will still be young enough to go to clubs even when our kids are starting to go. you can still go travelling in your 50s, so i know i'm not going to miss out on anything really. im going to do everything i wanted to do and i don't think i even need to put any of it on hold by even a year.

 

[missjacey44]

Im 19 but iv only had one person say anything about having a baby at my age and that was my doctor, the last person you would think that would say anything but it seems she couldnt keep her opinion to herself! Nobody else has said a word to me and strangers seem to be quite friendly asking when bump is due ect. but either way if somebody said anything i wouldnt even care! Iv lived on my own for the past 2years already and this alone already stopped me going clubbing every weekend like my friends because i had bills to pay and i would of rather spent my money on nice things for my home and my car instead of alcohol and clubbing!! It would be no different if i was to wait and have our baby when i was 30! I dont feel im missing out on anything in my life having a baby now

 

[mBLACK]

Well it's nice to know there are plenty of people out there who feel the same way I do! Just needed to get that rant off my chest, thanks.xx

 

[mommytashaX2]

Well, I don't think that you have ruined your life and for people that don't know you to judge is unfair. I got pregnant with my first child at 14 so I know what its like for people to judge and think that they know it all. You have not ruined your life and you still have plenty of time to do what you want and live your life the way you want just with and addition I finished high school and I was still able to be a teenager. Don't let it get to you because you know better than anyone why you made the decision that you made and if you didn't think you were able to handle it you wouldn't have decided to go through with this. Good luck.

 

[kiles]

Just think you have everyone here to support you hunni.... Good luck we all been here with ppl saying shit Xx