what should i do???

Discussion in 'Teen Pregnancy' started by bellatrixxxx, Dec 11, 2009.

  1. bellatrixxxx

    bellatrixxxx New Member

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    hey...

    so i just found out im pregnant... im sixteen right now...
    what should i do? i mean, do i keep the child? what about adoption? where i live abortion is ilegal
    i mean, i have plans, i wanna go to college and become an engineer. but how in the world am i gonna do this being a MOTHER?

    how is this affecting your life?? i mean, of course it changes your world, but how much? and in what ways? is everything ok between u and ur family? what about friends? im not even gonna ask about the dad, because i really doubt my childs dad is gonna do anything...

    most important: what about u? are u still a teenager or do u feel like u totally lost that part of your life?

    thank u sooo much!!
     
  2. Serene123

    Serene123 Guest

    I had just turned 18 when I fell pregnant with my daughter. It changed my life in every way possible, it isn't my life anymore. I don't resent it though, I love her life being my life, and if anything it has made me more determined to do the things I always wanted to do.

    Where do you live? Would you get help with childcare whilst you're at college? Here it is 100% possible to have a child and go to college, but I'm not sure what it'd be like where you live, if you live somewhere abortion is illegal?
     
  3. Aidan's Mummy

    Aidan's Mummy Mummy to Aidan and Oliver

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    I got pregant at 16, I still got 13 GCSE'S I went to college until I was 9 months preg had 5 months off then caught up with the work and qualfied as a nursery nurse

    and now at 18 I am just about to go to uni to study childrens nursing

    I know its scary hun but it can be done its much hader but life is never easy

    As for affecting my life I dont go out much but I choose that as I would rather be in with aidan. I have grown up alot and I have become independant from my parents. I'm not going to lie its very hard and sometimes you will feel like saying what have I got my self into. But when I go into my sons room in the morning and am greeted with the most adorablke grin it makes it all worth while


    Edit: For college you will get something called care to learn they pay all your childcare fees (if in the uk)
     
  4. Zebra Stars

    Zebra Stars 3RD Trimester

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    ive just turned 17 & im pregnant, im here if u wana talk

    im m oppion i wudnt be able to give the baby away especially whn it starts 2 kick
     
  5. bellatrixxxx

    bellatrixxxx New Member

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    hey Aidan's mummy,

    thank you so much for sharing your story with me. you are an inspiration!
    of course ill think about this a lot before reaching a decision, but i do think i might do the same thing as u did.

    i live in brazil... but i was born in ohio.
     
  6. bellatrixxxx

    bellatrixxxx New Member

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    hey zebra stars,

    i dont feel very connect to my baby yet u know? im gonna be really honest with you. im terrified of the idea of being pregnant. i cant BELIEVE this has happened. i had the pee test today, like, 5 hours ago! i havent told anyone about this yet.

    for how long have u known?
     
  7. Zebra Stars

    Zebra Stars 3RD Trimester

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    i sorta new about 2 weeks ago but took a test on the 8th dec, im about 5-6 weeks,

    ive never liked babies and i shut myself in my room for 40+ hours crying as i didn't want to be preg, but i told my OH & he was like ill support you & i can still carry on with collage, & ive finnally come around to accept this, (things happen for a reason)

    im sure you could cope.
    but the question is do you want a baby?
     
  8. bellatrixxxx

    bellatrixxxx New Member

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    it's sooo hard for me to say that... ive always liked babies. i used to daydream about being pregnant when i was 11. but it wasnt supposed to happen this way!

    i think i can try to fool myself into all this "i dont give a damn about this baby" but im pretty sure i wont be very successful. i simply dont want to accept the fact that i am pregnant and that i actually do care about my baby.

    but i do

    have u told ur friends yet?
     
  9. Novbaby08

    Novbaby08 Mom to Harley & Piper

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    I was 19 when I got pregnant, and pretty much can tell you what the other girls did, changes your life in every way, but for the better.
    I didn't feel connected till I was like 20 weeks.
     
  10. Jas029

    Jas029 Guest

    I can't give you much advice on the whole college thing as I'm only 14 and don't have to worry about college for a few more years..
    You may not feel so connected now but trust me once you feel the kicks and see that L/O in an ultrasound you'll feel so connected and love it so much already!

    I really didn't feel very connected til my 14week scan when I saw a hiccuping thumb sucking little baby..
    I think if I had one eariler when it still wasn't baby shaped I still wouldn't feel very connected to it...
    I hope you get everything sorted out and it all works out for the best :hugs:
     
  11. luxe191919

    luxe191919 Guest

    I am enrolled in college right now.I take 9 hours just 3 classes just trying to get my basics out of the way.It really isnt that bad I am 20 weeks almost now and the only thing that really bothers me about college is the seats lol but I just put my jacket behind my back and it cushions it or there is another girl in my class who is pregnant and she brings a pillow.If you have the will and the drive its not that hard really going to college and doing the homework and having a baby.I have an amazing fiance who is going to help and his family is going to help until we are both graduated.Im 19 btw.I am working to become an RN in labor and delivery.If you really want to keep your baby and have support and you think you can take care of it go for it.If you think you cant then try for an open adoption maybe.That way you can be a part of the childs life still.As for family my parents were mad for a week when I told them but they warmed up to the idea.The only thing they are mad about is my engagment lol.My fiances family (hes not the FOB btw) however is very happy with everything and are willing to support us.I dont think i am missing a big part of my life im simply starting a new chapter with a beautiful baby girl.I moved so I really dont have alot of freinds where I am but the ones I still talk to are very excited and ok with it and have my back.If you have anymore questions you want to ask dont be afraid to PM me I wont mind at all!
     
  12. lizardbreath

    lizardbreath Guest

    Dont make any Rash decisions and really think things threw for one , I got pregnant my very first time when i was 17 and shortly after i turned 18 well my boyfriend was going off to Collage we had just signed a lease for a year in a place 4 hours away from my family and after my boyfriend Convinced me that it was best to have an abortion i went throught with it , worst decision of my life i still wish i could take it back. But then i go pregnant 9 months later at 18 had my daughter at 19 and now im 20 and all in all i wouldnt change having my daughter at the time i did she has made me realise i have more then just me i have to think about when it comes to decision making , Having a baby is Very hard work but Really think your opions over and take to someone and dont let anyone talk you into something you dont want to do this is your baby now and your life. Good luck with your pregnancy and Maybe you should talk to a Trusting adult or Parent .
     
  13. memysonand3

    memysonand3 all done & loven my kids

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    i live in the states but i went through all of high school with my little boy and i was 15 when i fell preg i did it alone because me and the father have fought off and on i worked breastfeed and went to school im not going to lie and say it wasnt a challage but let me tell you it was all worth it i just graduated last may and am so happy i am enrolled in an ocupational collage and will start when my little girls are about 5r months old and plan on working and breastfeeding just like i did with my son nothing is impossible and my choice has ben very rewording to me as was said dont make any rash decions but do think of everything i was so damn scared to have a baby at 16 but it was ment to be i am an AMAZING mother and so will you be if you CHOSE to be
     
  14. Zebra Stars

    Zebra Stars 3RD Trimester

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    most of my friends know, 85% have said there goin to by m prezzis n the ohers abandoned me bt screw them
     
  15. stuffymuffy

    stuffymuffy Well-Known Member

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    You have to decide whats best for you and your baby. I know exactly what you're going through, I'm 17 and a mummy to be, I'm going to be pre-med in college next year so I know how scary it is to think that you're plans have just gone out the window. But plenty of mums have gone before us and made it through college with a baby. It is a really scary thing to think that you're gonna be a mum, but you'll get used to the idea and pretty soon you'll be so excited to meet your little one. If you ever need anyone to talk to , I know what you're going through so feel free to PM me any time!
     

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