When did you tell your work/boss?

Discussion in 'Pregnancy - First Trimester' started by 4magpies, Oct 9, 2013.

  1. 4magpies

    4magpies TTC #2 IVF

    Joined:
    Apr 15, 2010
    Messages:
    11,523
    Likes Received:
    0
    Right, I started here in July, I fell pregnant in September (via IVF, this baby is very planned!) I am on probation till February. If my probation weren't as long I would wait till after I had completed it to tell them but there is no way I can hide being 24 weeks pregnant and telling them after.

    So when did you tell your work?

    I'm thinking of getting it over and done with. I have a scan tomorrow at 7 weeks and OH says I should tell them then? Plus my OH wants to start telling people and I don't want it to get to work before I've told them.

    What do you think?

    I'm good at my job, my boss seems happy with me and it's one of the top 5 companies to work for in the UK from the times survey.
     
  2. rollachick

    rollachick Well-Known Member

    Joined:
    Jul 9, 2013
    Messages:
    402
    Likes Received:
    21
    Hi, im trying to work this out aswell. Im 8weeks now, havent had any sickness or anything that would make it obvious im pregnant. I guess ill see how i feel after my 12 week scan and then decide when to tell them, its gona b a bit anoying as my bosses actually dont run the store i work out so will have to wait for them to come down or i can ring them but would probly prefur talking face to face.

    Sorry i cant help with your dilemma. But yea i rekn its best to tell them before they find out from someone else so they dont think your trying to hid it from them.
     
  3. Wafflewaffle

    Wafflewaffle Well-Known Member

    Joined:
    Sep 1, 2013
    Messages:
    322
    Likes Received:
    0
    I had to tell my boss straight away at 5 weeks because I had to go for an early scan as they were worried i was having an ectopic and I had no holiday days left, plus I'm really sick so they would have to know anyway coz I keep being off/ sick at work
     
  4. 4magpies

    4magpies TTC #2 IVF

    Joined:
    Apr 15, 2010
    Messages:
    11,523
    Likes Received:
    0
    Hey thank you for your reply. It is a hard one isn't it?

    I feel a bit guilty for bring pregnant which is stupid because I shouldn't!
     
  5. petite ping

    petite ping Well-Known Member

    Joined:
    Mar 23, 2012
    Messages:
    734
    Likes Received:
    0
  6. rollachick

    rollachick Well-Known Member

    Joined:
    Jul 9, 2013
    Messages:
    402
    Likes Received:
    21
    I know right!!! I do to, its so stupid. Im assistant manager at work so i know its gona be a big deal when i tell them that im leaving, guess thats why i wana put it off as long as possible :p
     
  7. 4magpies

    4magpies TTC #2 IVF

    Joined:
    Apr 15, 2010
    Messages:
    11,523
    Likes Received:
    0
    Ah thank you. I'm definately doing my job right and I'm the only person that does my job so it cannot be seen as surplus to requirements. I think I should be ok.

    Way I see it is if I tell them now and they try to get rid of me I have more chance of finding another job now than I do later in pregnancy (not showing ect). Also my place paid a big recruitment fee (thousands of pounds) to my recruitment consultancy so I guess they won't want to waste that either.
     
  8. redlemonade

    redlemonade Well-Known Member

    Joined:
    Nov 25, 2012
    Messages:
    2,809
    Likes Received:
    1
    If it were me, I'd hold out until I really had to tell them (when I start showing) only because you're on probation and still very new to the job. Yes, they can't fire you for being pregnant, but being on probation makes you very vulnerable too.

    There's no need to tell them right now and you could re-visit the issue later in the pregnancy. Having even a few more weeks of working there under your belt will stand to you before you tell them.

    That's just my 2 cents though ;) Good luck!
     
  9. 4magpies

    4magpies TTC #2 IVF

    Joined:
    Apr 15, 2010
    Messages:
    11,523
    Likes Received:
    0
    But if I wait till I'm showing and then they get rid of me it's going to be a hell of a lot harder to find a new job?

    The likely hood is they won't get rid of me, but if they did I do think earlier would be better.

    That's just my logic? I've already had a weeks sickness when I was in hospital with gynae issues and they are fine with me after that.

    It's a huge huge world wide company and they wouldn't want to tarnish their reputation as being fantastic to work for is the way I see it.

    As long as I do my job properly like I do, I don't have anything to worry about right?
     
  10. CastawayBride

    CastawayBride Mother of Two

    Joined:
    Nov 7, 2012
    Messages:
    3,772
    Likes Received:
    0
    Unfortunately it all comes down to money. IF you are on probation and they need to fill your spot b/c it costs them money not to whoever is making the decisions, well you just have to hope they have a soft spot. I have seen good people loose their jobs and they were great at what they do.

    AFM, well I am dreading telling work. I was just out for 3 months, 2 months to recover from delivery with my son and then a month to have a work place injury taken care of by surgery. I am back now, on light duty which will continue this pregnancy. I have been there 7 years, guess its my time to be a bit "selfish". :haha: I hate feeling guilty that we want to start a family though!
     
  11. trinity_enigm

    trinity_enigm Cautiously expecting #1

    Joined:
    Feb 28, 2013
    Messages:
    344
    Likes Received:
    0
    I wouldn't wait until feb to tell them but I would wait a little bit longer- at least until 12 weeks just in case god forbid the worst happens you don't want to be worrying about your job at the same time :)

    With the recent changes in employment law you don't have the usual rights until you've been there 2 years. I know the maternity rights are different to this but my point is that if they are going to be difficult during your probation they will probably be difficult up until 2 years.

    If they do find a way to to fire you then you can claim wrongful dismissal but you will need to back this up. Have they done any reviews on your performance since you started?
     
  12. 4magpies

    4magpies TTC #2 IVF

    Joined:
    Apr 15, 2010
    Messages:
    11,523
    Likes Received:
    0
    That's the thing though it would cost the same to cover my maternity as it would to replace me (recruitment fees) as I only get government statuatory maternity pay.
     
  13. FarmMom

    FarmMom Well-Known Member

    Joined:
    Aug 27, 2013
    Messages:
    356
    Likes Received:
    0
    I am planning to tell my boss today - I'm at 12 weeks. Oh wanted me to tell after the 8 week scan but I wanted to make absolutely sure everything is okay. There are layoffs happening at my company right now but i doubt if I get laid off, it will be due to the pregnancy- most likely my whole department would be going out. I would be a little concerned with being on probation but you have to do what you think is best.
     
  14. 4magpies

    4magpies TTC #2 IVF

    Joined:
    Apr 15, 2010
    Messages:
    11,523
    Likes Received:
    0
    I've had numerous losses all early if our scan is fine tomorrow and there is a heartbeat (which I've never had) the risk of MC drops to 5% which is low enough for us to feel ok telling people.

    If they get rid of me they get rid of me but I would rather that sooner than later. I won't have an issue getting another job.

    I think I'll be ok I'm just over analysing. Haha. Like I do with everything.
     
  15. 4magpies

    4magpies TTC #2 IVF

    Joined:
    Apr 15, 2010
    Messages:
    11,523
    Likes Received:
    0
    Right ladies I've had a think.

    Going to keep it from work as long as possible, I only have 3 work people on my Facebook so going to make it so they can't see anything on my profile or say I've deleted my account if they ask.

    We are going to tell the rest of the world tomorrow and if it gets back to work it gets back to work.

    Guess I have to think of number one. No matter when I tell them I'm still gonna be in my probation. Longer I wait the more they've invested in me, time and money. I have a course at 11 weeks.

    Really appreciate all your input and made me see things from another way so thank you all you lovely ladies.

    xxxx
     
  16. Mrs HM

    Mrs HM Well-Known Member

    Joined:
    Feb 22, 2011
    Messages:
    1,915
    Likes Received:
    0
    I was going to post that this is one of those situations that depends on your personality. I'm a worrier and people-pleaser so I'd have to tell after my 12 week scan, that's just who I am.

    Good luck!
     
  17. 4magpies

    4magpies TTC #2 IVF

    Joined:
    Apr 15, 2010
    Messages:
    11,523
    Likes Received:
    0
    I'm a worrier too and a people pleased but guess I have to put myself first for once.

    xxx
     
  18. cait

    cait Well-Known Member

    Joined:
    May 10, 2011
    Messages:
    2,316
    Likes Received:
    0
    Sounds like you've put a lot of thought into it and if you are comfortable telling them at 8 weeks then go for it.

    Personally I will wait until after my 12 week scan, that's my comfort level. But then i will tell as soon as possible as I'm the only person who does my job so I want to give them as long as possible to find cover. I told at about 15 weeks first time round.
     
  19. 4magpies

    4magpies TTC #2 IVF

    Joined:
    Apr 15, 2010
    Messages:
    11,523
    Likes Received:
    0
    That's my thing who ever they get to cover me I will have to train as I'm the only one who does this role and it's very specialised!

    I will feel a bit bad by letting them know so late.
     
  20. Rachie004

    Rachie004 Well-Known Member

    Joined:
    Jan 13, 2013
    Messages:
    1,942
    Likes Received:
    0
    I told my manager after I told my OH but only because it means I can't do my job anymore now that I'm pregnant, totally different circumstances I know so not really helpful to your situation.

    If I were you I would wait it out a few more weeks but then I like to play my cards close to my chest :) xx
     

Share This Page

  1. This site uses cookies to help personalise content, tailor your experience and to keep you logged in if you register.
    By continuing to use this site, you are consenting to our use of cookies.
    Dismiss Notice