Would this upset you or is it just me

[mazee71]

just been asked 'how I was feeling' said was feeling fine physically still up and down emotionally, but getting there. I went on to say I'm going to see gp next week to talk through what she thinks etc.

The person I was speaking to then said - I wouldn't bother - I asked why not - she said well their not going to do anything for you, you have 3 children. Then I said I was hoping because of my age they would look into the 2 losses - she said you've only had 1. I said about the chemical - oh thats like your period - yes your period comes - but after a BFP, no good to me if thats as far as it goes.

I went quiet and said I had to go as I was getting upset - she then got narky with me because I wanted to go - in the end I hung up.

This person would you believe it was my sister

am I being oversensitive.

 

[Jem88]

Your not being oversensitive, but i've had a mc at 9 weeks and a chemical and me personally i was upset when i had the chemical but it only lasted a few days where as when i had the mc at 9 weeks it took me a year to come to terms with it, as i classed the mc at 9 weeks as a baby but the chemical, to me it wasnt really anything.. but i know people do get upset and class there chemicals as a baby and really they have every right too because its still a misscarage just a very early one. i hope your Gp gives you the help you need and you get a sticky bean soon

 

[hb1]

No you're not - sounds like your sister was being insensitive.

hx

 

[mazee71]

Up to what stage is a chemical classed iykwim??

Because technically I suppose both my losses could be called chemicals, the difference is with one I only knew for 2 days then started getting - hpts - then AF arrived.

With the other I knew I was pg for about 10 days - then woke up in a pool of blood - this upset me far much more than the previous cycle.

I do know what you mean, the longer you are pg - the harder it is I think.

 

[hb1]

I think that over 5 weeks it becomes classed as an "early miscarriage" and before this it is a chemical.
Here is a handy couple of links re chemicals :

https://www.ourmiscarriage.com/chemical_pregnancy.html
https://www.suite101.com/article.cfm/preconception/41128

The general advice seems to be following a chemical pregnancy your next pg should theoretically be fine but if you get recurrent chemicals ( just as in any recurrent mc ) then your dr should investigate into why - eg hormonal such as low progesterone.

Hope your dr helps you get some answers and your sister gets a little perspective and looks to support you

hx

 

[mazee71]

Cheers HB1 - going by that then I have had 1 chemical & 1 early mc.

We are trying straightaway, will chat to my gp and tell her whats gone on and see what she says, I am wondering about Asprin but want to talk it through with her 1st.

 

[thelistkeeper]

Sounds to me like your sister is being under sensitive... a chemical, although not a 'true m/c' doesn't hurt any less! Sorry for your losses and hope you get your BFP soon! Keep your faith, and don't let others bring you down...