Would you let a newborn cry it out?

[Trevolaur]

... Are these people real? I feel like this MUST be trolling.... Nobody is this abrasive irl. This is the most bizarre thread I've ever seen carry on like this. I'm pretty new to bnb, but not to forums... And, just... Wow.

To the OP, it sounds like you got a pretty clear consensus, but just to add one more in support, I wouldn't feel badly at all sticking to your guns and saying, "Sorry, I'm putting my foot down on this one. Too young to be left to cry to 'learn' to settle."
Wouldn't work this young anyway.
Good luck! I'm sure your oh and mil won't put up too much of a fuss, it's not their problem if you're up with baby. (Though a conscious Daddy would put in his time, too)

 

[JASMAK]

I absolutely would not, and didnt, let my babies, let alone newborns...cry it out. You know, it makes me feel literally sick to think of it. Please don't do it!

 

[JASMAK]

... Are these people real? I feel like this MUST be trolling.... Nobody is this abrasive irl. This is the most bizarre thread I've ever seen carry on like this. I'm pretty new to bnb, but not to forums... And, just... Wow.

To the OP, it sounds like you got a pretty clear consensus, but just to add one more in support, I wouldn't feel badly at all sticking to your guns and saying, "Sorry, I'm putting my foot down on this one. Too young to be left to cry to 'learn' to settle."
Wouldn't work this young anyway.
Good luck! I'm sure your oh and mil won't put up too much of a fuss, it's not their problem if you're up with baby. (Though a conscious Daddy would put in his time, too)

Oh oh...what did I miss? Must go read now.

 

[JASMAK]

Oh dear.

 

[HanaK]

"Elizah", if you are who I think you are (you have used some words that are familiar to me and the rest of it adds up), then all I have to say is that maybe it's worth taking some time away from the internet mommy debates because it's really not helping, but rather causing anger, sort of a self-vicious cycle. You know darn well that plenty of us "AP" moms just do what we do because we feel comfortable doing it, it's not about being chicken shit mothers, and lashing out at others isn't going to make you feel better about your choices.

In fact, in reading your first few posts, I *know* which poster you are. And it sort of breaks my heart because I know you are a good person and are probably just angry at some people. I don't condone some of the things said here and I certainly don't agree that babies who are sleep trained will be 'damaged' (I think that is more reserved for chronic neglect), don't let extreme views feed negativity in you.

Hugs!

I genuinely couldn't figure out who it was lol

I believe it is someone I would consider a friend, who left us a few months ago

It isn't, actually.

 

[Emerald87]

Holy heck this is nuts in here!

Mommyjogger, you're not the only scientist. There are thousands of us (many with more post graduate credentials and working experience than yourself) and I know many on this site alone. They are generally a very kind bunch who are all for debate.
For those who are "worthy" in your mind to analyse articles, could you please link to some that you are particularly referencing for and against CIO (NOT Newborn, as I have gone through the thread and seen plainly that that is not supported by the CC/CIO delegates here)?

 

[fieryphoenix]

HanaK: how would you know? I'm sure it was a disgruntled x-bnb member too, that's why its inactive now

 

[suzib76]

I don't understand all the debate about whether or not leaving a newborn to CIO causes future problems etc, from me it a really basic concept, in the here and now. I couldn't imagine how a newborn must feel AT THAT POINT, let alone what it may more may not do in terms of further problems. Natural instinct for me

If you don't like sleep training stay out of sleep training threads. It's a free world.

And I know it's way late but this is the best thing I have ever read on here, particularly from one calling hypocrisy

 

[pinklightbulb]

I never left my newborns, for the record, don't support that at all. Although I have seen it done and it makes me just as sick as anyone else should feel about it. But I am a CC/CIO advocate for older babies, for many reasons. It's possible to be against newborn sleep training, which is a no-brainer, and still believe it is a useful method down the track. I'd only ever say to leave a newborn if you are about to crack.

 

[Noodlebear]

I never left my newborns, for the record, don't support that at all. Although I have seen it done and it makes me just as sick as anyone else should feel about it. But I am a CC/CIO advocate for older babies, for many reasons. It's possible to be against newborn sleep training, which is a no-brainer, and still believe it is a useful method down the track. I'd only ever say to leave a newborn if you are about to crack.

I don't like CC/CIO but I think the key thing to remember is that actually - no one does!! I am lucky and only have the odd blip with Lucas at bed time and a teeny bit of fuss when he's first put into bed so I've never NEEDED to try anything like that. If your LO just won't settle, for your own sanity and for yours and your LO's health, I see why they'd be methods people eventually resort to.

 

[aliss]

"Elizah", if you are who I think you are (you have used some words that are familiar to me and the rest of it adds up), then all I have to say is that maybe it's worth taking some time away from the internet mommy debates because it's really not helping, but rather causing anger, sort of a self-vicious cycle. You know darn well that plenty of us "AP" moms just do what we do because we feel comfortable doing it, it's not about being chicken shit mothers, and lashing out at others isn't going to make you feel better about your choices.

In fact, in reading your first few posts, I *know* which poster you are. And it sort of breaks my heart because I know you are a good person and are probably just angry at some people. I don't condone some of the things said here and I certainly don't agree that babies who are sleep trained will be 'damaged' (I think that is more reserved for chronic neglect), don't let extreme views feed negativity in you.

Hugs!

I genuinely couldn't figure out who it was lol

I believe it is someone I would consider a friend, who left us a few months ago

It isn't, actually.

Well, I'm not 100% sure, it's just a guess on my part. Is it you or a friend of yours? How do you know?

 

[HanaK]

I am 100% sure it isn't Noelle yes.

 

[seaweed eater]

Holy heck this is nuts in here!

Mommyjogger, you're not the only scientist. There are thousands of us (many with more post graduate credentials and working experience than yourself) and I know many on this site alone. They are generally a very kind bunch who are all for debate.
For those who are "worthy" in your mind to analyse articles, could you please link to some that you are particularly referencing for and against CIO (NOT Newborn, as I have gone through the thread and seen plainly that that is not supported by the CC/CIO delegates here)?

^^ Particularly articles on the effects of mild to moderate degrees of stress. I don't think the neglect thing is a straw man because tons of people refer to Darcia Narvaez' work, and that seems to be the basis of her argument. I honestly don't see a lot of people, at least on here, making the same arguments you do.

 

[aliss]

I am 100% sure it isn't Noelle yes.

I never said it was Noelle, I know it's not Noelle. I'm pretty sure it isn't anyone from that whole 'task force' hoopla.

 

[Dragonfly]

No I wouldn't let a new born cio or a baby or any age or even child after. Babies have needs that need met and thats mums job to do it.

 

[Dragonfly]

I love my child with all my heart. I do what's best for her and me. I don't give a flying fuck what anyone else does with theirs. As long as they're fed, clothed and happy.

MommyJogger, you especially need to.........



GO GET FUCKED

Well that escalated quickly. Nothing like a personally addressed "get fucked" to make you feel like a special snowflake.

Not dragging anything up again but that answer made me lol

 

[kerrie24]

No I would never ignore my baby ( or child) while they screamed for me in another room.

 

[MommyJogger]

Holy heck this is nuts in here!

Mommyjogger, you're not the only scientist. There are thousands of us (many with more post graduate credentials and working experience than yourself) and I know many on this site alone. They are generally a very kind bunch who are all for debate.
For those who are "worthy" in your mind to analyse articles, could you please link to some that you are particularly referencing for and against CIO (NOT Newborn, as I have gone through the thread and seen plainly that that is not supported by the CC/CIO delegates here)?

^^ Particularly articles on the effects of mild to moderate degrees of stress. I don't think the neglect thing is a straw man because tons of people refer to Darcia Narvaez' work, and that seems to be the basis of her argument. I honestly don't see a lot of people, at least on here, making the same arguments you do.

Never said I was the only scientist here or even the best. Nor did I say that others here aren't "worthy". Just that I don't think Noelle, in particular, is capable, despite that she specifically put herself out there as the "go-to" person on infant sleep, even to those who weren't expressing problems with their infant's sleep (ie. me).
I will certainly post links for you, most likely on Mon or Tue. I'm not sure I'll be going into work this weekend, so I'd have to access them on our library's website and they have a piss poor search algorithm atm. (I can type in a correct full title and not get that article as a return sometimes. It's really frustrating.)
In the meantime, feel free to peruse the link I posted before.

 

[MommyJogger]

Well, I'm not 100% sure, it's just a guess on my part. Is it you or a friend of yours? How do you know?

Just based on her join date and apparent depth of knowledge about who's who, I'd assume HanaK is another puppet account by one of them. I thought she might be one of them a couple months ago (I actually thought she was the twister person), but dropped the idea when her account stuck around for so long without being inactivated.

 

[HanaK]

I feel the need to defend Noelle here. The reason she became so knowledgeable about sleep was that her daughter didn't. Her only intention was support for mums as frazzled as her. She has never declared herself an expert; she has simply demonstrated a wide knowledge on a subject close to her heart. What better thing to do with such a wealth of knowledge than to share it with others who are struggling to cope? She is and always has been able to present a balanced view, but you wouldn't really know about that would you? My understanding is that your issue with her stems from the fact that mums listened to her, 'expert' or not.