Would you "smack" your child?

I was smacked...but im not an aggresive person at all..in fact it made me the total opposite. x
 
I would smack my kids if they were being naughty enough and other discipline methods weren't effective for them. Ella seems to be responding well to time out at the moment, so haven't ever needed to spank her yet. I'm not even sure it would work right now because she has such a padded tushie with her big fat cloth nappies, she'd not even feel a smack on her bottom! :lol:

Oh and I was smacked as a child and never thought it was acceptable for me to hit anyone. I am extremely close to my mum and we are best friends. I don't even remember being scared of my parents, even when they threatened to spank me.
 
I think two of the BIGGEST fallacies surrounding smacking in my opinion (and maybe this is going into debate territory :blush:) are that 1. if you smack a child they'll become violent or 2. if you don't smack a child they won't learn discipline or right from wrong.

Yet it's implied or said or believed by SO many people.
 
My criminology professor told us that if you are hit as a child you will grow up to be a criminal. I wonder what happened to me? :rofl:
 
when i see parents hitting their children it is when their child has wound them up so much that they resort to hitting! The parent is usually so wound up too that I don't reckon they realise how hard they are hititng their child! It's all out of frustration and it's the child that suffers!
 
I was smacked as a child... I don't think it did me any harm, and definitely deterred me in later life when I was in secondary school for example - I remember everyone wagging lessons but I was too scared incase my dad found out and gave me a good hiding! Saying that makes it sound as though he beat me, which he didn't - he would just smack us.

However, having said that - I don't smack Harry. Not because i'm against smacking, but because it simply doesn't work with him. I have given his hand a smack once or twice, but he has just smacked me back which I don't want. He is also going through a smacking phase at the moment too which i'm trying to get him out of - he must have picked it up at nursery.

We tend to go with the time-out method, which in our house means he goes out in the hall (there's nothing out there, and there's a stair gate so he can't go anywhere either). If he does something like smacks me, I warn him, and if he does it again he goes out. He hates it and cries for the full 2 minutes he's there (we've just upped it from 1 min to 2 as he'll be 2 next week). It definitely works and he returns very sorry and full of cuddles, so I think we'll be sticking to this method.
 
I remember getting a few smacks from my Mum when I was an older child maybe 7 or 8, but I don't think of myself as an 'abused' child, just probably being really annoying and cheeky!! My Dad never smacked us but he only had to give us 'the look' and we stopped whatever we were doing pretty quickly!

I was really close to my parents - they're not here any more for me to discuss this with and that makes me sad but I had real respect for them.
I'm not totally anti-smacking, if you decide thats what you feel the best thing to do with your own child then who am I to judge?

I don't think I could physically bring myself to smack Charlie - I just don't think it'll get us anywhere. I don't think the odd light smack for those who do do it is going to turn a kid into a violent adult!

ETA: I'm 38 this year too, so I think our parents attitude to smacking was totally different in the 70's to now!
 
when i see parents hitting their children it is when their child has wound them up so much that they resort to hitting! The parent is usually so wound up too that I don't reckon they realise how hard they are hititng their child! It's all out of frustration and it's the child that suffers!

I think if this is the reason you end up smacking your children, then it's the wrong form of discipline for you to use. The worst thing you can do is smack because you got too angry to use any other form of discipline.
 
when i see parents hitting their children it is when their child has wound them up so much that they resort to hitting! The parent is usually so wound up too that I don't reckon they realise how hard they are hititng their child! It's all out of frustration and it's the child that suffers!

I think if this is the reason you end up smacking your children, then it's the wrong form of discipline for you to use. The worst thing you can do is smack because you got too angry to use any other form of discipline.

I totally agree if you are angry and in the heat of the moment you should take a time out yourself and then decide on the punishment
 
I was smacked as a kid, and turned out fine too, HOWEVER, I don't believe the line of "but I'm fine....." really holds any ground. That was over 20years ago and things were different then. We grow as a species and evolve and to continue doing whatever our parents did means that will be stunted.

So, in saying that, No, I will never intentionally smack P as a form of discipline, the only time I could ever see me doing it, would be a reflex action if he was about to hurt himself by touching something hot like the oven, or run out onto a road, and I know already that the reaction would more be from a momentary loss of control and worry/fear on my part then wanting to punish him for his actions.

My Uncle/Aunt have 3 young children, 2 boys, 9 & 7 and a daughter 6. They are generally good kids but will wind each other up constantly. One night I saw the younger of the two boys do something wrong (in their parents eyes) however the father assumed it was the older of the 2 as he was normally the 'naughty' one. He took him to his room and from the lounge I could hear him telling his son to pull down his pants so he could be smacked on the bum. :( All the while this boy was trying to get his dad to listen to him so he could say that it wasn't him that had done it. However the father refused to listen and smacked him regardless....

Until this night I was unsure if I would ever smack P, but I don't EVER want to be a parent that is so intent on punishing my child, that I don't actually listen to what they have to say first.
 
Laila is too young to be disciplined but i can say i was smacked by my mam and have the utmost respect for her.. and i'm not one bit violent or aggressive xx
 
very well said. I wouldn't of been able to listen to that poor boy without stepping in. My dh tends to yell and walk away with out gi ing thekids the time of day. Its upsetting but I do get him to talk to the kids.
I was smacked as a kid, and turned out fine too, HOWEVER, I don't believe the line of "but I'm fine....." really holds any ground. That was over 20years ago and things were different then. We grow as a species and evolve and to continue doing whatever our parents did means that will be stunted.

So, in saying that, No, I will never intentionally smack P as a form of discipline, the only time I could ever see me doing it, would be a reflex action if he was about to hurt himself by touching something hot like the oven, or run out onto a road, and I know already that the reaction would more be from a momentary loss of control and worry/fear on my part then wanting to punish him for his actions.

My Uncle/Aunt have 3 young children, 2 boys, 9 & 7 and a daughter 6. They are generally good kids but will wind each other up constantly. One night I saw the younger of the two boys do something wrong (in their parents eyes) however the father assumed it was the older of the 2 as he was normally the 'naughty' one. He took him to his room and from the lounge I could hear him telling his son to pull down his pants so he could be smacked on the bum. :( All the while this boy was trying to get his dad to listen to him so he could say that it wasn't him that had done it. However the father refused to listen and smacked him regardless....

Until this night I was unsure if I would ever smack P, but I don't EVER want to be a parent that is so intent on punishing my child, that I don't actually listen to what they have to say first.
 
Not going to read any of the other replies because no doubt most of them are judgemental lol but yes, I have smacked my child. And I probably will again in the future if I feel it's necessary. She does not respond at all to any other methods such as naughty step/chair etc. She isn't a bad child but she is a 2 year old and she tests my patience on purpose. I can't remember the last time I smacked her tbh because it really is a last resort for me. I will get down to her level and tell her not to do something. If she carries on she gets told off properly. It's NOT abuse. A small smack on the bum once in a blue moon is in no way comparable to some of the sick things people do to their kids that IS classed as abuse. I don't believe it breeds violence, G is never violent towards me and doesn't hit me. It's just that sometimes, it is the only form of discipline she will respond to. Oh and I always said I would never smack her. Then she turned 2...
 
I wont ever smack Sofia, I don't think its a horrible form of punishment if it works for you but it goes against my belief's and I know that if I ever did resort to it, it would be reactionary and because I was scared if she was in danger etc. I don't ever want her to be at the end of my feelings, I'm the grown-up! therefore we have made the decision never ever to lay a finger on her. When I was little I was very very rarely smaked and it was always as a reaction to fear (me falling of a bike into the road etc) so never to punish but as a result of loss of control of feelings..... i think that's confusing for children. xxxx
 
I've tapped liams hand a few times when he's gone near the sky box or to open the drawyer. lil monkey still does it but most of the time if i just say no firmly he'll turn round and smack his hand lol when he's older i'll use the naughty step it seems quite good. My mum use to smack me alot, hard enough to leave a hand print and i still have the memorys of it now so i wont be smacking.
 
I believe if you use the right disipline and do it properly then you'll never have to resort to smacking.

Saying that, never say never! My nephews are 3 and 4 and i only see them a couple of times a week, but when i do they are so naughty and cheeky that even i want to give them a tap sometimes!! Lol. No doubt it will cross my mind when Bella starts playing up!
 
Nope, I don't believe in smacking or spanking. I don't understand why people do it. It takes time to guide your child into doing the right things. If ds1 has a tantrum I don't say he's naughty and I don't normally discipline him for it, because tantrums are a part of being a little kid and they normally happen because they have a hard time communicating and controling their anxiety when they can't tell you what they want. I just try to help ds1 understand and guide him into communicating better.
 
Imo some children may benefit from a smack bum, hand whatever but others would not.
I wouldnt do it for an everyday punishment but as a last resort i wouldnt rule it out.

My son is a very spirited little boy and needs a firm hand, i have smacked him twice when all else has failed, but i try other methods first and obviously gets a warning first.

But i think smacking a sensetive child will do no good, maybe even have the oppisite effect. It depends on your child

ETA: I was smacked on a few occasions growing up but only when really naughty and i like to think i grew up well.
 
I was occasionally smacked as a child when i really pushed my parents to the limit and i'm fine, i'm not a violent person or a criminal lol.

I have tapped noah on the hand before now and on the back of his leg when he has become so naughty that nothing else will work and that is really not very often at all.

I have nothing against people smacking their children occasionally, but feel that if as a parent you are VERY angry and wound up when you do smack your child, that it could cause you to hit them too hard, hitting out of your own anger rather than at the action the child is doing is when it all goes a bit wrong. If you understand what i mean?
A quick tap as a warning to snap the childs way of thinking is one thing but if you are shouting and very angry and you smack it may turn out nasty.
 
Not going to read any of the other replies because no doubt most of them are judgemental lol but yes, I have smacked my child. And I probably will again in the future if I feel it's necessary. She does not respond at all to any other methods such as naughty step/chair etc. She isn't a bad child but she is a 2 year old and she tests my patience on purpose. I can't remember the last time I smacked her tbh because it really is a last resort for me. I will get down to her level and tell her not to do something. If she carries on she gets told off properly. It's NOT abuse. A small smack on the bum once in a blue moon is in no way comparable to some of the sick things people do to their kids that IS classed as abuse. I don't believe it breeds violence, G is never violent towards me and doesn't hit me. It's just that sometimes, it is the only form of discipline she will respond to. Oh and I always said I would never smack her. Then she turned 2...

You're forgetting this is the toddler section, not so much by way of judgment in here! :lol:

I'm another who was smacked as a child and I'm fine but I also don't believe in that kind of argument. At the moment, I'm saying I will never smack Aisling and I really do hope I will stick to that. I want to understand her behaviour and try to reason with her (I can hear you seasoned parents giggling already!). I'm reading Dr Sears Good Behaviour book at the moment and it's making alot of sense so you never know :)
 

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