3 failed IUIs. How do you cope?

[moni77]

Thinking of you Willow...

 

[britborn80]

Just found this board as I am new to the site - it is encouraging and comforting to see everyone's posts. Excited for those who have their BFP's and hopeful for those who aren't there yet. DH and I did our first IUI on 10/20 - blood test tomorrow at 8am and I am very nervous. This has been 1000 times more stressful than I ever thought it would be - I generally consider myself to be quite level headed, but this has driven me crazy with angst. So, I am looking for a place to gain support and also just to be able to vent a little when things don't go my way!

 

[Maverick007]

Willow...I'm so sorry...hope you are recovering okay.

 

[kjg123]

Hi everyone. Just stumbled across this site when searching for "success for IUI #5" and spent the past 2 hours reading it!
Congrats to everyone on their BFPs and my heart also breaks for all the losses.
Sunshine - i read your story like a good book and couldn't wait to turn the pages!

I am 30 and my husband and I have been trying to conceive for 11 months now. We have done 4 medicated cycles (femara) with 2 IUIs. Our doc recommended moving to IVF as I have never been pregnant and the IUIs have not been successful (I also have had thin lining, only one follicle each time, and husband with good #s but low morphology).
We have decided to do a 5th medicated cycle with IUI while we make arrangements for IVF. If not successful, I am hoping to start the IVF process in December. These stories definitely give me encouragement.

Looking forward to hearing everyones stories and hopefully sharing some of my own good news!

 

[StayHopeful]

Brit and kjg, welcome! The women on here are so supportive and I hope that both of you get your bfp soon.

Willow, thinking about you!

 

[kjg123]

anyone with success stories with a thin lining? on all my cycles of femara i have not been able to get my lining above 6.5-7mm.
giving it one more shot this month before heading to IVF. Afraid that a thin lining will hurt my chances with IVF as well...

 

[summer2011]

kjg, have they tried you on injectables yet? Those made a pretty big difference to my lining. My lining was thin on clomid (6.5ish I think) and I ended up with an ectopic. Femara seemed to be better, but I only tried femara alone for one month before they switched me to low dose puregon.

 

[SashimiMimi]

Willow I've been thinking of you all week and hope you are taking good care of yourself. Hugs to you.

I'm always happy when new people find support on this thread. Even though my son is a toddler now and by some miracle I ended up with a surprise second pregnancy, I still remember very clearly what infertility feels like and those emotions will be with me forever. The only way I got through it was finding wonderful people online like in this group!! Welcome Brit and Kjg!

Kjg my lining was always super thin during my IUI attemps. I did one unmedicated cycle, one with femara and one with puregone injections before moving on to IVF. They all failed but when I finally did IVF my lining seemed to cooperate.

I had 15 eggs retrieved, only 3 fertilized and then only one made it to transfer. As I've posted in here many times, I was very upset I only had one embryo and didn't think it would work. It did and I had a little boy who is now almost 18 months. I am so glad all my IUIs failed and I'm so glad we did IVF and that I went through all those months of frustration and misery because I got the little boy I was meant to have. I keep thinking if it had worked right away it would be some other baby and I wouldn't be as patient a mom. There is something very special about IUI and IVF babies!!
My doctor said I would never conceive naturally as I had major egg quality issues and I was planning to do IVF again. Then somehow I got pregnant naturally when my son was 13 months. There was a very long time that I thought I would never be a mom, so stay positive. There are many bumps in the road with fertility treatments and a lot of stress and frustration. But it will happen!

 

[Dini]

Welcome ladies! I found so much support on this site, and it was so nice to log back on after a few months away to find some with BFP's!

Britborn, my DH also has low morphology, all other numbers were good but his morphology was terrible. We did about 6 medicated cycles and 2 IUI's and had to take a financial break, and we ended up with a natural BFP. Still so hard to believe really, I heard so many stories but never ever thought I'd be one of them. I was also told IVF was the next and only option and at my age we felt we really needed to do it. Don't give up ladies, we all know it's an emotinal roller coaster but there is always hope!

 

[StayHopeful]

Kjg, I had a thin lining too. It was really thin on Clomid, part of the reason they moved me to Femara. It was better on Femara but still not great, which is why they added injectibles. I didn't have any issues with my lining when I did my IVF cycle.

 

[kjg123]

My RE is holding off on injects because of my PCOS and so many small follicles --> high risk of multiples/overstim.

Unfortunately, my RE office does not do any IVF in December (closed for quality improvement stuff). So I guess I will continue with Femara cycle # 5 and 6 before getting a chance to start IVF in January.

Although I've done 4 medicated cycles, only 2 have been with IUI (timing issues). My husband also has low morphology so I'm hoping I still have chance if i can get my lining up and couple that with IUI. I feel like IVF is going to be the road for me, but I'm still holding out a sliver of hope for a BFP before we get there..

CD8 for me. First scan CD12. Thanks for listening so far!

 

[WillowGrace]

Brit and kjg, Welcome!
I am hopeful for you! I have some coworker friends who were successful with medicated IUI cycles, so it does work for people.

I also want to hug all of you for being so kind and thinking of me.
After the D and C I had pain, cramps, discomfort that evening. I took one pain pill that night and did not need any more after that. The heating pad was my best friend.

The next day I was off, so I just took it easy. I had very minimal bleeding the evening of the procedure and woke up the next day to really no bleeding spotting at best. If I got up too much that next day to walk around I would start to feel crampy. My other symptom has been headache everyday and all night long.

Since Monday I have felt my emotions go a little wild. One minute I'm happy, one minute I'm angry, and the next minute I'm ready to sob my eyes out. I think it's just the hormones crashing down. I keep seeing pregnant people and I almost lost it when I walked through the "baby isle" in the grocery store yesterday.

I still feel "bloated", but not as much and really just feel fat. I gained a few pounds with the pregnancy and some during these treatments with the fertility clinic over the last year...probably around 10 lbs. total. I'm feeling like I need to lose some lbs. to make myself feel better. I should mention that I am a healthy BMI not overweight, but I'm more comfortable being a little lighter than I am now.

So, that's what I'm going to be focusing my energy on for the next few months is to drop about 5-10 lbs., enjoy the holidays with family and friends, and learn as many insider tips for IVF as I can, so I am armed with a plan.

I go on Wednesday to see how my HCG levels are dropping. They want to continue to monitor them as they go all the way down. I was supposed to go in a week after the procedure, but I'm not able to on Monday. I am interested to hear the number.

Looking ahead I have to change my health insurance benefits, so I will have more coverage, now that it is November and open enrollment time. Once benefits roll over in January I should be able to start shortly after. I'm thinking we will be starting IVF with ICSI in February.

Does anyone else have any other ideas for diversions? I cannot afford vacations, but any hobbies, good books, movies, or other things you think may keep my mind a little less crazy from waiting to TTC?

 

[SashimiMimi]

Hi Willow! It's great to hear an update. I think it's perfectly normal to have your emotions flying all over the place, but over all it sounds like you are holding up pretty well.

Your plan to focus in IVF in the new year sounds like a good one. I also gained an extra 10 lbs from the IUIs and also felt like I needed to focus on my health and fitness before going for IVF. I joined a spin class at my local gym and it was great not just physically, but emotionally. It was a perfect way to channel all my anger and sadness toward infertility and nothing working!! I also took a sewing class which was a lot of fun and another good distraction. My SIL also suffered from infertility and she did a baking class, as well as started running marathons.

If a vacation is out of the question, maybe you and your OH could do little weekend day trips. We actually did go on vacation before doing IVF, but I don't think it was so much about being away as it was about just relaxing, letting go of cycle monitoring for a while and reconnecting as a couple. We had been trying for a year and a half by that point and it was so nice just to feel like us again. Maybe try going out for a few nice dinners and just eat and drink whatever you want without having to worry!

 

[SashimiMimi]

Oh and I forgot to mention, I researched a ton of things about ways to make IVF more effective and for me personally I think it was doing acupuncture along with my IVF cycle. My acupuncturist also came to my transfer and I think it had a huge impact on my one embryo actually sticking.

I also read that laughter is something that helps, so I watched a lot of Arrested Development on Netflix.

 

[PinkPeony]

I'm a bit of an artsy craftsy type person and I found giving myself a creative project to work on was very good for my psychological state. I took a silkscreening class which I loved and gave me something else to focus on.

 

[WillowGrace]

All great ideas! Thanks, ladies!

I am an artsy person, too. I love making things. I'm also guilty of being a work-a-holic, which really isn't the best diversion. It's part of my job though.

 

[StayHopeful]

I agree with exercising and lots of funny TV. And I did acupuncture as well, I really think that contributed to my successful IVF.

 

[kjg123]

just wanted to check in. i'm 4dpiui this cycle. This is my 5th medicated cycle but my 3rd iui. Had best response to femara yet: 3 follicles all around 18-20mm with a lining of around 7.5mm (usually never above 7 for me).
i had iui around 35 hours after trigger (and bd'd that night).

dealing with PCOS and thin lining as well as 2-3% morphology.

even though this is my most promising cycle to date, i still cant help to think about things that could have gone wrong. what if i ovulated before 35 hours...we hadn't bd'd since a few days before trigger. what if the trigger didn't get me to ovulate (no LH surge)? what if i end up with triplets?? i guess all these questions are normal. ready for the holidays so this next week flies by!

 

[summer2011]

Good luck kjg,
I know it's hard but try not to think it through too much. You can drive yourself crazy with unknowns. Just trust in your body, it'll happen.

 

[StayHopeful]

Hang in there, kjg! I know it's hard not to think of all the "what ifs" during the tww.