4 Leaf Clover IVF / ICSI Buddies

[MaryB]

Kelly, For egg retrieval, they knocked me out completely, so I imagine they must at least do local anesthesia if they plan on keeping you awake!

 

[vineyard]

Wow lots to read, thanks for welcoming me! Our down regging (as you call it) here is three weeks of high dose then when you start stimms it is 2 or 3 week of half the dose or something. I won't be starting IVF till the new year like Feb or March but I will be starting IUI in oct/nov. I am really hoping the IUI works cause I read the procedure for IVF and it is scary! Is the egg retrieval painful? They said they give you conscious sedation where I will be going but a needle through the vaginal wall into the ovary does not sound like a picnic...

I would take the IVF conscious sedation again any day. I did not feel a thing!!!! In fact, that was the best sleep I'd gotten in a long time! I was a tad bit sore after but not too bad.

 

[Brambletess]

Well, the news isn't great from my first ultrasound. The little guy is over a week behind in development. Yesterday, July 28, I was 5 weeks 5 days gestational age and exactly 4 weeks fetal age. The doctor said the ultrasound only shows four and a half weeks gestational age, so almost a week and a half behind.

Makes sense given my age, I guess. Suppose that's why I didn't want to get too excited about the BFP because of this risk (and so many others down the road). I go next week for another ultrasound -- maybe we've got a late bloomer! It was tough to see it on the monitor though, it was small compared to other images I'd seen on line; and it looking so vulnerable makes you want to protect it all the more.

Thanks for all the support. We'll see what happens next week, but I'm not optimistic. I'll talk with the ladies on the miscarriage thread, see what their experience is.

I really hope the next ultrasound shows a growth spirt, they all develop at slightly different rates and it may catch up a bit by last time, its only just over a week different.

 

[Brambletess]

I don't know where else to vent my frustrations. Our FS told us to cut drinking right back from 10 units a week during treatment for me and a couple of months before treatment for DH. So this is basically nothing or one drink a week. However my DH continues to have a pint of beer every day, which is way over 10 units a week. I have asked him to stop but he sais he enjoys it. The trouble is I am an ex smoker and during my miscarriage i transgressed and smoked for a few days, I also had a couple of cigeretttes on holiday too, so he thinks i am being hypocritical as i haven't been perfect. However I have given up again totally now and do so much other stuff like controlling my diet, exercising, acupuncture, taking chinese herbs and he does nothing except take a vitamin ill i force on him every night, all he has to do is not drink and he won't even do that. He thinks because he is not getting drunk that its ok, even though he is an intelligent man and he was there when the doctor told him to stop. I am beginning to wonder if its a form of passive aggression towards me, we aren't getting on amazingly and maybe its his way of hurting me. I am in such a dilema about it as if we are like this now, maybe we won't cut it through the whole process and we shouldn't be doing this. I am coming up 37 though and realise my time is running out and if i don't do it now, it probably won't happen. However having a child when one's relationship is on very rocky ground is probably a selfish thing to do. I am going to think about it today and probably approach him tonight. if he doesnt want this anymore with me, its best to find out now. Sigh

 

[Cupcake Queen]

Mary B - I'm sure the little bean will put in a good effort over the next week and play catch up with his growing. FX

Brambletess - sorry to hear that you DH is being a bit selfish. I too have to remind my DH to cut back on the booze (esp given our fertility issues are due to him!!!) and also to take his chinese herbs. He too is a smart man - and I don't understand why he just doesn't do it!! Frustrating.

I am sure your DH probably thinks that one beer a day won't do any harm (even if doctor says so). Maybe just have a chat with him about it - you know what men are like - sometimes they need the bleedin obvious pointed out continuously before it sinks in. I am sure he wants a baby with you - and everyone goes through a rough path (we have just come out of ours so you are not alone) but you will come through it stronger.

 

[Mrs G]

I don't know where else to vent my frustrations. Our FS told us to cut drinking right back from 10 units a week during treatment for me and a couple of months before treatment for DH. So this is basically nothing or one drink a week. However my DH continues to have a pint of beer every day, which is way over 10 units a week. I have asked him to stop but he sais he enjoys it. The trouble is I am an ex smoker and during my miscarriage i transgressed and smoked for a few days, I also had a couple of cigeretttes on holiday too, so he thinks i am being hypocritical as i haven't been perfect. However I have given up again totally now and do so much other stuff like controlling my diet, exercising, acupuncture, taking chinese herbs and he does nothing except take a vitamin ill i force on him every night, all he has to do is not drink and he won't even do that. He thinks because he is not getting drunk that its ok, even though he is an intelligent man and he was there when the doctor told him to stop. I am beginning to wonder if its a form of passive aggression towards me, we aren't getting on amazingly and maybe its his way of hurting me. I am in such a dilema about it as if we are like this now, maybe we won't cut it through the whole process and we shouldn't be doing this. I am coming up 37 though and realise my time is running out and if i don't do it now, it probably won't happen. However having a child when one's relationship is on very rocky ground is probably a selfish thing to do. I am going to think about it today and probably approach him tonight. if he doesnt want this anymore with me, its best to find out now. Sigh

Oh hun, I know what you mean. I'm convinced men have SUCH an issue with fertility and believe there is absolutely no way it can possibly be their problem. I think they think they all have super sperm who will triumph regardless of their actions and behaviour. Changing their behaviour means admitting there is a problem. I can't get dh to even take a vit pill and even though he doesn't drink every night, he can sink quite a few on a weekend. I'm really hoping that when we go for our appointment on Monday the reality of this sinks in and gives him a bit of a wake up call.

Does your clinic offer counselling? Maybe it might be worth trying that. I hope you can talk to him, this is all you need now you are so close.

Kath xxx

 

[MaryB]

I don't know where else to vent my frustrations. Our FS told us to cut drinking right back from 10 units a week during treatment for me and a couple of months before treatment for DH. So this is basically nothing or one drink a week. However my DH continues to have a pint of beer every day, which is way over 10 units a week. I have asked him to stop but he sais he enjoys it. The trouble is I am an ex smoker and during my miscarriage i transgressed and smoked for a few days, I also had a couple of cigeretttes on holiday too, so he thinks i am being hypocritical as i haven't been perfect. However I have given up again totally now and do so much other stuff like controlling my diet, exercising, acupuncture, taking chinese herbs and he does nothing except take a vitamin ill i force on him every night, all he has to do is not drink and he won't even do that. He thinks because he is not getting drunk that its ok, even though he is an intelligent man and he was there when the doctor told him to stop. I am beginning to wonder if its a form of passive aggression towards me, we aren't getting on amazingly and maybe its his way of hurting me. I am in such a dilema about it as if we are like this now, maybe we won't cut it through the whole process and we shouldn't be doing this. I am coming up 37 though and realise my time is running out and if i don't do it now, it probably won't happen. However having a child when one's relationship is on very rocky ground is probably a selfish thing to do. I am going to think about it today and probably approach him tonight. if he doesnt want this anymore with me, its best to find out now. Sigh

I don't think it is selfish to insist at all! You are getting towards crunch time, you really want this, and there is limited time to do it -- it gets so painfully straightforward. TCC'ing for a long period of time is not fun, so could you say the sooner he does this the sooner you get pregnant, and the focus on TTC will be over?

After 5 failed IUI's and a failed IVF, my guy finally went cold turkey the three days before his "donation" and it worked...with some help from assisted hatching, but it all contributes!

I agree that it takes alot to get through to men sometimes -- for example, with respect to TCC, despite me bringing it up every now and then, it did not occur to him at all there was a real time element, when I was 38, 39, 40, 41, then at 42 he sort of paid attention, and he's really paid attention this last time (at 43/44!!!). I wish I'd really hammered him over the head much earlier, honestly (even just on TTC). Maybe show him those charts that show how chances get worse over the years - show him how every bit of behavior change helps.

I don't want to contribute to your worry (you have a good bit of time left). I really think you are right to press it. Could be passive agressive behavior on his part, as you point out (or he didn't like the doctor), but in the end guys respond to simple, straightforward talk/instructions: they like to know how to address the unknown. Tell him you need to optimize the (limited?) NHS tries you get? Hope all this makes sense. Most importantly, do not feel selfish!

 

[Brambletess]

Thanks for all the advice, I will have a talk tonight. Not aggressively but in a nice manner and hope he gets on board. It seems a lot of us have problems with our men. Really good to hear how others approach it. We do love each other and want children together, its just been more difficult since the miscarriage but as Mary B said, its not long until treatment and we need to get our heads down and go for it. Although a lot of the problem lies with my blocked tubes, we don't why I miscarried and it could well be to do with the quality of the spem and/or eggs, so we need to concentrate on improving our chances. I am hopeful it will work as my pregnancy happened naturally dispite of severly blocked tubes and borderline sperm morphology so my body obviously wants to get pregnant and can.

So glad i have a lovely bunch of ladies to let rip to, feel free to vent to me as well.

 

[Mrs G]

Hope things go ok talking to oh tonight hun. Bloody men, I could strangle mine sometimes!! You gotta love em though!!??

 

[Mrs G]

Ooh forgot to ask. Got a high on cbfm today (cd10, bit early for me!!) now clinic have not put me on bcp, I did ask and they said no need. But should we be avoiding ov? Obviously chances are slim but what IF I get pg and then start taking d/regs??

 

[angelcakes]

angelcakes, those are my favourite two things as well. last christmas i made my husband a grotto, i cut out santa's feet all the way from the chimney and down the hall,and snow on the ground and got a santa that climbs in and out of a chimney.
i love it!! can't wait til we have our own kids.

vineyard- twins!! that's great. how are you feeling.

My-oh-my - you're gonna be the coolest mum. And I thought I liked Christmas.

 

[angelcakes]

Sammy2009 - Well how are you feeling now, is the away yet?

Wrightywales - Hey hun, not long to wait now. Fx for you

MaryB - I am soo sorry to hear that. You need to hang on in there, I wouldn't go to the miscarraige threads as you may spook yourself out. You need to stay positibe, PMA PMA PMA

Mrs G - Listened to the song - your a sappy git...but I like it. Ha, I'll now need to go and google the song I'll play to my embies...maybe my first dance!!!

Brambletess - Dont write him off just yet. He may just be stressed by the whole infertility thing (even though he'll not want to show it) and maybe thats why you are having some problems. I'm quite sure once all the stress ot TTC is away and you have your wee baby it'll all be fine

 

[Sammy2009]

Sammy2009 - Well how are you feeling now, is the away yet?

Wrightywales - Hey hun, not long to wait now. Fx for you

MaryB - I am soo sorry to hear that. You need to hang on in there, I wouldn't go to the miscarraige threads as you may spook yourself out. You need to stay positibe, PMA PMA PMA

Mrs G - Listened to the song - your a sappy git...but I like it. Ha, I'll now need to go and google the song I'll play to my embies...maybe my first dance!!!

Brambletess - Dont write him off just yet. He may just be stressed by the whole infertility thing (even though he'll not want to show it) and maybe thats why you are having some problems. I'm quite sure once all the stress ot TTC is away and you have your wee baby it'll all be fine

Hi, yes i did wonder if it stopped AF and it did! I feel stressed...

A problem.... They have told us to start Puregon on day 3.... Which Pûregon? We have 3 x boxes of Puregon 300 IE/0,36ml and 1 x box of Puregon 900 UI/1,08ml... we have to take 150ml of one of these and they both fit in the Puregon pen. I have had to take one of them or i wont be able to take my meds so its 50/50 if i have got the right one. I could cry.... they never told us there would be two kinds and now the hospital has closed until tomorrow (well closed for questions about this as they only open 2 hours a day for questions - the idiots!)

 

[MaryB]

Sammy, Well, that's confusing! I checked with my engineer DH (yay!) and it looks like the volumes are equal: three 300 boxes add up to one 900 (as you probably saw) and so **unless you can tell the concentrations are different** seems you can take 150 from one of the 300 or from the 900, either one.

And the reference to 36 and 108 (3 x 36) may be the measure of what's actually in the vials but stated in different units from what you are measuring the shot with, meaning there may be more in the 300 vial than your total 2 x 15 (actually, 150 unit) doses. That's the way it was with Follistim.

**I'm no nurse though*** if you can reach one, all the better...but this is your first day so there shouldn't be a danger of overstimulating if the measure ends up being wrong, just tell your doctor what you did.

 

[Sammy2009]

Sammy, Well, that's confusing! I checked with my engineer DH (yay!) and it looks like the volumes are equal: three 300 boxes add up to one 900 (as you probably saw) and so **unless you can tell the concentrations are different** seems you can take 150 from one of the 300 or from the 900, either one.

And the reference to 36 and 108 (3 x 36) may be the measure of what's actually in the vials but stated in different units from what you are measuring the shot with, meaning there may be more in the 300 vial than your total 2 x 15 (actually, 150 unit) doses. That's the way it was with Follistim.

**I'm no nurse though*** if you can reach one, all the better...but this is your first day so there shouldn't be a danger of overstimulating if the measure ends up being wrong, just tell your doctor what you did.

Hi Mary... thanks so much for putting such an effort to try and work it out for us.... Allan thought the same. We were going stir crazy trying to work it out. I blame the hospital for being informative. Allan blames himself as it was explained to him in Dutch and I dont understand the language! I think we took the right one. We took the lower dose. We will check with the hospital tomorrow just so we know we are right but i think you are correct in what you are saying. Thanks again for looking into that for us you are very kind.How are things with you? Really well I hope...

 

[Cupcake Queen]

Sammy - How frustrating, you poor thing! I am sure that you took the right one.

Mrs G- I would say no to having regs when pregnant, or the chance of being pregnant. I think you need to be avoiding ovulation at the moment - but that's just based on the advice I got from my FS.

 

[Cupcake Queen]

Had preliminary discussion with geneticist clinic today - they wanted some background family history. Only 5 days to go till our appointment!!! I have been waiting 6 weeks for this appointment......

 

[Lilly123]

Im back!!!! We found it!!

So baby is in uterus... we saw gestational sac and yolk.. thats all we can see at this stage.....

FS said she is so happy cause she was also worried that we did not see anything on monday and she thought it may be somewhere else.. but she is happy it is there!!


So there is 1 baby!!

I have a pic but my camera died.. so will recharge it and post a pic later.. not that u can see anything lol..

so i have my next scan in 2 weeks when we should see heartbeat... now FS said we just have to watch out for a missed miscarriage and if i can get through next weeks she is confident we will deliver baby.. so please baby stay...... i am not going to worry anymore.. now its time to enjoy this pregnancy... she said all looks fine and she is happy.. i guess if she was not she would do more bloods but she is not doing anymore so i guess now we have to wait another 2 weeks..

Oh yes.. so my mom sounded disappointed that it is not twins.. she said u could have got it over and done with

so all in all excited

thanks for your support girls.. these bloody doctors freaking us out!

 

[MaryB]

Fantastic, Tanya!!!

Sammy, Dutch! Navigating IVF terminology and decisions was tricky enough, I couldn't imagine doing it in a foreign language. lol

Cupcake Queen, Waiting can be the worst. Sounds like you are almost there though.

 

[akcher]

Fantastic news Tanya! Can't wait for your pic.

Sammy, I'm glad you got your meds straightened out.

Cupcake, what will they be testing for at the geneticist appt? BTW your kitty is adorable!

Brambletess - I hope your talk with your DH went well. I'm sure he will come around.