4 Leaf Clover IVF / ICSI Buddies

[bek74]

Hi Bek, so glad you found us hun

Thankyou very much

Welcome Bek!

Cupcake: everything crossed for tomorrow, thinking of you

Wrighty: sorry you've lost your PMA at the mo. I don't just find I have good and bad days with PMA - I have good and bad nano seconds! It's very exhausting isn't it! Don't beat yourself up about lack of symptoms, you may never get any signs except for the 2 pink lines but that's the most important sign! I do know what you mean about wanting to feel something / anything. FX for you.

Krissi: I was exactly the same when I was stimming. I've never cried so much, then laughed, then grumped, then cried, then laughed, then....! Not long for you now!

Mrs G: Hello PUPO Buddy!

to everyone else

Thanks for the welcome

 

[Cupcake Queen]

Thanks everyone for your well wishes - ET in a few hours.

Sammy - I think because of my PCOS and hence lower egg quality, they are more likely to have chromosomal problems - that is why women with PCOS are more likely to miscarry from chromosomal abnormalities. I wouldn't worry about you hun! You've been there before and it was all good, so no reason not to think this one won't be fine!

Although I am disappointed in the 3 that were abnormal, I guess this has saved me 3 miscarriages. I am just worried about the others that they couldn't analyse. I am just worried in general at the moment! THis stress isn't good for me.

 

[bek74]

Thanks everyone for your well wishes - ET in a few hours.

Sammy - I think because of my PCOS and hence lower egg quality, they are more likely to have chromosomal problems - that is why women with PCOS are more likely to miscarry from chromosomal abnormalities. I wouldn't worry about you hun! You've been there before and it was all good, so no reason not to think this one won't be fine!

Although I am disappointed in the 3 that were abnormal, I guess this has saved me 3 miscarriages. I am just worried about the others that they couldn't analyse. I am just worried in general at the moment! THis stress isn't good for me.

Good luck for the transfer today. I just finished reading your 54 page journal, and OMG the rollercoaster of emotions I could read in your posts, just made me cry, it brought back the memories of me after I had my tubes reversed and the disappointment.
Honey I pray this is YOUR moment....

Can I ask why you didn't go to North West and with Dr Watson?, he is much closer to you.

From reading your posts, your cycle with drugs seems different to the one he wants me on.

On the 10th Oct, I will be 21days into my current cycle and that is when he wants me to start the nasal spray, then around the 16th Oct he is predicting I will get my period. Then on day 5 of my period he wants me to start the injections.
Also he doesn't wait till the blastocyst stage (think thats the name) he implants when they are about 2-3days old, he feels that the body HELPS get the embrio to the blastocyst phase. Of course he has said, that if this round doesn't take, I could try waiting till they are around 5days old, but he prefers to implant them at 2-3days.
He is also hoping that I will produce around 15+ eggs and would be happy if we ended up with 8 embrios.

They did mention to me about all the fluids I have to drink and the sports drinks I need to have, but the fact you got so bloated and big is worrying me, lol. Hubby and I don't want anyone to know we are doing this because when I got my tubes reversed we had so many friends say " Oh why?, you already have 3 kids" and when each month I was gutted with disappointment, they kept saying " oh don't worry, you already have 3 kids, why bother having more"

For some reason people think because you already have kids, I shouldn't be feeling this way and get over it. Yes I am thankful for my 3 fantastic sons, they are 12 (13 in dec), 11 and 9 and they are great, but that doesn't change the HUGE gapping whole in my heart, that doesn't change the fact that I want more children, i don't feel complete yet.
I then get the comments " are you doing this for a daughter" I laugh and say yeah, I have had 2 operations, tests etc to get a girl. NO what i want is a healthy baby, yes I would love a daughter, but I would love a son just as much.

Ok sorry for getting away from the matter at hand, and that is YOU..

Good luck and again I having you in my thoughts babe

 

[Kelly9]

Hey all I am still around, busy and headachy from the clomid. Just waiting to O so I can wait for witch and get another shot at treatment. IN the mean time need reading glasses and have lots of school work to do.

For now I am resting though, my poor head.

 

[Cupcake Queen]

Aw Kel sorry to hear you are not feeling too good. Take care of you

Bek - I didn't go to Dr Watson at North West mainly because DH and I work full time in the city - so it's easy to go have lunch time appointments and scans in Spring Hill - this would be impossible if we were at North West without taking significant time off work (ie can't just 'pop out for coffee with a client' if I have to catch a bus to north west and then one back to town).

And I know what you mean about not being 'fulfilled'............I know that feeling all too well.

As for how transfer went - here is a post from my journal:
Embie Transfer Report
Ok - how things change over a number of days. Day 3 we had 9 potential embies - today at Day 5, only one had gone to blastocyst. This little embie was 'looking' good today so it was transferred, so I guess I am officially PUPO.

My mood is a bit sombre - I am not just 100% confident. What do I have to base this on? Well we were told that one of the other embies looked really good, but this was one which we had a genetic result on and it had abnormal chromosomes. So even though the embie looked fine and kept developing and doing the right thing, it can still have a sever chromosomal issue (in this case Turners Syndrome, which is what my first had).

I guess I can just keep hoping -that's all I've got. But doctor today confirmed that we got a whole lot of chromosomal issues due to bad quality eggs. I am not sure what else I can do to improve egg quality than acupuncture, good diet etc. I'm only 32 and find it absurd that I have such bad eggs at this age.

Anyways, not to take away from the fact I am PUPO - but all I can do is have my FX and hope and pray this one is a good one.

 

[NeyNey]

Oh honey, I hope like anything little one sticks Thinking of you
When do you have your confirmation BT?

 

[bek74]

I am glad it went well today and I will pray like heck that this little one sticks.
I am more scared now, cause I am 35 (36 in Jan) so my eggs could be stuffed.
Who are you seeing in Spring Hill?, isn't there QFG there also and a Monash clinic up there?

 

[Cupcake Queen]

Bek
I go to Life Fertility in Spring Hill.

https://www.lifefertility.com.au/

I do think QFG are also in Spring Hill but Dr Watson is only at North West. Dr Sterling who runs Life used to be at Monash.

Don't worry about your eggs! Mine are shite because I have PCOS, that's all. It's something I was born with and nothing I can take to fix it.

As you have 3 healthy boys, I am sure you have great eggs! A friend of mine is 44 and just had a healthy bub - so it's a bit random sometimes.

 

[bek74]

Bek
I go to Life Fertility in Spring Hill.

https://www.lifefertility.com.au/

I do think QFG are also in Spring Hill but Dr Watson is only at North West. Dr Sterling who runs Life used to be at Monash.

Don't worry about your eggs! Mine are shite because I have PCOS, that's all. It's something I was born with and nothing I can take to fix it.

As you have 3 healthy boys, I am sure you have great eggs! A friend of mine is 44 and just had a healthy bub - so it's a bit random sometimes.

If things don't work out (which I have just said a pray for you that it will, I hope God knows who Cupcake is, lol)
Have you considered Donor eggs? would that be an option for you? I know if need be it is something I would look into if I had to.
xxx

 

[lioness168]

Hi girls I wish you all well. I was wondering how everyone else has gone going through IVF and balancing work. Did work allow you to take the days needed for appointments, EC/ET as sick leave or did you have to take it as another form of leave? If anyone can give me an idea of how things work that would be great. Its just that I have found out my work has just told me I cannot take the time off needed (appointments, ec,et) as sick leave and I was wondering if this was standard. They also likened it to having cosmetic surgery!!!!!

 

[bek74]

Hi girls I wish you all well. I was wondering how everyone else has gone going through IVF and balancing work. Did work allow you to take the days needed for appointments, EC/ET as sick leave or did you have to take it as another form of leave? If anyone can give me an idea of how things work that would be great.

I don't work outside the home so I can't answer that question and as for the IVF journey, I got no idea, I am only about to start mine on the 10th.
I just wanted to wish you luck

 

[Mrs G]

Lots of luck cupcake

My PMA has gone MIA, please let me know if anyone spots it.......

 

[Cupcake Queen]

Bek - Donor eggs aren't really something we want. I want my own biological child as I already have a step-child, so have a little girl in my life that is DH's but not mine. Also, from what I understand getting donor eggs is quite hard and bit on the black market here in Oz! I had friends go through Dr Watson and they tried with donor eggs about 3 times and it didn't work - and they payed a bloody fortune for it!

Lioness - good question!! My clinic is 15 min away from my work - so I go to appointments and scan in my lunch hour or before work as they open early. As for EC - I take this as a sick day (because let's face it - going to hospital shouldn't be taken off your holidays!). My boss does not know what i am going through, so I haven't told him why I have been having a few sick days over the past few months, but as far as I'm concerned, it's none of his business. People get 'sick'. That's what sick leave is for.

As for ET - my first transfer was done on a day off (I get rostered days off) and then my 2nd transfer today on a Saturday. I'd recommend taking a day off for ET - up to you whether you take it as sick leave or annual leave - because you really need to put your feet up and rest.

Hope this helps.

 

[lioness168]

Yeah...well they wont accept an unfit for work Drs certificate as they want to know the reason (even if its non of their business) and if it has to do with IVF they wont allow me to take it as sick leave! DH and I will be making enquiries with the Association/union on Tuesday! And the hid of them to demean the whole procedure as well...I was in tears and lost it. I will probably take alot of annual leave and get away from work for awhile if they are going to be like this.

 

[Cupcake Queen]

Lioness that's awful! I am sure they can't do that. If you need to be hospitalised, which is what EC is, then they should not be expecting you to take this as a holiday! Definitely speak to the Union I am sure that is illegal. If they want a reason why you need a sick day off tell them that you need to go to hospital, to go under sedation to get a bloody needle through your vaginal wall to your ovaries to burst follicles and collect eggs. That should be enough for them!!! It's a hospital trip and even if you were having plastic surgery- sick leave is sick leave to take especially when you go to hospital. Sorry - just quite vexed about this.

Do you mind me asking what you do or what industry you are in?

 

[lioness168]

Feel free to be vexed...as we are also!!!!! As if going through IVF isn't stressful enough. Believe it or not I am in forensics with the *** ****** *****!!!! DH and I are fuming. When I was told this I burst into tears and vented to my senior (and I am very private and don't cry infront of other people and keep it together). So DH rang industrial relations who confirmed that I am not allowed to take any time off for IVF as sick leave...even post sedation!!!!!!!!!! And DH rang the IVF clinic and they were also furious as they have never had any problems like this before! Sorry to vent and not have a PMA about it...but I am quite upset over it. I feel frustrated, undervalued and totally unsupported.

 

[Cupcake Queen]

Hmmm........I would talk to the Union. The police unions are some of the toughest fighters out there. It's discrimination basically. I'm sorry you have to deal with this on top of the whole IVF palaver. You would think the public service/police/gov't would be easier than the private industry.

I don't see why they need a reason on your medical certificate - that's an invasion of privacy. My medical certificate for Monday's EC was simply "needed hospitalisation'. That's it. My certificate for first EC was even more vague - i think the nurse did it and just put "suffering from a medical condition".

Good luck with talking to Union - let us know what happens.

Hope your stims are going ok!

 

[bek74]

Feel free to be vexed...as we are also!!!!! As if going through IVF isn't stressful enough. Believe it or not I am in forensics with the NSW Police Force!!!! DH and I are fuming. When I was told this I burst into tears and vented to my senior (and I am very private and don't cry infront of other people and keep it together). So DH rang industrial relations who confirmed that I am not allowed to take any time off for IVF as sick leave...even post sedation!!!!!!!!!! And DH rang the IVF clinic and they were also furious as they have never had any problems like this before! Sorry to vent and not have a PMA about it...but I am quite upset over it. I feel frustrated, undervalued and totally unsupported.

Take it to the media, that should shame the Police Force out.

No really, I don't know what you can do other than just take some leave. I feel you will be going through enough with IVF that your body doesn't need anymore stress on it.
Do what is less stressful for you, it may not be right and yes you should fight it, but maybe it isn't worth it. Maybe taking leave, being relaxed will help your chances with IVF..
Good luck

 

[lioness168]

I really appreciate the support as I do feel really upset over it all. I will probably take the whole month off as annual leave because I am so stressed about it. I want to be as relaxed as possible so I have the highest chance of success. I will still get Drs certificates and go through the union and try and get some of the time off reimburse as sick leave. I don't want to get too stressed during the cycle...otherwise its all pointless!!!

 

[bek74]

Bek - Donor eggs aren't really something we want. I want my own biological child as I already have a step-child, so have a little girl in my life that is DH's but not mine. Also, from what I understand getting donor eggs is quite hard and bit on the black market here in Oz! I had friends go through Dr Watson and they tried with donor eggs about 3 times and it didn't work - and they payed a bloody fortune for it!

I also have a step daughter, although she turned 18 in April of this year.

I don't know what the success rate is for donor eggs, or the costs. I just saw the sign at the clinic.

For me the difference would be that I was carrying the child, I would bond, I would give birth and it would be mine. An egg alone won't survive, a fertilised egg won't grow into a baby without the love and warmth of a mother. In that case that would be me, that would make the baby mine.
I think my opinion is different because I am an adopted child, as is my brother and we never felt any less our mothers children, we didn't grow up feeling second best, feeling adopted (if that makes sense), if anything we felt really wanted.

I so want this to work for you, I so want this to be your month. After reading your journal (all 54pages, lol) I could feel your excitement and then your pain and disappointment. I want this to stick, I will pray every night that it does.
xxx