40+ and Trying for 1st? Join in!!

[FlyFlorida]

41. TTC #1 since 2009. IVF attempt #3 w/DE. Last two with same donor (25 mature eggs but only fert 6 eggs at a time because we didn't want to risk frosties). This time my friend from out of state agreed to be our gestational carrier. I was told after last cancelled cycle (hours prior to fert) that I was going to need a carrier.

This cycle, 19 eggs left and they were going to thaw eggs until they had 6 good ones. They only needed to thaw six because all 6 looked good. Day 1 only three fertilized (first IVF last Sep 5 fert, 2 perfect embryos on day 5. Extremely difficult transfer-45 min attempt, sent away with Cytotec and came back in PM for another attempt. 30 mins later they were in. BFN. Emb said due to difficulty getting to uterus prob caused them to attrit). Day 3 of this cycle (day b4 yest), one 8 cell normal and other two were 4 cell. Flew carrier and her mom in yesterday. Otw to clinic this AM and embryologist called and said they all arrested. Devastating. I don't know how to tell my husband. He is in the middle of some extreme training for work out of state and has a test tomorrow. This sucks! I've been trying to do what God would have me do and am respecting Him and life. I don't know why the answer continues to be, No. We don't have any more money for this. I'm trying to hang tough for my friend and her mom who were visibly devastated when I got the call. I'm trying to use humor to create levity!

Here's to all you out there hanging tough! Lots of us feel the same pain!

 

[Vonn]

Flyflorida--Welcome! So sorry for all your troubles. That's a lot of heartache, though it's wonderful that you have such generous people in your life to be a gestational carrier. I hope you get that one health baby someday soon!

Myonechance--I hope the final days of stims and triggering has gone well. Grow little follies, grow!

Pussycat--I hope everything is going well for you, I assume your DE transfer cycle is underway?

Jean--Diaper cakes are so cute! I hope yours turned out well, I've never made one myself.

Terri--Happy birthday, my dear!

Weezy & Clizard--I hope you are both well.

AFM--Nothing happening here, just avoiding actually working, hassling with the insurance company; you know, the usual.

 

[Pussycat1]

Flyflorida, welcome and so sorry to hear your story. I hope you've found a way around telling your loved ones.
Vonn, good to hear from you. Yes started this cycle. I have an Intralipd infusion on Friday, then Sat I have a scan to measure my endometrial lining. If it measures 7mm, I'm good to go and FET the following Sat 30th. We're going to have both frozen embryos put back, it increases the chance by 10% and if we only go for one and it fails I'll always wonder what if. We have to give this cycle everything. At the moment I'm on Estrogen, corticosteroids (25mg) and baby aspirin. Progesterone injections start Monday and I'm dreading them. xx

 

[myonechance]

FlyFlorida, My heart ached reading your story. I don't have many words but that I will keep you in my prayers. My first ER retrieval is tomorrow so I am a true newbie at all this but you sound like a very strong person! And as far as using humor..... that is exactly what i do. In fact, I've said in the past to family that if I CAN'T laugh at something then you better look out! LOL

 

[Jean40]

The diaper cake turned out great and I got it to coworker right before she left on maternity leave. She was contracting all day yesterday, went to L&D after work & they sent her home. She's been contracting all day today, but they aren't getting closer together, staying about 10 minutes apart, her water hasn't broke, and she wasn't dilated enough. She has until midnight tonight to deliver and then I win the Baby Pool, lol, so I want her to get going. Tomorrow, they are having another baby shower at work, but I don't really know this girl that well (she works in another area), so I'm not going.

The only symptoms I'm having are extreme tiredness and today, I just felt off, yuck, not right. If I can hold long enough by morning, I'll test again. Not sure I can do another IUI next month, money is just too tight unless the loan comes through. I'm already thinking about maybe doing donor embryo as a next step. I have to ask RE about it because they don't advertise it on their website, but I did see on another site that they do it. I know their fresh IVF cycle is minimum $8600, FET is $2500. Donor embryo is something I've thought about since I read an article about it last year. I know a lot of places don't do it.

 

[Clizard]

Jean, what is a diaper cake???? I am intrigued, please tell me what, why, and how!
Hello to all and welcome Florida. Gotta love a bit of humour, sometimes it's the only thing that gets us through.
Terri, thinking of you and hoping great things are afoot for your birthday
Pussycat, I bet you'll surprise yourself and cope wonderfully with those injections.
Vonn, always lovely to see your wedding photo (I presume?) and thanks for thinking of me.
Good luck myonechance, lets hope that everything goes smoothly and you get some great follies.
How is everyone else that I've forgotten?
For some reason, the last 3 months have me feeling like I'm 35 (not the 45 I'm turning in November). Not sure if it is all the good living, the holiday or just general happy mood? Also, my body/cycle is behaving like it did pre-mmc 2 years ago. Even more to be grateful about.

 

[Jean40]

Diaper cake instructions: https://www.ehow.com/video_5116673_make-diaper-cake.html?ref=Track2&utm_source=ask

I did not test this morning, couldn't hold it that long. Maybe tomorrow.

 

[Pussycat1]

Myonechance, how did the Egg collection go? x

 

[myonechance]

Pussycat1, thanks for asking ...........

Well, ER went ok. Apparently it was a "very difficult retrieval". The doctor said he almost cancelled during. There was a very large amount of scar tissue from all my bowel resections and it was difficult to get the needle through to the L ovary. He persisted and he was able to retrieve 3 eggs. I will be doing a great amount of praying tonight. He couldn't access my R side(it was not growing anyway). So all in all, 3 is better than 0! I am in more discomfort than I anticipated. Hoping i can sleep. The pain pills they gave me don't seem to be working. I'm nervous and excited to hear form my doctor tomorrow ....he said between 12-3... I will be on pins and needles.... It's weird....I'm not sure how to feel. Its sort of anti-climatic. So many weeks prepping for today. Now I am sitting in the hotel with DH watching BigBangTheory....and we can't even have some "fun" lol.. Poor thing he tried to give me a massage but I'm just feeling so poopy. Tomorrow is a another day!

 

[Pussycat1]

Myonechance, it sounds like you've been through the wringer with this one. Hope you're feeling better? As you say 3 is better than 0 and to be honest over the age of 40, we know the numbers decline, I only ever got 3 or 4.... Are you having ICSI or IVF? Any updates in how many have fertilised? Have the talked to you about ET and whether they anticipatd difficulties, forewarned is forearmed. Keep us posted. x

 

[myonechance]

Pussycat1, they fertilized yesterday with ICSI and today I've got 2 embryos that they are planning to transfer Sunday or Monday. scary and exciting at the same time. They haven't mentioned any transfer issues. I just know theres a chance they won't stick but all we wanted was a chance I've been in this hotel for 2 weeks and what I'm really looking forward to doing is getting home and back to my normal routines! I miss my kitty cats as well!

 

[terripeachy]

Awesome news!! Keep us updated.

 

[Pussycat1]

Myonechance, I've got everything crossed for you. It's a tough journey but hopefully this will be it for you. Where are you being treated?
Terri, how are you doing?
AFM, had my Intralipd infusion today, all fine. Scan tomorrow so fingers crossed my lining is 7mm, I've never really been more then 7.5-8 in the past so got everything crossed. xx

 

[myonechance]

Myonechance, I've got everything crossed for you. It's a tough journey but hopefully this will be it for you. Where are you being treated?
Terri, how are you doing?
AFM, had my Intralipd infusion today, all fine. Scan tomorrow so fingers crossed my lining is 7mm, I've never really been more then 7.5-8 in the past so got everything crossed. xx

Thanks Pussycat1! Ive got mine crossed for you as well! I am being treated at Shady Grove in the D.C. area.

 

[myonechance]

Uhhgg! I am sosososososo bloated! any advice? 2 1/2 days post ER. I couldn't button my cute summer skirts today. I am super uncomfortable. It's not really painful per-say...Just so bloated and tight. I want to visit some sights in DC tomorrow but geez i can't fit into my shorts or skirts I brought. Sitting is rediculously not working for me. Laying down I can't get comfortable.

 

[Vonn]

Chance--I hear the bloating can be really bad, don't ya wish they would've told you that? Ugh, no fun to have to wear too-tight clothes. Maybe find a cheap pair of leggings and go see some memorials!?! I hope both of those little embies are growing, growing, growing! Can't wait to hear how the transfer goes. GL!! I'm curious about why you went to a fertility clinic all the way in D.C. when you live in the Midwest?

Pussycat--I hope all goes well at your scan tomorrow. Please, Pussycat's lining, be at least 7mm! I totally agree about putting both back in, can't leave anything on the table, so to speak.

Jean--I hope this is your cycle, but if it isn't, I'm curious to see what your next steps are. It seems like every time I go to the dr they drop hints about how crap my numbers are and how I should maybe consider donor eggs. I am trying to prepare myself for going in that direction. MY DH has perfectly fine sperm, so I don't think we'd go with a donor embryo, even though it may be cheaper. But who knows where we'll end up. Anyway, I'll be rooting for you know matter what you do next!

Clizzard--that is so awesome that you are feeling youthful. Truly amazing! The opposite really sucks, I've been there with my hypothyroidism.

AFM--I'm biding my time until next cycle, though I'd be overjoyed to be proven wrong about this cycle! Haha. Doubt it.

Have a great weekend, ladies!

 

[terripeachy]

Myonechance-the only way I know to get rid of that bloating is to drink Gatorade. I drank a lot of it and I was still bloated after retrieval. Loose clothes for sure. If you're in DC you can find some cheap clothes/leggings to wear around town. Hope you are able to enjoy your visit. The weather is beautiful this weekend.

Vonn-no matter what process we are in, there are always a million things to think about. Can't we just get a break and let our minds rest? It's irritating. I am looking forward to Wednesday and your surprise blood test.

Pussycat-I hope your lining is exactly where it needs to be today.

 

[Jean40]

I was told to drink plenty of fluids and also to increase my protein, which really helped with my bloating.

this morning on FRER, don't feel anything really, no sign of AF yet. Going to go visit my coworker and her 9 pound baby she had yesterday evening, 8 days overdue. We all thought she would have a c-section, but they finally found something to make her dilate. Ouch!

I'm going to ask RE about something other than clomid because it has lactose in it and even though I'm taking lactase enzymes with it, it's messing up my gut. It wasn't so bad first cycle, but second cycle was/still is messed up. I can't handle cow dairy, but I can tolerate goat and sheep cheese using lactase enzymes. I don't have a dairy allergy (I was tested for that in Nov), but a cow dairy intolerance.

I'm once again looking at the money to see if I can swing another IUI cycle, might be able to do it but I really need that loan to come through, they said they would notify me by second week of June. I keep checking my bank account to see if anything has been deposited, the only thing I see is my tax refund deposited (which DOES help a little!).

 

[terripeachy]

Sorry for the bfn, Jean.

 

[myonechance]

pussycat- i hope your scan went well and that your lining is doing fantastic!

Jean- I'm sorry to read that you had a BFN How interesting about clomid and dairy. I had no idea. I hope that your doctor can work with you to find a better med solution. And hopefully your loan will come through

Vonn- I hope that as you are biding your time for your cycles that you whatever you decide (donor, etc) that you find comfort. it's a big step(at least it seems like to would be) Im sure you will do what you feel is right! You're doctor can hint all he wants but its ultimately your decision so you do it in your own time

terri- yes the weather was great today. I was able to get to Arlington Cemetery and do a good amount of walking. I have a few friends whose husbands are buried there so it meant a lot to get back there. I am planning to get into DC to see the disabled veterans memorial (my DH is 100%disabled due to his traumatic brain injury(Army) and to the national police memorial (my dad) then maybe the air and space museum. love that place I want to name a daughter Amelia after Amelia Earhart. She was fearless!

Following all you ladies and reading what you all have gone through with multiple cycles, whether it is IUI, IVF, natural cycles, etc..I give you so much credit. Truly. Not only is is a lot financially, but so many emotional costs as well. This one IVF cycle has taken a lot out of me, so hats off to y'all and your perseverance!!


AFM- thank you for all the advice about the bloating. Its a tad better but not much. I am very impatient so, my transfer is tomorrow at 915. I'm quite anxious but I am feeling optimistic. Do you think it would be Ok to rest for a few hours and then do some walking/sightseeing? No strenuous activity. Just casual walking. We fly back to WI Monday morning and I am super happy about that. Ahhhh.. to sleep in my own bed.

I hope y'all have a blessed rest of your weekend!