A group for TTC#1 and had more than one loss?

[lexi374]

Patiently you still have a great chance you dont know exactly when you ov and the egg lives 12-24 hrs after being released, you got the job done you'll be fine, id do today aswell. Dont forget youve probs still got some up there from tues. I had to practically beg dh last week as he felt tired and a bit crap, its a pain aint it! Theyve only got 1 job to do weve got the next 9 months!!

 

[patiently]

Patiently hang in there! I go through this same thing most months! Last time it was a school night and he told me he'd wake me up later. By the time 11pm rolled round I was fit to be tied! I told him it was inconsiderate of him and after that he was better! HELLO I am trying to make a healthy baby here! Keeping me up late waiting is not helping me stay calm cool and collected! Men! Sometimes we can't live with em, sometimes we can't live without em! Be patient patiently! I am sure many of us can relate and understand your frustration!

Afm - tomorrow is my last day to clomid! So far so good. The last 4 days have been fine. Should I be concerned if I have no side effects? Should I prepare for more the more cycles I have to take it?

Hope everyone else is keeping well! Chin up!

i never got s/e until after i stopped taking clomid tbh...but either way the s/e dont mean that its working...lots of women have had so many s/e and never ovulated and others had no s/e and ended up with twins....so dont read too much into it hun and id say your lucky because the hot flashes are a bit annoying sometimes...gl hun im sure clomid will work and in 5 days you could be in your fertile period...hope you get your bfp on your first clomid cycle

AJ - Hope the Clomid works for you! I just started today, and didn't have any side effects. I'm worried the same thing - that if I don't get side effects that it won't work. Hopefully it works for both of us!

hun im sure the clomid is working s/e dont mean that its working...will you be charting or using opks...hope this is also your month hun...

Patiently you still have a great chance you dont know exactly when you ov and the egg lives 12-24 hrs after being released, you got the job done you'll be fine, id do today aswell. Dont forget youve probs still got some up there from tues. I had to practically beg dh last week as he felt tired and a bit crap, its a pain aint it! Theyve only got 1 job to do weve got the next 9 months!!

so true i hope i have done enough but we'll see...i was stressing so much but now whatever happens happens i guess...how are things on your side? how many dpo are you any symptoms yet x x

to all the other ladies thank you for your support i dont know what id do without you all...and hope we get some bfps in the next few weeks sending sticky baby dust to all...x

 

[Ladyfog]

Patiently, please don't worry. You already BD'd on Tuesday and you're meant to BD for 3 days after a +ve OPK so you're still on schedule! A couple of hours won't hurt as that egg's got to make it's way down the fallopian tubes and the sperm can meet it at any point on this journey (biology lesson over!). Unless you have super speedy eggs, it'll be fine!

Sorry, I don't know anything about Clomid but common sense tells me that s/e won't mean it's been successful or not. Good luck guys!

AFM, just got a letter from the hospital this morning to confirm that the rest of the tests from the CVS have come back normal! We're so relieved!! We've passed another hurdle!! Only the scan on the 23rd to get through now to check baby's heart! I really hope this baby is going to be OK - I don't want to have to say goodbye.

 

[Tweak0605]

Patiently - Glad you're feeling better I'm charting and doing OPKs! I'm going all out this cycle. My temps have been hovering right around the same right now, which is good since they've been quite rocky the past couple cycles.

Lady - SO glad the tests came back normal!! Woohoo!!

 

[patiently]

Looks like im going to be out again this month my OH has refused to bd today...he didnt want to this morning and kept telling me to just wait till his ready...so i left as im upset...when i said i'll come back he said no...and to just deal with the outcome...im so upset how can someone who wants to have a baby act like this what is wrong with men...sometimes i think it would be so much easier to just go to a sperm bank and pick up what you needed when you needed it...I give up..it feels like im ighting this battle by myself and he's so stubborn he wont see past me walking out...im so annoyed but i will still ttc as that is my ultimate goal to have a baby...argh sorry ladies im not much of a ray of sunshine atm

Ladyog im so pleased for you that is amazing news...you really do give the rest of us ladies hope... x x x

 

[ayclobes]

Pretty sure i'll start the opks when i stop bleeding..im cd5 and its still going strong..so we'll see.

 

[Ladyfog]

Looks like im going to be out again this month my OH has refused to bd today...he didnt want to this morning and kept telling me to just wait till his ready...so i left as im upset...when i said i'll come back he said no...and to just deal with the outcome...im so upset how can someone who wants to have a baby act like this what is wrong with men...sometimes i think it would be so much easier to just go to a sperm bank and pick up what you needed when you needed it...I give up..it feels like im ighting this battle by myself and he's so stubborn he wont see past me walking out...im so annoyed but i will still ttc as that is my ultimate goal to have a baby...argh sorry ladies im not much of a ray of sunshine atm

Ladyog im so pleased for you that is amazing news...you really do give the rest of us ladies hope... x x x

Thank Patiently - FX my good luck will continue!

Does DH understand the 'technicalities' of TTC? I was lucky that DH was always willing and able (think he was just happy to get the chance to BD!) but he also knew that we had a short window of opportunity to make it happen. If he does but is still refusing, then have you talked to him about how he's feeling at the moment? I know he's being an idiot but is there a reason he's finding excuses? If he's just tired, could you just just have quickies sometimes and save the romance for when he's got more energy? We did a mixture and it was a good option if we were both knackered e.g hop on, do the job, go and watch TV!! If it's a no go this month, then you could try booking BDs in the diary next month so he can be ready for action?! You could even arrange some dates (or book a day off work?) so you get some quality time together during your fertile period. He's less likely to be tired and you're less likely to get all emotional at him! I hope these ideas help - I hate to see you all upset and sorry DH is being so difficult - you'd think he'd be happy it was time to get busy!!

 

[Neversaynever]

I'm so peeved, typed a massive post at lunchtime at work but it obviously didn't post

On my phone so just wanted to stop by and send you all , will try and post something properly later or over the weekend

XxX

 

[FloridaGirl21]

Looks like im going to be out again this month my OH has refused to bd today...he didnt want to this morning and kept telling me to just wait till his ready...so i left as im upset...when i said i'll come back he said no...and to just deal with the outcome...im so upset how can someone who wants to have a baby act like this what is wrong with men...sometimes i think it would be so much easier to just go to a sperm bank and pick up what you needed when you needed it...I give up..it feels like im ighting this battle by myself and he's so stubborn he wont see past me walking out...im so annoyed but i will still ttc as that is my ultimate goal to have a baby...argh sorry ladies im not much of a ray of sunshine atm

Ladyog im so pleased for you that is amazing news...you really do give the rest of us ladies hope... x x x

My DH did the same thing a few times.. And I ended up bribing him this last cycle that we got our bfp.. He had been wanting something bad, so I agreed that he could get it if we could That was the day before my O day & he agreed to BD for 3 days straight so that he could get this "toy" he had been wanting. He just hadn't been in the mood I guess Men are so frustrating sometimes! Is he going to BD today w/ you?

 

[lexi374]

Lady im so pleased for you i just know everything is going to perfect this time x

Patiently you're not out hun, you still bed at the right time. Men really are a pain in the arse sometimes! I think lady had all the best advice for you, so cant really add anymore than that x

Im 7/8 dpo had a few pains around my ovaries, no symptoms, think itll be another month of ttc!

Good luck to those gearing up to ov or in tww x

 

[NewToAllThis]

Patiently - no words of wisdom as think Lady said it all but just wanted you to know you're not on your own. My DH does this a lot, including the last few days. My opk is slowly turning positive and my ovaries are aching so I know ov is imminent. I know it only takes the once but the last bfp I got, we dtd every other day and every day at ov (this never happened before and was only cos we were on holiday!) and low and behold it worked.
Not sure if it was you that asked the Conceive Plus question, but I also used that the month I got my bfp too. I had been using it for a couple of months previously but I inserted it with a syringe that month. Not sure if it was coincidence or not
I like it as feel I don't get much ewcm around ov and it makes things a bit easier iykwim!

Lady - excellent news regarding your test results. You must be so relieved. One question - are they able to tell the sex from the cvs results? I assume you're not finding out just yet if you can?

NSN - hope you're doing well hun and Oopsie is growing well

Bells - let us know when you test again. Keeping everything crossed for a nice dark line

Hi to everyone else.

AFM - have come to bed in a strop as DH is being a twat (no better word for him I'm afraid)

 

[patiently]

Lexi you never know sometimes hardly any symptoms are bfp symptoms...do you normally get symptoms in the tww...when will you be testing i'm really hoping that this is our month! FC or you hun!! GL!

Florida you have a good idea with the bribes...i would try that if i thought it would work but with my OH i dont think it'll work...but i can try it i guess...lol x how are you doing hun? hope things are going well...you actually give me faith in Clomid! so thank you for that!

NSN its such a bugger when that happens! lol...hope all is well x x

Ladyfog!! wow you are amazing...thank you so much for all the suggestions!! My Oh knows the technicalities of ttc i even made him promise to cooperate this cycle...I told him that we need to bd for three days from my positive opk! he knows the ins and outs! we talked today and he said " we are too young to try so hard...we should just let it happen and if i carry on like the way i have been then it will eventually break us up!" can you believe his nerve...i have made sacrafice after sacrafice for my OH! I am willing to wait for him to pursue his chosen career in the army and be committed and faithful to him at all times, I run up and down for him most of the time...and all i ever ask is that we bd during my fertile period...I felt like a failure as a woman before but even more so now especially when he says were too young to be trying so hard...that we shouldnt have to face problems like this until were in our 30's. I asked him if he still wants to ttc and he said yes but without all the charting, testing and bd! how he thinks that will happen is beyond me...but im so exhausted from being around my younger sister who constantly complains about her pregnancy and my OH stressing me out by not cooperating with me that I actually cant go on like this! ladies im so so so so sorry for always venting a long essay on here...its just i cant talk to anyone else...my OH is fed up with me and people who havent had a loss generally dont understand the desire to become pg again asap! anyway sorry again ladies...i really do hope that January will be an amazing month with lots of BFP and 2012 will be a fantastic baby filled year for us all...

 

[Ladyfog]

NTAT - In answer to your question, they can find out the sex and we do want to know but they seem to have forgotten to tell us! If I'm honest I'm not to bothered at the moment as I know I'll find out eventually and I'm kind of enjoying the suspense! I'll let you all know when I finally find out.

And for DH being a twat. Hopefully he'll buck his ideas up in the next couple of days!

Lexi - 7/8 dpo is still early and no symptoms means nothing. Both me and RM were sure we were out just before our BFPs so you never know!

Patiently, I'm going to say something radical now...I think you should do what OH wants! Now hear me out, I haven't gone mad!...just take the pressure off him for a month or two and make it less about TTC and more about having fun for a while. Reading between the lines I think your OH is feeling wanted just for his sperm! I know that you have given him a lot and made sacrifices, but I also think that you are in danger of ruining the whole TTC experience for both of you because you want this so badly. You may find that by enjoying yourselves without the pressure you will get more BDing and get that BFP quicker in the end!

I think OH is just feeling a bit pressured, but goodness knows I understand how you feel about wanting to get pregnant again, you just need him on side and in the mood! If you haven't got your BFP this month (FX for you!), give him time off from the temping and OPKs etc - he doesn't have to know when your fertile time is - don't tell him. If he's anything like my DH he won't have a clue anyway! Just get some strategically timed nights out in the diary, buy some sexy undies and a few toys (if that's your thing!) and have some fun! Your OH will hopefully look forward to jumping into bed rather than feeling like it's a military manoeuvre (sorry for the pun).

Wow - sorry, that was a lot of advice Just don't want to see you unhappy. You can ignore any of this as you think necessary!

Look at me, I'm up late! Need to go to bed now though

 

[August79]

Hey everybody I'm a "lurker" to this thread. We've had two loses and my gyno doesn't want us to try until we've had testing. Unfortunately I'm not working and my husband's insurance plan is so expensive we might as well not have any. So we're in limbo right now. It breaks my heart

I want to comment for Patiently though. My husband was the exact same way about ttc. He said he wanted to but then did not want to bd on the important days. I talked with him about how important the window was and he would say he understood and we would but when those days rolled around, nothing. We had many discussions about it and he would say he did not feel pressured and that he truly did want a baby. Well our fifth month of trying, I said we were on a break. I was tired of the stress. Now you ladies know you don't turn off that awareness of your fertile period *just like that* so of course I tried for the bd'ing and we hit like 5 times within our fertile window. Before it would be two times if I was lucky. I got my BFP that month

So just wanting to chime in and agree with Ladyfog. Take a break. My husband is aware of my cycles so he had to know in the back of his mind that week was a fertile week but without me saying anything about ttc he was much more relaxed and in the mood. If you want to PM and talk more, feel free.

Big to the other ladies also yay to Ladyfog for good news!!

 

[NewToAllThis]

Hey August79
Welcome and sorry for your losses. Glad you decided to introduce yourself.
We're all here to support each other in our journey

 

[August79]

Thanks NTAT. Since my last m/c I don't know where I fit in on the board. I'm not truly ttc and I don't feel like I relate to most in the WTT forum. I've tried posting in the m/c support but sometimes the rawness of what they're going through brings it all back. My last m/c was in Sept actually both of m/c took place in Sept just a year apart first one in 2010 then 2011. So I lurk here and read a few journals. I love how supportive everybody is on this thread.

Sorry your husband is being an ass. I know my husband can frustrate me like no other!

 

[Ladyfog]

Welcome August So sorry for your losses but very glad you have come to join us. We'll support you however we can, no matter where you are in your TTC journey

How come the Dr doesn't want you to try again? Do they know why you MC'd? In the UK we are only tested after 3 as it is thought of as quite normal to have 2 MCs (although it doesn't feel very 'normal' does it?!). Here I am, with hopefully a successful pregnancy after 2 MMCs so I guess it might be worth trying anyway??

 

[Neversaynever]

NTAT... for your hubby begin a twat

Lady...so so happy for you that all is clear

Patiently... and lady and the others have some really good advice. After our first loss, OH didn't want to know when I was O'ing. When we had rudies, he asked me why I never put my legs up the wall, I said it wasn't the right time. He wasn't happy about that because he too wants a child as much as I do so he told me I need to write it on the calendar so I did. He then really struggled to perform and this happened for he next couple of months. He couldn't cope with the pressure and most of the time when I was fertile, you could guarantee that he was really tired, stressed at work, back was hurting etc so I threw in the towel and said stuff it (in a not so polite way!) I refused to opk and he knew that and went by my bodily signs which I had been monitoring and that month I got pregnant the pressure we put ourselves and OH's under is ridiculous. I do understands your need to get pregnant...I was there for four months feeling the same. Although I said I wasn't tracking to my OH...we have all educated ourselves enough to know roughly when we are ovulating and it took the pressure off us. I have done one opk since that loss and that is all. I never used them for the last loss or this pregnancy. No legs up the wall nothing. My only thing that I make sure I do is have an orgasm to help the swimmers and I am always first to the bathroom. We are all here chucking you support and

All you clomid chicks...doesn't clomid screw up opk's or am I wrong?

August...don't lurk hun if you feel you fit in here then chat away no matter where you are in your journey, I hate to think you're feeling left out and you have nowhere to go

Lexi...7/8 DPO...only this time did I have obvious symptoms, nothing in my other pregnancies

AJ...you ok?

to everyone...RM, you still good?

XxX

 

[lexi374]

Welcome August

Patiently my bf oh was the same as some of the others have mentioned on here, felt the pressure at the fertile time and couldnt finish, the more this happened the more cross she got and so the more it happened. He told her he never wanted to hear the 'o' word again! She didnt tell him her fertile time this month, he thought it was over xmas but it was the week before and lo and behold she pregnant! I hope you are ok hun x

Nsn not long til your scan now, how are you feeling? Still having a few symptoms?

Hi to everyone else hope you have a great weekend

 

[NewToAllThis]

Thanks NTAT. Since my last m/c I don't know where I fit in on the board. I'm not truly ttc and I don't feel like I relate to most in the WTT forum. I've tried posting in the m/c support but sometimes the rawness of what they're going through brings it all back. My last m/c was in Sept actually both of m/c took place in Sept just a year apart first one in 2010 then 2011. So I lurk here and read a few journals. I love how supportive everybody is on this thread.

Sorry your husband is being an ass. I know my husband can frustrate me like no other!

We're quite similar as my two losses were virtually a year apart and at the same sort of time as yours (see my siggy)

I think you fit here very well - so if you feel comfortable here, please stay.
I'm not truly TTC either tbh, as I haven't had first AF since ERPC yet (surgery was 6th October )