Adoption journey

[dreamofabean]

Oh rainy how very, very exciting!!! How old are they Hun? Eek!! X

 

[aimze]

Rainy that's amazing news! Woooop

Can you give any details of rough ages of your lovely raindrops?

X

 

[Rainy123]

They are 2 and 6 and just perfect for me. It is likely to be slow going because the older boy will need a lot or preparation work (which may lead to delays) but probably looking at panel late June. Fingers crossed!

 

[aimze]

Rainy that's fantastic! so happy for you Hun!

Not long until you can shop shop shop! X

 

[dreamofabean]

Ah how fantastic rainy! So excited for you honey! X

 

[Monkey78]

Hi everyone,

Rainy- that is wonderful news, you so deserve it. Im so excited for you.

Aimze - Sorry about those nasty comments, nobody really understands what we are all going through. Some of my family won't watch the programmes that are on, and I find it really frustrating as it may actually open their eyes to understand how emotional the whole process is!

On a brighter note tho hun - not long for you until panel is it?

Lolly/Dream - I love to read about your little ones, they sound like they are doing grand with their new mommies. Sorry to hear little Pink has chicken pox Lolly, poor little mite, how is she?

Our SW rang late last week to confirm our consent to go on the national adoption register, there are not any little ones matching our criteria on our consortium register and it may be a wait so we agreed we should go national. So excited..... She has said there is a relinquished baby being born in July which she will run by us once she has more information, but we have said that for us to consider going down that road, would be dependent on absolute exceptional circumstances. We are realistic and dont want to go through anymore loss in our lives. But we shall see. Any views on relinquished babies??

xx

 

[aimze]

Hey monkey! Great to hear from you!

Would you do foster to adopt with the baby born in July? If not you could be looking at another 4months for court paper work and then some...also, dependant on circumstances a lot of birth mums change their minds once the baby is born..

Sorry that sounds really negative i didn't mean to sound like that...I think it could be risky business but the rewards if it worked out would mean a very young baby!!!

Have you looked on be my parent or children who wait?

X

 

[Monkey78]

Yes I think that would be the case, and that is why we are very cautious to it all. It really would depend on the BM's circumstances and whether there was a pretty much near on 100% chance of her not changing her mind. We won't rule it out, but its not top choice for us.

I have been looking at both those websites, thanks hun, lots of older children on there, it does make it a longer wait when you want a small one.

 

[Monkey78]

sorry I meant young one rather than small one LOL !

 

[aimze]

I know what you mean...a little boy, 8months that we missed out on at pre linking was on there, couldn't believe it when we saw him as he's just an average month!

I hope they find you a link soon Hun, what age are you lookin upto?

X

 

[Rainy123]

Thanks for all your lovely words.
Monkey - glad you're getting on the national register nice and quick as it does make a difference. What age are you approved for? (Saying that, I am approved for 0-3 ) fingers crossed that things move quickly for you.

I have officially confirmed wanting to progress with the boys. Woo hoo. Now waiting for lots of appointments and dates.

 

[aimze]

Rainy that's amazing news...I hope you get info quickly for panels!

Ladies were in a situation here, don't want to say too much incase I give my identity away lol...

Yesterday we where visited by Los SW...he said Bm is pregnant!! Does anyone know how adoption leave whilst on adoption leave works?!? X

 

[Lolly1985]

Oh goodness Aimze, I really don't know. Well I think you need to get your work policy and see if anything comes to light. I know that if it happened at my workplace I could run adoption leave back to back but would only get statutory on placement of the second. If I wanted full entitlement I would have had to return to work for a 12 weeks in between placements. Eeek, sounds interesting your end!!

Rainy lovely little boys, I'm still totally thrilled for you!!

Monkey its good to hear from you. I think I would be very careful with a relinquished baby and you sound to be thinking along those lines. I am very cautious though after the journey whereas some could manage the risk. I know there is a girl on fertility friends site who has had a relinquished baby placed a few weeks back. You could maybe try searching previous posts or start a new thread on there for more info

So girls fantastic news!!! Birth mum's right to appeal was refused by the judge today and we at last have a date for the final hearing in 3 weeks time! Adoption order should be granted then and our little girl will be all ours forever. We are so over the moon

 

[aimze]

Oh my gosh Lolly that is the most amazing news ever! I'm honestly so happy for you! Yay!

Yep they need to make a policy! According to google i would get two lots of stat but that's my lot!! Ideally I'd want another year off with #2 so then first is over 2 and has his first 15hours free nursery...gosh I need my hubby to get a better job! I'm the breadwinner! X

 

[Lolly1985]

Thanks so much. It's my lovely other half's birthday today and it's such a special day for us. So happy!

Goodness that's really tricky. Stat pay is rubbish, but sometimes if you can you just manage. I think you need to find out all the facts if you can. Like would baby be able to be fostered to adopt by you or would they go to foster care elsewhere and you would have to wait for a placement order. It could buy you some time to spend with little man, only pay out for one and think about finances. Although the time with a little baby is so valuable to your family. It's a minefield isn't it xxx

 

[aimze]

Yea they'd be fostered but he's being relinquished so she isn't fighting a placement order!

Fostering works well with us because more time with #1! X

 

[Lolly1985]

Yeah I think that's sensible as you want to build the bonding and attachment with number one first. Busy times hun!! xx

 

[aimze]

Lolly it's justcrazy! Looks like our youngest will be the same age!!! I can't get my head around it...obviously it's no where near a given but just thinking about it is making my head and thought of bank balance hurt! Good job I'm using contraception or we'd be doing a hat trick ha x

 

[dreamofabean]

Oh my gosh Aimze! I would bear in mind that they will want to place baby with his sibling, so the ball is in your court! There are financial packages available if you ask! If you present them with the proof that you'd struggle financially there may be a way they could financially support you, it'd be much cheaper for them than baby staying in foster care!
Lolly it's just amazing news! Yay!!!!
Monkey I agree with the other ladies, I'd tread carefully with a relinquished baby.

 

[aimze]

Dream we've said yes!! We'll be assessed alongside other birth relatives...

I think if I can't get additional leave we're going to get hubby to take the full pay, then I can take over the stat part as the stat is per child x