Any body from Plymouth UK or near??...

[ScorpioLoz]

Hi nat,

Yeah it's the male doctor who is full time that is an asshole. The female one is more sympathetic but she wasn't available for a few weeks as she is part time. So better to see a doctor than none.

No dr didn't give me mw appointment because he wants me to have scan first. He doesn't seem at all interested or even positive about this pregnancy. His writing is scrawly and I can just make out "threatened miscarriage" but never said anything to me. He didn't even ask questions to come to that conclusion. It angers me!

I haven't had any abnormal discharge except for a snotty green one but only once. Took me back a bit lol! Some days I forget I'm pregnant because of lack of symptoms. Other days I will have the fatigue buti put it down to overtime or sometimes I will have a tummy ache like need to go for a poo. It's driving me crazy because I don't want to go through what I went through last time. Every pain, I panic. I am such a nervous wreck.

Hopefully the sonographer on Monday will tell me good news and give me a second opinion, if nothing then I will get another opinion from ocean. If the pregnancy is bad news then I will be hiding away in my room for the rest of the week :-/ I don't know how I would react to a second mc. Hopefully I won't find out.

I have no ladies I can speak to either to ask about things that happening in pregnancy and happens to me because I haven't told anyone yet :-/ last time I had the back up of colleagues and mum.

I'm just going to enjoy the weekend, my dad's birthday so doing a special meal. Baking a cake now for it actually. Then Mondays scan. Hopefully if all well, tell mum on Tuesday.

Xxxx

 

[ScorpioLoz]

Have my scan tomorrow... It's been a horrible few days... On Friday I had bright green snotty clumpy discharge, so I googled it. Not much help there. Then in the evening I had very light pink blood - immediately i freaked and cried my eyes out thinking I'm going through it again. But it only last under an hour. I have had nothing since. In fact I am extremely dry but my temps are leveling out around the 36.62 area.

Been bending over a lot onFriday so maybe that's why. Avoided a lot of bending yesterday but was entertaining family so had a few groin pains and complete constipation. It's horrible! I have the urge to go, but then nothing comes

Still haven't told family, it was incredibly hard lol. Waiting for scan tomorrow, then I'm taking mum to afternoon tea for Mother's Day on Tuesday, and if everything goes well, I have a fridge magnet for her (and one for MiL) saying "great mums get promoted to the best grandmothers" I bought it months ago in Endsleigh in sale 69p! Ready for when I would be preg again.

Anyway nat, how are you getting on? Must be about 6po? Any feelings? I always seem to know the month I get pregnant, just not 100% sure.

Xx

 

[natjenson]

Hiya Lorraine....I'm sorry your having a hard time of things with the pgy and worry

After what you have been through its understandable that you are scared.
And you know -it's ok to feel that way too.

I am glad you have your scan tmr too... hopefully this will bring you some answers and you will be able to finally relax.

Your temp drop sounds as tho you may need some progesterone Hun...do you think the ocean suite will give you some when you pop by?
I hope so.

Yes yes 5dpo here....
I do get feelings but I am a awfull symptom spotter....lol I over analyse everything tee hee...
BUT....saying this I am having some quite drastic bb change...and I have been "starving" the last three days I have eaten like there is no tmr and I cannot satisfy my hunger...on top of having and "off" taste to everything too...I keep thinking I can taste blood in my mouth too.really odd.
Hrmmmm anything else?...oh yes tmi....I have the most terrible wind...and it's so offensive eh..like I can clear a room lol...then again ipthe wind may be due to the fact that I am eating what ever I like and I usually so watchful over what I eat.

Anyways...I hope tmr goes well for you Lorraine -you will be in my thoughts love,

Natalie xxx

 

[ScorpioLoz]

My temp hasn't dropped considerably as you can see on my chart... I swore I'd stop temping too lol but can't do it! I told my dr to do a bloods test for progesterone... His answer - this isn't America you know :-o absolutely uncalled for!

So the EPU tomorrow may say something as I'll take my iPad with the chart tomorrow.

I have bad wind too. Very powerful ones haha but no smell! I tend to be really really hungry so I pile a plate up, then can only eat 1/3 of it due to being too full!

I will return with scan answers tomorrow

Xxx

 

[ScorpioLoz]

Had my scan and I was absolutely sh*ttingit because I was put in the same room as when I was told I had miscarried last year! same scan room too!

Anyway they can see a gestational sac, not sure if she saw a yolk but saying no for now due to being too early. She told me my dr was wrong and it was right. Got a picture that she gave me lol. Now I can show mum tomorrow. Said my wall (I assume that's my uterine wall) is thick and strong. Had bloods taken, messed up the first one so had to find another vein lol. Progesterone is 26 and hcg is 1893 which I think is good for 4/5 weeks. Got another blood test weds morn. They may scan me again end of week.

I love your countdown to testing lol... 8 days till testing! Think this may be your month? I really hope so, have my fingers crossed for you xx

 

[natjenson]

Oh Yaye Lorraine it's sounds very promising for you ...so pleased you had some of your nerves settled today.

Your numbers are looking great too.

Looking forward to hearing how it went with your mom too.

Yes...my ticker says testing in 8 days,lol.but naughty ole me will for sure test before then lol...
I am going to start at 10 dpo...which is Friday....
Thankyou for your encouragement with this cycle too...this is where I start to go a little do lally lol
Haha crazy tester coming right up...just what the doctor ordered of course haha

Have my doctors apt in the morning...I am hoping I can twist his arm for some clomid...
I'm totally expecting a no...but a girl has to try right lol.
Also going to bring up lp changes...spotting and slow to rise temps to confirm o...I am actually hoping he orders me a 21 day p blood test...

Oh and we get peters s/a results tmr too...so 4 or so weeks from here we should hear back from ocean suite for our apt.

Will let you know how this all goes tmr.

Take care Lorraine.
Make sure your resting them little feets up .
Natalie xxx

 

[ScorpioLoz]

How did your appointment go? Any clomid? Xx

 

[natjenson]

How did your appointment go? Any clomid? Xx

Hiya Lorraine...

My apt was really bad news today.

I told him all about my cycles changing and the spotting and he abruptly stopped me and warned me that he thinks this may be a sign of the cancer returning.
He is sending me for all the tests...
But the smear cannot be done yet as he wants it done mid cycle...so that's not going to. Happen untill the 17th of April.

I'm absolutely gutted.

This was my tenth year in the clear....so so upset...
I hope and pray with all of my heart this not happening again.
Gawsh my run of bad luck is never ending .

Need to try and stay positive and be string for little Harry tho.

Sorry I couldn't be my usually jokey self here...just a lot to take in today...
I'm say pure after a good nights sleep I will have a good plan and I will be able to be more "myself" again.

Back tmr love....looking forward to hearing how it all went with your mom.
I bet she's over the moon.

Natalie xxx xoxo

 

[ScorpioLoz]

Oh Nat, I'm thinking of you in this hard time. Hopefully it's just women's bodies playing up like they do and not your cancer. But I suppose he does have to warn you. How soon will you be having all your tests? Hopefully they don't leave it too long.

Oh I'm so sad for you. Keep me updated on this please

Urgh isn't that just typical that a smear is needed mid cycle. If you had known you would've got in few weeks ago.

Yes my mum is very happy, couldn't stop smiling lol. Gave her the gift of a magnet saying "great mums gets promoted to the best grandmas" and she got it straight away. Went to show dad and get him to read it. It took him a good few minutes the my mum said impatiently, do you get it!?!? And he went no, then said yeah. Mum clarified it anyway and went "lorraine is expecting!" And dad just went "oh" lol. He can't express excitement well but I know he is pleased for us, just worried that his little girl will go through the heartache again. I am proper daddy's girl.

Going to EPU today for second lot of bloods to compare to 2 days ago. Then hopefully tell mikes parents later.

Anyway, keep your spirits up Hun and I'm always here.

Xxx

 

[natjenson]

Heya Lorraine...

Thankyou for your kind words.
I had a couple of days thinking and I come to the conclusion that no matter how much I threat or cry or worry I cannot change the out come.
It is what it is.

I'm going with the flow for now.

Anyways nuff about me,,,,
How did them bloods go yesterday!
Any news yet?

Loved the story about your mom and dad and how you told them.thats was lovely.

Yeah I'm a daddy's princess too...it's lovely isn't it .tee hee.
But my dad lives 4hours away so I don't get to see him much at all.
But when I do I am spoilt lol
Wow actually it's been so long since we seen each other actually.
He works of Rolls Royce so he is a busy man.

Well I be checking in for your betas Hun...

Oh btw...I'm 9dpo today....bfn...oh well ...lol...maybe a little early still.

Natalie xxx

 

[ScorpioLoz]

Wayyyyy too early Hun!! My first was 17dpo, and this one was 11dpo.

My betas are confusing for the min, nurse said they going in the right direction but didn't double in the 48 hour time scale. However I had been reading stuff online saying that many ladies don't double till 60 odd hours later but less than 72 hours. Mine went up by 60% rather than 100%. I have a scanscheduled tomorrow morning to check.

It has made me nervous again but not too long to wait now.

We told his mum last night who is excited too. Then his nan as we saw her last night... She's not so excited (out of wedlock etc) but more concerned for me. Tonight mike tells his dad who will be happy. Then that's all the people we tell till 12 weeks.

Whatever the outcome tomorrow, we are off to tavistock for the day to take our minds off everything.

You are so strong dealing with your possible diagnosis. How soon will you know? Xxx

 

[natjenson]

Wayyyyy too early Hun!! My first was 17dpo, and this one was 11dpo.

My betas are confusing for the min, nurse said they going in the right direction but didn't double in the 48 hour time scale. However I had been reading stuff online saying that many ladies don't double till 60 odd hours later but less than 72 hours. Mine went up by 60% rather than 100%. I have a scanscheduled tomorrow morning to check.

It has made me nervous again but not too long to wait now.

We told his mum last night who is excited too. Then his nan as we saw her last night... She's not so excited (out of wedlock etc) but more concerned for me. Tonight mike tells his dad who will be happy. Then that's all the people we tell till 12 weeks.

Whatever the outcome tomorrow, we are off to tavistock for the day to take our minds off everything.

You are so strong dealing with your possible diagnosis. How soon will you know? Xxx

Heya Lorraine...sorry this is making you all nervous again...I think I'd defo feel the same here too.
Really hoping this all comes back good and well today.

Sounds like your nan is a old fashioned kinda gal...but all the same she only wants the best for you too...so so glad everyone is excited for you both tho.

Yaye..tavi today...hope you both have a great day...the weather here sux but I hear it's going to clear up.
Have a great day my love...

10 dpo...bfn...af due on the 3rd.next Thursday,..seems a years away right now lol
I suppose there's still time...
Gp says I am good to go for this cycle but not to try next cycle...

I have to wait five weeks from now to see the out come of the results...
Smear is I the 17th...again ...a million miles away...this is going to be sooo hard to wait this one out.
But I'm a tough cookie...I can do this....haha I have no chioce.lol

Annnnnnnyways...what will be will be eh.

Good luck Hun...thinking of you ...
Natalie xxx

 

[natjenson]

Oh Lorraine looks like I was wrong about the weather clearing up Hun...so sorry about that.lol

Hope you had a lovely today anyways love

Natalie xxx

 

[ScorpioLoz]

Yup weather certainly didn't clear up lol. But that's what coats and umbrellas are for :-D

My scan went well although I was bricking it. Found a yolk within the sac. I am 5.5 weeks. Rescheduled for another scan in 2 weeks time to monitor it so as you can imagine its a HUGE weight off my mind. Just need to take it easy and have a risk assessment put in place at work for me.

Yeah Mike's nan is very old fashioned but she understands the changes of today's world.

5weeks!? Hopefully you will stay strong through that Hun. And why did GP advise no ttc next cycle?

Keep strong xxxx

 

[natjenson]

Oh Lorraine this is really great news...I'm so happy for you...
So I can finally put you on my please stick bfp list in my siggi now???

I'm so so glad they are going to work out a care plan for you too...always great to have something to refere to when you are extra cautious or nervous.

Oh the gp wants me to "not try" next month bc of the tests...incase they have bad news.
Altho...I don't understand why I'm good to go for now but not next month.lol

This next five weeks couldn't go quick enough really.

Ok -I have this sneaky lil pan....tee hee.
He wants me to do the smear mid cycle...
But I shall rebook it for cd10 ...that way ...af is a goner and that buys me 4 days off the waiting time...
Then I will wait a week ten days and start bugging the surgery for the results.lol
The ttc aspect of this is out of my control but the waiting is going to be the killer for me.so cutting this down as much as I possibly can is a must.
Yup-you guessed it...I'm incredibly impatient

And also I have a good sense of intuition...9 times out of ten it's always right .
Going on my gut feeling here....I think I'm in the clear...

See Lorraine ...I'm sure this is to do with my lining...not the cancer returning.
Obviously I have to be cautious and trust my doctor on this one...bc after all they know best on these matters...and not trusting him could cost my family in the long run...so I'd be rather foolish not to have these tests done.
But ...going on my gut feeling...I'm right-they are wrong lol
I hope lol

I'll explain a little more about when I had the cancer before...
When I was 24 I mentioned to my doctor I was having a few issues with intercourse and stuff....and she ordered me immediate tests and warned me of the out come of them...
Of course I was petrified.
No less than a week later I was all booked in up the hospital for further testing and treatments....
The test results had come back with a mass of abnormal cells.so I was treated.and sent on my way with everyone's fingers crossed.
They managed to find out that I had strains 16-17 pre cancerous cells.
(Not the hpv virus) -( only had two partners ever and both times been totally safe)
Anyways...exactly a year later I was called in for another smear..to be on the safe side.
Within 3weeks of having the test I had been whipped into the hospital -this time for immediate surgery...
It had come back with a vengeance ,aggressivly and sprees into my lower womb.
They removed it and sent off biopsys .
It turned out I was very lucky that they co had caught it in time...it was cancerous.
I was reassured that this was something beyond my control.not somthing I may have caught from a partner,which was obvious bc I have never "been around the block lol"
And I made sure my previous partner and my current was "clear " of anything too.

So for ten years now I have had regular testing...the first 4yrs...every 6 month.
Then after that every year.
This was supposed to be the last year of yearly testing.and the big ole thumbs up that my odds had hugely dropped about getting it back.

I need this to come back good.i really do.

Anyways that was my story in short Hun...
I hope I have no more to add to it after these tests.

Anyways...onwards and upwards...I have a strong feeling I'm going to be fine.

Hope your having a great weekend love,
Mother's Day tmr...a special one for you eh.

I won't be doing much ...Peter has to work...maybe Monday we can do something special instead.
I at least want bacon and eggs in bed tee hee

Have a good one Hun.

Natalie xxx

 

[ScorpioLoz]

Wow what a journey! So scary too. Obviously you have to leave everything to the GP but believe in your instinct. It's your body, you know how you feel. And that plan sounds good because you can still ttc just not actually trying. More of not trying not preventing.

Yes go ahead lol put me in your sticky siggi.

No one will do anything for me this Mother's Day, it's too early on. But.... I get the advantage of having Mother's Day before Father's Day next year as baby will be born in November.

Have a lovely day tomorrow with Harry and I hope you get your eggs and bacon on Monday (I want eggs and bacon now lol).

Keep smiling xxxx

 

[ScorpioLoz]

Nat any news on testing? All seems quiet! :-/ hope everything is ok and you got spoilt by Harry xxx

 

[natjenson]

Hay there Lorraine...

Sorry I been Mia...had a tough ole weekend here...
But things are on the up again.

14 dpo...not even tested today...had a bfn yesterday.af due in two days...

Mother's Day was ok..Peter had to work but Monday he made up for it,
Didn't have to lift a finger (much) lol

So how are you feeling love?
Any symptoms yet?...
When's your next scan again?...

Going to add you in my siggi now...Yaye.

I have the smear on the 17th...but I may we'll end up rescheduling it for the 11th...wanna see if af comes on time first.
Then I have to take it from there.
Kind of nervous really....but in my gut feeling I think this is going to be ok.

Natalie xxx

 

[ScorpioLoz]

Ahhh there you are! Hope everything is ok, I'm sensing a bit of sadness? That's good things are on the up again.

My next scan is Friday 11th when I will be 7.5 weeks. Back to work yesterday and boy do i feel it! I've had to scale back on the amount of manual handling and minibus driving I do. Today was a worst day, just ouch! But when I got home, I still overdid it as I cut the front lawn which hadn't been done since last autumn! The I accidently touched cat poo when picking up grass and panicked ahhhh lol

To top it off, Mike has a cold brewing and refuses to come near me because of my pregnancy. Boooooo

As for symptoms, I've had sore boobs since day 1 and they getting worse, slight nausea, absolutely hate the stench of black coffee, very tired even after an hour or two of being awake. It's such a miserable feeling but im absolutely loving it!!! Because it all means that my baby is still alive.

I will never forget the immediate moment I knew the baby died last year, even2 days before I bled. I had nausea and heartburn, then one morning absolutely nothing and I had a feeling of dread. I knew.
I've had a few moments of no symptoms but no coinciding feeling of dread. Hopefully a good thing. 11th can't come quick enough! I'm not even contacting midwife till then!

Just remember it isn't over till the witch shows up ;-)

Xx

 

[natjenson]

Ahhh there you are! Hope everything is ok, I'm sensing a bit of sadness? That's good things are on the up again.

My next scan is Friday 11th when I will be 7.5 weeks. Back to work yesterday and boy do i feel it! I've had to scale back on the amount of manual handling and minibus driving I do. Today was a worst day, just ouch! But when I got home, I still overdid it as I cut the front lawn which hadn't been done since last autumn! The I accidently touched cat poo when picking up grass and panicked ahhhh lol

To top it off, Mike has a cold brewing and refuses to come near me because of my pregnancy. Boooooo

As for symptoms, I've had sore boobs since day 1 and they getting worse, slight nausea, absolutely hate the stench of black coffee, very tired even after an hour or two of being awake. It's such a miserable feeling but im absolutely loving it!!! Because it all means that my baby is still alive.

I will never forget the immediate moment I knew the baby died last year, even2 days before I bled. I had nausea and heartburn, then one morning absolutely nothing and I had a feeling of dread. I knew.
I've had a few moments of no symptoms but no coinciding feeling of dread. Hopefully a good thing. 11th can't come quick enough! I'm not even contacting midwife till then!

Just remember it isn't over till the witch shows up ;-)

Xx

Heya love....

Yah I was feeling a bit sore earlier with myself.lol....
I guess af is most defo on her way as this is how I get just befor she arrives...lol
Toys-pram.! That's all I'm gunna say haha

BUT.....I'm ok now...feeling a lot more like myself again tonight...my usual silly self lol

So mike has a cold! Oooooh no....I hope you don't get that again...oh boy.
So sweet of him to keep a distance tho.bless him.hope he makes a speedy recovery

So so glad that you are enjoying the joys of the first tri symptoms lol...it's nice to see your spirits are somewhat lifting now your mind has been put at ease love.

I may test tmr with my last cheapie...Akhummm thankyou pound land

They are 20's tho so I am always nervous to see the Evaps/shadows on them.
But then again that's only happened once what am I talking about haha.

Annnnnnyways...I won't bamboozle you with my wacky ways tonight lol...
I am thinking of watching that new Carrie in A min...I hope it's not as freaky as the first one lol...I'll be pooping my pants before sunrise else lol...tee hee

Yes yes...you keep taking it easy love ok...
And get as much rest as you can too...get them feets up

Looking forward to tmr...I am going to do a hard core work out and lots of walking and start the Scarsdale for two weeks and then go back to the restrictive calorie intake...I'm going to blast this ass away ...might as well whilst ntnp eh lol...

Take care my dear.
Natalie xxx