Anyone else starting IVF October/November 2015?

[Unlucky41]

Hi Kat,

Hmm twins is hard work. Would your inlaws help in that scenario? I was hoping for twins too so I never had to enter the fertility clinic again but so glad we didn't put two back. My daughter is a difficult baby still sleeping in my arms for naps

Hmm that is the thing not sure I can do another fresh cycle. If this FET Doesn't work not sure what we would do? I don't want any regrets but don't want to chase something that is not meant to be.

As for the wedding try to enjoy yourself and avoid talking about it. If you know she won't help. If she brings it up just say when you go through ivf that would avoid any ovulation issues. So politely Thank her for her suggestion and change the subject.

Have a blast at the wedding. Weddings are so much fun everyone in a super good mood and great food. Will you be drinking?

Only have one and a half week before work starts so scare to return. My brain is dead

 

[KatO79]

Hi Kat,

Hmm twins is hard work. Would your inlaws help in that scenario? I was hoping for twins too so I never had to enter the fertility clinic again but so glad we didn't put two back. My daughter is a difficult baby still sleeping in my arms for naps

Hmm that is the thing not sure I can do another fresh cycle. If this FET Doesn't work not sure what we would do? I don't want any regrets but don't want to chase something that is not meant to be.

As for the wedding try to enjoy yourself and avoid talking about it. If you know she won't help. If she brings it up just say when you go through ivf that would avoid any ovulation issues. So politely Thank her for her suggestion and change the subject.

Have a blast at the wedding. Weddings are so much fun everyone in a super good mood and great food. Will you be drinking?

Only have one and a half week before work starts so scare to return. My brain is dead

I don't know how much they'd be willing to help, especially at their age (mid-60s). My FIL also has cataracts so he can't see very well (tunnel vision) which might leave it all to MIL to take care of them (if we do end up with twins).

I can understand you not wanting to do another fresh cycle. I've been reading about how they do IVF at the hospital we're referred to and it does sound like it's very emotionally and physically taxing, a lot more than IUI I'm always making Plan B's so if I were you, I'd think about it now so you know exactly what you want to do if (heaven forbid) the FET fails. Maybe you could consider how far you'd go in that case e.g. 1 fresh cycle or 1 fresh cycle plus 1 FET?

I know she won't be helpful, she was so insistent about it last time and was really a witch about it. I don't know if the fact she's 5-6 years older makes her think she's somehow "the voice of wisdom" and makes her react that way? Anyway, I'll give it a try and see if she takes the hint. If she doesn't, I'll just walk away because I don't want to get into a heated argument. Wish I could go back in time and not tell just about everyone we started TTCing, it has been nothing but grief although it did make my NPD? sister shut up about when we were going to make babies (as if it's any of her business). As for drinking, I'll probably have 1 glass of wine for each course and leave it at that. Maybe 1 extra for the main course? Although I'm not even sure if it's a menu or a buffet. The worst thing is I forgot to remind him that I'm a pescetarian (since it's fairly recent, since fall 2012) so scared stiff I'll be served a steak or something

I'm sure your week back will go very smoothly and that there's absolutely nothing to worry about

 

[Unlucky41]

Kat how was the wedding?

Hmm yes I think if our FET doesn't work then we will try one more time. Our daughter is still very difficult hence don't want to neglect her too much.

I am very grateful to have my daughter but I am so ready to have adult time away from her. She is just too Clingy and needs me for every nap. Just lost it this morning and walked away when she refused to nap. Bad mother eh?

Kat do you prefer twins or a Singleton?

 

[KatO79]

Kat how was the wedding?

Hmm yes I think if our FET doesn't work then we will try one more time. Our daughter is still very difficult hence don't want to neglect her too much.

I am very grateful to have my daughter but I am so ready to have adult time away from her. She is just too Clingy and needs me for every nap. Just lost it this morning and walked away when she refused to nap. Bad mother eh?

Kat do you prefer twins or a Singleton?

Sorry took off for our 1 week trip to Italy Saturday night. In Venice but going to Florence tomorrow.

The wedding went fine. Avoided sitting with them and barely had any contact with them which was good. It was a civil wedding so it was a relaxed reception.

Yeah that's probably a good plan but here's hoping it won't be needed Maybe you and your DH could try getting away 1 night a month or something?

I think DH is mostly leaning towards hoping for a singleton while I have secret hope for twins but will be super happy either way at this point

 

[Unlucky41]

We are going to try and get mum to babysit every now and then so we can have so time together. Hoping our daughter starts to like my inlaws too so more babysitting option.

Enjoy your holiday and very glad you had a good time at the wedding.

Can't believe it is almost August this year is flying back really quickly.

 

[KatO79]

We are going to try and get mum to babysit every now and then so we can have so time together. Hoping our daughter starts to like my inlaws too so more babysitting option.

Enjoy your holiday and very glad you had a good time at the wedding.

Can't believe it is almost August this year is flying back really quickly.

Sorry for the long wait, the Wi-Fi was rubbish at most of the places we we stayed at and we were out so much that I was always exhausted when we'd come back to our room to sleep.

Anyway we started in Venice for a few days and then went to Florence and also drove around Toscana. It ended up being a pretty nice trip, despite the 30-35 degree Celsius weather Got back late last night since our plane was delayed 1-1½ hours

I think I may be 1-2 days late but we'll see. My hopes are of course pretty darn low after having TTCed for so long. Planning on testing Tuesday morning if AF doesn't show up by then since I've tried being 1-2 days late before and getting BFNs. I may even wait until Wednesday/Thursday morning because I'm crazy that way DH will be calling the hospital to see if we can start on the August round but of course not feeling hopeful. Otherwise we'll continue NTNP until October and see what happens

I think it sounds good if you can get your mother and in-laws to babysit once in a while. DH and I are planning on doing the same when we hopefully do get our baby. Hope everything goes well tomorrow when you start at your job again

 

[Unlucky41]

Oh kat are you still late? Hoping that you guys got your first bfp. Have you tested yet?

August is now which would be great I hate all the waiting that ivf brings especially after a fail cycle. You really just want to start again.

Starting work in two days time. Only two days this week. Hoping everyone handles it just fine especially me Hehe

Keep it updated kat!

 

[KatO79]

Oh kat are you still late? Hoping that you guys got your first bfp. Have you tested yet?

August is now which would be great I hate all the waiting that ivf brings especially after a fail cycle. You really just want to start again.

Starting work in two days time. Only two days this week. Hoping everyone handles it just fine especially me Hehe

Keep it updated kat!

Yep, used one of my specially imported FRERs to get a BFN Not even the slightest hint of a line. So I doubt at this point I'm pregnant, AF is just being evil again. She's still not in sight but I was 5 days late once last year. Now that I think about it, it was about the same time, end July-start August So sure she'll make her appearance soon.

Forgot to remind forgetful hubby to call the hospital this morning so just sent him an SMS. But I seriously doubt they'll have gotten a cancellation but you never know Yeah the waiting stinks. I just want to get started and see if I'm one of the lucky ones that gets a BFP on their first one. Anything's better than all this waiting

Here's hoping things go well for you this week

 

[Unlucky41]

Hi kat I hate it when AF does that gives you so much hope. Mine did that alot the first time it was late we tested but unfortunately ended with a miscarriage. After that is was a miserable 2.5 years before we had success.

Hope your hubby gets some good news. Waiting is torture but looking back at it I do treasure all the road trips and holidays we went on now!

Last day of mat leave. I hope dh doesn't get info one of his bad tempers because he now has to do a lot more. I hate his big bad temper! He is so quick to get angry. Now I just tell him I am going to run away with his daughter. His temper has improved over the years especially with the arrival of his daughter. He never give any temper to anyone but me lucky me.

 

[KatO79]

Yeah it really stinks but luckily my hopes were very low so not feeling that sad.

Unfortunately it was bad news as they had no cancellations so we're still first able to start IVF in October with our 1st meeting being September 28th It was a long shot....

 

[Unlucky41]

Oh no! Sept not too long now I guess. They might do a lot of test etc though before they start. Do you know anyone that has been through ivf there?

When we started ivf we had our appointment in March didn't cycle until June. Just getting you prepared for some more waiting time maybe.

What you doing this weekend? Just went to the dentist haven't been for ages. Can't believe how expensive they are such a rip off.

 

[KatO79]

Oh no! Sept not too long now I guess. They might do a lot of test etc though before they start. Do you know anyone that has been through ivf there?

When we started ivf we had our appointment in March didn't cycle until June. Just getting you prepared for some more waiting time maybe.

What you doing this weekend? Just went to the dentist haven't been for ages. Can't believe how expensive they are such a rip off.

No I guess not and now we have no choice but to wait Might also suit DH better anyway as he's busy with his new job. Maybe I can distract myself by starting to look around for a house since we want to move closer to his job so he can avoid the over 1 hour drive each way.

Actually the clinic took care of all testing (my CD3 hormones were normal for my age and the HSG showed both tubes are wide open) so nothing other than they want to do their own SA and DH goes in for that this week. We won't get the results until that meeting but I assume the results will be pretty much the same as the clinic's.

Unfortunately no, other than my narcissistic brother (he lives in the US) but he's never been supportive of me in anything so not an option He didn't even act supportive during my IUIs and has shown almost 0 interest in communication. I'd prefer to avoid him anyway since he takes every chance he has to be "verbally" and emotionally abusive. I think one of DH's friends has a sister that did to have her son but we don't know her. Going to a support group costs money here so we're not much for doing that since it's a bit pricey.

Ended up not doing much this past weekend. We did visit his older brother Friday night with the younger brother, his girlfriend and one of the cousins. It was a fun night. We played this music quizz and DH, his big brother and I won

Yep dentists are expensive, especially here when you add the 25% taxes. Absolutely insane. Hope you didn't need anything done that was that expensive or painful

 

[Unlucky41]

Oh what type of house are you looking for? How is the market over there? That is a big task and definitely will keep you occupied.

I survived the days of work so far which has been ok. My brains really slow to remember things and names of people very bad eh?

Sounds like you have a great time with your husband's family that is awesome. I love playing board games etc but never good with trivia. My brain only remembers things for a short time.

One of my uni friend announced she was pregnant with her second baby. She told me she has problems because it took one year to conceive. In my heart I was like that is nothing you still were able to conceive naturally! See what infertility has made me. A heartless Monster

 

[KatO79]

Oh what type of house are you looking for? How is the market over there? That is a big task and definitely will keep you occupied.

I survived the days of work so far which has been ok. My brains really slow to remember things and names of people very bad eh?

Sounds like you have a great time with your husband's family that is awesome. I love playing board games etc but never good with trivia. My brain only remembers things for a short time.

One of my uni friend announced she was pregnant with her second baby. She told me she has problems because it took one year to conceive. In my heart I was like that is nothing you still were able to conceive naturally! See what infertility has made me. A heartless Monster

Nothing very specific. Just a place with 3-4 bedrooms (so we can have 1 room as an "office" plus room for a child) that has a decent size lawn but a small garden. I think the market is good for buying but hard for those selling. Luckily we rent this apartment so it can just stand empty

Glad to hear things are going fine at work

Yeah it's really nice that I can have fun and relax with his family, not fearing the next put-down because there are none. It's a really stark contrast to my own family where the narcissists play mind games and are constantly putting me down, especially my brother, while the enablers just let things happen to be on good terms with the narcissists My former therapist that I wrote to recently (stopped going due to the cost) has advised me to concentrate on getting pregnant and just ignore them and avoid as much contact as possible until I can go "no contact" on them after I've had a baby.

Oh my, women like that should hear of people that have taken 2 years or more and have had to go through numerous IUIs and IVFs/FETs to get their baby 1 year is actually considered within the norm I don't think you're heartless, I'd have had the same reaction. I think things like that make us really suffering from infertility see red. But if she isn't someone you talk to a lot, I'd try and let it slide. It'd probably be very difficult to make her see that 1 year is nothing. Unfortunately I think true infertility is something you have to experience before you really understand it.

 

[Unlucky41]

Hmm you are right you really need to experience infertility to understand it. She used to be a close friend but she just seems too self centred and selfish it is very hard to be good friends with. She is so childish she is ignoring my messages so I also am learning to shut her away from my thoughts and mind. Just not worth it.

Your ideal house sounds very cosy and fun for your future kid. Hmm our place don't really have much of a garden which is a shame.

Hmm have you found any houses you like? Going to see them this weekend?

I totally agree that you should ignore your brother although it doesn't feel natural but for your own good.

 

[KatO79]

Hmm you are right you really need to experience infertility to understand it. She used to be a close friend but she just seems too self centred and selfish it is very hard to be good friends with. She is so childish she is ignoring my messages so I also am learning to shut her away from my thoughts and mind. Just not worth it.

Your ideal house sounds very cosy and fun for your future kid. Hmm our place don't really have much of a garden which is a shame.

Hmm have you found any houses you like? Going to see them this weekend?

I totally agree that you should ignore your brother although it doesn't feel natural but for your own good.

Yes that's probably best. Fertile people just don't get it. It's gotten to the point I refuse to discuss it with anyone that hasn't experienced it (except for DH's 92 year old grandma, she rocks and is super understanding despite not having experienced it herself ). My family you know and one of my friends just suggested I adopt when I mentioned we'd most likely need help last summer DH's parents have been pretty bad as well. So it's off topic with everyone at this point. Maybe you could do the same and tell her and everyone else that you just don't want to discuss it and you'll let them know when there's positive news to tell. I just don't think we need to hear people's BS when we're struggling with something like infertility

We haven't been combing the internet yet since DH has been so tired and busy with the new job, think it's partly the long commute that's getting to him This weekend will be mostly cleaning the apartment since I haven't gotten much done due to the apartment having been extremly warm this past week, like 30-32 degrees Celsius Airconditioning isn't a thing in this country and we only have the one large fan in the living room that can't cool off the entire apartment, might need to buy one more for the kitchen at least. So picking up the slack this weekend and otherwise trying to relax. It's also cooler this weekend so should be easier to get something done without starting to sweat like a pig a few minutes into any activity

Yeah should be easy to do since he's pretty much ignoring me. He did comment one of my FB posts (harmless comment to a pic of a spider I put up) and I kinda regret answering him but oh well. I've been replaced with my sister I guess but she's welcomed to him at this point. He'll turn on her one day, just like he did on me. Once she's not of further use to him or becomes a bad source of "narcissistic supply." Thank God I live thousands of miles away from these people, it's helping me heal from the emotional/mental trauma. Just need to stop my 1-2 times a week obssession with checking their FB pages I unfollowed them months ago but can't stop myself from checking weekly and I always regret it afterwards

 

[wannabeprego]

Hi girls,

Can I join in? I am going to be doing a FET cycle around the October/November time frame if everything goes as planned to TTC#3. I am a Mom to twins that were a result of my first IVF cycle. Just to give some background I had 20 eggs, I got 9 embryos and 6 of them were good enough quality to be used. I transferred 3 in my fresh cycle and got my twins and had the 3 frosties left over. My LTTC history is summarized in my signature.

I have a consultation with a new clinic on Monday 08/24 in the morning in the state I live in now to see if I like the DR enough to transfer my 3 frosties there or not for a FET cycle. Otherwise I would be driving 6 hours with my twins in tow to go to my original clinic in my home state and that seems really stressful so I am really hoping that I like this new clinic. Wish me luck!

Good luck to you ladies with your IVF cycles!

 

[KatO79]

Welcome wannabeprego

Wow I hope I'm as lucky as you were on your 1st IVF cycle You got to transfer 3? I think the limit in Denmark is max 2 so I'm hoping they'll let me transfer 2 to increase the odds (think chances are they very well might since I fit into the "36 or older" category).

I hope the appointment goes well! Doesn't sound very practical to have to drive that far if you end up preferring the original RE. Any particular reason you're waiting until October/November for the FET?

 

[wannabeprego]

Welcome wannabeprego

Wow I hope I'm as lucky as you were on your 1st IVF cycle You got to transfer 3? I think the limit in Denmark is max 2 so I'm hoping they'll let me transfer 2 to increase the odds (think chances are they very well might since I fit into the "36 or older" category).

I hope the appointment goes well! Doesn't sound very practical to have to drive that far if you end up preferring the original RE. Any particular reason you're waiting until October/November for the FET?

Thanks for the warm welcome hun! I am in the USA and I paid for the IVF cycle myself. My first DR recommended only putting back 2 but I asked to put back three! He agreed and did it for me! Cost was a huge factor for us and I wanted to give myself the best possible chance for a BFP on that first round! As you know and are about to find out it is a lot to go through and taxing on your body so I wanted to give it our all! DH & I were alright with twins if we ended up with them so we went for it!

That is too bad you guys don't have the option to put back more than two where you are but with 2 you have a really awesome chance regardless! I have my fingers crossed and I am sending sticky baby dust vibes that you get your BFP on your first cycle! Twins are wonderful but mine arrived early at 28 weeks and were really tiny! My son was 1lb 4.8 oz and my daughter was 2lbs 5 oz. They both had long NICU stays, my daughter was 2 months and my son was in for 4 months! I don't want to scare you though because I have 2 friends on the boards that had twins that were almost to full term and didn't have the NICU stay like I did, so you just never know what your pregnancy will be like! I also had a short cervix so I thought that was why the twins were going to arrive early but they came early due to my son's placenta failing and him falling behind on his growth, his heart was working really hard, and had fluid around it also! He is healthy now, thank goodness, both twins are developmentally delayed but they are catching up just fine now!

The reason why I am waiting until the Fall to do the FET is because I want the twins to be 3 yrs old before the next baby arrives since they can be a handful at times. I am also timing it so that I will be due in the summer so that my sister can come down in the summer to help out with the twins and the hopefully new baby since she has 2 kids of her own, her kids will be on summer break and that is the only time she can come down for any length of time to help out. I don't have a lot of friends in the state I live in now since we moved here from another state, so I don't have many people I trust to watch the twins for me! I am a SAHM so we don't use a sitter, at least we haven't yet! I have a hard time trusting strangers with my kids!

I am turning 36 soon so we have that in common! My DH is about ten years older than me! I am debating on whether to put back 1 or 2 embryos, just because of the risk for twins and what I went through with mine. However once again we are paying for all of this ourselves and I really need it to work the first time around, so I am leaning towards putting back 2 embryos. It is expensive for the FET but luckily not as costly as our first IVF cyle!

 

[Unlucky41]

Welcome wannabeprego! You have been through alot with your twins. I had one difficult baby can't imagine two. Are you a full time mum now or working as well?

My doctor would only Allowed us to put back one embryo at a time. How does your doctor chose which embryo to put back?

Are you happy with three kids? Or do you want more?