Anyone else with a gender preference?

[SpringCrane]

I'll preface this with saying that I feel very fortunate to be pregnant with my second child, and a happy healthy baby is what is important. I will love my child unconditionally regardless of gender (boy/girl/trans/etc!)

However... I really want another boy. I wanted a boy for my first too, but now that I have one, I really want another. There are a lot of different reasons, but regardless, I'm worried I'll feel disappointed if I find out it's a girl, and it would be horrible to feel disappointed about my baby for any reason!

I'm considering not finding out the gender as a way of avoiding disappointment. But, my mom heads an ultrasound department, meaning I can get scans whenever I want. If I decide to not find out the gender, I'll likely skip any extra scans by her to avoid her accidentally seeing the gender and knowing (I couldn't handle her knowing and me not!). It'll be really hard to not take advantage of free scans whenever I want, though!

I'm not sure what to do or think. I'm trying to tell myself it is a girl to get used to the possibility, but I just automatically envision a boy because it's what I know and what I want!

Does anyone else have a strong preference? How are you planning to handle it?

 

[butterflywolf]

Yes me! I wanted a boy so badly the first time. We got a girl. I still want my little boy specially since this is our last baby. For now though in my mind I'm preparing myself for another girl. As long as baby is healthy is all I really care about but...I always wanted a boy. I honestly hated the idea of having a girl the first go around. I hated it so much I fell into a slight depression. I would never trade my little girl for the world once I had her. I soon as I had her I loved her and then some. Still do. Don't feel like you'll be a 'bad person' at all if you have those feelings. Many of us go through it.

 

[heather2629]

I sooo badly want a girl. I already have a name for a girl, but can't think of one for a boy. I envision dressing her up, making her clothes, all of it. Of course, I'm just so excited to be pregnant I'll be over the moon with either gender, but I'd be lying if I said I wasn't leaning toward one.

 

[Hangin_On_AGS]

I had my girl and I really thought this one was a girl too and I was super excited about that cause I loved dress in my daughter up and we have a wonderful mommy daughter bond but they told me this one is probably a boy and I'm really struggling with that. But I know it will be great either way

 

[Squiggy]

I wanted girls. I got a boy first. I still want a girl. And am praying this one will be! I don't imagine that avoiding scans would make it any easier in the end. I'm a planner, so I have to find out immediately either way!

 

[atx614]

I am really hoping for a boy, the tech at 12 weeks said it looks more boy and I wished she hadn't said that. Now my heart is set on boy and I feel like I will be so disappointed if it is a girl. And that makes me feel terribly guilty. A lot of people in the gender prediction said mine looked girly so now I am worried! We will see next Friday!

 

[BabyLuv88]

I really would like a boy because I have 2 girls and I lost a baby boy at 16 weeks...

 

[pansorie]

I truly don't have a gender preference, I think only because I have worked myself up some much on being worried about having an unhealthy baby. At this point, I would be happy with anything... ANYTHING! as long as s/he is healthy.

If I was more confident about everything (and probably later in the pregnancy) I would have time to think about what gender I would like.

I think hubby is leaning on boy, just because he likes the idea of the oldest sibling being a boy.

 

[bungle]

I didn't think I had a gender preference when I was pregnant with DD2 but when we found out that she was a girl at the 20 week scan my OH and I just went "ohhh". I'm glad I had the time between the scan and her birth to get used to the idea, I'm not sure how I would've felt if I hadn't found out til she was born. Third time round i'd be lying if I said I wasn't hoping for a boy but if it's a girl I won't be disappointed, I'll just figure it wasn't meant to be. Babies are still squishy and wonderful nomatter what colour baby gro they're wearing ☺️

 

[kiwilove]

Of course for everyone, a healthy baby is what is most important...but I think most of us have a preference. I tried for 3 years before getting and staying pregnant. I'm hoping for a boy first time around but will be thrilled if its a girl too. I just like the idea of having a boy first...to be the protector of his little sister. And for selfish reasons...I want to bring the first boy into the family. DH is hoping for a boy as well. 6 more weeks until we find out.

 

[SpringCrane]

Thanks for all the replies ladies! I feel so much better knowing I'm not the only one with a preference. I hope we all have the happy healthy babies we are dreaming of!

 

[mrs_park]

I will be truly happy either way. I have two beautiful, healthy boys and to have a third would be lovely. Though I would be lying if I said I didn't hope just a little bit for a girl this time. This will be our last baby and I like the idea of balancing out our family a bit and the lifelong mother/daughter bond.

I do feel like it's a girl and we already have a girls name chosen, I'm trying to think of a boys name so that I can get excited about it if it is a boy.

 

[Nikoru0111]

My husband and I both think it's going to be a girl and I think because we both have a strong feeling it's a girl, I'm going to be slightly shocked if it turns out to be a boy.

My sister wanted to have a girl but she had a boy and wouldn't change him for the world and now she wants another boy for her second.

Might take me a while to get my head around if it is a boy but I'll be happy as long as he is healthy

 

[kissesandhugs]

With my first I badly wanted a girl. We got a boy and I had a few tears fall when we found out. Do I feel incredibly guilty for that? YES!!! but I couldn't help how I felt. Now that I have him I absolutely cannot imagine having a girl. In fact, I'd love to have another boy. He's such a mommas boy and I'd love to have a family of mommas boys selfish..maybe But a part of me is still wanting a little girl. OH most definitely wants a girl, hands down. He wanted a boy with our first. I feel like he'll be disappointed if it's another boy.

 

[amaryllis]

My partner wants a boy, I think. I am resigned to having more children so he gets what he wants, LOL! In our family, we have a habit of dreaming of our children before we have them. My dreams and feelings have all been saying that this pregnancy is a girl. My gut feelings are pretty good about this sort of thing. Hell - I knew after I'd had sex on the day I received the lovely genetic load from my fella that I was going to be pregnant. I just *knew*. I'd felt it'd happen all year and it did, when I felt it most keenly. And the feeling grew and grew until I finally reached the day where I could test early (5 days before period). And damn it - I knew it. Before the major symptoms kicked in, there it was, a damned positive.

And it's that same feeling that says I'm probably having a girl. Now, I am also a logical person and I know there's a huge possibility I'm having a boy. After having a miscarriage, I don't really mind if I do have a boy. Mainly because I can borrow a lot of baby stuff from my sister (who has a boy) and because the little one can play games with his cousin, like my brother and his nephew used to when they were kids. History repeating, so to speak.

But my gut says, it's not that history that is going to repeat. My cousin, a boy, and I used to play together when we were little. I feel like maybe it's *that* dynamic that will repeat.

I don't know. It's just me and my hippie woo-woo feelings, which are sometimes wrong. My rational brain says, "You have a 50/50 chance, there-abouts. You will get what you will get." And I know I will love it, because it'll be my baby.

But my spiritual side has its mind made up, really. *shrug*

Let's see which is right!

 

[butterflywolf]

Speaking of spiritual side, usually I'm a skeptic. My friend for four times now has told me exactly when I was pregnant the week before we could find out. (usually just a day or two after ovulating). She guessed girl towards about 15 weeks with my first and she was right. With my two chemicals she said yes you are pregnant but I cannot get a read on the gender, at all. With this one she told me a week before and said you're having a boy.

So it will be interesting to see if spiritual sides are right or stay right.

 

[smoore]

I think, emotionally, a girl would be easier on me. Since, I lost my son at around 30 weeks pregnant.

However, I'm just ecstatic to be pregnant after the loss and a bought of unexplained infertility. So, I will be over the moon either way!

 

[ajarvis]

I can't decide lol. Some days I don't care. Then I go through the baby section and all the cute girl stuff and I want a girl. Then I get to the boy stuff and I'm like hey a 3rd boy would be great

My SO wants a boy to "carry on the name" but will be happy with either. I knew with both the boys before the ultrasound to find out. So I'm curious to see if that will be the same this time.

 

[Mintastic]

I really want a boy and am not finding out gender partially for that reason. I know once I have a real baby in my arms I won't care anymore and will love a girl just as much. But I would rather not have months to dwell on it.

Two nights ago though I had a dream that it was a girl and she was great and I loved her so much so I am feeling a lot more okay with that idea now.

 

[pb921124]

I'm hoping for a boy, although I won't be terribly disappointed if I have a girl since I melt looking at little girl clothes. DH says he doesn't care although I think he wants a boy too since we both refer to baby as "he". Also I can totally see him enjoying a little mini him following him around.

After worrying about if i could even get pregnant and then the pregnancy worries about a sticky baby, I'll be over the moon just to have a squishy baby to love.