Anyone not breast feeding because they just don't want to?

[Suzie1985]

Please don't think I'm selfish for this post. I could make up a thousand reasons for not wanting to breast feed but quite honestly, I just don't want to do it.
My mum never breast feed me or my brother but I don't think it was pushed as much as it is today.

I'm getting odd looks already when I saw I'm going to ff,and I'm dreading getting further down the line of this pregnancy and feeling pushed into something I don't want to do.

I may breast feed the very first time although not sure yet.

Suzie
X

 

[socitycourty]

I'm not FF by choice but I have known ladies who do. it is completely up to you! don't let people get to you.

be prepared for the hospital to be pushy as they have quotas they need to maintain (hospitals in my area do, anyway)

your LO will be fine no matter how you choose

 

[skunkpixie]

I breastfeed DD1 for 22 months, and although it went very well and had no problems such as latching issues, low supply, mastitis etc it was VERY time consuming. That coupled with the fact that I had gestational diabetes when pregnant with DD2 (which can POSSSIBLY make your milk come in later and affect your supply) I decided it would be better all round to FF DD2 from birth. I didnt want to my eldest to be left to her own devices while I laid on the sofa breastfeeding for hours on end. I didnt want her to miss out on toddler and music groups.
I know people will say "well its not always the same each time, you still could have done it all and breastfed...blah blah blah.." but I just did what was best for OUR FAMILY'S situation. DD2 has not suffered negatively at all from not being breastfed. She has actually hit her milestones sooner than my breastfed daughter did. I will be FF DD3 for the same reasons and do not at all feel badly about it. Breast milk isnt magic. I wouldnt even call it "liquid gold". It is the natural most nutritionally perfect food for your baby BUT FF babies thrive and grow just as well as BF ones. xxx

 

[ravenmel]

I didn't really want to with my 1st but got lots of pressure from fam OH and health professional no one could understand why I just didn't want to, they came assuming I didn't know the benefits etc. My attitude was I'll try it and see if it's for me. I did it for 11 months with my first because it was easy for me and that's the only reason I did it, but if I did it and didn't like it I would have quit might be selfish but there's more to being a good mum than milk. I stopped bfing my 2nd about 3 weeks ago she's 2 months old and one of my friends came around and saw the bottles and made some comment about my 1st being smarter and healthier than this baby. It's my body, my choice I told her but it pissed me right off. I stopped this time because of issues but if I haven't who cares, why people think it's their busy how you feed your baby I'll never know. BFing is a good start but it's not the only way and doesn't make you less of a mother for not doing it. Good for you I say more power to ya
xoxo

 

[1stB4by]

I feel exactly the same way, I've been feeling guilty and stressing over it. My midwife said that midwife's will bang on about it, but not to feel pressured, if I feel strongly, it's my choice and body. I'm also dreading being out under pressure to do it. You're not alone x

 

[Charlie5]

Me!!! For me BF was not an option, not something that appeals to me, not something I want to do and not something that comes natural to me. Lots of ladies do and each to their own but it was not even a consideration for me, I don't want to and haven't (have 2 sons) - simple as.

You do have to take a firm stand sometimes and learn to ignore the tuts and disapproving looks but at the end of the day its your body, your baby and your decision. A happy mummy and FF baby is better than an unhappy mummy.

I won't get on my soap box about it but also be prepared for the pressured pursuaders..... the well just try, well just the first feed then.... etc etc ...- grrr, stand firm ie look I have said I don't want to so be-shushed!

Good luck with whatever you decide, and there is nothing wrong at all if you BF or FF

 

[Suzie1985]

Thank you ladies. It's good to know I'm not alone.

It's so sad to think we are pressured which is why I am more determined not to give in when I do feel so strongly about it x

 

[HellBunny]

I didn't want to with my first baby, i didn't know anybody who did and i couldn't imagine it to be honest! i did BF for a week with my second.

Its completely up to you how you feed your baby, nobody can force you to BF and when when i was bottle feeding my first baby i had alot help and support in hospital, i couldn't get him to feed and the midwives were all helpful. I had just as much help and support feeding my LO's whether it was breastfeeding or formula feeding. Ignore the judgemental ones, if they choose to make comments then they are obviously quite insecure! xx

 

[Mummythree]

its your baby your choice theres nothing to feel bad about.
nothing wrong with ff dont let anyone pressure you or make you feel bad. x

 

[Katy Bug]

I tried to in the hospital and freaked out when my boy started crying bc he was hungry. So I gave him a bottle, so sue me. Got ppd and couldn't handle bf so we stuck with ff. I felt horrible of course but my boy is still getting his nutrients. I'm sorry but I don't believe that bf babies end up healthier or smarter than ff. I have three cousins that were all bf and they seemed to stay sick growing up. More than me or my ff sisters. Don't feel bad. I feel like I'd be a worse no if I bf bc I'd be depressed from doing it since I still have the blues.

 

[Ktothema]

I chose to bf dd but as my mum and an aunt had real problems with it I had a formula back up. Glad I did as dd decided she didn't want to feed from any method and ended up ff in NICU for 3 days, I wasnt given access to pumps etc for 2 days so my supply never caught up. I tried expressing but dd was far happier on formula.

I weighed up the options with ds whilst pregnant and given my poor health and already having dd, I decided to ff from the start. I don't feel bad for this. Theres nothing wrong with dd at all, and I'm sure there'll be nothing wrong with ds. And at least I know they're getting decent nutrients at a time I'm not eating properly.

 

[aimee-lou]

I FF by choice with both my boys - granted with my 2nd I also have medical issues so had even more reason to choose it.

IMHO it gave me more time to recover, More time to bond, and more control over how my boys felt in their early days. I have 2 strapping, healthy boys to show for it, and do not regret it even for one second. Even when I was the in the birthing pool being pressured by the MW I stood firm and as soon as he was born, they could see how comfortable I was with my decision.

Main arguments I have come across

- it doesn't allow you to bond as well (nonsense!),
- it hinders their immunity (my first didn't have a single illness until he was 11 months and started at nursery! - second caught a cold from first at 3.5 months and was over it in 24 hours, took me 4 days! lol)
- it's cheaper to BF (this I can't argue with, but on the other hand, £2 a day to feed your baby isn't bad value is it!!)
- and it's more hassle (washing a few bottles, and making up some milk 2/3 times per day isn't a chore to me. You have to cook and wash up for the rest of the family, so where's the issue?)

 

[HellBunny]

I also have to agree with the myth bottle feeding/sterilizing takes more time etc! When i was bfing i would be feeding for around 7 hours at a time, when formula feeding LO finishes a bottle in 10 minutes = more time to play with my 2 year old!

 

[bubbles123]

I really wanted to BF my first and felt awful when it didn't work out, thought I'd give it a go with my second but stopped due to shredded nipples after a week (although expressed and mixed fed until she was 1 month) and to be honest if i have another I am pretty sure I would FF from birth. I feel with both of mine I wasted such valuable bonding time at the beginning being miserable about BF and I wouldn't want to go through it again. I would want to enjoy those first precious weeks. Nothing wrong with FF'ing, your baby will still thrive and most importantly it's your body and quite frankly no one else's business what you do with it!

 

[ChristinaG]

FF because I hated BFing...LO ate every 1.5 hours and I had pnd and couldn't eat enough...BFing was making me depressed. Much happier now

 

[embojet]

I FF both mine by choice, just because I didnt want to BF. Molly was prem so I expressed for a few weeks but didnt get on with it. Ethan has been exclusively FF. I have never had any pressure form midwives, hospital etc.

 

[Chezzz]

I'm not planning on BF OH wants me to but honesty I just don't want too..
I was never breast fed.. And no one in my family has breast fed they're children. I do have reasons but the main one to me is that I don't wanna.

 

[biliboi2]

I dont actually know anyone who doesnt FF!

 

[Anaconda]

I really wanted to breastfeed but once LO was born, my milk supply just never came in fully (would get only 4oz a day). So I started to supplememt with formula and then at 3 weeks I made the choice to just FF exclusively. Needless to say I am MUCH happier. The whole BFing ordeal just really got me down.

I wasn't even BF because I wasn't latching on. My sister was also FF. Even OH was FF.

So I think come second time around i'm FF from the start and there's nothing wrong with that!

 

[Incubus]

I FF by choice, there was no chance I was trying BF, totally not for me. I wasn't ever asked by my midwife what I planned on doing, in the hospital when in labour they asked and replied that's fine and at my first midwife home visit she asked and then said "oh that's good, saves me some time talking about breast feeding".