Anyone over 45 TTc ?buddies needed <3

[BBbliss]

Claire, thank you for the meditation link, I'll check it out. It's always nice to try different styles of meditations until we can come up with our own.

 

[angelwishes12]

Hi! I am 46 with a 7 year old. Not sure where to post due to wasn't actively TTC. I met someone and due to my age was not concerned about getting pregnant because I thought I was going through menopause so I just need to know if at my age, having unprotected sex with no clue when or if I ovulated as I was not keeping track of any of this, but now I'm concerned because of some symptoms I'm having. 15 days ago or so was the first encounter. Then had a stomach flu all last week that has not gone away. I just don't think my eggs could be any good at this point but maybe I am mistaken...I don't want to test because I'm a little afraid of the answer. Please help me figure this out.

 

[BBbliss]

Angel, we are all here on this board because we truly believe its possible, not easy, but still possible for some. I'm not clear if you want it to be or not, it sounds like a new relationship, but whatever happens I hope it's what you want.

Did you do have your first symptom a couple of weeks ago? You should just test and if its positive and it's what you want you should go see an OB and get everything checked so you can take all the steps you need to maintain a healthy pregnancy.

Let us know what happened please. Good luck either way.

 

[angelwishes12]

Yes I would be happy and I did just take a test, urine was very dilute, but it was negative....a little sad really. Thank you for answering. Idk these days what my body is doing so it's really hard to know exactly when I'm ovulating. Will keep you updated.

 

[BBbliss]

Angel, you can test again with first morning urine to be sure

If you are trying then you could try to know what's going on with your body, like finding out if you are ovulating and start charting your cycles. You can tell a lot by your ovulation chart. You can also do OPKs ... Those were the first things I tried before going to see my dr and getting my hormones checked.

If this is what you want, find out where your body is and take care of it, there's a lot you can do to give your body the best chances possible.

 

[ClaireCath]

Sue~~ so sorry to hear your news nut I agree with the other ladies. Your body is still doing what it is supposed to be doing! And your doc not being discouraged is another great sign. Take good care of yourself.

 

[dmama]

Hi ladies!
ClaireCath - welcome and good luck! are you and DH really considering IVF? I ask because if you really think you will go that way, you might want to consider not doing any more IUIs. I say this because I haven't seen a lot of success with IUI at our age....not to say you could not have success, but time is a factor and with the age of our eggs, moving to IVF straight away may be a good idea. The other thing is that you can save the money you'd spend on the IUI for the IVF....but in the end it is up to you and whichever way you go, I hope you find success!!!

SaintlySue - so sorry for your loss....

BBliss - is donor egg something that you may be interested in? I myself have been coming to terms with things. I have one bio child and I wanted another, but lately I have seen lots of families with kids that are clearly not of the same genes as the parents and the parents are loving on those kids as if they were. I know I could love a child no matter what now and the main thing is to complete the family and have a sibling for my child. So with the time I have been off brooding and pondering, I think I have made a decision to go with a donor egg. We can't afford a fresh cycle, so will use frozen eggs and we just have to set it all up. I think if I had unlimited funds, I could try several more IVFs and we might just get lucky with that golden egg, but there is not that much money and even doing this last donor egg cycle, is just that. It will be the last medical intervention. No more money can go to this. So.....just wish me luck ladies that I have the strength to move forward and that things go according to plan and that soon I will be able to get on here with a nice BFP to join yours!!!! I am incredibly busy with work at the moment...quite overwhelmed, so I know I won't post much for a bit, but I am thinking about my girls and I wish us all lots of baby dust and great things!
I have been very busy...no news on the

 

[Omi]

Hi Ladies..im back for a little support really. I had some extraordinary luck where I got pg (from not much trying!) and this has been followed by extraordinary bad luck, really. On my 9 week scan (nearly 10) the baby had died at 6 weeks and I was scheduled for another scan this friday. In the meantime we decided to go ahead with going away to the in laws (an hour away) and by this time i started to mc but as it was painless (a huge difference from before, this was my 3rd missed mc) I was happy to go. However, I started to lose a lot of blood, fainting and finally ended up getting rushed to hospital in the middle of the night, getting blood transfusions and then getting diagnosed with an infection. It was touch and go for a few days and I am now back home. Exhausted but almost ok. Still on iron tablets and antibiotics. Scans showed everything has gone so I am lucky really, overall. But, Im not gonna lie, a 3rd mc was bad enough but ending up in hospital so very ill has been shocking to say the least!

However, I am back here because I still want to ttc. Am I mad? Im not am I? I am well aware if the fact that I am very likely to mc again - as this is the stats at my age (im 44) - but I am accepting of that and hoping that if I keep at it i may, just may be lucky..

There are no one anywhere else that would understand this so I hope you can give me the support to keep going

All the best

xx

 

[BBbliss]

Omi! I'm so sorry you ended up in the hospital after all you had to endure. It's hard enough emotionally, I can't even imagine being fiscally ill to the point of needing a blood transfusion. You poor thing

I hope you are back on your feet again... And I know emotionally it could take a lot longer to come to terms with it all

Don't give up omi, you were so close

 

[Omi]

Thank you so much! Yes, it's a bit shit all of it, but you know, you gotta be in it to win it and we already said that even if it never happened, at least if we tried we would always know we gave it our best shot, iukwim?

Im afraid to let anyone else know that we'll try again as Im sure the average (dare I say young and fertile) person would think it's just madness, lol!

Thanks so much, I will be fine with time and frankly, there is nothing to stop me but fear and Ive been there and done that so onwards and upwards eh?

xxxxx

 

[BBbliss]

Dmama, that sounds like a good plan and I know how hard it is to make those decisions. I'm always thinking about my options, every day, and I think I'd go with donor as my last resort, as you. I still have a couple of options, we are going to try another IVF, but I'm going to see if maybe I can do a couple of mini ivf's instead of a long protocol like before. It just took so long and there were so many expensive meds, I also had a horrible migraine the whole time. It was hard, I know some people don't have as many side effects. I don't know, it was hard and then we didn't have a good ending to the many months it took. My second option is donor egg, but that will be after I try on my own again. My in-laws are helping with costs this time so that's good. I'm going away for a few days but as soon as I get back I'm going in to see the RE again.

D, I hope we are both successful on our next try, it just means so much to me and DF as he has no kids. We all here deserve it.

Omi, I like hearing you being hopeful for the future and not giving up

 

[SaintlySue]

Omi so sorry you had to go through all of that. I would not worry about what others think about ttc after having miscarriages. My aunt suffered many before having her normal healthy children. They say 8 out of 10 pregnancies end in miscarriage but it happens before we even notice it. I had a patient that was 49 when she conceived after over 25 miscarriages. She never made it to 12wks. She carried the normal healthy baby to term even with horrible health problems. Her and her DH never used birth control she had a child when she was in her early twentys but then the rest were miscarriages. They did genetic testing and found her DH carried some kind of genetic defect that they felt was causing the problem. But that baby was a normal healthy little boy. Also, when I was in labor with my son a 49 year old woman was also giving birth to her child, natural conception. The only reason I knew about her was we had the same OB and they had to delay my C-section because they were trying to get her to have emergency C-section, the baby weighed over 10#.

Angelfish, I know someone who at 47 thought she was going through menopause had an affair with her boss and got pg. I also know someone who was 48 and she kept having her hysterectomy date changed for various reasons, insurance authorization, time off from work issues, etc.. When she went in for her pre-op blood work they told her she was pregnant.

Also, I do not know if any of you ladies ever heard of taking Benadryl for it's antihistamine properties. I think you are suppose to take it starting after ovulation.

 

[dmama]

Hi Ladies..im back for a little support really. I had some extraordinary luck where I got pg (from not much trying!) and this has been followed by extraordinary bad luck, really. On my 9 week scan (nearly 10) the baby had died at 6 weeks and I was scheduled for another scan this friday. In the meantime we decided to go ahead with going away to the in laws (an hour away) and by this time i started to mc but as it was painless (a huge difference from before, this was my 3rd missed mc) I was happy to go. However, I started to lose a lot of blood, fainting and finally ended up getting rushed to hospital in the middle of the night, getting blood transfusions and then getting diagnosed with an infection. It was touch and go for a few days and I am now back home. Exhausted but almost ok. Still on iron tablets and antibiotics. Scans showed everything has gone so I am lucky really, overall. But, Im not gonna lie, a 3rd mc was bad enough but ending up in hospital so very ill has been shocking to say the least!

However, I am back here because I still want to ttc. Am I mad? Im not am I? I am well aware if the fact that I am very likely to mc again - as this is the stats at my age (im 44) - but I am accepting of that and hoping that if I keep at it i may, just may be lucky..

There are no one anywhere else that would understand this so I hope you can give me the support to keep going

All the best

xx

Omi...sounds like a very terrifying event. So glad you are on the mends. So sorry for your loss.
Yes, don't give up...I got pregnant at 44 and while it was via IVF and not via BD, it was my own egg...so some golden ones are in there, and it is a matter of time and sometimes money before we find one....hugs

 

[Omi]

Thanks guys

If I was honest I would probably try IVF again, if I had the money but alas, we don't so its au naturale all the way here Im afraid, lol!

I did absolutely nothing special last time, which of course is ironic as I did buy a few items (health supplements). This whole episode has hardened my resolve and I have decided to up the effort so im gonna do a few things that is said to improve egg quality. I had another read yesterday and came across another few things I havent tried yet; inositol for instance. Anyone try it?

I can't take melatonin because of my thyroid and having tried it once, I really don't like DHEA so Id better stay with the other ones I think .

Here's the link to the page i read https://www.pullingdownthemoon.com/blog/2011/june/supplements-to-improve-egg-quality-.aspx

Fx and all the best to each and every one of you - you are truly inspirational women and deserve every good thing coming your way

xxx

ps, wanted to add I did take heaps of stuff before I got pg with my son so maybe it does help? Worst case scenario I'll be healthier and I can do with a bit of that, lol!

 

[SaintlySue]

I used inositol for months and stopped recently. I have some but I just really did not notice any benefits. Maybe it was not good quality. I am doing a low carb diet right now, so I am thinking about doing it again. I think I had been off of it for a few weeks before we conceived. What about soy isoflavones? I have heard some women say it helped them ovulate.

 

[Delphine11]

Omi, that sounds terrifying. I hope you're recovering now. What a horrible thing to happen on top of the awful loss.

Dmama, I completely understand your thinking. I often think that if I had all the money in the world to spend on TTC, I'd be pregnant by now. I still feel I have some good eggs, but the potential costs of trying to coax them to work via IVF or some other assisted conception is frightening. We simply don't have the money. We haven't ruled out donor eggs either - for that reason. I find it unbearable when my partner is upset about not having any children. It's horrible to see. So, if donor eggs will give us a better chance of having a child, then I'm definitely not ruling them out. My partner puts on a brave face most of the time, but I know how much he wants this.

BBbliss, it'd be great if you could do some mini IVFs. Having a migraine all the time sounds awful. I know there are a lot of options out there to try, and different protocols. Some months ago, I did a lot of reading about IVF and some of the not so full on procedures sounded good sense. I also read that for older ladies, sometimes a gentle approach works just as well as a more aggressive one.

I'm feeling a bit down today. My partner's way of coping with the stress and worry of IVF seems to be going out to endless sporting things with his friends. Maybe I'm just a bit weepy with the hormones, but I could have done with a bit of support at the moment. It also concerns me that he's hiding his stress not talking about it. Men!

 

[Omi]

Ive just bought a load of supplements. Staying away from L'arginine as someone on here said that recent studies showed it was bad for ttc but otherwise it's a familiar list. Prenatal, vit d, vit c, b complex, co enzyme q10, inositol, royal jelly, selenium and dha.

I took this working up to my son's IVF so fx it'll work again. Im off the l'arginine and have added the inositol to that protocol

I have no idea if any of it will work but as my main issue is egg quality it sure can't hurt, lol!

There are a few things I won't try as i don't want to mess with my cycle and also some things I can't take due to my underactive thyroid. I think soy is one of those things. Controversial for some but a good thing for others

I also want to add that Ive stopped using the CBFM as in the last couple of years I find it hard to get a peak/ positive ovulation on it. Same for Ebay cheapies OPK and I now just rely on my ewcm. In all of my natural pg's I have never done a sexathon ( ) and I have always gotten pg from bd before OV and not on the day or similar. It really does take luck, perseverance and that one good egg. Fx for us all

Happy Friday everyone xxx

 

[BBbliss]

Omi, I'm taking so many things my DF is calling me crazy pill lady, lol it's just a desperate attempt of skipping another IVF. I read that post about the the L arginine but still chose to go back to it after my last one day AF. I'm also still taking a prenatal, coq10, baby aspirin, dhea, vit d, folic acid, wheat germ oil, omega 3, I do ovulate every month but I'm on my second cycle of soy Isoflavones since someone here had such good success with it. On top of it all I just went to a new ACU and he gave me Some TCM to take for weak blood, FU Fang Dang Gui Wan. I'm really curious to see what my AF will be like this time, I should be ovulating the next couple of days but I can't really temp or do opks as we are away at our in-laws for the wknd so we have to get busy here in their guest bedroom, LOL

Delphine, it is the hormones, you know, being a woman is not a walk in the park, we have so much more to deal with, the gifts of heighten emotions come with a high price at times at the same time man don't know how to deal with their emotions. We are the ones left with the job of being the mature and understanding ones. Doesn't sound fair does it?

 

[ClaireCath]

Hi ladies!
ClaireCath - welcome and good luck! are you and DH really considering IVF? I ask because if you really think you will go that way, you might want to consider not doing any more IUIs. I say this because I haven't seen a lot of success with IUI at our age....not to say you could not have success, but time is a factor and with the age of our eggs, moving to IVF straight away may be a good idea. The other thing is that you can save the money you'd spend on the IUI for the IVF....but in the end it is up to you and whichever way you go, I hope you find success!!!

SaintlySue - so sorry for your loss....

BBliss - is donor egg something that you may be interested in? I myself have been coming to terms with things. I have one bio child and I wanted another, but lately I have seen lots of families with kids that are clearly not of the same genes as the parents and the parents are loving on those kids as if they were. I know I could love a child no matter what now and the main thing is to complete the family and have a sibling for my child. So with the time I have been off brooding and pondering, I think I have made a decision to go with a donor egg. We can't afford a fresh cycle, so will use frozen eggs and we just have to set it all up. I think if I had unlimited funds, I could try several more IVFs and we might just get lucky with that golden egg, but there is not that much money and even doing this last donor egg cycle, is just that. It will be the last medical intervention. No more money can go to this. So.....just wish me luck ladies that I have the strength to move forward and that things go according to plan and that soon I will be able to get on here with a nice BFP to join yours!!!! I am incredibly busy with work at the moment...quite overwhelmed, so I know I won't post much for a bit, but I am thinking about my girls and I wish us all lots of baby dust and great things!
I have been very busy...no news on the

Hi Dmama, and ty for the warm welcome. As far as IUI v. IVF for me...My insurance through work covers $12k towards meds. After 2 failed IUI's we have around $3k left and OHIP (provincial health insurance covers all other aspects of IUI, all bloodwork, scans etc) So we can do one more IUI and pay nothing. On the other hand IVF we will pay completely out of pocket. I know success rates for iui are not that great at our age but if it is covered we will probably do that one more and go from there @ our RE recommends. I am having a lap done next week and hoping that will get to the root of my problem and pray to conceive naturally after that!

 

[ClaireCath]

Omi~ that sound terrifying, glad you are ok now. A word of advice about age...it's just a number and who cares what other people think?? I surely do not! I am 44 too, but feel about 30 so if my body is willing it really doesn't matter to me other peoples opinions on my age. Those who truly love you will be supportive! Go for it. I am on a boatload of supplements to. I pretty much rattle when I walk. lol
Delphine~~ sorry you are feeling down but chin up dear! Things will get better. Men focusing on sports for distracting....sounds like my life! But I like sports so I don't mind. Not like he's out boozing all night. lol Just hang in there hun, take it one step at a time and our time will come!