Anyone TTC #1 and 30 or older?

[Xokittycatxo]

psycho I did not know that about RRL tea! What an amazing plant. I just know that it helps regulate my cycle and alleviate cramps

Angel Couldn't agree more! Thank goodness for you all. Especially since OH and I decided not to tell anyone about ttc, I literally have no one else to talk to. Although, after reading the stories about how ignorant people can be about infertility, I'm really glad about our decision.
I'm also on CD1 so we are cycle buddies hehe.
Kat hope you are hanging tough! Great about the house, how exciting!! And gives you something positive to think about.

AFM....CD1. My O is very late and my LP is only 7 days so I've got to correct that. At least I'm O Ing and my chart was very helpful. I'm glad I stuck with it and am still, it's shed light on the issue.

Iread I had the same issue with vitex so I took them for a while in the evening as well until I got used to them now they don't bother me. All the side effects to the herbs make my wonder if you have overactive hormones...have you ever had your thyroid checked?

 

[Angel5000]

Kat Good news about the house! Sounds lovely! I know that people talk about how stressful home buying and shopping can be but DH and I really had a good time looking for houses to buy. The only thing that really got me was the one I really wanted we got outbid on. But that's okay because the house we got didn't seem as "nice/fancy/new" BUT it definitely fit our personalities better. It was like the minute I walked into this house I was like "this is my house". Hard to describe it. Hopefully this house is similar for you.

xokitty Yeah, I wish we hadn't told people we were trying. It would be easier. But I've been keeping quiet and have told several people who have kept asking that we are ona break at the moment because I don't want a due date at the beginning of the school year. Of course that isn't 100% true, we aren't REALLY taking a break (though my original plan was that we would), but it shut them up.

 

[ireadyermind]

Iread I had the same issue with vitex so I took them for a while in the evening as well until I got used to them now they don't bother me. All the side effects to the herbs make my wonder if you have overactive hormones...have you ever had your thyroid checked?

Yes, twice. Thyroid levels appear to be normal. I don't feel like they're normal, though. I sleep 10+ hours a night and still need a nap in the middle of the day, my energy is so low.

Vitamins, protein shakes, caffeine, various fats/carbs/fibers don't help no matter what levels I eat them at. I drink 2+ liters of water a day, so it isn't that either.

Added to all my other physical issues, I know there's a hormone problem somewhere. But as of yet, I haven't been able to pinpoint it. I'm hoping that having my hormones tested by the fertility folks will reveal something.

 

[KatO79]

So called and my HCG has of course fallen to 10 so they want me to come in for 1 last blood test on Friday They want to see it go to around 3 I think. I told her I have been bleeding red heavily since yesterday but it didn't matter, they still want me in on Friday. Today was already bad for me as I sat in the waiting room with 3 very pregnant women and then it got worse when a woman came in with her tiny new baby I barely held it together until after they took blood and then cried in the car afterwards.

I asked her if she knew about what the plan was for next IVF and she only could see they'll be putting me on the short protocol.

 

[Angel5000]

Kat

 

[psychochick]

Sorry KatO It sucks that you have to go in once more and have to confront possibly even more pregnant women. I can't imagine going in time after time and having to face this each time. Fingers REALLY crossed for next ivf cycle. In the meantime, happy holidays!

ireadyermind: there's another girl in another thread having similar issues with cystic acnes and suspecting that it's an issue with testosterone. hopefully you get some answers about that. Hormones are really tricky stuff in my experience. And a lot of things we have of addressing hormone issues is kind of trial and error too. Why do our bodies have to be so complicated.

I'm at the second week of my TWW, but this cycle I'm less anxious. I think I can actually hold out on testing until AF!

 

[ireadyermind]

ireadyermind: there's another girl in another thread having similar issues with cystic acnes and suspecting that it's an issue with testosterone. hopefully you get some answers about that. Hormones are really tricky stuff in my experience. And a lot of things we have of addressing hormone issues is kind of trial and error too. Why do our bodies have to be so complicated.

My testosterone has been tested and is normal. But if my estrogen is too low, that's basically the same as having a high level of testosterone since it becomes the predominate hormone in my system, sooooo that might be a possibility. We haven't tested estrogen, progesterone, LH and the rest yet. Just waiting to hear back from the clinic on what our next steps ought to be. It's the end of the year, though, and aside from doctors taking vacations for the various religious holidays, there is also the matter of a lot of people trying to use up benefits before the year is out. I imagine the offices are swamped.

 

[psychochick]

Ireadyermind: yeah I agree that it's not just about the levels but also about balance between the different hormones that could be off too.

I also forgot to vent earlier today: I saw not one, but TWO pregnancy announcements on facebook today. Why is it always monday morning? Haha but I don't know either of these girls very well and they'd all been married for years already so I didn't feel so bad, since I don't know how long they'd been trying.

Also last week, I was at an event with a friend of mine who just had a baby (and of course they got it on the first try). His wife is overseas with the baby now. And he's usually very tactless and so as usual, he was having a conversation with an unmarried couple and kept talking to them about marriage and engagement. And I kind of said "stop pressuring people" and his response was "well, how about you, when are you going to have a baby?". He knew I've been trying a while too! Then to make matters worse, afterwards he apologized for being his usual not-thinking-before-speaking self and then said "it's normal to take a while, my wife's mother tried for a whole year before her first and ended up having lots of kids" and I was like ".. I know it's normal." Felt like he was apologizing to make himself feel better about saying the wrong thing in the first place, cuz I was more than happy to not discuss it any further. Ugh, people. I wasn't too bothered but I'll definitely never forget this conversation.

 

[KatO79]

Sorry KatO It sucks that you have to go in once more and have to confront possibly even more pregnant women. I can't imagine going in time after time and having to face this each time. Fingers REALLY crossed for next ivf cycle. In the meantime, happy holidays!

Thanks psychochick Yeah, I was hoping it was only that one time, just to make sure my numbers were going down, but I guess not. I'll try and sit in the semi anti-social corner of the waiting room next time. That way I'll only see any pregnant women on my way in to the "blood room" and that's better than having to see them for minutes on end while waiting for my number to be called in. Thanks, you too

ireadyermind: I hope you soon find out what's going on with your hormones. If the clinic doesn't mention it, say you want to get your CD3 and evt. "CD21" hormones measured, if nothing else to rule any hormone issues out. But if they're worth their salt, they should suggest it themselves.

BTW my childish friend never answered my SMS Saturday about my chemical Wrote to her again yesterday asking her if she saw my text about my chemical but no response. I know she's studying for exams with her boyfriend but you'd think she could find 2-3 minutes to write back and say she's sorry to hear that ect ect So I still fear her asking about it when we see them for movie night and just claim she "didn't see my messages" which is obvious BS She's only twice herself asked for updates during this whole IVF process but never responded to any of my updates but you'd think she could answer this. We've been there so many times for her when she was upset about men and afraid of not finding anyone and now that she has a boyfriend she can't even be bothered to answer a text when I'm upset. I just won't bother anymore with the IVF updates. Once we move, I can distance myself from her and hopefully make new friends where we move. I think she's so into her boyfriend, she doesn't "have time" to answer messages from friends.

 

[ireadyermind]

psycho - Ugh, the announcements always get me! Especially when it's people who only just POAS and couldn't wait until their first exam to blab about it. Don't they know how frequently miscarriages happen? Probably not.

As for that man friend of yours... It's not often I hear about guys asking people when they're having kids, it's always women. Strange that he thought about asking you too! Maybe just because you defended the others that he was pressuring about marriage, though. It almost sounds like he thought he had to come up with SOMETHING to say to you because he couldn't use the "when are YOU getting married?" bit.

I hope he learns to think before speaking, or else keep his mouth shut entirely! lol. I'm sorry he was so thoughtless.



Kat - I hope I find out, too. There is SOMETHING going on here, and if these guys won't help me find out what, I'll keep hopping from doctor to doctor until someone is willing to work with me!

But really I'm not in any rush to keep paying more and more money into these procedures. Besides, in January, DH's Health Savings acct gets a credit added to it that we can put toward more testing. So I am perfectly okay if we TTC on our own this month and start up with more testing and whatnot in January! lol

 

[psychochick]

Hi girls, I think I just experienced a chemical this past week. I wouldn't have even known if I didn't track my cycle so closely but my temp usually drops 2 days before AF and instead mine kept rising. Saw a line one day on IC, got excited and tested on a FRER next morning and it was already super faint. So I already suspected it wasn't going to work out and AF started a day later blegh. I personally have mixed feelings about this because this is the first time I even saw any evidence of egg and sperm ever meeting so I'm glad to know that it is possible. At the same time, if it already took 8 cycles for this to happen, I wonder if it will be another 8 cycles or more for it to happen again and whether it'll be a chemical again. At the same time, I know everyone has their own struggles here so I want to be grateful for what I already have.

DH has also been a saint during this process and I'm very grateful for that. I guess 2016 BFP here we go. Happy holidays everyone!

 

[KatO79]

Hi girls, I think I just experienced a chemical this past week. I wouldn't have even known if I didn't track my cycle so closely but my temp usually drops 2 days before AF and instead mine kept rising. Saw a line one day on IC, got excited and tested on a FRER next morning and it was already super faint. So I already suspected it wasn't going to work out and AF started a day later blegh. I personally have mixed feelings about this because this is the first time I even saw any evidence of egg and sperm ever meeting so I'm glad to know that it is possible. At the same time, if it already took 8 cycles for this to happen, I wonder if it will be another 8 cycles or more for it to happen again and whether it'll be a chemical again. At the same time, I know everyone has their own struggles here so I want to be grateful for what I already have.

DH has also been a saint during this process and I'm very grateful for that. I guess 2016 BFP here we go. Happy holidays everyone!

So sorry psychochick I hope it doesn't take you long to conceive again. I'm pretty sure I had a chemical on my 7th cycle when DH and I were TTCing naturally since I had the same symptoms as my IVF chemical. Don't want to scare you though because I'm praying you're much, much luckier than me and you'll get your BFP very, very soon. I wouldn't wish what I'm going through on anybody I've also heard of women that experienced a chemical and got their BFPs shortly after so here's hoping that's what will happen for you

AFM nothing much to report TTC wise since I'm just waiting to start IVF #2 after New Years We ended up dropping the house we looked at a 2nd time because we didn't dare with that roof issue but managed to find another house we like and are now seriously considering bidding on it. It also has a nice view from the balcony and It's also nicer than the other house anyway We were interested in looking at 1 more house but it sold before we managed to call and get a chance to see it, oh well, guess we noticed it too late and the owners were already in the process of selling it

Managed to buy DH his present Friday (a pair of new everyday shoes) and DH is out today buying his present for me. We've bought all the Christmas gifts for his family so that's it. My narcissistic mother wanted us to buy some Danish goodies and send it to my narcissistic brother in the USA who's been silent treatmenting me almost consistently for 2 years (other than wishing me a happy birthday each year and that altercation over FB back in January this year). I told DH we shouldn't because I think at this point, he'd send the package back anyway (and the expensive shipping price would be out the window) so we've dropped it. Anyway we'll be spending Christmas on the 24th at his parents' house (the 24th is the big day in this country) this year and end up going to my narcissistic mother on the 26th for a Christmas lunch.

 

[psychochick]

Thanks KatO. I understand, we all have our own struggles. Even when I hear about people getting BFP right after chemicals I also don't feel so hopeful because I'm not them and it varies so much from person to person. At the same time, it does make me feel better knowing that this is common and it doesn't necessarily mean something is "wrong". I think being on these forums help a lot with that.

Also hope you find a great house soon. House hunting for me may be one of the more stressful things in life, even more so than TTC so far because it's entirely up to you, so it's a lot of decision fatigue.

You should just abbreviate "narcissistic mother" to NM and "narcissitic brother to NB just like how we say DH or MIL

 

[ireadyermind]

Good morning, ladies!

I'm feeling cheerful today. Got to celebrate my birthday over the weekend and got a really awesome gift set from my mom and sisters, which I am enjoying right now.

Psycho - Oh man, I'm sorry to hear about that chemical! But at least you know you CAN get pregnant, right? That's how I try to look at it. I know it's hard to keep a positive outlook at times, though. Especially when you've been TTC a long time.

Kat - I don't blame you for not taking the house with roof problems. This is my and DH's second home we've purchased (our first home was in the ghetto and it was a pile of junk! lol, but that was all we could afford at the time) and we were so relieved when we learned that this current home has a new roof. Rooftops are so pricey and there can be so much damage caused by a single leak -- if the seller won't repair that for you, then I'd have stayed away from it too!

 

[Angel5000]

Morning ladies. My mom is coming to town today and staying with us for a week. I'm about to head out to try to get some final Xmas shopping done while DH is at work (love teacher holidays!). I've also got to go to the phone store. Found a cell phone in the parking lot yesterday and can't get into it to find out who it belongs to (or to call any contacts to try to return it). I tried to reply to some of the texts because on my phone I can reply to a text w/out having to put in my passcode but this phone is locked down. So I finally called AT&T and they said they can locate the owner without having to access the phone so I'm bringing it in today. Hopefully they can get hold of the owner and get it back soon. Before Christmas is what I'm hoping! If I had known they could do that I would have just taken it to them yesterday when I found it! lol!

Hi girls, I think I just experienced a chemical this past week. I wouldn't have even known if I didn't track my cycle so closely but my temp usually drops 2 days before AF and instead mine kept rising. Saw a line one day on IC, got excited and tested on a FRER next morning and it was already super faint. So I already suspected it wasn't going to work out and AF started a day later blegh. I personally have mixed feelings about this because this is the first time I even saw any evidence of egg and sperm ever meeting so I'm glad to know that it is possible. At the same time, if it already took 8 cycles for this to happen, I wonder if it will be another 8 cycles or more for it to happen again and whether it'll be a chemical again. At the same time, I know everyone has their own struggles here so I want to be grateful for what I already have.

DH has also been a saint during this process and I'm very grateful for that. I guess 2016 BFP here we go. Happy holidays everyone!

So sorry The only way that I knew about my 2 CPs was because I track my cycles very closely too and my LPs are always exactly 9-10 days, never more so when I hit 11DPO something was up. It's perfectly understandable to have mixed emotions. On the positive side at least you know something is happening but it's so hard to see that line and then lose it.

I had my first CP at I think my 7th cycle, and then my 9th cycle I had my second one. I didn't get a chance to try really my 8th cycle because that's the month my dad went a little crazy and pulled a gun on us and I had to have him arrested. :/ During my fertile week, and it sort of ruined the mood. I don't want to scare you that I had a second CP so soon (I think I have low progesterone but dr won't test yet, going to push for testing in January), but more so encouraging that there's a chance you may conceive within the next couple cycles. Several girls in my other group got their BFP the first or second cycle after a CP. It could go either way.


Kat Hopefully the new house works out!! That would be so nice! Good luck with the xmas visits to your moms. Hope that it is uneventful.

 

[KatO79]

Thanks KatO. I understand, we all have our own struggles. Even when I hear about people getting BFP right after chemicals I also don't feel so hopeful because I'm not them and it varies so much from person to person. At the same time, it does make me feel better knowing that this is common and it doesn't necessarily mean something is "wrong". I think being on these forums help a lot with that.

Also hope you find a great house soon. House hunting for me may be one of the more stressful things in life, even more so than TTC so far because it's entirely up to you, so it's a lot of decision fatigue.

You should just abbreviate "narcissistic mother" to NM and "narcissitic brother to NB just like how we say DH or MIL

Yeah I think having CPs is first maybe an issue when you've had more than 3 if I'm remembering correctly But even then some ladies get BFPs after having had a number of CPs and MCs. I think one member I spoke to a bit some months ago has had numerous MCs and CPs but she's now pregnant and expecting her 1st so there's always hope

Funnily enough I don't find house hunting very stressful It's almost fun to shop over the internet and see which houses look good and the go out and look. I on the other hand hate moving though, packing and transporting stuff to the new house/apartment is always a bother. This move more so since it takes about 45 minutes to 1 hour to drive to the town we want to move to DH wrote to the seller today to ask for a new report after we checked out the old one from back in 2003. The vast majority of the flaws from that old report the owner has fixed so providing there's nothing serious, we'll be making a bid, just have to wait until after New Years to see the recent report since he can't get anyone out until after.

Yeah I was considering those abbreviations but was afraid most wouldn't understand them since this is technically a TTC forum But maybe I could start using abbreviations (NMom = Narcissistic Mother, NBro = Narcissistic Brother, NSis = Narcissistic Sister, Ecousin = Enabler Cousin, EWife = Enabler Wife, GC = Golden Child and SG = Scapegoat) on this thread since pretty much everyone on here knows about my toxic family?

Good morning, ladies!

I'm feeling cheerful today. Got to celebrate my birthday over the weekend and got a really awesome gift set from my mom and sisters, which I am enjoying right now.

Psycho - Oh man, I'm sorry to hear about that chemical! But at least you know you CAN get pregnant, right? That's how I try to look at it. I know it's hard to keep a positive outlook at times, though. Especially when you've been TTC a long time.

Kat - I don't blame you for not taking the house with roof problems. This is my and DH's second home we've purchased (our first home was in the ghetto and it was a pile of junk! lol, but that was all we could afford at the time) and we were so relieved when we learned that this current home has a new roof. Rooftops are so pricey and there can be so much damage caused by a single leak -- if the seller won't repair that for you, then I'd have stayed away from it too!

Happy belated birthday What gift set did you get?

Yeah I seriously doubt the seller would fix it although we probably could've gotten the house a bit cheaper. But yeah, it'd have delayed when we could've moved in also and been a pain.

Morning ladies. My mom is coming to town today and staying with us for a week. I'm about to head out to try to get some final Xmas shopping done while DH is at work (love teacher holidays!). I've also got to go to the phone store. Found a cell phone in the parking lot yesterday and can't get into it to find out who it belongs to (or to call any contacts to try to return it). I tried to reply to some of the texts because on my phone I can reply to a text w/out having to put in my passcode but this phone is locked down. So I finally called AT&T and they said they can locate the owner without having to access the phone so I'm bringing it in today. Hopefully they can get hold of the owner and get it back soon. Before Christmas is what I'm hoping! If I had known they could do that I would have just taken it to them yesterday when I found it! lol!

Hi girls, I think I just experienced a chemical this past week. I wouldn't have even known if I didn't track my cycle so closely but my temp usually drops 2 days before AF and instead mine kept rising. Saw a line one day on IC, got excited and tested on a FRER next morning and it was already super faint. So I already suspected it wasn't going to work out and AF started a day later blegh. I personally have mixed feelings about this because this is the first time I even saw any evidence of egg and sperm ever meeting so I'm glad to know that it is possible. At the same time, if it already took 8 cycles for this to happen, I wonder if it will be another 8 cycles or more for it to happen again and whether it'll be a chemical again. At the same time, I know everyone has their own struggles here so I want to be grateful for what I already have.

DH has also been a saint during this process and I'm very grateful for that. I guess 2016 BFP here we go. Happy holidays everyone!

So sorry The only way that I knew about my 2 CPs was because I track my cycles very closely too and my LPs are always exactly 9-10 days, never more so when I hit 11DPO something was up. It's perfectly understandable to have mixed emotions. On the positive side at least you know something is happening but it's so hard to see that line and then lose it.

I had my first CP at I think my 7th cycle, and then my 9th cycle I had my second one. I didn't get a chance to try really my 8th cycle because that's the month my dad went a little crazy and pulled a gun on us and I had to have him arrested. :/ During my fertile week, and it sort of ruined the mood. I don't want to scare you that I had a second CP so soon (I think I have low progesterone but dr won't test yet, going to push for testing in January), but more so encouraging that there's a chance you may conceive within the next couple cycles. Several girls in my other group got their BFP the first or second cycle after a CP. It could go either way.


Kat Hopefully the new house works out!! That would be so nice! Good luck with the xmas visits to your moms. Hope that it is uneventful.

Hope they find the owner of that phone! I actually lost mine once (it's a white Samsung Galaxy Note 3), this past summer actually, super embarrassing as it's a 2 year old Christmas gift from DH It was at a heavy metal festival but luckily someone must've found it and handed it over to the lost & found people which is where we found it.

Yep here's hoping We just need to hope no other buyers are interested. They did mention they had 1 couple out the week before but hadn't heard back so hoping they ended up buying another house and we won't have any competing bids.

Thanks Angel but it turns out she suddenly called DH today and cancelled the whole thing She said she couldn't manage it DH offered we could go out and buy all the food but she was adamant and started talking about how she was so upset my GC NBro (Golden Child Narcissistic Brother) is still no contact with her ect. ect. I'm sure she'll be using it against me in the future, how she spent Christmas all alone

 

[deafgal01]

Phones are a funny thing. I'm glad you was honest and turned it in. The owner of the phone will be so relieved to know it got found!

I had an opposite situation couple years ago - the phone was stolen from my spouse, he was at work and forgot about the phone which was laying down on a surface (of a desk or table) and a student stole it. Ironically the kid tried to activate it as his/her phone at the store (AT&T) and since it was registered under our name, the store kindly told the kid he/she better leave since the phone was registered to someone else and immediately called us to return it to us. The only thing missing was the case we had on it so we had to buy a new case for it but other than that, we were relieved not having to spend money to get a replacement.

 

[Angel5000]

Yeah I took the phone in and they were able to check who the owner was, called another line on the account and told them they had the phone. The guy on the line was so relieved (I guess it was his daughters phone) and was very thankful. Made me so glad to hear his relief and happiness.

 

[ireadyermind]

Kat - Thanks! My mother and sisters each chipped in and bought me a small espresso maker, with accessories like little cups with saucers, biscotti, a variety of coffee grounds, and the little pitcher that you use to froth up your milk in. I was super excited!

This year's was the first birthday anyone's done anything for me in a long, long time. Since my bday is close to Christmas, usually nothing happens. I might get a hug or something, but this year I was able to spend the weekend with my family, got a girls' night out, and they surprised me with gifts I hadn't even expected! It was a good time.

 

[KatO79]

Glad that you managed to get the phone back to the owner Angel

AFM the plot thickens with my NMom NMom called my DH and told him everything: it seems as if my NAunt (my NMom's sister who lives in Spain; they normally end up having arguments when together long enough) is staying with her because she got into an argument with my ECousin's DH and left their house, without taking any of her clothes or anything with her. They weren't telling anyone because NAunt didn't want her daughter, my ECousin, knowing where she was. So my NMom even lied when the police called her and asked her if she knew where NAunt is and said no. But now they've admitted it so everyone knows now. DH and I are now afraid my NMom will invite us for Christmas lunch anyway, now with the added bonus of my NAunt being there

ireadyermind: Wow sounds great, what a lovely gift Yeah I can imagine being born close to Christmas would end in you not really getting to celebrate really. Glad you had such a lovely weekend with your family!