April Mummies 2011

[gertrude]

and crying again - I need to stop looking on here you're all being too kind to me

She's totally thriving and looks fantastic (and is ahead of her milestones) and I don't have an issue with formula at all - I just feel like I've failed at being a woman

 

[cheese lover]

don't forget, you have been breastfeeding, therefore you have not failed at being a woman!

 

[MissFox]

Ladies- you're doing what you can and so far it's been fantastic for your LO. Now what you can do is more for them. YOU need to be happy. I cannot tell you how many times that I've tried to feed Rosie while completely stressing and she is less than interested in eating and she starts to cry. You need to take care of yourself to make sure your LO is also taken care of.
I've even been thinking of starting (at least supplimenting... but I know that's the beginning of the end) ff just for the ease of not trying to pump extra milk and not waking up through the night to pump milk for later that day. I don't get anywhere near as much as I should (as much as she does) when I pump. It's so frustrating and I know if I was in the position that either of you were then I probably would have switched to formula by now. You've done amazing!!!
But that failure feeling is a bitch lol.

 

[Mrs-C]

Ladies, I had to stop BF in the second week, LO just couldn't do it and even my medela pump couldn't get much out.

I still beat myself up about it but LO is much happier, and I enjoy feeding times now. She stopped losing weight and started gaining. Now she has gone from 2nd percentile to 50%-75%. She's really caught up.

I honestly started enjoying LO more once she was actually feeding, even if that wasn't from me.

You've given your LOs the best start. Once I told the MW I was going to switch to FF as that was basically what she was getting anyway and the attempts at BF had us both in tears, she said that was best but that they aren't allowed to tell you that. She told me a happy mummy is the best thing for baby.

I honestly felt I was slipping into depression with it and her words did help. A little. At the end of the day, you have to do what's best for you and LO. I won't lie and tell you that it is easy to switch to FF. For me it was about accepting it hadn't worked out as I wanted. I had to do that with the birth too. We live and learn. You can plan all you want, but it doesn't always work out. It really is out of our hands.

I blame the NHS as they push BF so much but fail to prepare you for the struggles you may face and how to deal with them. Then when you are in it for the first time and it's happening to you, you don't feel alone in the world as a failure. Since talking to others I have found the problems are not uncommon, it's just no one talks about them. I guess the NHS don't want to scare people and those who it doesn't work for don't want to talk about it, because of the pressure.

 

[DanaBump]

i'm wondering if it's just a UK thing because tho my dr's have said bf is best, there's no judgment if you decide to ff.
i still struggle when she's sick that i didn't do enough, but i did what i could. remember that first trimester we were preggy praying we did everything right to get a forever baby and just leaving it up to whatever we believe in? realizing we had no control and just had to accept that? this is along the same lines. it just doesn't work for some babies/mommies and that's OK.

 

[MissFox]

I think it might be more of a UK thing. I remember when the first lactation consultant came into my hospital room (she was a down-right BITCH) she kept telling me that I was doing it wrong and that my baby was giong to loose too much weight and that my baby was going to need formula because I didn't "give birth" to her and that made it harder to BF and that there was all these problems with me letting her sleep in the hospital (she down right got pissed if I woke her up to try to feed her and she WOULD NOT eat). I honestly felt pressured into ff. I told that bitch to f-off because I labored and I did give birth to my baby and that I was going to try my hardest. Needless to say they sent a different lactation consultant in the day I left the hospital.

 

[SazzleR]

I know you all speak sense but it's so hard to think about giving up. It's the guilt. And the thought of having to tell the HV etc. that I'm not BFing anymore. I'll have to see what Tuesday's appointment brings and make a firm decision then. xxx

 

[MissFox]

Good luck Sazzle! And if you do decide to quit don't be afraid to tell the HV. Just stand firm and don't let them push you around and make you feel bad.

 

[JakesMummy]

Sazzle the first time round I gave up BF quite soon after I had Jake and felt incredibly guilty and like you, dreaded telling the health visitor. But 2 years on Jake is thriving and doing well. No-one can tell whether he was BF or not.
But what I'm trying to say is in hindsight, you shouldn't care less what the poxy health visitor thinks! It's your baby, your body etc. I went through this last week and completely understand the guilt you feel if you did, more towards our little ones. But you really gave done bloody well getting this far, especially with a tongue tie!!! I admire your battle in keeping on with it.
This time round I am way more relaxed with baby. In fact I don't wish to see the health visitors this time as they pissed me off so much, with Jake and weaning ( a whole different story!!!

In fact, I am still breadtfeeding Amelia but gave her formula tonight as we were out and she was cranky. Im sat here pumping now but my supply is dropping. Mainly because she's going through the night and I stopped pumping at night, originally. I'm guessing in a few weeks she will be FF. I don't think she's satisfied on my breast milk alone.

Sorry I'm rambling on now!

 

[gertrude]

Thanks ladies, yesterday was a bad day.

This morning I was feeding pickle laid down and she kept breaking her latch to grin at me that's not going to help me stop is it!

Think I'm going to go to breastfeed first and last thing with any expressing I can do for the next couple of weeks.

Dazzle, pickle had a tongue tie that was cut and it did make a difference but ut took a while for her to learn how to use her tongue. Ultimately it didn't make that much difference as it is her sucking that's a problem, she doesn't suck hard enough hope yours is more successful though x the procedure is nothing x pickle hardly noticed it.

 

[CrazyBird]

When i told my health visitor that i had stopped breastfeeding she told me that it was probably best but she would never have advised me to stop becasue they are not allowed, but she agreed that George was struggling on the breast as he had such bad colic and cried all the time. Once i stopped he was a different baby. But that was George and might not be the same for other babies.
I definatly know about the guilt as i kept feeling guilty and thinking i had failed but there are so many babies who have Formula and they are just perfect.
At the end of the day it's your baby and your decision and who cares what a stupid health visitor thinks.

 

[lilgemsy]

I've missed the forums!
Can't wait to get home and catch up!

Ollie got let out of hospital yesterday but I'm still in missing my little man like mad!
My mum an dad are looking after him thankfully. But it still should be me! I neeeed to get better!

They don't even have a clue what's wrong with me still! Grr annoying!

 

[SazzleR]

Good to hear from you Gem. Glad Ollie is home now. I'm sure you won't be far behind him

 

[Mrs-C]

Glad Ollie is ok. Hope they figure out what is wrong with you soon and you can get home to him.

 

[Emmy'sMommy]

Glad Ollie is home and i hope you get released soon

 

[chocojen]

i am ffing and proud, i am happy so george is happy xxxxxxxxxxxxxxx

although he had his first jabs today so is a bit sad this afternoon and i cant put him downx

 

[cheese lover]

I hope they figure out what's wrong Gem! At least Ollie is out. Have they figured out what's going on with him?

Yesterday we had a notification form Fedex that we had a package that required a signature so I spent the morning working from home. The package ended up being from my work! I still don't understand why they couldn't have sent it to my work address! Oh well, I got to spend the morning with Isis.

I think she might be teething. She's drooling everywhere, if I put my finger in her mouth all she does is bite. She's been fussy, and fussy at the breast, latching and unlatching. I don't feel anything yet but it could be early.

 

[MissFox]

Rosie has been the same way for weeks. Drool and chew. My friend is a dental assistant and was saying.g you could see her tooth buds on top.

 

[Lilly12]

Aleena is teething too. Her bottom canines are pushing her gums up!

 

[cheese lover]

glad I'm not alone. her fussiness has been driving me a little crazy. I'm used to being able to fix every problem with a cuddle or a boobie. Diversion is the only way I've been able to help with her fussiness.