***April Sweet Peas*** 204 Babies

[Minstermind]

Thank you poppy666 and MrsRaggle.

I have like two minutes on here as baby T's just starting to wake (Murphy's Law, haha) so I'll be able to reply better to everyone's updates in the morning most likely.

Just wanted to comment quickly 555Ann555...I can relate to your feelings about giving formula and feeling a failure for not providing enough, etc.. I think it's something you've just got to be able to process over some time and come to terms with, as I've got to do as well. You know what people would say, that it's most important your baby is here and alive and happy and thriving, and just hang onto that. Really, down the road and over time, the hurt of this will fade and you may even have a chuckle one day at how much you fretted over it. Things for us are a lot more magnified right now. Time will soothe it out and you've got to weigh the pros and the cons. Now, as things stand, you are finally able to enjoy baby more and breathe a little after the insane schedule you've been following so many weeks. Be good to yourself, and this too shall pass

 

[mrsraggle]

I too understand the feelings of failure. We moved Eloïse over to formula around about day 5 when she stopped weeing for over 24 hours. The midwives were saying I'd have to take her back into hospital if she didn't wee so I gave up breastfeeding (it was hard enough as she wouldn't latch onto my massive nipples and we both ended up crying at every feed) and just gave her formula because I was so worried. I was beside myself actually, I didn't stop crying for a day. Then I expressed a couple of feeds for her a day and supplemented with formula until about day 12/13 and since then we've exclusively FF.

I find myself justifying us FF to anyone to asks how we feed and being a little envious sometimes of those who have breastfed. I already felt like poop because my body didn't labour properly and I got to 3cm in 38 hours induced labour and had an emergency c-section so failing to breastfeed made me feel even worse. Infact it took me ages to feel like I'd bonded with Eloïse, as I felt I didn't love her enough. Only in the last week have I felt much better about the whole situation but I think I'll always justify my feeding "decision" to anyone who asks...

 

[xpinkpandax]

I can totally relate to you mrs raggle, I felt like a failure also & to be honest I still do even after trying to convince myself that everything that happened was meant to be

I tried bf for only a day can't believe how soon I gave in but it was awful, she didn't seem to be getting anything and she was sucking so hard she ended up with red blotches on her face. I know what you mean about the big nipples I thought I was going to suffocate her lol I had to push one side of my breast away from her nose so she could breathe! I was in so much pain with the c-section and every time she fed it felt like stabbing glass into my nipples, after constantly feeding every half an hour and she was still cryin I gave in to formula I couldn't cope anymore!

This time I was determined to have a vaginal birth but again I had another emergency section, at the time I was glad just to get her out at she was distressed & there was meconium in my waters, so I convinced myself it was for the best...but the feelings are flooding back again just like my first birth & i'm feeling like a failure why can't I birth like any other mum?

1st birth - Failure to progress, 6cm, foetal distess
2nd birth - Dilating well got to 8cm, meconium in waters, foetal distress & head high up.

I suppose we must keep reminding ourselves how lucky we are to have children as there are women out there who can't conceive.

 

[mrsraggle]

xpinkpandax this is why I think I'd go for an elective section for next babies - I can't face going through all this again!

 

[Freyasmum]

I'm so sorry you girls are feeling that way.

To me, the important things are that you and your baby are healthy and cared for. It doesn't matter how they came out, or what you are feeding them (within reason - obviously I don't advocate giving them chocolate cake or dirt or something!). What matters is that you have a beautiful baby and that you are giving them the love and nourishment they need to thrive.

The very fact that you have recognised there is a problem and made that decision to switch to formula says to me that you are doing a fabulous job, and are far from being a failure.

It really winds me up that mothers are made to feel guilty for doing the best for them and/or their baby.

Keep it up ladies. You're doing a bloody marvelous job.

 

[Minstermind]

I totally relate to those feelings. I'm really struggling along myself to try to get back to exclusive breastfeeding and don't know at this point how it will work out in the end. It broke my heart to give the bottle of formula the first time and I felt like a failure too. I know we ''should'nt'' and all that, but feelings are feelings and I can't help that's how I felt. I got depressed looking at the breastfeeding section on here, lol..

It's tough alright. I think women in general have a tendency to blame themselves very easily in different situations and this is a whopper of a situation to play up the guilt and everything. It's a learning curve and feels like I am learning to walk all over again, heh..

In the end, I know I'll come to acceptance. I know the feeling you have about kinda feeling the need to explain yourself regarding formula, but really, you don't need to. It kinda circles back to a 'caring what other people think' mentality which can be really harmful to one's psyche. But I know how hard it is to let go of that because it's so ingrained in us as a society.

I just try to make sure that despite my inner processing of all these emotions, that I take the time to say some positive things about myself too, to try to balance out the negativity right now. There's so many wonderful things to praise ourselves for in becoming moms and loving and nurturing our babies. Even going with formula is a positive choice in the sense that you made the conscious decision to do something that would ensure your baby's well-being, ya know? So sometimes just looking at things differently can help. And remember, before modern science there were a lot of women dying in childbirth (like 1 in 10) so it's not like you're alone in the need for medical intervention. It's been a problem since day one of our time on this planet and thank god we have the medical means now to keep people alive.

 

[xpinkpandax]

xpinkpandax this is why I think I'd go for an elective section for next babies - I can't face going through all this again!

After having my first section it annoyed me so much I was determined to give it a go again because in my head all i could think about was that I'd never get the chance to try again & I'd never know if I could birth vaginally. I was confident this time I could do it but sadly nature had its own way, I knew deep down I'd get another section & I'm glad still as my little girl was in distress & when they offered forceps I declined straight away as I didn't want anymore stress on her than she was already in.

The disappointment has come back but I am soo glad I went through labour again as it wasn't as distressing like the first time round, this time you know whats happening, love telling my labour story too. I think if you can't go through it again yourself go for elective, there are plus sides to c-sections although we can't get up straight away after giving birth at least our bits are still intact! lol

 

[kimmyjane84]

xpinkpandax this is why I think I'd go for an elective section for next babies - I can't face going through all this again!

That's exactly what we did... With Harry we were induced at 14 days over (about 8/9am ish) and he finally arrived by emergency c-sec at 16 days over (11:29am), so we had just over 2 days of failed induction... This time we decided to book the c-sec for 2 days over, which was totally the right decision for us because I was later told that there was no way I would have laboured naturally due to her size (9lbs 6.5oz).

 

[Minstermind]

Poppy666, how's the feedings going? Since I've had to supplement with formula I've noticed baby T having more spit up happening and whatnot. I started taking the bottle out of his mouth after he'd gone through a couple of ounces and burping him (if he would burp), then having him finish off the bottle. It seemed to help cut down on the spit up episodes to some extent.

 

[mrsraggle]

Poppy666, how's the feedings going? Since I've had to supplement with formula I've noticed baby T having more spit up happening and whatnot. I started taking the bottle out of his mouth after he'd gone through a couple of ounces and burping him (if he would burp), then having him finish off the bottle. It seemed to help cut down on the spit up episodes to some extent.

We do this too. Ellie is only sick if I fail to get a burp up and she burps herself.

 

[kimmyjane84]

Hi all, just thought I'd post to say hi and update you on all that is going on etc...

Jess seems to be doing a little better with her Gaviscon now and is not being sick after all her feeds... Having said that, she has been a bit more sicky today

Me, Harry and Jess all have colds now, which is REALLY not good

My HV has diagnosed me with having borderline PND, which has made me feel even more tearful etc than I was prior to her saying this. Got my 6-8 week check with the doctor next week, so she should be able to confirm this (or not) and make suggestions for what to do next.

Ah poooooo, got to dash - Jess needs her feed!! Will try to post again soon xx

 

[Freyasmum]

Hi everyone. How are you all doing?

It's hard to believe Ollie is over 2 months old already, but then it also kinda feels like he's been here forever, iykwim.
He is getting bigger and bigger (obviously!) and developing more personality everyday. He is so smiley and fun. He's also very alert, and seems to be able to see much greater distances than I thought he'd be able to.
We're going to have to put his cot together and move him into it in the next week or so - he keeps bashing his arms on the sides of his bassinet!

I've been having a bit of trouble getting Ollie to take his bottle lately. He's been guzzling the first bit, then stopping and he just won't go back to it. It's not that he's not hungry - he'll happily BF right away. I think I'm going to have to try leaving, and get OH to try while I'm not around. I have to go back to work mid-July, so need to get it sorted before then. I've been trying to switch him completely to formula, but slowly, so that it doesn't cause me too much discomfort.

Hope everyone is doing well. It'd be good to see some more pics around here too. I'll start the ball rolling...

 

[mommyof3girls]

Hi everyone. How are you all doing?

It's hard to believe Ollie is over 2 months old already, but then it also kinda feels like he's been here forever, iykwim.
He is getting bigger and bigger (obviously!) and developing more personality everyday. He is so smiley and fun. He's also very alert, and seems to be able to see much greater distances than I thought he'd be able to.
We're going to have to put his cot together and move him into it in the next week or so - he keeps bashing his arms on the sides of his bassinet!

I've been having a bit of trouble getting Ollie to take his bottle lately. He's been guzzling the first bit, then stopping and he just won't go back to it. It's not that he's not hungry - he'll happily BF right away. I think I'm going to have to try leaving, and get OH to try while I'm not around. I have to go back to work mid-July, so need to get it sorted before then. I've been trying to switch him completely to formula, but slowly, so that it doesn't cause me too much discomfort.

Hope everyone is doing well. It'd be good to see some more pics around here too. I'll start the ball rolling...

Wow he has a head full of hair. Both of your kids are super cute.

 

[mrsraggle]

I'm happy to share some photos! I took these yesterday (Ellie's 5 weeks now):

https://i220.photobucket.com/albums/dd169/rachelwestlake/DSC_0140.jpg
https://i220.photobucket.com/albums/dd169/rachelwestlake/DSC_0143.jpg
https://i220.photobucket.com/albums/dd169/rachelwestlake/DSC_0147-pola.jpg
https://i220.photobucket.com/albums/dd169/rachelwestlake/DSC_0155colour.jpg

 

[mommyof3girls]

I'm happy to share some photos! I took these yesterday (Ellie's 5 weeks now):

https://i220.photobucket.com/albums/dd169/rachelwestlake/DSC_0140.jpg
https://i220.photobucket.com/albums/dd169/rachelwestlake/DSC_0143.jpg
https://i220.photobucket.com/albums/dd169/rachelwestlake/DSC_0147-pola.jpg
https://i220.photobucket.com/albums/dd169/rachelwestlake/DSC_0155colour.jpg

I love your pictures.

 

[mommyof3girls]

Kinleigh rolled from her back to her belly for the first time today. Mommy and Daddy were both there to see it. She will be 11 weeks old tomorrow.

 

[555ann555]

Kinleigh rolled from her back to her belly for the first time today. Mommy and Daddy were both there to see it. She will be 11 weeks old tomorrow.

That's amazing! Were there any signs leading up to it that she was going to start moving soon?

 

[mommyof3girls]

Kinleigh rolled from her back to her belly for the first time today. Mommy and Daddy were both there to see it. She will be 11 weeks old tomorrow.

That's amazing! Were there any signs leading up to it that she was going to start moving soon?

When I woke up in the mornings for the past 2 weeks she had managed to be laying on her side so I figured it could not be long. She had been rolling from her belly to her back since she was 6 weeks old.

 

[Minstermind]

Those are absolutely lovely pictures MrsRaggle!

Can't wait to see my little man roll onto his belly too. All these little moments of seeing the slightest little changes in them. It's so fun!

Here's my wee man

 

[kimmyjane84]

I've just loaded some photos to PB, so thought I'd share some of them with you all

Jess at 1 hour old
https://i166.photobucket.com/albums/u86/kimmyjane84/Kids/26266_389635167521_512417521_451187.jpg

2 hours old
https://i166.photobucket.com/albums/u86/kimmyjane84/Kids/26266_389635172521_512417521_451187.jpg

First bath at home
https://i166.photobucket.com/albums/u86/kimmyjane84/Kids/P09-05-10_1520.jpg

Looking cute in the outfit daddy bought for me
https://i166.photobucket.com/albums/u86/kimmyjane84/Kids/P30-04-10_1359.jpg

Hello
https://i166.photobucket.com/albums/u86/kimmyjane84/Kids/P28-05-10_1548.jpg

Looking very tiny in big bro's cot
https://i166.photobucket.com/albums/u86/kimmyjane84/Kids/P28-05-10_1921.jpg

Pretty baby
https://i166.photobucket.com/albums/u86/kimmyjane84/Kids/P23-05-10_1747.jpg