Aussies trying to get duffered aged 20+ !!!

[Abby27]

Smithy that sounds like a plan! c'mon little eggies, out you pop!

Welcome Halliwell!

im feeling a bit glum this afternoon i think may be its the TTC doubt. you ever get that? like it will never happen so you get a little glum?
any way i will try and chipper up! ive put on some golden girls!

Angel im glad you liked the table. its my first and only woodwork adventure. not sure what the wood is, i found it years ago, these big planks that were being thrown out. So a friend that i taught to crochet taught me how to work with wood!

 

[Abby27]

Maddy you might have to go on some late night romantic walks! te he!

 

[Maddy40]

Abby I feel down and 'it's never going to happen' all the time. It's all just sooo darn depressing sometimes. How long will you try before seeing a specialist?

 

[Abby27]

Well my doctor said to see her after 6 months, this is month 5. I should mention that were were not preventing for a year or so, then stopped so i wouldnt be duffered for our wedding, then once we got married i started temping, OPKing, and taking vitex. before this year had a cycle out of whack, now at least its getting back to normal. I got really sick earlier this year and the doctor felt that it was part of the reason it hadnt happened thus far....but im better now, and so she gave the thumbs up. said to come back in six months or when i need a preg confirmed. I know that 5 months isnt that long in the scheme of things...my sister tried for two years! no reason it didnt happen it just took two years! for both her kids!
any way so if it doesnt wrk this month i might go back and have a chat to the doctor. may be get SA done.

 

[Pauls_angel]

Maddy and Abby I think we all get that way - just not as easy as you think it will be - so much of my sex Ed both from home and school growing up was about preventing it cos it can happen easily - am thinking that we were all brainwashed a little and less prepared for reality than we should have been!

Maddy perhaps sending DD to a nice movie or encouraging her to take long walks or to head to a park with a good book will be in order to give you some 'alone time' with DH! Hope it all works out and that this is your month!!

 

[Melainey]

Yeah I agree with you ladies!I get that feeling all the time! but this month I am feeling a little more relaxed for some reason let's hope that's a good thing xx

 

[Abby27]

i think i get ovulation blues/bitchy. like PMS but ovulation. is that even a thing? it just seems that the two times i get myself in "the bad place" are just before Ov and just before AF. I guess cause they are milestones in the whole TTC process.

 

[Pauls_angel]

Your turn will be soon hun! Hopefully this month x

 

[ginny83]

Maddy and Abby I think we all get that way - just not as easy as you think it will be - so much of my sex Ed both from home and school growing up was about preventing it cos it can happen easily - am thinking that we were all brainwashed a little and less prepared for reality than we should have been!

Maddy perhaps sending DD to a nice movie or encouraging her to take long walks or to head to a park with a good book will be in order to give you some 'alone time' with DH! Hope it all works out and that this is your month!!

Angel - I so agree with you about people needing to be educated about fertility earlier. Far enough not to tell teenagers that for some people it isn't always an easy road to falling pregnant, but I think that once you turn maybe 20 or something you should be told how fertility does decrease with age or it can take up to a year to fall pregant and that's completely normal.

Not saying this should force people in ttc earlier, but more just about educating people in knowing how our bodies work so we have more options.

 

[Pauls_angel]

Agreed Ginny I know I had no idea until recently just how hard it is for so many - I really thought it was only the minority who found it hard!

 

[LLPM]

I agree Ginny...it's not always that simple (we're all testament to that!)
Obviously people are waiting longer to have kids for their own personal reasons, wanting financial security, bigger house, women don't seem to like the idea of being a 'stay at home mum' anymore, not feeling ready, not having a partner (i get this is huge and unavoidable for many!!) etc but even despite the knowing that fertility decreases with age people are still waiting...would like to hear some of your opinions?!
We planned poppy when I was only 20, I was mortified when peoples comments were along the lines of "oops, accident baby??" or "why do you want a baby now, live your life and enjoy being young!" as if we couldn't possibly have planned it - that would be irresponsible! But the reality is prime fertility is between 19-24, why would I wait til I was older than that to start trying...it just didn't make sense to me when I added it up! I think the info out there is really misleading...suggesting that once you're over 35, ferility drops dramatically (i agree it does for sure...evidence is out there to back it up!)but often articles fail to state that fertility starts to decline at 27!
I totally understand you all have your reasons for starting to TTC when you did...but interested to know what made you start TTC at the time you did?

 

[Abby27]

For me i wouldve loved to have started when i was younger...but i just didnt have a partner! tragically single for many many many years, and actually I would be very depressed about it...worried it would never happen (huh sound familiar!).

So my DH is really the first committed relationship that ive ever had....had the odd boyfriend that would last about a month... may be once every two years! So when we started our relationship there was an adjustment period to being a couple....i was on my own so long. But it wasnt too long before we ditched BC to just see what happened.

i wish i had started being more serious about TTC back when we ditched BC. I made sure i took folate and iodine etc, but i didnt chart or anything. any way, what can you do!


(Id also LOVE to be a stay home mum!)

 

[LLPM]

For me i wouldve loved to have started when i was younger...but i just didnt have a partner! tragically single for many many many years, and actually I would be very depressed about it...worried it would never happen (huh sound familiar!).

So my DH is really the first committed relationship that ive ever had....had the odd boyfriend that would last about a month... may be once every two years! So when we started our relationship there was an adjustment period to being a couple....i was on my own so long. But it wasnt too long before we ditched BC to just see what happened.


(Id also LOVE to be a stay home mum!)

I'm so glad your DH came along for you! I have so many lovely single girl friends who would love kids! So I can totally see where you're coming from! My sisters hubby is 11years older than her and he's a bit the same...getting married was a huge change for him, and has taken a lot of adjustment after being single for many years, so they're the same they. Just aren't at that point to want kids yet! (I mean they really want them but know they need to be a couple for a bit longer first!)

 

[Maddy40]

i think i get ovulation blues/bitchy. like PMS but ovulation. is that even a thing? it just seems that the two times i get myself in "the bad place" are just before Ov and just before AF. I guess cause they are milestones in the whole TTC process.

OMG me TOO! I never have PMS but I get so sh*tty in my 2 days of O!

 

[Abby27]

I actually met him when i was 20! then we parted and met again 10 years later! bugger huh!
but im glad i waited. i have friends who married people because they felt pressure etc and they have kids now, but are getting divorced and such. which is sad.
My DH is a sweetie, kind, shy, funny, would move the earth if he thought it would make me happy! and hey i never thought that i would be so lucky to have a great hubby! (or even get married, or even have a boyfriend that wasnt a *******) so may be i should stop my baby stressing too!

 

[Abby27]

Maddy it must be a thing! POS!
Pre Ovulation Stress

 

[Pauls_angel]

We waited at first because we wanted time together first. We were almost 24 when we hot married I then went to uni full time ten months later - for the 4 years of my degree I was working part time and studying full time and paul was working 2 jobs. We felt we hadn't really had much time together just us as a result. I was keen to ttc about 6 months after finishing uni but paul wasn't quite ready. 2 years after that (earlier this year) he said he was ready to ttc - we ntnp for a month ans then decided to seriously ttc - that lasted nearly 4 cycles when I was told to stop ttc by my doc. A month and half later here we are!

 

[Maddy40]

I totally understand you all have your reasons for starting to TTC when you did...but interested to know what made you start TTC at the time you did?

I never had a maternal (as in "wanting to give birth") bone in my body until a few months ago. I went through life as a single adoptive mum with a great job and really didn't think much about it. I didn't even meet DH until I was 37 so I guess I may have just pushed all the feelings down - but I honestly don't recall EVER wanting to do the biological-child thing.

12 months after we married I had to have gyno surgery and since that time we'd been NTNP but really didn't expect anything to happen, given my age. Early in 2012 we had a natural BFP which went to 11wks. I think that must have kick-started my hormones and here I am at 41yo trying to conceive.

I think I posted elsewhere today that I AM that cartoon- the one that says "OMG I forgot to have children". Yup, that's me!

 

[Newbie32]

Ladies I am so behind!!! I've got pages to read and need to catch up but am just frantic from place to place!!!

Hopefully I'll have some time on Friday xxx

I miss you all heaps girls...my temps are spaz because I'm not sleeping well, no early egg drop yet!! Fingers crossed I keep myself stressed out enough to delay!

Much love, I'll try to get on and read soon! Xxx

 

[Trying2b2mums]

lucy- valid points and good question. I was in a committed relationship from 17-21, engaged (he was a he, haha) We wanted a family, married the whole nine. I m/c at 5 months in 2003, our relationship didn't survive much longer after that, for multiple reasons, and that was one of the best things that ever happened to me- the break up, not mc. Then went dating crazy for a few years. Then I was with another guy, (a really good friend to me these days, who is married now with a 3 month old) on and off for two years but it never worked out, I always knew he would be a wonderful father and that was where my attraction laid for him. Then i took a few years out, single, trying to figure me out, and found a lot of answers. I always always knew i was going to be a mum, just happened much later than planned. When I met OH we both knew we wanted kids immediately, but due to the fact that we're not too crazy insane - we were in a new, international relationship, we wanted to get my status in the country settled so nothing happened and time between us so we were stable before ttc. So that puts me at 29 nearly 30 with our first. Ideally I would have been much younger, but wasn't with the right partner. Same goes for most of my friends, we all planned to be married/kids by 24/25, but we're 29/30 and two of us are pregnant, one is married, and the others still have another year or two before they ttc, waiting for the rings, etc, we just didnt find the right partners in the time frame, Cant rush these important things