Bellys to Bumps

[Traskey]

Zowiey, I am really sorry about the evap line. I swear I am beginning to hate pregnancy tests I hear about this so often.

I think Lovie may have a good point about the smoking and drugs. Does he have to have another SA tomorrow? It could be that the stress has gotten to be too much for him. Not that that is any excuse though. Have you really sat down and talked about ttc? About how it makes you feel and him? After 2 years and seven months the stress must be taking it's toll a little.

I am glad he felt remorse though and tried to make it up to you, I would have been just as pissed as you are!

 

[StrawberryTTC]

zowiey Sorry you've had a terrible weekend. I can sort of guess how you must be feeling, a little. You know that my dh wanted to wait to get all the tests etc started, hence we're waiting till June to get that ball rolling? I felt terrible when I realized he doesn't want to go see a dr yet, like he wasn't putting as much into this as I am, not doing everything he possibly could to help! It was a horrible feeling, like he didn't care about me and what I was feeling at all! But then I just had to realize that he has different ways of dealing with things than I do, and I know from past issues that he has a tendency to deny things are wrong for a while before starting to deal with them, and that this can't be hurried along without making him very uncomfortable.

Perhaps it's something like this with your dh too, and what lovie said above? Men often do feel that if their sperm isn't great that they're not really men, and knowing that you want a baby so bad and it's because of him that you're not getting it must be very hard to deal with. Sometimes we deal with things in ways that are in no way constructive - I've dealt with bad weigh-ins in weightloss with a tub of ice cream! Not quite the same I know, but still. I'd tell my dh what you said here, that the worst thing is that I feel like he didn't even think of me at all, not the fact that he smoked or whatever, but that he's refusing to do his part and not even tell me about it! Getting home that late without telling me would cause a MAJOR scene at our house alone. Hope you manage to talk about it, have a good heart to heart and get it all out there, and understand each other better after it all.

We did clean the house, I even scrubbed the bathroom floor on my knees to get it properly clean! Feeling quite tired and sore now. But happy I've done both my exercise and a major clean of the house, now can just watch tv with the dh. =)

 

[Tarkwa]

Zowiey, I'm sorry you've had a shitty weekend hun. Can't believe what your DH did - I'm angry with you too hun . I'm sorry about the evap and the bfn - life seems to be dishing up the crap on your plate right now. I think Lovie has given some good advice - just talk to him - after all, you're both adults trying to bring another life into this world. If he wants to make it up to you he can explain why he's doing the stuff he has been. You could be quite blunt and ask him if he's doing this because he doesn't want a baby (I'm sure that isn't the case hun, but it might shock him into realising how much this means to you). I don't know what else to say hun, as I haven't been in a position anything like this, but I'm here for you, as are the other ladies I'm sure.
Sending you lots of and a big slap to your DH!!!!!
xxx

 

[twinkle1975]

Zowiey - so sorry DH is being a knob - big slaps from me too. My Dh said he's give up drinking to try & help sort his sluggish swimmers out but since we've found out I'm not ovulating he's started again - men don't seem to be able to see long term sometimes!
I'm hacked off today as I have a UTI & keep running to the loo and of course we can't BD!

 

[cranberry987]

My knobhead still drinks too. So much for solidarity :Grr:

 

[zowiey]

Thanks ladies,

We have talked, well he has and I've just listened. He basically feels like his life is on hold, and he can't do the things he wants too, drinking and smoking (just fags) He knows that he has to stop, and has promised to make a big effort. I think it's a shock to him that we are having to have treatment, I'm pretty sure when we first went to the doctors he thought we would be sent away. He has said more than once that he doesn't think ttc for 2 1/2 yrs is that long!! He isn't to hurt that his sperm isn't to great, but he had an uncle that had the same problems, and they went on to have 3 children naturally, so he thinks it will be the same for us.

I spoke to his mum, and she did say that he has always ignored any problems he has. He would rather bury his head in the hope the problem will disappear, than actually tackle it. Whereas I research everything to death. Before we started ttc, I had 2 pregnancy books and loads of info on ttc!
I'm still not happy, and I'm still hurting so much, but I know we have bigger things to worry about (Weds) and by golly if he pulls this shit on me again, I am going to smash the crap out of his car! (I'm not a violent person, honest!)

 

[zowiey]

Oh and just add, he did his last SA about 2/3 weeks ago, so I do think he thought he was "safe"!! Doesn't matter how many times I tell him it takes 3 months for sperm to regenerate! :doh:

 

[StrawberryTTC]

zowiey glad you had a chance to talk things out, even if it doesn't take the hurt or anger away, at least you can understand him a bit better. Though I have to say it: men! No logic, huh?

But you two sound a lot like me and my dh, he likes to ignore problems as far as he can, whereas I do the same as you and research them to death (well put, btw!). Makes it difficult sometimes to understand each other. I don't remember how old you are, but in our case my dh isn't in that much of a hurry either, and seems to conveniently ignore the fact that I'm 32 so not young by ttc standards and we can't afford to wait around much longer! I don't think men really realize the urgency us women can have...

AFM the slight gain was gone this morning and I'm terribly sore from the workouts on the weekend! Good soreness though. =) Plus got a decent amount of ewcm this morning so ovulation is definitely approaching.

 

[cranberry987]

Morning

Planned out my food for today and I'm under the calories planned so all good that's with a few snacks. Going to try drink loads of water today which should help with any hunger

Planning on going for a run this morning but bed is so comfy!

 

[EmmyReece]

Good idea on the food planning hun, I might try that once I've got this week over and done with

Still lots of cramps here, temp went up slightly this morning so am hoping that it's for a good reason

 

[4magpies]

Ahh sorry about the evap, I had a really nasty evap last month, its laughable now, but I was so upset.

I am gonna join back in posting again here now as I am desperate to get my BMI under 30.

We are waiting for our next FS appointment (should be june time) and I want to have a good BMI for then for referral for IVF.

Love and hugs too you all.

xxx

 

[EmmyReece]

sorry you had an evap hun

Good luck with losing the last bit of weight, we're all behind you

 

[lovie]

hi ladies

zowie im glad you had a good chat with your hubby, I hope that is the last time he does that to you, and fair play with the car! id do exactly the same! I think men dont see ttc in the same way we do, mine says we can go and see a doctor in another year if im still not pregnant... well thats not going to happen, come september the 1st he will be at the doctors or i will move back to england, I mean why wait, its not like anything is going to change! men grrrr!

cranberry your food plan sounds great! I have a super busy day im off to a meeting then of to do some tutoring and the out for a pubquiz tonight, so my plan is to drink lots of water and then make low fat mayo and tuna pasta for dinner and have a diet coke at the pub!

yay for the temp rise emmy does that make you 9dpo? how exciting

strawberry yay for the slight gain going! andewcm bring on OV!!

twinkle i hope your uti gets better soon, you poor thing! are you drinking cranberry juice?

I am in love with my supliments!! they made my AF so much easier! If i have another 28 day cycle with no spots and no bad pain i will actually marry my EPO and AC!! I will take them untill i get my menopause! (the seronade is me loving my supliments) id definatly recomend them to everyone!

xxx

 

[twinkle1975]

Heehee lovie - you made me laugh!!

 

[imogenwanted]

obem and crying already shop she does take home 3

 

[Lil_Pixie]

Aww man!

I sts this week again! I'm so angry with myself!
I only ned one pound and I'll be in the 12s - I was 12.13 on thurs but it doesn't count till wi day and it didn't last that long!

Af is due today or tomorrow too so it's gonna be a bad week. Frowny face

 

[lovie]

aww lil pixie dont worry about a sts, especially when AF is due, i allways weigh more just before a visit from AF... as if AF isnt bad enough with the pain, running to the loo to change pads, disapointment... but we have to weigh more aswell! not fair!!

imogen wanted i will have to try and get obem online, i hope it isnt too sad!

AFM i am going to a weight watchers meeting today, im a little scared as it will be in swedish, but i hope i can understand some of it! also im scared that i will weigh alot more as i wont be naked!

xxx

 

[StrawberryTTC]

Good morning ladies!

Lil pixie I always stay the same or usually gain around af, not fair is it? But hopefully it's just af for you as well, as that's water weight and will be gone soon after af.

cranberry did you mean you plan what you eat for the whole day beforehand? I always do that, helps me stick to my calorie limit. Of course sometimes I stray from my plan, but usually I stick to it pretty closely.

lovie good luck with the meeting! Were you finding it difficult to lose weight on your own, or are you using it as an opportunity to use your Swedish? =)

Nothing new here, weight slightly down again. Will be interesting to see what the dr says about my slow weight loss. Probably nothing as she won't believe I don't secretly eat a lot more than I mark down! Did an hour of yoga yesterday, felt really good with my sore muscles, and have a back massage booked for today so that should take care of the rest of it.

Hope you all have a good day!

 

[cranberry987]

Hi

Yep, I count all the calories in the food so i can jiggle things about if needs be. I use myfitnesspal which has a mobile app which is great. Not used to limiting myself as Ive usually done SW, but I feel good so far doing this.

Weighed myself today and lost 2lbs Plan is to look into IVF for September if we need it so thats half a stone a month I need to lose Im sure I'll be able to get it off if I rly try, or maybe do LL if im not quite there for September.

Made myself a yummy bagel for lunch and have had my porridge, just gotta avoid eating crap all day! Working from home and its rly slow at the moment so nothing to do but eat. I used to eat fruit all day on SW, but cant do that now. Have some cucomber and water - Lunch in 2hrs, but Im not hungry, just peckish.

 

[StrawberryTTC]

I know what you mean, I was used to not counting most veggies and fruit (had done WW in the past), but when you're counting calories, you can't ignore that they too contain calories. Fruit especially.

I use a similar thing, only it's an online service. Does yours keep track of other things besides calories? The one I use also keeps track of amount of veggies/fruits (and you got a "green light" if you eat more than 600grams per day), fiber (green light for over 25grams), the amounts of fat/protein (need enough fat and protein, and the good type of fat to get a green light) and amount of treats (if you get more than 100grams or 10% of your daily calories from treats=foods that contain little useful things like fiber or vitamins etc but have calories in them you get a red light). I find that very useful, as I've tended to ignore the quality of the food I eat, and just focus on the amount of calories/points. Oh and of course it also keeps track of exercise, too.

Oh almost forgot - yay for 2lbs!