nkbapbt
Double Preemie Momma
- Joined
- Dec 25, 2007
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Before you read this, the baby is ok. The 
is because of my husband.
I had random bleeding a few weeks ago, but because it was only a couple of weeks after my period, I thought there was no way it was implantation bleeding. I took a test too soon clearly and got a BFN, well I took one last night a on whim. Literally I was peeing, stopped and had some weird urge to take one...sure enough positive. I didn't have many signs before the positive, now I do...so odd. Well I told my husband through my tears, tears because I knew what he would feel/say. He wants me to have an abortion, because we are struggling right now money wise. I don't want too, but I also could not stand having another baby in the situation we are in now. I am basically raising Lakai alone, money is tight but not terrible. Lakai never wants for anything. Ive been able to already save $4000 for his education fund, in my mind that's pretty good.
So I agreed to at least think about it, after much debate my husband said you need to decide soon. So I said I would talk to the doctor about it.
Later that night (yesterday) he said he landed two major clients, maybe three. I asked what that would mean for our family, he said we would be "good" money wise with just two clients and great with three. And this would be months before the baby was born. And in nine months he could likely build up more.
WTF? I felt so betrayed, like he waited till I agreed to more than I was even remotely comfortable with to tell me. It feels like he manipulated me into agreeing. And I called him out on it, I said did you wait to tell me that in a few short months (Jan) money wouldn't be an issue?!. He denies it, but it does not sit right with me and frankly my gut feeling and how well I know him....I think I am right. Ive been together off and on for 14 years...I think I have a good sense of the man.
I was fuming. He said we couldn't talk about it because he was too tired to think straight, as he never gets enough sleep...another rant.
I explained having an abortion could cause me to never have another baby, or make the fact Im a risk for a preemie worse. He never thought about that.
He claims that it was more than just money issues, it was also how would care for the baby...well that should be more like how would I since I already do care totally for Lakai so my husband can work from home without being bothered (he is self employed), and how would Lakai deal with it (something I do see eye to eye with him on but think when would Lakai ever deal with it better?).
It felt like he was trying to back track on his first claim of it only being about money. He then said I thought you were worried about more than money too, well I wasn't.
I am so angry and I am not sure if it's the pregnancy hormones or what...what do you lovely ladies think? How would you feel?
is because of my husband.I had random bleeding a few weeks ago, but because it was only a couple of weeks after my period, I thought there was no way it was implantation bleeding. I took a test too soon clearly and got a BFN, well I took one last night a on whim. Literally I was peeing, stopped and had some weird urge to take one...sure enough positive. I didn't have many signs before the positive, now I do...so odd. Well I told my husband through my tears, tears because I knew what he would feel/say. He wants me to have an abortion, because we are struggling right now money wise. I don't want too, but I also could not stand having another baby in the situation we are in now. I am basically raising Lakai alone, money is tight but not terrible. Lakai never wants for anything. Ive been able to already save $4000 for his education fund, in my mind that's pretty good.
So I agreed to at least think about it, after much debate my husband said you need to decide soon. So I said I would talk to the doctor about it.
Later that night (yesterday) he said he landed two major clients, maybe three. I asked what that would mean for our family, he said we would be "good" money wise with just two clients and great with three. And this would be months before the baby was born. And in nine months he could likely build up more.
WTF? I felt so betrayed, like he waited till I agreed to more than I was even remotely comfortable with to tell me. It feels like he manipulated me into agreeing. And I called him out on it, I said did you wait to tell me that in a few short months (Jan) money wouldn't be an issue?!. He denies it, but it does not sit right with me and frankly my gut feeling and how well I know him....I think I am right. Ive been together off and on for 14 years...I think I have a good sense of the man.
I was fuming. He said we couldn't talk about it because he was too tired to think straight, as he never gets enough sleep...another rant.
I explained having an abortion could cause me to never have another baby, or make the fact Im a risk for a preemie worse. He never thought about that.
He claims that it was more than just money issues, it was also how would care for the baby...well that should be more like how would I since I already do care totally for Lakai so my husband can work from home without being bothered (he is self employed), and how would Lakai deal with it (something I do see eye to eye with him on but think when would Lakai ever deal with it better?).
It felt like he was trying to back track on his first claim of it only being about money. He then said I thought you were worried about more than money too, well I wasn't.
I am so angry and I am not sure if it's the pregnancy hormones or what...what do you lovely ladies think? How would you feel?
