Breast feeding in public? Your views?

[Pearls18]

If your father or brothers were in the same room with you, how discrete would you be. I've seen lots of people say they cover for male family but not for strangers. That's seems weird to me.

Again you are assuming breasts as sexual objects, what has the fact they are male to do with anything??

 

[Natsku]

I mean how hard is it to use your child as a shield? Or to have a blanket or burp cloth placed on top of your boob that you could easily slide down. No one is saying your priority shouldn't be your child. But you can focus on your child while limiting showing your full breast to the world. A little effort goes a long way.

Slide it down with what hand? If both my hands are occupied trying to latch my baby back on how do I slide a blanket over my incredibly offensive breast?
I'm lucky as I have small breasts and Maria's head did mostly hide it, unless she moved a lot, but like Tasha said, thats not true for all women.

How old is your baby. You still have to latch them in with both hands? I mean someone just learning to bf has a little leeway but at some point the baby does the latching themselves. I've gotten quite skilled at propping Coen up with my leg crossed while covering myself while latching. It isn't exactly easy but it just took some practice. Maybe if you practiced being discrete at home you could be in public. But I don't think you care to be discrete so I'm not saying you have to it was just an option.

I'm talking about when Maria was 3 or 4 months old. She was a very wriggly and nosy baby and going through a bad nursing phase (refusal and fussiness) so I did still have to physically latch her back on back then as otherwise she wouldn't feed and just scream the place down.

If your father or brothers were in the same room with you, how discrete would you be. I've seen lots of people say they cover for male family but not for strangers. That's seems weird to me.

I'd feed the same way in front of my dad or my brothers as I would in front of anyone else

 

[Dk1234]

I mean how hard is it to use your child as a shield? Or to have a blanket or burp cloth placed on top of your boob that you could easily slide down. No one is saying your priority shouldn't be your child. But you can focus on your child while limiting showing your full breast to the world. A little effort goes a long way.

But the concern should be to the child, not the other people in the room?

The concern should be for everyone. Of course you care about you child first. Say my child starts screaming in a restaurant. I don't cover their mouth and smother them to shut them up immediately. But, I don't completely disregard others by letting them scream while I change their diaper or rock them or figure out what's wrong. Ill remove myself if I can't calm them down quickly. It's courtesy and its now we live civilly in this world.

What has screaming got to do with this? Because I am unable to feed discretely (I would be really keen to know how you would feed a fidgetty baby discreetly with size G breasts and needing to use both hands to latch the baby btw, maybe you could tell us all as you have it nailed so well) I either have to let them scream which isn't civil as you say, or 'remove myself from the situation', so basically feed in private? Answer me this, if a woman isn't physically capeable of feeding her child without a little exposure that some women managed to avoid, should this said woman not feed at all in public to be civil????

The screaming baby was an example. I used it to illustrate how it would be if mothers had the same attitude they have towards BFing discretely toward everything. I mean I'm sure none of you let your baby scream in restaurants because you have regard for others so I just don't know why showing a full breast is any different.

To answer you question, I think that'a really hard for me to answer because I can't imagine a scenario where it being impossible to ever cover yourself at least enough to where people walking by couldn't see everything. If the baby is that fidgety than you could get them use to nursing with a cover. I have been BFing for 7 months and my son was quite fidgety and almost impossible to latch at first but I practiced being discrete while I was at home and personally I didn't nip til I was comfortable. I got him use to bottles of ebm early and inused those or I went to a handicap accessible bathroom or dressing room. There is a store in my town that has awesome dressing rooms and I went there lots of times in the beginning just to feed. I just think there are options maybe not the same as mine, but options.

 

[Dk1234]

If your father or brothers were in the same room with you, how discrete would you be. I've seen lots of people say they cover for male family but not for strangers. That's seems weird to me.

Again you are assuming breasts as sexual objects, what has the fact they are male to do with anything??

Because even in this conversation a member mentioned a vice tally flashing her dad and it making him uncomfortable. Just like what I've said, I've heard a lot of people say they cover for make family members but not for strangers. I didn't say it they did. Also I'm not assuming breasts are sexual such is life and they may not seem very sexual to you or me right now but you aren't gonna change that in society.

 

[Dk1234]

I mean how hard is it to use your child as a shield? Or to have a blanket or burp cloth placed on top of your boob that you could easily slide down. No one is saying your priority shouldn't be your child. But you can focus on your child while limiting showing your full breast to the world. A little effort goes a long way.

Slide it down with what hand? If both my hands are occupied trying to latch my baby back on how do I slide a blanket over my incredibly offensive breast?
I'm lucky as I have small breasts and Maria's head did mostly hide it, unless she moved a lot, but like Tasha said, thats not true for all women.

How old is your baby. You still have to latch them in with both hands? I mean someone just learning to bf has a little leeway but at some point the baby does the latching themselves. I've gotten quite skilled at propping Coen up with my leg crossed while covering myself while latching. It isn't exactly easy but it just took some practice. Maybe if you practiced being discrete at home you could be in public. But I don't think you care to be discrete so I'm not saying you have to it was just an option.

I breastfed for 9 months and DS never latched himself.

I think you could have benefitted from a lactation consultant then. That isn't normal feeding behavior. Not that anything was wrong but you could have probably made things easier by seeing one.

 

[Pearls18]

I mean how hard is it to use your child as a shield? Or to have a blanket or burp cloth placed on top of your boob that you could easily slide down. No one is saying your priority shouldn't be your child. But you can focus on your child while limiting showing your full breast to the world. A little effort goes a long way.

But the concern should be to the child, not the other people in the room?

The concern should be for everyone. Of course you care about you child first. Say my child starts screaming in a restaurant. I don't cover their mouth and smother them to shut them up immediately. But, I don't completely disregard others by letting them scream while I change their diaper or rock them or figure out what's wrong. Ill remove myself if I can't calm them down quickly. It's courtesy and its now we live civilly in this world.

What has screaming got to do with this? Because I am unable to feed discretely (I would be really keen to know how you would feed a fidgetty baby discreetly with size G breasts and needing to use both hands to latch the baby btw, maybe you could tell us all as you have it nailed so well) I either have to let them scream which isn't civil as you say, or 'remove myself from the situation', so basically feed in private? Answer me this, if a woman isn't physically capeable of feeding her child without a little exposure that some women managed to avoid, should this said woman not feed at all in public to be civil????

The screaming baby was an example. I used it to illustrate how it would be if mothers had the same attitude they have towards BFing discretely toward everything. I mean I'm sure none of you let your baby scream in restaurants because you have regard for others so I just don't know why showing a full breast is any different.

To answer you question, I think that'a really hard for me to answer because I can't imagine a scenario where it being impossible to ever cover yourself at least enough to where people walking by couldn't see everything. If the baby is that fidgety than you could get them use to nursing with a cover. I have been BFing for 7 months and my son was quite fidgety and almost impossible to latch at first but I practiced being discrete while I was at home and personally I didn't nip til I was comfortable. I got him use to bottles of ebm early and inused those or I went to a handicap accessible bathroom or dressing room. There is a store in my town that has awesome dressing rooms and I went there lots of times in the beginning just to feed. I just think there are options maybe not the same as mine, but options.

Those were YOUR choices, why should we all do the same as you? I have two problems with your argument 1) your inability to understand not everybody sees breasts as a sexual object or something to be ashamed of when they are being used for feeding 2) your inability to understand not everybody will have the same BF experiences as you, my DS got too hot under a cover he slipped off a lot and a cover was a nuisance when I was trying to get him on and off again. And for those reasons this discussion is hitting a brick wall.

 

[Pearls18]

I mean how hard is it to use your child as a shield? Or to have a blanket or burp cloth placed on top of your boob that you could easily slide down. No one is saying your priority shouldn't be your child. But you can focus on your child while limiting showing your full breast to the world. A little effort goes a long way.

Slide it down with what hand? If both my hands are occupied trying to latch my baby back on how do I slide a blanket over my incredibly offensive breast?
I'm lucky as I have small breasts and Maria's head did mostly hide it, unless she moved a lot, but like Tasha said, thats not true for all women.

How old is your baby. You still have to latch them in with both hands? I mean someone just learning to bf has a little leeway but at some point the baby does the latching themselves. I've gotten quite skilled at propping Coen up with my leg crossed while covering myself while latching. It isn't exactly easy but it just took some practice. Maybe if you practiced being discrete at home you could be in public. But I don't think you care to be discrete so I'm not saying you have to it was just an option.

I breastfed for 9 months and DS never latched himself.

I think you could have benefitted from a lactation consultant then. That isn't normal feeding behavior. Not that anything was wrong but you could have probably made things easier by seeing one.

Thank you for the condescending message but I am very proud of our breastfeeding journey and do not need your high and mighty attitude telling me what is and isn't normal behaviour. Why are you so stubborn to think you are doing everything perfectly and every one will experience what you experience?? I think you need to write a book, you obviously have it sussed.

 

[Dk1234]

I don't have an inability to understand I just think you had options. And about not everyone seeing them as sexual. Of course not everyone does. I don't, I still don't really want to see anyone's while I'm eating my dinner. Gay men probably don't. Evolved people. Breastfeeding mothers . Lots of people probably dont see them as sexual. It doesn't mean everyone doesn't and this those people shouldn't be considered. And also if speaking about society the vast majority don't share your opinions. At least not in my area or in America.

 

[Dk1234]

I mean how hard is it to use your child as a shield? Or to have a blanket or burp cloth placed on top of your boob that you could easily slide down. No one is saying your priority shouldn't be your child. But you can focus on your child while limiting showing your full breast to the world. A little effort goes a long way.

Slide it down with what hand? If both my hands are occupied trying to latch my baby back on how do I slide a blanket over my incredibly offensive breast?
I'm lucky as I have small breasts and Maria's head did mostly hide it, unless she moved a lot, but like Tasha said, thats not true for all women.

How old is your baby. You still have to latch them in with both hands? I mean someone just learning to bf has a little leeway but at some point the baby does the latching themselves. I've gotten quite skilled at propping Coen up with my leg crossed while covering myself while latching. It isn't exactly easy but it just took some practice. Maybe if you practiced being discrete at home you could be in public. But I don't think you care to be discrete so I'm not saying you have to it was just an option.

I breastfed for 9 months and DS never latched himself.

I think you could have benefitted from a lactation consultant then. That isn't normal feeding behavior. Not that anything was wrong but you could have probably made things easier by seeing one.

Thank you for the condescending message but I am very proud of our breastfeeding journey and do not need your high and mighty attitude telling me what is and isn't normal behaviour. Why are you so stubborn to think you are doing everything perfectly and every one will experience what you experience?? I think you need to write a book, you obviously have it sussed.

Excuse me? Ok I'm done debating now. Do you know how many times people are told they should see a lc? Visit the BFing section it isn't condescension it's help. If you can't debate without being rude And looking for a right where there isn't one I'm not gonna debate with you. How rude.

 

[Pearls18]

I don't have an inability to understand I just think you had options. And about not everyone seeing them as sexual. Of course not everyone does. I don't, I still don't really want to see anyone's while I'm eating my dinner. Gay men probably don't. Evolved people. Breastfeeding mothers . Lots of people probably dont see them as sexual. It doesn't mean everyone doesn't and this those people shouldn't be considered. And also if speaking about society the vast majority don't share your opinions. At least not in my area or in America.

You're giving me options to suit YOU, why should a BF mother conform to you? It is such a self centred attitude. Seriously what is so off putting about a breast at dinner? I'm assuming you would be happy for a bottle to be left out? I don't like the way you are assuming your attitudes are right thus we should conform to you, have you thought perhaps the issue is with you and society, maybe you should change rather than the way a mother feeds a child?

 

[Tasha]

I don't have an inability to understand I just think you had options. And about not everyone seeing them as sexual. Of course not everyone does. I don't, I still don't really want to see anyone's while I'm eating my dinner. Gay men probably don't. Evolved people. Breastfeeding mothers . Lots of people probably dont see them as sexual. It doesn't mean everyone doesn't and this those people shouldn't be considered. And also if speaking about society the vast majority don't share your opinions. At least not in my area or in America.

And we have, on numerous occassions explained why those options wouldnt of worked for us. So they're not really options.

 

[Pearls18]

I mean how hard is it to use your child as a shield? Or to have a blanket or burp cloth placed on top of your boob that you could easily slide down. No one is saying your priority shouldn't be your child. But you can focus on your child while limiting showing your full breast to the world. A little effort goes a long way.

Slide it down with what hand? If both my hands are occupied trying to latch my baby back on how do I slide a blanket over my incredibly offensive breast?
I'm lucky as I have small breasts and Maria's head did mostly hide it, unless she moved a lot, but like Tasha said, thats not true for all women.

How old is your baby. You still have to latch them in with both hands? I mean someone just learning to bf has a little leeway but at some point the baby does the latching themselves. I've gotten quite skilled at propping Coen up with my leg crossed while covering myself while latching. It isn't exactly easy but it just took some practice. Maybe if you practiced being discrete at home you could be in public. But I don't think you care to be discrete so I'm not saying you have to it was just an option.

I breastfed for 9 months and DS never latched himself.

I think you could have benefitted from a lactation consultant then. That isn't normal feeding behavior. Not that anything was wrong but you could have probably made things easier by seeing one.

Thank you for the condescending message but I am very proud of our breastfeeding journey and do not need your high and mighty attitude telling me what is and isn't normal behaviour. Why are you so stubborn to think you are doing everything perfectly and every one will experience what you experience?? I think you need to write a book, you obviously have it sussed.

Excuse me? Ok I'm done debating now. Do you know how many times people are told they should see a lc? Visit the BFing section it isn't condescension it's help. If you can't debate without being rude And looking for a right where there isn't one I'm not gonna debate with you. How rude.

I wasn't asking for advise, if I asked you when I said I couldn't let him latch on himself then the LC comment would have been justified, but it was entirely unnecessary at that moment in time.

 

[Dk1234]

I'm leaving you to it now ladies. I'm not gonna be attacked because I don't share your opinions. I e been very calm and collected and never rude while I've been called a prude, said I was against BFing, and then accussed of thinking I was perfect and being condescending. I think people just should show a little consideration because its a big world with lots of different people. and if you can't do that the. It's your problem. I'm simply trying to show you a different side of things and I've been nice and respectful about it while ha I g sometimes 5 people at once arguing wih me which I think shows my maturity and respect.

 

[Natsku]

Exactly. The mothers feeding their babies aren't the ones that need to chance, its the judgemental and ignorant people who need to change.

 

[Pearls18]

I'm leaving you to it now ladies. I'm not gonna be attacked because I don't share your opinions. I e been very calm and collected and never rude while I've been called a prude, said I was against BFing, and then accussed of thinking I was perfect and being condescending. I think people just should show a little consideration because its a big world with lots of different people. and if you can't do that the. It's your problem. I'm simply trying to show you a different side of things and I've been nice and respectful about it while ha I g sometimes 5 people at once arguing wih me which I think shows my maturity and respect.

Perhaps the fact there are 5 people debating with you shows that perhaps you needed to see something from a different side. I wish you all the best with your BF journey, I am genuinely glad you have done so well with it.

 

[Tasha]

I'm leaving you to it now ladies. I'm not gonna be attacked because I don't share your opinions. I e been very calm and collected and never rude while I've been called a prude, said I was against BFing, and then accussed of thinking I was perfect and being condescending. I think people just should show a little consideration because its a big world with lots of different people. and if you can't do that the. It's your problem. I'm simply trying to show you a different side of things and I've been nice and respectful about it while ha I g sometimes 5 people at once arguing wih me which I think shows my maturity and respect.

It is debating, in the debate part of the forum, hardly call that arguing with you.

And as for the bolded, for about the millionth time in this thread, some people just can not phyiscally show the consideration that you seem to be demanding. And yes it does come across as demanding because no matter how many times we say we can not physically do x, y, z for this reason you still say but you should

 

[Natsku]

For some people if they don't experience the problem they cannot understand it.

 

[Foogirl]

And as for gay men not wanting to see a woman's nipple whilst breastfeeding, that's just downright offensive. My brother in law and his husband were two of my biggest supporters whilst breastfeeding and happily sat with me whilst I did it. They were far more relaxed about it than some of the husbands of my female friends. If there is any group of society who are going to see breasts as non sexual, its going to be gay men. They aren't repulsed at the sight of breasts and any suggestion they are shows a very grave misunderstanding of gay men.

 

[midori1999]

Same applies to nursing in public, but...

https://i40.photobucket.com/albums/e201/midori1999/whenyousayyousupportbreastfeedingbut_zpsa215cac7.png

 

[Dk1234]

And as for gay men not wanting to see a woman's nipple whilst breastfeeding, that's just downright offensive. My brother in law and his husband were two of my biggest supporters whilst breastfeeding and happily sat with me whilst I did it. They were far more relaxed about it than some of the husbands of my female friends. If there is any group of society who are going to see breasts as non sexual, its going to be gay men. They aren't repulsed at the sight of breasts and any suggestion they are shows a very grave misunderstanding of gay men.

I said they didn't see breasts as sexual. I'm seriously out of this conversation now so if your like to talk to me pm me. Don't wait til I leave and then try to take something I said and completely twist it to something offensive. I also said BFing mothers right beside it. It clearly says lots of people don't find breasts sexual.