Breastfeeding is HARD (only for exclusively breastfeeding mommies)

[Dk1234]

I had to give ebm after every feed at day 4 because my son was so jaundice he was admitted back into hospital and he lost nearly a pound. He has done great with a bottle and bf.

 

[Liesje]

For me exclusively breasfeeding would have been the easy way out, I put so much work into it. No one else has ever fed my baby (he's 5 months) so anything other than my boob has just been extra work for me. I spent 6-7 hours a day pumping trying to get my supply up.
However the first few days even without the pumping and formula where he was just trying to feed 24/7 and crying because my boobs were empty we're pretty rough. I had no idea he wasn't getting anything because everyone always told me very few women dont produce enough milk.

 

[Dk1234]

she warned everybody in the title didnt she? if you dont ebf, then move on as to not be offended! it was just a vent, a kind of humorous one, about bf, not a dig at people who choose to pump or supliment. at least thats how i read it!

This is not attacking anyone but out of curiosity. If you supplement with a few bottles of expressed breast milk a day (or even one) then you are not considered to be exclusively breastfeeding? I have never heard this before.

That's where I got confused. I felt like I was being told I don't breastfeed. Or at least not breastfeed as good as someone else.

 

[Liesje]

she warned everybody in the title didnt she? if you dont ebf, then move on as to not be offended! it was just a vent, a kind of humorous one, about bf, not a dig at people who choose to pump or supliment. at least thats how i read it!

This is not attacking anyone but out of curiosity. If you supplement with a few bottles of expressed breast milk a day (or even one) then you are not considered to be exclusively breastfeeding? I have never heard this before.

That's where I got confused. I felt like I was being told I don't breastfeed. Or at least not breastfeed as good as someone else.

I always understood exclusively breasfeeding to be boobs only, no bottles, not even expressed breastmilk. The order of "best to worst" is boob, expressed breastmilk, donor milk, then formula; because there is an order to the type of milk that comes out as you breastfeed, if you mix the hind milk and the fore milk in the bottle, you could cause digestive issues so to be the best mommy you can be (tongue in cheek), breast only is the top of the line.

 

[modo]

Ok I see. I am hoping to drop my daughters ebm suppiliments once she gains a bit more weight. She only gets 9oz a day by bottle anyway so I think the majority of her weight gain is from breast feeding directly from me.

 

[Dk1234]

she warned everybody in the title didnt she? if you dont ebf, then move on as to not be offended! it was just a vent, a kind of humorous one, about bf, not a dig at people who choose to pump or supliment. at least thats how i read it!

This is not attacking anyone but out of curiosity. If you supplement with a few bottles of expressed breast milk a day (or even one) then you are not considered to be exclusively breastfeeding? I have never heard this before.

That's where I got confused. I felt like I was being told I don't breastfeed. Or at least not breastfeed as good as someone else.

I always understood exclusively breasfeeding to be boobs only, no bottles, not even expressed breastmilk. The order of "best to worst" is boob, expressed breastmilk, donor milk, then formula; because there is an order to the type of milk that comes out as you breastfeed, if you mix the hind milk and the fore milk in the bottle, you could cause digestive issues so to be the best mommy you can be (tongue in cheek), breast only is the top of the line.

Wow! I had no idea I wasn't being the best mom I could be. Better get on that soon.

 

[Liesje]

she warned everybody in the title didnt she? if you dont ebf, then move on as to not be offended! it was just a vent, a kind of humorous one, about bf, not a dig at people who choose to pump or supliment. at least thats how i read it!

This is not attacking anyone but out of curiosity. If you supplement with a few bottles of expressed breast milk a day (or even one) then you are not considered to be exclusively breastfeeding? I have never heard this before.

That's where I got confused. I felt like I was being told I don't breastfeed. Or at least not breastfeed as good as someone else.

I always understood exclusively breasfeeding to be boobs only, no bottles, not even expressed breastmilk. The order of "best to worst" is boob, expressed breastmilk, donor milk, then formula; because there is an order to the type of milk that comes out as you breastfeed, if you mix the hind milk and the fore milk in the bottle, you could cause digestive issues so to be the best mommy you can be (tongue in cheek), breast only is the top of the line.

Wow! I had no idea I wasn't being the best mom I could be. Better get on that soon.

There was a thread about that a while ago which advised that the risks of anything other than breastfeeding should be shoved down women's throats more, even at the risk of offending people who couldn't exclusively breastfeed. (for the record I supplemented with formula so I'm way down there on the hierarchy list) but that's where I learned that tidbit of information.

 

[Bunnikins]

Reading stuff like this regarding best to worst for baby stuff, i really dunno how i survived! I was exclusively formula fed.. how on earth did i turn out so well? Ive literally never been ill other than the odd cold, never been in hospital, no issues at all, i still love my mum.. i dont hold it against her that she never breastfed me... Wouldnt even know if she hadnt told me... I always think about this when im tempted to formula feed, it wouldnt be the end of the world by any means... and one day i probably will if baby stops liking breastfeeding, if either of us stop liking it.

I hate the whole breast vs formula stuff. Both are hard. I think BF is hard, but then when i think of having to sterilise equipment and warm stuff up all the time, i actually think ive got it easy!

 

[TheNewMrs]

In my eyes, an EBF baby is one who get only breast milk. Be that from boob bottle cup or syringe....

And I give a standing ovation to all the EE-ers out there!!!

Now THEY know what hard work is!!!

 

[Bunnikins]

I agree.. worst of both worlds, sore nipples AND all the sterilising/bottle washing stuff!

 

[Dk1234]

she warned everybody in the title didnt she? if you dont ebf, then move on as to not be offended! it was just a vent, a kind of humorous one, about bf, not a dig at people who choose to pump or supliment. at least thats how i read it!

This is not attacking anyone but out of curiosity. If you supplement with a few bottles of expressed breast milk a day (or even one) then you are not considered to be exclusively breastfeeding? I have never heard this before.

That's where I got confused. I felt like I was being told I don't breastfeed. Or at least not breastfeed as good as someone else.

I always understood exclusively breasfeeding to be boobs only, no bottles, not even expressed breastmilk. The order of "best to worst" is boob, expressed breastmilk, donor milk, then formula; because there is an order to the type of milk that comes out as you breastfeed, if you mix the hind milk and the fore milk in the bottle, you could cause digestive issues so to be the best mommy you can be (tongue in cheek), breast only is the top of the line.

Wow! I had no idea I wasn't being the best mom I could be. Better get on that soon.

There was a thread about that a while ago which advised that the risks of anything other than breastfeeding should be shoved down women's throats more, even at the risk of offending people who couldn't exclusively breastfeed. (for the record I supplemented with formula so I'm way down there on the hierarchy list) but that's where I learned that tidbit of information.

Thank god I missed that one!

 

[Dk1234]

Yeah! I wish I disnt have to pump 3 times a day to keep upmy supply just to throw it all down the drain because i have thrush orthat was comfortable enough to wip a boob out in public instead of have to give him a bottle and pump. It ain't easy, but very few things about parenting are.

 

[LegoHouse]

I read it more that everyone knows it's hard to express but it's hard to just BF too?

 

[BlueHadeda]

Thanx everyone! I like the tongue-in-the-cheek replies. Please do keep this light, I would really hate to have to ask to close my thread.

Like Legohouse says...it was a vent to say exclusive breastfeeding (from the breast) is HARD TOO. Not as hard, or more difficult or worse than anything else. It's just hard TOO.

In my very personal opinion...I would hate to have to exclusively express. To me, that would be the hardest. Because it's sterilising, time to express (which in my case takes way longer than what baby takes to empty the breast), plus then feeding the bottle to baby. My 2nd baby was in NICU, and I had to express for a week (throwing the milk away) before she was allowed to breastfeed. It wasn't any easier than breastfeeding.

Also...I didn't mean to say that bottlefeeding expressed breastmilk is not exclusive breastfeeding. English is my 2nd language, so I might have inadvertantly used the wrong terms. What do you call someone that only feeds from the breast?

 

[babybrums]

I think EBF is easiest! I had to pump in the beginning to get my supply up and help LO with his jaundice. That was a million times harder than just feeding from the breast, especially at night. We bed share so I can feed while I sleep. When I pumped I had to get up, feed him and then pump. Then I had to clean everything, put the milk away and get ready for the next feeding. Sometimes I was lucky if I got 30 might minute sleep. Then when he was three weeks I had to formula feed because I had surgery and testing that made my milk unsafe for the next few days. I didn't have a big enough supply to bottle feed him my milk. But I did still have to pump and dump so I could keep up my supply. Again, double the work of feeding only from the breast.

 

[Celesse]

I love breastfeeding my baby, and nothing will make me stop, or make me supplement with formula or mess with my supply by pumping. But gosh, it's HARD. And when other mommies complain that they couldn't breastfeed and list those reasons, I just want to scream and cry and say yes, it's HARD. For us TOO. Even though we exclusively breastfeed, it's not any easier for us!! We too have cracked bleeding nipples where we have to bite on our teeth not to scream out in pain when baby latches. We too wish that our partner can take a turn at night. We too want a "break". We too need support and understanding and sympathy with the pain and hassle that comes with breastfeeding a newborn. Just because we breastfeed exclusively, doesn't mean it's painless and straightforward and easy for us!!! We're just darn stubborn in our wish to give our baby the absolute best. Just like when we were pregnant.

As someone who has had to supplement both times in order to stop my children from dying (#1 a non latcher, #2 admission to children's ward at 3 days old) I find this paragraph really insulting. I've had to endure all the issues with breastfeeding, and express to maintain a supply and bottle feed my baby. I've spend many nights alone in hospital maintaining a breastfeed/bottle feed/ express routine that took 2.5-3 hours every 4 hours.

You say that exclusive breast feeders are too stubborn and want to give baby the best? A lot of us who have supplemented in the early days have done so to preserve our breastfeeding and allow us nourish our babies whilst other issues are resolved. We are so stubborn that even when we are told to give up and use a bottle as baby won't latch we carry on trying. And when we are told our baby is loosing weight cos they have been unwell and are too weak to take enough from the breast and our supply needs time to increase we get out our breast pump and keep on trying. But until those issues are sorted we need to feed our babies!! Those of us that supplement are stubborn too.

A lot of us would be exclusive breast feeders but fate dealt us a different hand.

 

[ChesMik4eva]

I found this post helpful, because while I had heard breastfeeding was hard I didn't truly believe it. I expected it to breezy and just chuck baby on boob wherever whenever with no dramas because when you see a mum feeding on public that's how it looks! What you don't see is that baby is 5-6 months old and feeding is already well established.

The first few weeks are HARD. And no one really talks about it so this gave me hope to hear it gets easier and won't always be like this. I was feeling pretty alone as we are still figuring it out together and I'm not too comfortable venturing out to feed him in public yet so I stay home a lot. Its nice to hear we almost all go through these struggles and that's what I took from this post.

 

[CarliCareBear]

she warned everybody in the title didnt she? if you dont ebf, then move on as to not be offended! it was just a vent, a kind of humorous one, about bf, not a dig at people who choose to pump or supliment. at least thats how i read it!

This is not attacking anyone but out of curiosity. If you supplement with a few bottles of expressed breast milk a day (or even one) then you are not considered to be exclusively breastfeeding? I have never heard this before.

That's where I got confused. I felt like I was being told I don't breastfeed. Or at least not breastfeed as good as someone else.

I always understood exclusively breasfeeding to be boobs only, no bottles, not even expressed breastmilk. The order of "best to worst" is boob, expressed breastmilk, donor milk, then formula; because there is an order to the type of milk that comes out as you breastfeed, if you mix the hind milk and the fore milk in the bottle, you could cause digestive issues so to be the best mommy you can be (tongue in cheek), breast only is the top of the line.

i was always under the impression "exclusively breastfed" referred to a child getting 100% breastmilk 100% of the time? at least in the US this is how i have heard it defined by many other mothers as well as my own doctor.

also your "best to worst" scale is far too relative (not to mention offensive) as many mothers turn to alternatives to the breast purely for health reasons and to also preserve breastfeeding, therefore making them "the best mommy" they can be by supplementing. common now!

 

[Dk1234]

Yeah I mean to say that people who offer only the breast are the ones stubborn enough to do what is best for their baby is just not considering all scenarios. If someone has a naturally low supply pumping is what is best. For someone who has to have an emergency surgery, supplementing with formula for a few days is best. It just isn't fair to assume "EBF'ers" are the only one stubborn enough to do what's right. I'm gonna stop now because I truly hope it wasn't your intent to make people
Feel less than you. Just hope you've been made more aware of how you worded things.

 

[Jaylynne]

I dunno... I've got mixed feelings about this thread.

One one hand, I get what you're saying. Truly! I've experienced the cracked nipples, milk dripping down while he's trying to latch and being up all hours. And to be honest, I'm jealous that you can breastfeed straight from the breast. I wasn't dealt that hand and I tried hard to see if we could get there but it didn't happen.

On the other hand, I'm not bitching about being exclusive pumping. It's a choice I made because I saw it as being the best option for LO given the circumstances. What I do find offensive even though I try to see it from your point of view, is that some say pumping isn't exclusively breastfeeding. To me, it's the same as the thread where someone said having a c section isn't giving birth. I'm giving milk- from my breasts- to my child. No formula, no top ups. Just breast milk. So how can that NOT be exclusively breast fed? Seriously. I have no clue. Sounds like semantics to me.

As far as hard work, pumping blows donkey balls. Like you really can't compare the effort of direct breastfeeding and pumping. So I guess thats what got my goat. I would love to put him to breast and call it a feed. But I have to clean the parts, pump for at least 20-35minutes, feed him for another 20 minutes, clean the parts or put the extra in the fridge, pray my milk supply doesn't dwindle, pump at least 6x a day... Worry about bringing extra food or pump if out for the day... So yeah... That's at least 3-4 hours a day extra just to give baby something somebody thinks is second best on a stupid f you hierarchy.

Maybe I just don't like to be excluded from threads or have someone tell me I might be offended because I don't belong