Breastfeeding is HARD (only for exclusively breastfeeding mommies)

[meli1981]

i really dont think it was intended to cause a debate between formula feeders and breast feeders. (or suplimenters etc) i dont believe the op had any malicious intent herr, just a humorous insight

 

[Liesje]

she warned everybody in the title didnt she? if you dont ebf, then move on as to not be offended! it was just a vent, a kind of humorous one, about bf, not a dig at people who choose to pump or supliment. at least thats how i read it!

This is not attacking anyone but out of curiosity. If you supplement with a few bottles of expressed breast milk a day (or even one) then you are not considered to be exclusively breastfeeding? I have never heard this before.

That's where I got confused. I felt like I was being told I don't breastfeed. Or at least not breastfeed as good as someone else.

I always understood exclusively breasfeeding to be boobs only, no bottles, not even expressed breastmilk. The order of "best to worst" is boob, expressed breastmilk, donor milk, then formula; because there is an order to the type of milk that comes out as you breastfeed, if you mix the hind milk and the fore milk in the bottle, you could cause digestive issues so to be the best mommy you can be (tongue in cheek), breast only is the top of the line.

i was always under the impression "exclusively breastfed" referred to a child getting 100% breastmilk 100% of the time? at least in the US this is how i have heard it defined by many other mothers as well as my own doctor.

also your "best to worst" scale is far too relative (not to mention offensive) as many mothers turn to alternatives to the breast purely for health reasons and to also preserve breastfeeding, therefore making them "the best mommy" they can be by supplementing. common now!

I was being facetious, just like I said in the post.

 

[staralfur]

Jaylynne (and the rest of the exclusive pumpers on here) you're amazing! I for sure would not have what it takes to do it, so I think you're all superwomen.

 

[Dk1234]

i really dont think it was intended to cause a debate between formula feeders and breast feeders. (or suplimenters etc) i dont believe the op had any malicious intent herr, just a humorous insight

My son can't even tolerate formula. This is what gets me. Because I pump and give an occassional bottle of ebm i am considered a formula feeder???? Not fair.

 

[punkrockmama]

we had a reallly rough start with breastfeeding...we're starting to get a little better but there were times i wanted to rush to the store and grab formula but I didn't and I'm glad I didn't but that's just my own personal choice...my friend switched to formula (her baby was born shortly after mine) because she just couldn't do it anymore but that's okay...her little one is healthy too and that was a good choice for her!! thumbs up too all the diaper changing, feeding (breast or formula), spit up stained, baby on the hip wearing moms out there! being a mom to a baby is not easy! however you choose to feed

 

[meli1981]

i really dont think it was intended to cause a debate between formula feeders and breast feeders. (or suplimenters etc) i dont believe the op had any malicious intent herr, just a humorous insight

My son can't even tolerate formula. This is what gets me. Because I pump and give an occassional bottle of ebm i am considered a formula feeder???? Not fair.

i never said that! why woyld i consider you a formula feeder? where in here did i say that?

 

[Dk1234]

i really dont think it was intended to cause a debate between formula feeders and breast feeders. (or suplimenters etc) i dont believe the op had any malicious intent herr, just a humorous insight

My son can't even tolerate formula. This is what gets me. Because I pump and give an occassional bottle of ebm i am considered a formula feeder???? Not fair.

i never said that! why woyld i consider you a formula feeder? where in here did i say that?

You said she didn't mean to create a debate between formula feeders and breastfeeders. I don't think anyone debating is a formula feeder.

 

[meli1981]

i really dont think it was intended to cause a debate between formula feeders and breast feeders. (or suplimenters etc) i dont believe the op had any malicious intent herr, just a humorous insight

My son can't even tolerate formula. This is what gets me. Because I pump and give an occassional bottle of ebm i am considered a formula feeder???? Not fair.

i never said that! why woyld i consider you a formula feeder? where in here did i say that?

You said she didn't mean to create a debate between formula feeders and breastfeeders. I don't think anyone debating is a formula feeder.

im sorry if i was misunderstood i didnt read through all the posts, and didnt realize it was mostly about ebf and giving expressed milk (which i consider still breast feeding!). i was just trying to say that i dont think she meant to start a debate

 

[pinklightbulb]

Another BF thread hijacked by the "we're offended" crew. Siiiiiiiiiiiigh. Why is it that people go looking for offense? I don't understand. This thread has clearly stated what it is about. Why, why, WHY come in and be offended when it's clear that this thread is not about you?

The BF section is constantly getting hijacked and we can't even write about EBF now without it being bloody offensive to someone. Like it or not... there are those of us out there that EBF. Yet it's seen as some sort of offense to women that couldn't/had no choice. To be blunt, that isn't my problem. I'm very sorry for each and every one of the women this applies to. But please STOP acting like all EBF are just out to offend you every time the words "BF" come up... even in the BF section.

I know I will probably get an infraction for this post. But I've been here quite a while now and through BFing two kids and this section keeps getting worse imo. I just do not understand why it is so hard to not respond to a thread that doesn't apply to you? How hard could it be? Surely people get bored of looking for offense... but from all the chaos that regularly goes on in this section, obviously not.

Sorry OP. Had to get it out. It's been doing my nut in since I BF my first kid.

 

[Gunnhilde]

I dunno... I've got mixed feelings about this thread.

One one hand, I get what you're saying. Truly! I've experienced the cracked nipples, milk dripping down while he's trying to latch and being up all hours. And to be honest, I'm jealous that you can breastfeed straight from the breast. I wasn't dealt that hand and I tried hard to see if we could get there but it didn't happen.

On the other hand, I'm not bitching about being exclusive pumping. It's a choice I made because I saw it as being the best option for LO given the circumstances. What I do find offensive even though I try to see it from your point of view, is that some say pumping isn't exclusively breastfeeding. To me, it's the same as the thread where someone said having a c section isn't giving birth. I'm giving milk- from my breasts- to my child. No formula, no top ups. Just breast milk. So how can that NOT be exclusively breast fed? Seriously. I have no clue. Sounds like semantics to me.

As far as hard work, pumping blows donkey balls. Like you really can't compare the effort of direct breastfeeding and pumping. So I guess thats what got my goat. I would love to put him to breast and call it a feed. But I have to clean the parts, pump for at least 20-35minutes, feed him for another 20 minutes, clean the parts or put the extra in the fridge, pray my milk supply doesn't dwindle, pump at least 6x a day... Worry about bringing extra food or pump if out for the day... So yeah... That's at least 3-4 hours a day extra just to give baby something somebody thinks is second best on a stupid f you hierarchy.

Maybe I just don't like to be excluded from threads or have someone tell me I might be offended because I don't belong

OMG not just the milk leaking down...but mine used to spray when I took my bra off.

I tried the pumping when I was in school and it was just about the most annoying, PITA experience of my life. I FF, BF from the breast, and pumped. I can't tell you how quickly I would have traded that in for the ease of exclusively and directly BF. Every time after feeding, I'd have to go and make a massive bottle on top of it (all the women in my mother's family have documented supply issues). She ate almost constantly during all waking times (except 45 minutes of sleep here and there). That was really magical, especially for a single mother.

 

[vintagecat]

Another BF thread hijacked by the "we're offended" crew. Siiiiiiiiiiiigh. Why is it that people go looking for offense? I don't understand. This thread has clearly stated what it is about. Why, why, WHY come in and be offended when it's clear that this thread is not about you?

The BF section is constantly getting hijacked and we can't even write about EBF now without it being bloody offensive to someone. Like it or not... there are those of us out there that EBF. Yet it's seen as some sort of offense to women that couldn't/had no choice. To be blunt, that isn't my problem. I'm very sorry for each and every one of the women this applies to. But please STOP acting like all EBF are just out to offend you every time the words "BF" come up... even in the BF section.

I know I will probably get an infraction for this post. But I've been here quite a while now and through BFing two kids and this section keeps getting worse imo. I just do not understand why it is so hard to not respond to a thread that doesn't apply to you? How hard could it be? Surely people get bored of looking for offense... but from all the chaos that regularly goes on in this section, obviously not.

Sorry OP. Had to get it out. It's been doing my nut in since I BF my first kid.

AMEN!

I truly don't think the OP was trying to offend anyone either. She has been polite through the entire thread and definitely doesn't deserve any backlash.

I was forced to pump the first few days at the clinic because they wanted to see how much milk I was producing. Having done my research on breastfeeding, I knew it wasn't the best way to know how much milk you make. The baby is always best at getting the milk out! So I pumped for nearly a week every two hours, even throughout the night, while recovering from a natural birth with no pain relief. I didn't even have any pain relievers for my episiotomy. Pumping was PAINFUL as hell and I found it incredibly inconvenient. I didn't like having to use bottles at all because my daughter would suck down so much air and have difficulty burping afterwards. If you can pump and it works for you, I think that's great, but I found it to be far too stressful! Breast milk is better than no milk at all!

 

[Jaylynne]

Another BF thread hijacked by the "we're offended" crew. Siiiiiiiiiiiigh. Why is it that people go looking for offense? I don't understand. This thread has clearly stated what it is about. Why, why, WHY come in and be offended when it's clear that this thread is not about you?

The BF section is constantly getting hijacked and we can't even write about EBF now without it being bloody offensive to someone. Like it or not... there are those of us out there that EBF. Yet it's seen as some sort of offense to women that couldn't/had no choice. To be blunt, that isn't my problem. I'm very sorry for each and every one of the women this applies to. But please STOP acting like all EBF are just out to offend you every time the words "BF" come up... even in the BF section.

I know I will probably get an infraction for this post. But I've been here quite a while now and through BFing two kids and this section keeps getting worse imo. I just do not understand why it is so hard to not respond to a thread that doesn't apply to you? How hard could it be? Surely people get bored of looking for offense... but from all the chaos that regularly goes on in this section, obviously not.

Sorry OP. Had to get it out. It's been doing my nut in since I BF my first kid.

Probably because the thread title states only for exclusive breastfeeding mommies then goes and excludes women who exclusively pump who by the way are exclusively breastfeeding. should we have a vent thread on how we don't really belong in any category and get flack from both sides? How we get nagged as second best? Why should we be excluded? If we had a thread on that it would go down the same as this one. We all breastfeed so who gives a shit how it gets to their mouths. Most things worthwhile take sacrifice.

Honestly if the title and first paragraph was omitted there wouldn't be a fuss.

 

[Dk1234]

Another BF thread hijacked by the "we're offended" crew. Siiiiiiiiiiiigh. Why is it that people go looking for offense? I don't understand. This thread has clearly stated what it is about. Why, why, WHY come in and be offended when it's clear that this thread is not about you?

The BF section is constantly getting hijacked and we can't even write about EBF now without it being bloody offensive to someone. Like it or not... there are those of us out there that EBF. Yet it's seen as some sort of offense to women that couldn't/had no choice. To be blunt, that isn't my problem. I'm very sorry for each and every one of the women this applies to. But please STOP acting like all EBF are just out to offend you every time the words "BF" come up... even in the BF section.

I know I will probably get an infraction for this post. But I've been here quite a while now and through BFing two kids and this section keeps getting worse imo. I just do not understand why it is so hard to not respond to a thread that doesn't apply to you? How hard could it be? Surely people get bored of looking for offense... but from all the chaos that regularly goes on in this section, obviously not.

Sorry OP. Had to get it out. It's been doing my nut in since I BF my first kid.

What a rude post. I came to this thread becaus I don't know I was gonna be excluded because I give a bottle of expressed milk a few times a week when I go out. Didn't know I wasnt exclusively breastfeeding my child even though all he gets is breast milk. (nothing against those who supplement I did day 2 and 3 before my milk came in)

 

[pinklightbulb]

More cases of seeking offense Is there an EE thread? I don't know. It doesn't apply to me. So I don't go looking for them.

Perhaps it's offensive to ME to have this section overrun with "offended" mums all the freaking time. Nobody stopped anyone making EE threads or combi-feeding threads or asking for help with FF-ing threads.

Why can't EBF have their own thread?

It boggles my mind.

 

[Dk1234]

More cases of seeking offense Is there an EE thread? I don't know. It doesn't apply to me. So I don't go looking for them.

Perhaps it's offensive to ME to have this section overrun with "offended" mums all the freaking time. Nobody stopped anyone making EE threads or combi-feeding threads or asking for help with FF-ing threads.

Why can't EBF have their own thread?

It boggles my mind.

Um I don't combi feed, I don't exclusively express and I don't supplement so excuse me for not realizing thT I wasn't breastfeeding because I give the odd bottle of ebm. Maybe I might seem like I'm looking for offense but you sure look like you are willing to dish it out.



And th title is breastfeeding is hard. I would think that would apply to anyone who is breatfeeding which I don't give a crap what your definition is, refers to anyone giving their baby breastmilk .

 

[Jaylynne]

BECAUSE WE ARE EXCLUSIVE BREASTFED. I don't have problems with the OP other than her wording things in a way she probably didn't mean. I do have problems with people trying to insinuate and discriminate the types of BREASTFEEDING their babies.

Good grief. We arent saying the OP can't find it hard. I would be the first to do the hugs emoticon if I didn't feel as if how dare I read this thread because I'm not feeding directly from a nipple.

 

[jenniferttc1]

Have not read all the replies......but I would think being a dedicated pumper would be very hard. Of course the early days are hard and I think we all sometimes wanna scream to another person that we felt the same pain and exhaustion they did while they list those reasons as quitting as if those who sucessfully gf had it easy from the start. But I'm even kind of offended by the post. My son is 6 1/2 months now and I breastfeed only till recently. It's much easier to feed now, but I have no choice. My college classes started back up and I can get any milk out with a pump, so Tuesday and thursdays he get 1 bottle of formula at 4pm so I can get my degree and a better example for my son. 2 bottles a week after 6 months should not make me less dedicated. And I plan to nurse for 6 more months or even longer. I just have to do what I have to do

 

[pinklightbulb]

DK: No. I'm not. I don't know what you do. If you EBF, great. If you EBF and pump part-time, that's great too. If you FF, great. I don't care. I care about people looking for reasons to apparently feel excluded when the thread has warned them to look away now if it doesn't apply to them to avoid exactly what has happened here.

Everyone/anyone else: None of you ladies are dense. This thread was obviously meant for women that BF their babies straight from the breast, and who would like to vent about issues relating to that. Why, tell me, please, why is that so wrong? What is offensive about it? I truly don't understand why EBF and its own related issues can't be discussed in a single thread meant for it. There was nothing offensive in the OP... nothing at all.

 

[LegoHouse]

Oh guys, can't we just lighten up? She clearly wanted to know there were other bf'ing mums finding it hard, too.

 

[Dk1234]

Well the pain and annoyance of thrush is worse than cracked, bleeding nipples and bad latch so maybe I'll start a thread that says if you don't have thrush and are currently battling though it you arent breatfeeding and trying to give your baby the best. Please!!!!! The thread is bothersome clbecause it is exclusive and down right simple minded to think that only people who only offer the boob care enough to give their baby the best.