Breastfeeding question after baby dies

Discussion in 'Miscarriage Support' started by hayley x, Apr 8, 2009.

  1. hayley x

    hayley x 1AngelSon,1EarthDaughter

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    I really need some help. My poor baby died yesterday and he was breastfed. Obviously as he hasnt been feeding from me for more than 24 hours my boobs are full as anything and so painful, I dont know what to do. I dont want to express cause then my milk will keep coming through and theres no need for it any more but they just hurt so much I dont know what to do with them, please can someone help? xxx
     
  2. Halle71

    Halle71 Pregnant with number 2!

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    Hayley, I couldn't possibly read this and not write anything even though I can't answer your question.
    I am so, so, so sorry for your loss and my thoughts are with you and your family.

    Perhaps you could call your midwife re breasts but I suspect that the answer may be to wait until the milk dries up which should not be too long due to the short amount of time you breastfed. I hope you get more comfortable quickly.

    Take care sweetie.

    Hx
     
  3. clairebear

    clairebear Mummy to 2 handsome boys.

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    :hugs: im sorry for your loss honey

    I know a lot of girls reccomend cabbage leaves and put them in the freezer. Take Painkillers to i think i read somewhere a tight fitting bra helps and try not to touch your nipples at all x x
     
  4. sukisam

    sukisam Well-Known Member

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    Hayley,

    I'm so sorry you're baby died sending you lots of :hug:. My first baby was born sleeping at 24 weeks so I never fed her, but my milk went pretty quicky, I just wore pads, don't express because as you say you'll just produce more milk.
    Call you midwife, I expect she'll be to see you today + probably your GP. There are tablets but my GP felt they were a bit didgy so didn't prescribe, it is painful but the milk will stop.
    Please make sure you get lots of support, I found SANDS (stillborn + neotnatal death soc) absolutely vital for the first 6-12 months.

    If I can help let me know, I'll send you my e-mail address if it'll help in anyway.

    Thinking of you
    xxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxx
     
  5. lillysmum

    lillysmum Mum of 2 cheeky monkeys

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    i'm very sorry for your loss,

    as you said if you express it will still come in however breasts require a baby to latch in order to keep producing milk (try as they might breast pump companies will never be able to replicate a babies latch) so you could express maybe 60mls /2oz from each breast to make yourself feel more comfortable - it will just take a bit longer for the milk to dry up completely......either that or if you can tolerate the tenderness for a day or so that will be it.
     
  6. Chilli

    Chilli Very lucky Mum of 2 girls

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    Oh Hayley, I'm so sorry you ever had to ask this question. I'm sure that there is something that GP can give you to curb the production of milk, please call and find out. Midwives should also know. O don't think pumping is the answer aa although will relieve the pain, the problem will continue. I hope you can find the help you deserve soon:hugs:
     
  7. Jkelmum

    Jkelmum Well-Known Member

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    :hugs: Talk to your gp they can give you somthing to dry them up faster ..so sorry you have to go thru this
    hugs serina x
     
  8. emzlouize

    emzlouize mum 2 Aidan & Angel Mason

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    im so sorry for ur loss sweetie, i think the midwive or doc can give you some tabs to dry ur milk up, :hugs: xx
     
  9. dan-o

    dan-o RMC's but mum to 3 now!

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    Sending you :hug: at this difficult time, I'm so deeply sorry for your loss :hugs:
     
  10. mummymadness

    mummymadness Mummy to 4

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    Iam so truely sorry for your loss and pain, I cannot even beginn to imagine **Hugs**.

    I have heard Epsom salts dry milk up very quickly.

    xxxxxxxxx
     
  11. natasja32

    natasja32 Mum to 4 boys

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    Hi sweetie...
    Im so sorry to hear about your loss.....After i lost Bodhi,i had the same prob with my breasts. I did go and see my GP,but she said that there is a tablet but the side effects are quit bad so she didnt want to prescribe them(its an old drug and doesnt get used anymore). I was just told to express a little bit to releave the discomfort and take painkillers. My mw did recommend taking a savoy cabbage and putting it in the fridge. Once they cold you should coup your breast with them and that does help. Have no idea why.....It worked for me. Should only be a few days hunny and your breasts should be feeling better. Sorry i wasnt much help,just thought id pass it on as it seemed to have worked for me. Thinking of you sweetie,and if you ever need to(or when you ready)talk,im here. Just send me a PM.:hugs::hugs:
     
  12. DiddyDons

    DiddyDons Guest

    I agree with Natasja! There is a tablet you can take to stop it comig through!

    When i lost Sophie..I wasnt offered this and I had full breasts for about 2weeks...they were so sore and so heavy and worst of all there was no baby for me to feed :cry:

    Im also here if you ever feel like talking to someone who understands! Im thinkingof you and I am so sorry :cry:

    Huge :hugs: to you and floaty kisses to Alex! xxxx

    Donna xxx

    ♥Proud Mummy To Sophie, An Angel Born Perfectly
    Into Heaven! 31.01.08 ♥ :cry:

    ♥Sophie's Website♥
    [​IMG]
    [​IMG][​IMG]
    ♥Fell Pregnant With Sophie After Not Having AF for TWO Years..She's My Perfect Miracle! Diagnosed With PCOS Dec 08. Just Started Metformin-Hoping For Regular AF's
    ♥
     
  13. Naya69

    Naya69 Well-Known Member

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    i cant possible read and run and not say anything i cant imagin what your going through i have no answers all i can say is i bf my boy for a couple of days then stoped my boobs went very hard and sore but after a week they were fine but iam sending you and your family lots and hugs at this very sad time xxx
     
  14. Gabrielle

    Gabrielle Mum of 2! Pg with # 3!

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    Haley I'm So very sorry for your loss. Alex and your family are in our prayers. God bless


    Regarding your breasts. If you use cabbage leaves and put them in the fridge and put them on your breasts for about 10mins every 2hours it will help with the pain and swelling. Also you could wrap your breasts with an ace banage.....it hurts like crap but helps them go down alot.
    You should only have this pain for 24-48 hours I would think. Just try not to let ANY milk out and they will dry up.
    Overhere i don't believe they give anything out to dry them up..but you could call and ask.

    My experince I tried to breastfeed my babies but they were in the NICU so long and all i could do is pump so didn't succeed so what i did was just wore a tight bra and by the next 24hours they were much better. You will want to wear pads of course b/c you may leak for quite sometime.

    Again I'm so sorry this has happened to you and your family..........Do they know why he passed away sweetie...? Don't have to answer if it's to hard....HUGS
     
  15. Aidedhoney

    Aidedhoney Mum of Nats & Alex

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    Didnt want to read and run, so sorry for your loss your in my thoughts xxxx
     
  16. Csunshine013

    Csunshine013 Well-Known Member

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    Oh dear so sorry for your loss. I know words can not help. I think my friend used cabbage leafs. Hope it helps and God Bless:hug:
     
  17. sam's mum

    sam's mum mum of two gorgeous boys

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    :hug: I'm so sorry to hear about your gorgeous little Alex Hayley :hugs:

    If you're in loads of discomfort before you can get anything from your doctor I agree with what everyone has said about cabbage leaves - they help so much, but make sure you get savoy cabbage, chill it in the fridge and before you put the leaves in your bra score across them with a knife, as this releases enzymes from inside the leaf (which is supposed to help with engorgement) - the cold really helps the pain too.

    Thinking of you lots :hugs: x
     
  18. orange-sox

    orange-sox Sebs Mummy + WTT

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    Just to mirror what everyone else has said, I am so sorry for your loss sweetheart :hugs: :cry:

    I had similar problems after I had Seb and like many others my doctor didn't feel the benefits outweighed the risks associated with the medication she could've prescribed. Savoy Cabbage leaves did help, but the best thing for me was wearing a well fitting bra 24/7, some breast pads, and I took cold and flu capsules (the paracetamol helps with the pain, and the decongestant helps dry your milk up).

    Whenever you're ready to come talk to us, we're all here for you, even if all you want to do is scream and shout, we all understand those feelings all too well.

    Sending lots of love to your whole family, especially yourself + Alex

    Emma xxx
     
  19. MummyToAmberx

    MummyToAmberx Mum to 3 Girls 1 Boy

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    hey.
    sorry hear of your loss
    when my milk came in i couldnt BF it just went away itsself within 5 or so days
     
  20. malpal

    malpal Mummy to 3 girlies!!!

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    :hugs::hugs:

    When i had to stop b-feeding i was told to wear as tight fitting bra as i could get into (i wore my old pre-pregnancy sports bra and that was v tight) and not to have hot showers or baths etc... The pressusre eased after a couple of days. xx

    :hugs::hugs:
     

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