Can't admit to anyone else...

Discussion in 'Gender Disappointment' started by MemmaJ, Oct 29, 2016.

  1. MemmaJ

    MemmaJ Well-Known Member

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    So today I paid the grand sum of $7.99 (whatever that is in £), to submit my scan via the Gender Experts website for Ramzi Theory analysis... just for them to tell me 'boy'.
     
  2. Dannypop

    Dannypop Mom to Danny and Jack

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    Well that theory is laughable rubbish according to my OBGYN so I wouldn't bank on the result. And the money wasn't wasted as you are at least being proactive during the agonizingly helpless wait till the gender reveal scan.

    How many more weeks to go till your scan?
     
  3. MemmaJ

    MemmaJ Well-Known Member

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    To be completely honest, I think they've got it wrong anyway.
    What they have marked as my 'placenta' on their analysis result is actually not my placenta! They've also marked up the picture with 'left' and 'right' as if it's a tilted view, when it's not. It's straight as you look at it.
    I'll try and attach their picture...
    The sonographer confirmed with me where the placenta is on the screen during the scan yesterday, and it was actually confirmed in the same place (on the right of the picture, so on my left) using blood-flow doppler when I had the sneaky scan at work last week. So I'm not taking what they've done as correct, it's just disappointing and if I hadn't seen it for myself on the scan and had it confirmed by a doctor and sonographer, then I'd think they must be right.

    This is their findings:
    https://i12.photobucket.com/albums/a231/mumtotwins/Mobile%20Uploads/IMG_0926_zpsyhqa40kr.jpg



    And I have circled where my placenta actually is. It's not as clear on the picture as it was on the screen, but I still thought you could see it so was surprised with what they said...

    https://i12.photobucket.com/albums/a231/mumtotwins/Mobile%20Uploads/IMG_0928_zpsvq2jaqgc.jpeg
     
  4. MemmaJ

    MemmaJ Well-Known Member

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    NHS scan including gender is 20 weeks, but even private companies won't do gender scans in the U.K. until 16 weeks (I managed to find out the gender at about 15+3 last time by being cheeky..!).

    But you have inspired me to possibly book a general 'reassurance' scan privately at around 13 weeks and just ask to see a 'potty shot'..?! I know they will say 'we can't tell you the gender this early' etc etc, but I wouldn't expect them to - I'd just want to have a look for myself. They don't have to say anything they just have to get the shot/view for me and let me see!
    I don't know if they'd allow it though.. :-(
     
  5. Dannypop

    Dannypop Mom to Danny and Jack

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    I would absolutely go for a 13 week scan and ask for a potty shot. It really will be helpful I think.

    It was so obvious to even my untrained eye that the nub was totally flat. Even from the side view with baby on its back I could clearly see the nub lying parallel with the spine. The doctor was so kind she went into depth explaining how if it was a boy it would be angled up at 35 degrees.

    I am still stumped how in SA they routinely confirm gender at 13 weeks with absolutel confidence and nowhere else in the world ...
     
  6. MemmaJ

    MemmaJ Well-Known Member

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    I know, it's crazy isn't it..! I think they do 13 weeks in The Netherlands too!

    I've found a couple of companies online that conduct fetal DNA sampling (gender testing only, not for chromosomal conditions) using a home blood testing kit they send in the post, from 9 weeks pregnant.
    I guess the analysis process is similar to the Harmony test as they say they separate the fetal DNA in maternal blood...
    Sent the link to my partner and said I want to do it - he asked about their reviews etc, so I started looking into it a bit more and it seems from posts on various forums that they have given incorrect results to some people... argh!
     
  7. 6lilpigs

    6lilpigs Well-Known Member

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    Please save your money, these tests are not accurate keep googling! If they are right 50% of the time and refund the wrong guesses then they are still getting rich! I hate all of them, especially paid gender guessing sites as the best sites are free, ingender, genderdreaming, even here there is a great regular guessing section.
     
  8. 6lilpigs

    6lilpigs Well-Known Member

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    Posted that quickly as my computer keeps crashing ugh!
    Ramzi's is nonsense so please wipe that off your mind:) How far along are you now?? Your best bet is to book a private scan exactly on the 13th week mark, that is the best time to see a nice clear nub before it changes again. You want lots of profile pictures ok :) Both genders have a potrusion at 13 weeks in potty shots so nub is best at this stage.

    Nub lesson This is a good link to a lesson in nubs so you know what to look for, head to our ultrasound guessing section and get practising! I hope this is your little girl for you x
     
  9. MemmaJ

    MemmaJ Well-Known Member

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    By my LMP, I'm 7+6 today - so should have been 7+5 at the private scan yesterday, however they measured me at 7+3 so I don't know which one to go by now when booking further scans...

    Either way I'm still 5-6 weeks away from the next scan :-(
    Hopefully I'll get my NHS one more around the 12 week mark and if I don't get any decent shots then, can book a private one for 13 weeks.

    I don't know, I'm just becoming really fixated on this now and clinging onto every theory and possible test that I can find. I can't wait until 16 weeks :-(
     
  10. Dannypop

    Dannypop Mom to Danny and Jack

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    I completely understand. It seems like an interminable wait but it does go by quickly. And you are at least doing all you can to try find out. That helps too!
     
  11. 6lilpigs

    6lilpigs Well-Known Member

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    Good plan. Have a look through the link on nubs though so you know for your nhs scan what to be keeping an eye out for, or if you can sneakily have your phone camera on in dh's pocket then try and film it as they don't let you film them. Until then don't pay for anything else ok!!:hugs:
     
  12. Jessicahide

    Jessicahide Well-Known Member

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    With mine, my 12 week scans have been very obvious, last year with Andrew i had 100% boy guesses, with Isobel this year all but one guess was girl, i think you should be able to tell then xx
     
  13. MemmaJ

    MemmaJ Well-Known Member

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    Obvious because of the nub, Jessica..?
    I've been researching the nub theory and I think I've got it now..! Even if I don't get a decent shot of it on a picture (although that would be nice), I can look out for it on the screen while they're doing the scan can't I...

    8 weeks today by my LMP. I have my Booking appointment next week and I don't think I'm going to mention the new gestation/date I was given at the private scan, as that might push my 12 week scan back a bit further!
     
  14. MemmaJ

    MemmaJ Well-Known Member

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    I have just emailed the place we have our private scans, and asked if they would allow me to book a gender scan for 15 weeks instead of 16, at our own risk and on the basis that we understand it may not be clear enough.
    That would be at the end of December, so still ages away..!

    I'm hoping they'll allow it if we are willing to take the responsibility onto ourselves that we may not see anything. They told us the gender at 15+1 last time during a general reassurance scan (very clear!), so I'm sure it would be fine - it's just wether their policy will allow us to even book it..!
     
  15. Jessicahide

    Jessicahide Well-Known Member

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    Ds nub was very obvious but he also he had a really square head.
     
  16. Dannypop

    Dannypop Mom to Danny and Jack

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    They should for sure be able to let you have a look -it's not like you can do anything to them if they get it wrong.

    The waiting is a killer so I completely understand how you just cannot bear to wait past December. I found I was only wishing the weeks away so I could get to 13 weeks, not to start feeling better from all the nausea, but so I could find out the gender!!!

    Even though my scan was very clear I am still waiting till my scan at 17 weeks for absolute confirmation. So no buying clothes just yet -although I did have a squizz and found myself drawn to the gender neutral and boys clothing! My mind just can't do pink -this poor little one is going to be dressed like her brothers!
     
  17. Jessicahide

    Jessicahide Well-Known Member

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    I will update you with both scan pics next week xxx
     
  18. MemmaJ

    MemmaJ Well-Known Member

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    That's exactly it Dannypops - I can't think about anything else.
    I only remembered yesterday that I have my Booking appointment today because I'm just so focused on when/how to find out the gender ASAP and no other appointments or anything.

    The private scanning place have allowed me to book a scan on my birthday at the end of December when I'll be 15+1, on the understanding that we won't get the usual 'free re-scan' they offer if they can't tell... 15+1 is when we found out the last one was a boy and it was very clear, so I'm fairly confident it should be fine.
    Ideally I'd have it even sooner than that because that's still too far away for my liking and I'm sure we could tell sooner. I was going to try for 14 weeks - but I think that would have been pushing it and they'd have just said no!

    So for now I'll just have to settle for aiming for the 12 week scan and looking for the Nub on that instead.
    My midwife should send the scan request after our appointment today. I'm 9 weeks today by LMP (I'm ignoring the fact I was put back 2 days by my 7 week scan!) - so I'm hoping it won't be too long until I have a date for it.

    Yes would love to see your scans when you can Jessica :)
     
  19. Dannypop

    Dannypop Mom to Danny and Jack

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    Oh Memma I know exactly what you are going through. Now that I know my baby's gender I don't care if I am 14 weeks or 40 weeks. Obviously I will always worry that baby is healthy, but I am good to carry on with normal life now. EVERYTHING was on pause while I waited to find out.

    Ask them if they can try for a potty shot. That's usually the best way of getting a view.

    OK, so 6 more weeks to go -just break it down week by week and plan something fun each week to spoil yourself (as bloody naff and cheesy as that sounds) that you can see as a mini-milestone for getting closer to the scan day. And you've got the 12 week scan as a big treat in there too -my doc was able to see boy at 11ish weeks with DS2 but obviously wouldn't tell me. He slipped out a "he" so I knew! So 12 weeks should be good for a peek.

    I am still not ready to celebrate just yet -I want to wait for my 17 week scan in just under 3 weeks time.

    It's so weird cause when the doctor said, "You can see it's totally flat so it's definitely a girl" I thought I would scream with joy but I was so shocked it didn't register. I was SO aware of DH's sensitivity toward my potential disappointment that I felt if I showed too much exhilaration he would know what my opposite reaction would have been. The doctor was probably like, "Huh? They've got 2 boys and they seem totally unconcerned that they are now having a girl"

    I can't wait for 3 weeks time when I will know for absolute certain and I can then go shopping with my mom!

    Keep us posted on everything you are going through. Writing it out and having people respond passes the time.
     
  20. MemmaJ

    MemmaJ Well-Known Member

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    I know they won't show me anything at the 12 week scan, so all I'll have to go off will be the Nub if I manage to see it.
    That should be in 3-4 weeks time and then yes - exactly 6 weeks today until the private gender scan..! They will definitely do a potty shot there.

    I'm really struggling with nausea and exhaustion (have been since 5 weeks) and am having a mental debate with myself about whether to take some time off work. I know I could really do with it (my 1 year old doesn't sleep at night either which makes it so much worse), but I know that would probably make the weeks go even slower if I'm not at work.. :-/

    Funny you say that about your reaction as I often wonder how I will react if they do tell me it's a girl..!
    Now, I can picture myself crying with joy - but actually I think in the heat of the moment I may just feel pure shock like you..! Maybe even not believe them!
    God knows how I'll react if they tell me it's another boy though... :-(
     

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