{CLOSED GROUP} Journey to BFP and Beyond!

[jlw617]

Yes Terissa, please do!

Katie, I usually get my hair done about 2-3 times a year, I'm not super high maintenance either, but I don't like to when I'm pregnant since they don't know the full effects yet of getting your hair colored while pregnant plus I'm not sure all those fumes from perms and other things are too entirely good for you either!

You should totally start testing on wed! I told myself I was going to wait until a certain day to test especially because I only had one test left and it was a digi, well I was pleasantly surprised even though I tested early!

Afm- some of my symptoms seem to be fading but I'm not going to let it bother me as yesterday I got to see and hear the little beans hb!

 

[NDH]

I haven't had my hair done since October 2010 LOL (and even then it was only cut) I did take scissors to t myself yesterday though as it was looking quite uneven due to Chloe being a hair puller.

I'm going to the Dr on Monday for bloodwork and a scan. Had a negative FRER and IC yesterday and another negative FRER diluted 1:3 (approximately) so not sure if it's hook effect or if I lost the baby, but hcg still shouldn't be zero if so.

 

[jlw617]

Oh no Natalie, you will be in my prayers!

 

[KTJ006]

Natalie - keeping you in my thoughts Sorry if I'm dense, but what is a hook effect? And an IC? Will pray the doctors visit goes well on Monday! Try to enjoy the rest of your weekend

 

[kdmalk]

Natalie, I bet it is just hook effect by this point. Will be thinking of you.

Kate, hook effect is when your levels get so high that the test can't process your HCG. It causes some sort of sandwich that makes the test appear to be negative. Happens as early as 8ish weeks. IC is an Internet cheapie test.

AF finally got me just now. Finally time to move on!

 

[KTJ006]

Jamie - I forgot to congratulate you in a good scan! What a relief! Any pics to share?

Kylee - makes sense. Thanks for the explanation! Sorry about AF but at least you can start fresh!!

 

[KTJ006]

I just do not have a good feeling about testing I'm so tired of disappointment

 

[jlw617]

I'm sorry Kylee, are you going to take a break for now or do the NTNP method?

Katie-sorry you're feeling that way, I dont think i ever felt good about testing though.
Here's my scan pic, not much to it lol. You can see a larger pic if you click on it

 

[NDH]

Waiting on results of bloodwork. Please please please be in normal range (25,000-290,000 for 9-12 weeks)
Couldn't get a scan today but I have one booked for 10:30 tomorrow morning.

 

[KTJ006]

Fingers crossed, Natalie!!!

 

[Fleur828815]

Natalie, I’ve got everything crossed that there’s a healthy baby in there and that you’re worried for nothing I’ve also read that at some point pregnancy tests stop showing up as positive. Will be thinking of you, please update as soon as you can. Thanks for the advice about the Doppler, I think I’ll just refrain from buying one.

Katie, sorry you’re feeling that way, it’s tough to go through the disappointment month after month. Maybe try holding out as long as possible before testing? Do you like your new hair cut? I also tell DH he’s lucky I’m so low maintenance.

Terrissa, have you started filling in your pregnancy journal? I’ve ordered mine but it’s being delivered from France so I won’t get it before 2 weeks. I’m too paranoid to start writing in it before the end of the first trimester anyway.

Jamie, congrats on the scan!

Kylee, hope you’ll get better luck this month.

AFM : either there is something wrong again, or I’m having the easiest first trimester ever. Most of the time I don’t even remember I’m pregnant, I think it’s better this way, I won’t get too attached.

 

[tcinks]

Oh Natalie, I read your posts in your other journal I'm so sorry you're going through this again . I hope you get some answers.

 

[jlw617]

Hi Fleur-when do you have a scan? I have been really sick some days but other days I feel the same, I pretty much forget I'm pregnant but overall this has been a much easier pregnancy than I've had with my girls.

Natalie- I don't know how many hours difference there are between us but please update as soon as you can! Praying for you!

 

[tcinks]

Oh fleur, yes I started writing in my journal! so glad I got it.

It was kind of a sad weekend. I mean, it was good, dh and I spent lots of time with family. But his sister was in town so of course it was just all the ooohs and ahhhs over him. It hit dh really hard as he was playing with he nephew that he should be playing with his own son.

 

[Fleur828815]

Natalie, just read Terrissa's message, I'm so sorry that things aren't going well, what a nightmare We're here for you if you need to talk.

Jamie, I'm going in for a scan next week, I'll be just over 10 weeks. Hope your pregnancy continues to go smoothly for you!

Terrissa, I know people expect us to get over a miscarriage once another baby is on the way but your baby will always be your baby. Your DH sounds like a very sensitive guy, it's so sad that he had to go through that but I hope that the new baby will help to heal both of you.

 

[KTJ006]

Oh Natalie....I am so sorry. I don't know what else to say other than we are here for you!!

No BFP this month. I've started spotting which means AF is a few days away. I'll likely not be on BNB as much from this point on. Not sure what the future holds but this continuing to "try" and always being disappointed is just too much. Going to continue to enjoy my kiddos and not focus on this anymore. Pretty sure God is telling me to just stop and enjoy what I have. Best to you ladies! I will check in every once in a while...

 

[NDH]

For those who don't know, blood test was negative

I still have an ultrasound today which I hope will give me some answers.

 

[kdmalk]

Jamie... I think we will keep trying. As embarrassing as it is, we honestly don't dtd unless we are ttc. So for us, NTNP is "Kylee won't have a baby unless it is divine conception." So we really have to keep "trying" for there to be a chance at all.

I really had a rough week last week before AF arrived and was feeling very down. I was also just feeling plain crazy because my body has been so different since the second loss. I can't interpret anything anymore and it just leaves me feeling like a psych patient when I analyze my symptoms and then stare at blank pregnancy tests over and over again throughout the day. At one point I was 100% convinced we should just put a stop to this and leave the baby thing behind for a while. Then I was convinced we should just start the adoption process because I didn't want to go through the worry of being pregnant. Then I convinced myself that we should keep trying because it is hard to watch all of my closest friends who are currently pregnant. I was 100% sure of each of these things at one point or another. I cried on Thursday and then took a vacation day on Friday just to get myself together again. This whole baby thing has got me out of sorts! It makes sense to stop, but I know in my heart that I will be just as anxious about not trying as I will be about ttc, so I just feel like I can't win.

Several friends have suggested that I start journaling. I'm not really sure how to go about that.... I try to AVOID feelings, so writing them down seems pretty scary to me. I have a journal already that was purchased in September when we started ttc, but I only wrote in it once before I got my bfp. Now I am not sure exactly how I feel about a journal because I am terrified to get pregnant again and then have to write myself through another loss.

I just don't know what to do anymore.

....sorry for all the feelings.

 

[kdmalk]

Nat, wrote on your other page, but hoping your ultrasound gives you some clearer answers.

 

[NDH]

Well the ultrasound revealed a completely empty uterus

I'm not sure whether I feel grateful for being spared another physical miscarriage, or angry that my body robbed me of the chance of getting any closure Sometimes the baby gets completely reabsorbed I guess...