Catalyst
Mother of 1 & TTC#2
- Joined
- Sep 28, 2008
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Hello, Im 30, married and have two beautiful boys age 5 and 2 (born july 2009 and january 2012).
I am studying at University, just started my third year and my education takes 5 years. By then I will have B.ed degree and M.ed degree and have licence to teach teenagers at primary school.
Now then, litle background story over and to the point!
It is funny that when talking about having kids my DH wanted 3 and I 2. When DS#1 was born my DH said shortly after lets have another. It was to early for my point of wiev but not long after that we decited to start TTC and got pg in first try. DS#1 was just 2,5 years old when DS#2 was born. So it has been loads to do, some times hard having two boys, short age gap and boys that have loads of energy. The younger is also so I dont know the english word. Well he thinks he is bigger than he is so he tends to do things by his own, he just wonders off and doesnt look back, just walks away if he feels like it if he sees something interesting or wants to go somewhere. He opens the fridge, kitchen kabinets and so on if he is hungry (he does not ask me first, just goes and gets something) he even takes a chair and pulls it to the counter, climbs up, opens the high kitchen kabinets and search there for something nice (candy sometimes or biscits) and I am always telling him off about it and fearing he will fall down. So you see, he is headstrong, goes his ways and does not take directions well. There is hovever no tantrums or nothing like that but the other thing can piss you off alot.
So they can be handful but when meeting my SIL boys at the same age we feel ours are angels. But because of that, DH feels having kids is so mutch work, he loves them dearly and plays alot with them but some aspects he does not like, like puting them in bed, he does it but not loves it.
A year ago I felt like not having more kids but didnt close the window on it that maby later, maby after my education. But Dh was like no more babys. But when I ask if he wouldnt then get you know what cut (not sure what its called) he says no. Also if I say lets sell the baby stuff then he goes meeehhhh.. maby and then shrugges it off and does nothing about it.
I have come the past year from, not wanting and having the option open to wanting another but unsure when to wanting and like wanting to decide when to start TTC. Would love to start next summer, then there is 1 year left of my education, I could take one year off and then finish. Another thing is that DH is sometimes like he is going over to wanting another. He talks that way but if asked more about it he goes no, I dont want to. Also if the boys are acting badly and stuff he says to me "and you want another!!?" and that pisses me off. Also late this summer his niece lost her baby at 2 month old, SID. I lost longing to have another, not wanting to take the risk again (longing then returned double!) but it had the opposite affect on him, after geting the news he felt he wanted another. But is back to this no/yes kind of wibe.
I am so hoping that maby around xmas when the younger is bigger, talking more and maby potty trained that DH will be open to the idea of TTC next summer.
Am I crazy for wanting another? Is there something I could say to DH to change his mind? I dont want to push him and make him do it if he doesnt. I think it is better not having more children even if you want one than having one and regret it.
I am studying at University, just started my third year and my education takes 5 years. By then I will have B.ed degree and M.ed degree and have licence to teach teenagers at primary school.
Now then, litle background story over and to the point!
It is funny that when talking about having kids my DH wanted 3 and I 2. When DS#1 was born my DH said shortly after lets have another. It was to early for my point of wiev but not long after that we decited to start TTC and got pg in first try. DS#1 was just 2,5 years old when DS#2 was born. So it has been loads to do, some times hard having two boys, short age gap and boys that have loads of energy. The younger is also so I dont know the english word. Well he thinks he is bigger than he is so he tends to do things by his own, he just wonders off and doesnt look back, just walks away if he feels like it if he sees something interesting or wants to go somewhere. He opens the fridge, kitchen kabinets and so on if he is hungry (he does not ask me first, just goes and gets something) he even takes a chair and pulls it to the counter, climbs up, opens the high kitchen kabinets and search there for something nice (candy sometimes or biscits) and I am always telling him off about it and fearing he will fall down. So you see, he is headstrong, goes his ways and does not take directions well. There is hovever no tantrums or nothing like that but the other thing can piss you off alot.
So they can be handful but when meeting my SIL boys at the same age we feel ours are angels. But because of that, DH feels having kids is so mutch work, he loves them dearly and plays alot with them but some aspects he does not like, like puting them in bed, he does it but not loves it.
A year ago I felt like not having more kids but didnt close the window on it that maby later, maby after my education. But Dh was like no more babys. But when I ask if he wouldnt then get you know what cut (not sure what its called) he says no. Also if I say lets sell the baby stuff then he goes meeehhhh.. maby and then shrugges it off and does nothing about it.
I have come the past year from, not wanting and having the option open to wanting another but unsure when to wanting and like wanting to decide when to start TTC. Would love to start next summer, then there is 1 year left of my education, I could take one year off and then finish. Another thing is that DH is sometimes like he is going over to wanting another. He talks that way but if asked more about it he goes no, I dont want to. Also if the boys are acting badly and stuff he says to me "and you want another!!?" and that pisses me off. Also late this summer his niece lost her baby at 2 month old, SID. I lost longing to have another, not wanting to take the risk again (longing then returned double!) but it had the opposite affect on him, after geting the news he felt he wanted another. But is back to this no/yes kind of wibe.
I am so hoping that maby around xmas when the younger is bigger, talking more and maby potty trained that DH will be open to the idea of TTC next summer.
Am I crazy for wanting another? Is there something I could say to DH to change his mind? I dont want to push him and make him do it if he doesnt. I think it is better not having more children even if you want one than having one and regret it.
and even in times when they are driving me crazy when misbehaving. The thing is that I have been wondering if it wont be easier in a way if we had three because there will be bigger age gap and the biggest will be able to help in a way of keeping an eye on the middle one and so on. 
