Dealing with azoospermia?

[deafgal01]

injection? You're brave... At least you will be getting your baby soon! Not much longer to wait for that to happen.

 

[wibble wobble]

Got my fingers crossed for you deb xxx

 

[Deb111]

injection? You're brave... At least you will be getting your baby soon! Not much longer to wait for that to happen.

Let's hope so! The injections really aren't bad - I barely felt most of them and you soon get to be a 'pro' I had to do 15 last cycle (14 dailies and the trigger one to mature the eggs), this time it's just the one - it's the progesterone pessaries I struggled with more and I have to do those this time too, but they don't freak me out as much anymore

 

[deafgal01]

That's good to know... Of course that means I'd have to get over my "passionate dislike for needles"... shots and blood draws I hate them... DH always has to go with me when I get my blood taken cuz I don't like the needles. As for the shots, I just try to visualize a happy thought/picture to distract myself from the task while they do the shot. Injections... Hmmm... I wonder what the dr will suggest that we need to do for me to get pregnant. Hey, I'll do it if it means I could be pregnant with a baby at some point soon.

 

[Sar187]

Deb-I completely understand where you are coming from with how hard the decision is. While on the one hand, you want to make sure you are ready, knowing that there is really no possible chance of it happening naturally also makes it so hard to decide to wait. When I did the back to back fresh cycles I was glad I did it that way and yet in some ways wished I had waited, It was tough emotionally, it got me my BFP though. Also remember that FET's are a lot less stressful than fresh cycles both physically and emotionally. Best of luck!

Becky-Ugh, it sounds like its one thing after another for you. Hoping things start turning around!

Silverbell-They used the dissolving stitches on DH. I would think most would use something of the sort to avoid having to remove stitches from that area. DH's incision on his sac was about 1/2" to an 1" and from what I know they just use a testicular biopsy gun to remove the tissue from the testicles. My DH was able to shower the day after surgery and everything and had no issue though he was definitely glad to have the pain meds. He also had a post op appt but it was almost 3 weeks after the op.

Deafgal-For my IVF cycles I had 3 injections a day for 2 weeks, they were simple though and they are tiny needles, the biggest is the trigger and even that one I didn't feel.

AFM-Not much new, still feeling fine and just waiting for a look at everything on Monday. I just found out yesterday that Next Friday the company I work for is closing for good, so am a little stressed about how we are going to afford everything now but am trying to have faith that everything will work out.

 

[Deb111]

Deafgal - you are fairly likely to need IVF / ICSI unless your partner has a hormone problem which is fixable and that would mean giving yourself the injections, or your partner doing them for you, but I've read enough stories on here of people who are REAL needle-phobics and yet are real pro's at it within a day or 2 to know that you'd be fine if you had to do it

Thanks Sar so sorry to hear about your job - hoping it all works out for you xx

 

[Sar187]

I also wanted to post this link that I thought you all would like. I posted it on my blog awhile ago, and I think it helps us all realize that we aren't alone in the things we are feeling and thinking.
https://www.resolve.org/support-and-services/for-family--friends/infertility-etiquette.html

I also wanted to share a poem that someone on another board posted.



There are women who become mothers without effort, without thought, without patience or loss,and though they are good mothers and love their children,I know that I will be better.

I will be better not because of genetics or money or because I have read more books,but because I have struggled and toiled for this child.

I have longed and waited.I have cried and prayed.I have endured and planned over and over again.

Like most things in life, the people who truly have appreciation are those who have struggled to attain their dreams.I will notice everything about my child.

I will take time to watch my child sleep,explore,and discover.I will marvel at this miracle every day for the rest of my life.I will be happy when I wake in the middle of the night to the sound of my child, knowing that I can comfort, hold, and feed him and that I am not waking to take another temperature, pop another pill, take another shot or cry tears of a broken dream.

My dream will be crying for me.I count myself lucky in this sense; that God has given me this insight, this special vision with which I will look upon my child.Whether I parent a child I actually give birth to or a child that God leads me to, I will not be careless with my love.

I will be a better mother for all that I have endured. I am a better wife, a better aunt, a better daughter, neighbor, friend, and sister because I have known pain.I know disillusionment, as I have been betrayed by my own body. I have been tried by fire and hell that many never face, yet given time, I stood tall.

I have prevailed.I have succeeded.I have won.

So now, when others hurt around me, I do not run from their pain in order to save myself discomfort. I see it, mourn it, and join them in theirs.I listen.And even though I cannot make it better, I can make it less lonely.

I have learned the immense power of another hand holding tight to mine, of other eyes that moisten as they learn to accept the harsh truth when life is beyond hard.I have learned a compassion that only comes by walking in those shoes.

I have learned to appreciate life.

Yes, I will be a wonderful mother.-ANON

 

[Deb111]

Sar that's beautiful - thanks for sharing

Can't remember who asked recently about charting / OPK's etc - personally I stopped mine the day we had the azoo diagnosis comfirmed - it was just too painful. The first couple of months were really hard as I had got to know my body really well and knew exactly what the EWCM meant and the ovulation twinges and I thought that would never go away, but it did - pretty quickly too.

Some men with azoo are simply not producing ANY sperm, other however are producing some in MINUTE numbers, just not enough to make it into the ejaculate. I guess if that's the case, there could be 'some' hope, but then if you're like me, who has no sex life anymore because of the hormone problems and azoo, there REALLY is no point in knowing when you're about to ovulate is there

 

[Deb111]

I also wanted to post this link that I thought you all would like. I posted it on my blog awhile ago, and I think it helps us all realize that we aren't alone in the things we are feeling and thinking.
https://www.resolve.org/support-and-services/for-family--friends/infertility-etiquette.html

Bawled my eyes out reading that Sar - thanks for posting it - very insightful xx

 

[deafgal01]

I teared up several times reading that... Thanks for sharing Sar- and lovely poem. I'm glad you shared with us.

Deb- I think it might be a hormone issue. Hopefully today DH's blood test shows better results but I'm not being too hopeful in case it's the same from last week- high prolactin and low testerone.

 

[snd80]

On the subject of OPKs and charting, after our diagnosis, I stopped all together. I was so pissed off, I threw away all my charts, prenatal vitamins and my thermometer. Then after about a month, I started temping again when we decided to go w/ donor. When I went to the specialist in Nov, he seen my temp chart and told me to stop. But I still use a little chart to keep up with my cycle days and still do the OPKs (for my sake) w/out the temping. It helps me keep track of everything. I can tell you exactally when I am to OV and to start; although I was late OV by 2 days this month. Could be b/c all the cold meds I've been on? IDK! That said, if you choose to do the OPKs, get the Clear Blue Digitals w/ the smily face. They are the only ones I use! The others I could never read right and at least with the smily face, I know for sure! They are expensive, but so worth it! WalMart.com has a 20 pack for like $40.

AFM, I had a sudden realization Monday that I only have 5 months left to wait! WOW! It seems like along time, but not really! So I have started the gym hard again and am soooo sore! LOL! But I know it will be worth it! I am excited and nervous all at the same time! I have managed to save up more than was stolen from us since Nov and only have about $1000 more to go, but I can do it no problem by May! Hubby says after we get the $1000 finished, he is going to start buying up diapers and a crib, but I think that may be jumping the gun; but at least he is thinking ahead, right?! Guess that means he is on board for sure!

Deb- I am really praying that this one works for you!!!! You so deserve it! You have been our rock and such a help to all of us on here!

Sar- So sorry about your job! Just remember that everything happens for a reason! Hey! At least you got your BFP before your insurance ran out, right? =)

to everyone else and hope you are all doing well!

 

[Sar187]

snd-Yay to only 5 months left! I am actually lucky with insurance because I am on DH's insurance policy. Thank god!

 

[deafgal01]

Sar- that's a relief that you're still on your hubby's insurance. Sucks to lose the job you had though. I'll be praying that you find another job soon.

 

[wibble wobble]

Sorry to hear about your job sar that's rubbish timing

deafgal I learned the hard way not to be too hopeful for the best. When we got the first sa back with zero sperm my initial reaction was 'he has a blockage' then when that got ruled out I was it's ok he hasn't got any gene defects or major hormonal problems just a raised fsh. I went through the whole journey from the first sa to the tese being too hopeful. I pinned everything on the tese being successful.... it hit me really hard when that came back as zero too. I'd planned so much in my head run away with possible treatment dates.... in fact if everything had gone to my plan I'd have had my first icsi and would be pregnant already. I'm not saying you should have no hope but that you should always have the worse case scenario in your thoughts.

Snd wow only 5 months until you start that'll fly by in no time

 

[raelynn]

Thanks ladies for the temping/charting/opk insight. I don't really use OPKs since I have PCOS and I'd waste a whole lot of them trying to predict my crazy cycles. I chart for the same reason though. I never have any clue where I am in my cycle since they are never the same. But, I think I'll take a break since there really is little point in it all right now.

I called the fertility center today to try and make an appointment but they said they didn't take our insurance which I was entirely confused by since it is the same place hubby got both his SA's done and they took his insurance, no problem (we're both on his plan). But they called back once I was back at work and said to call them and they have more info on our insurance so maybe they figured it out I thought making the appointment was supposed to be the easy part. Guess I will have to try again tomorrow.

 

[Deb111]

Raelynn -unfortunately you are likely to find that none of this is easy - we all seem to have had to chase referals and appts, chase results, been given some kind of incorrect info at some point (we were actually sent a letter telling us hubby's first SA was 'normal' and then got hit with the azoo at our next appt with no warning - apparently someone had just pressed the wrong button and sent the wrong letter! )

I really hope the clinic get it sorted for you

I don't know how it is with PCOS, but they weren;t that bothered about my cycle dates etc as once you start IVF / ICSI, they control your cycle anyway xx

 

[CanadianMaple]

Thank you for the support girls. It's been a rough 5 weeks, probably the worst I have gone through in my life.

raelynn- I have been a charter since 2005. I quit the day we found out about the azoo. It was too painful to continue. But, now that I am getting closer to when AF may be due, I'm finding it hard to not know what's happening. But, I don't care, I can't watch myself ovulate like I used to. My cycles were off since we started TTC and I was getting a ton of false OPKs (smiley ones even) so I don't even want to do that. I think that if we end up doing diui, I will start again. With IVF, they control my cycle.

I'm worrying a lot about how how I have noticed that DH's testicles are small. I never used to think a lot about it before we were about to do our first SA. I'm guessing it means non-obstructive, so it makes me feel less optimistic about us having positive results.

 

[CanadianMaple]

Deb, that's awful about being given the wrong results. That's almost a cruel joke.

 

[Deb111]

We went to our second FS appt thinking it was going to be the next round of tests for me - checking my tubes etc and I was very apprehensive about it and in the space of 2 mins were confronted with "so you know your husband isn't producing any sperm and your best options are probably adoption or donor sperm" - talk about a kick in the guts!!! I remember very little about that appt after that news, but I do remember collapsing in the corridor sobbing.

Anyway, I wouldn't get yourself too worried about the size of dh's testicles - I'm sure all men are different - wait and see what his specialist has to say. And remember, even if the results indicate testicular failure, there is no way of telling how much of them is affected without doing some sort of surgical procedure.

My hubby's results indicated testicular failure and we still got enough great quality sperm to fertilise my 8 eggs (with a small amount left ot freeze). Ok, I didn't get a , but that's to do with my body not letting it implant or an abnormality with the eggs (which apparently is the case with a large percentage of any woman's eggs) - not his sperm - his sperm fertilised 3 eggs and produced 3 fabulous blastocysts!

Love the new photo snd

 

[wibble wobble]

Canadian Maple I never thought anything of hubby's small testicles until we got to the fertility clinic and the consultant measured them. I never asked why but from being on forums and talking to others whose partners have been diagnosed with NOA it seems to be a common characteristic in the men with it. There's still every chance they'll find sperm when they do a Tese. 1 friend got given a 5% chance they'd find sperm and she's almost 6 months pregnant now.