***December Snowflakes 2012 Parenting***

[Chloe597]

lolly, do you or any of the other moms have a good recommendation for a sling? i have heard they can be used for hands free breast feeding. i saw a mom with one that had a ring on it.

i had another bout of crying today when DH went to our new house to paint. Gabby's early arrival really put a kink in our plans to have the new house ready to move into before her arrival. i hate that he has to spend weekends away from us and then goes to work during the week. i dont know if this is just new motherhood taking its toll on me or if its a sign of PPD. i definitely feel so much love and joy when i look at Gabby so i dont see how it could be PPD?? and i'm definitely one of those FTMs that records every feeding and from which boob. i use the feed baby app for that glad i'm not alone in the late night cluster feeds. gabby pretty much only cries when hungry or cold, so i think so far i'm actually pretty lucky, despite the lack of sleep.

 

[Fifipots]

I have used a sling with all my babies, and not necessarily while out and about, I used to put DD3 in it while I cooked dinner for the older 2 as she was always grouchy at this time, worked a treat

 

[Ichisan]

The only sling that is really reccomended to feed in is a ring sling as you can sit them more upright and their chins wont fall on their chests For a newborn you can go for a stretchy sling/wrap but these are only suitable until about 6months as their weight pulls the fabric too much then. After that a more structured or woven wrap is good. There are also mei tai styles which are good from little There are loads of different types out there I have a caboo close which we LOVE and have been using since Ruri was born and also a mei tai for when she is a bit older. Look online for a local sling meet or sling library near you where you can go and try them all out and hire to try at home before you buy. Its usually only a few pounds per week to hire At this age I would say stay away from baby bjorn carriers as they really do no favours to you or bubs, look at ergos instead if you like that style of carrier

Hope everyones doing ok and yay for all the mamas now over here!

 

[Bay]

Ahh yes i remember the baby carrier. I used to carry my first in the baby bjorn while doing housework because he would scream if i ever walked out of his sight ... I would never have gussed he would be such an independent toddler today.

I haven't tried other slings. Is there a big difference between a sling and the baby bjorn?

And yes lolly i too am very surprised by different the two boys are.

Chloe - i've used the baby bjorn and it worked for us but only as bubba was a little older as i find my newborn can get lost in it. i don't know how they compare to other types of carriers though. If you wanted something that allows breastfeeding, it probably isn't for you. Also, i think what you've described sounds normal. I'm not one to cry, but last week i was bawling my eyes out just telling dh how wonderful it was to have him home and the idea of him going back to work really upset me. He goes back on2nd of jan, and iimagine i will be a wreck in the leadup to it.

 

[2016]

I have a stretchy wrap like a moby and manage to bf in that I just have to slip one of my shoulders out on the side I want to feed. Other mums have recommended a Mai Tai Hopp Tie and an ergo.
My wrap is an absolute godsend because my little madam won't be put down EVER and also isn't happy with anyone other than me! Going to probably by an ergo to use from about 4 months when she might be too heavy for the other wrap.

I had a real breakdown yesterday. Took both kids out in the car to try visit a friend. Got stuck in awful traffic and DD just screamed and screamed because she wasnt with me. I couldn't do anything to comfort her and it was like a living hell. I turned around and drove home as I just couldn't take anymore.
Since Friday she's gone from being ok in her nest chair for short periods to absolutely refusing to go to anyone or be out down ever. So she's been in the sling all day which I find exhausting! I would just like 10 mins to shower without having to listen to her scram in OHs arms...or to be able to eat a meal without trying to eat contorted to the side so I don't spill on her. And she still will only sleep on my chest at night and again I wish I could just roll on my side for 30 seconds or go pee in the night without having to put her down and then she kicks off.
Then there's the criticism from people the age-old "rod for my back" and "spoiling" her by carrying her in a sling and letting her sleep on me. Well wth am I supposed to do? Let her scream which also then ends up inherent vomiting, choking and in pain? Wish they'd just shut up!

 

[Chloe597]

Thanks for the sling advice, ladies. I have a Bjorn and DD gets swallowed up by it so we haven't used it yet. I may try for a Maya wrap.

2016, when your lo was ok by herself, how long could u leave her? I'm with u in that I wouldn't want to just let her cry if you know what soothes her. Vomity choking baby does not sound like a good alternative. Hopefully it is a short lived phase. I have read that it sometimes helps to have a small toy that mom wears in her shirt for a while to pick up her scent and then to leave that near the LO so she is comforted by moms smell. Also read that warming the bed with a heating pad can help the transition from mom to bed. Not sure if any of these work but could be worth a shot. Taking 10 min out for a shower really does feel great. I wouldn't feel half myself if I didn't get a daily shower and change out of my pajamas!

 

[2016]

Thanks Chloe. When she was ok in her nest chair I would get around 1/2 hour and sometimes if I handed her to someone while she was asleep she would stay asleep for 1/2 hour on them. I am sure it's because of the leap she is now having none of this. She gets overtired/overstimulated at the drop of a hat and then even I struggle to get her to stop fussing. Only the sling seems to work now!

When I have tried to get her to lay next to me on the bed I have sat where I intend her to lay while I feed her which would warm up the bed and make it smell like me (like my bum poor child but nevermind). I can feed her and have her deeply asleep but the second I try lower her onto the bed she is awake and crying. It doesn't matter if I lay her on her front/back/side it's the same result. I have also worn a comfort blankie down my top all day to give to her if she is passed to somone else or if I want to put her down but she doesn't care. I mean why is she not even happy being with her dad? My OH is using it as a great excuse and hands her to me the second she grumbles without even attempting to soothe her.

 

[mtmnleg]

Can you add arianna Michelle born 12/9/12? so excited to join you ladies over here!!!

 

[LillyLee]

Chloe had to comment on your post about slings (I've been following this thread too seeing how everyone is dealing with breastfeeding etc and waiting for my turn). There's a Facebook group called "baby wearing swap" and lots of moms selling used slings and woven wraps. If you like the look of a "soft structured carrier" which is similar to the ergo or baby bjorn there are two companies that I would recommend. Kinderpack and bamberoo. Kinderpack is my personal choice an I will be buying a standard/standard size for baby once I find a pattern I like. I don't know a lot about ring slings but have purchased a woven wrap called a didymos waves which can be configured like a sling or for front or back carry later on. Woven wraps last longer than say a baby ktan or moby as they have no stretch to them and can support a greater amount of weight. Another forum to check out would be The Babywearer it's structured a lot like B&B but all about various types of carriers and the ladies on there are extremely helpful.

A website called paxbaby rents various types of carriers and slings but I checked their website and I think they are closed for the Christmas holidays as far as loaning goes. I would start with the other forum and figure out what you want and then try to find something on the swap Facebook group.

I do have to put a disclaimer here though. I'm not a fan of the bjorn carriers unless they've changed and you'll find most moms who Babywear aren't either. They do what's called a "crotch hang" which is supposedly not good for babies developing hips. That's why styles like the ergo have become so popular because they hold the baby from knee to knee which supports back and pelvis. The two companies I mentioned above are also designed for knee to knee carry and I'm just choosing kinderpack as its a wahm business and not a large corporation like ergo.

 

[toothfairy29]

Hello!!!!!!! Finally can you add us please?

Joseph Oscar born 15/12/12 at 2.21am by very traumatic emergency Caesarean section. He weighs 7lb 10oz. He is amazingly cute. Hoping to go home tomorrow so will do photos. Signal in here is too weak to do it.

 

[Chloe597]

Thanks for the info, lilly! You have done quite the research on babywearing, i'm impressed! I'll check out that facebook group. I am not sold on the bjorn, i only have one because i found it at a garage sale. Gabby sinks right to the bottom of it now so we aren't using it yet. I hope your LO arrives soon! I see you are overdue now. Today was my due date, and I must say, its been nice not being pregnant! I can only imagine those last couple weeks would have been so much more uncomfortable!

 

[GenYsuperlady]

Boy this thread is starting to move fast!!

Congrats and welcome to the new mamas!

I'm still pretty well on the up and up PPD-wise. My mom came back yesterday and babysat while DH took me on a date! He surprised me big time by taking me to see The Nutcracker, which I'd never seen. Imagine that!! My manly man taking me to the ballet. Then we had dinner and drinks (!) and went for ice cream after. We were exhausted so came home a bit early but it was lovely.

We even DTD for the first time again! It was more sore than I anticipated, being 4 weeks out, and the condom was no fun (no bc yet!) but it was a good way to connect physically again.

Summer is a lovely baby...she only gets very fussy if she is super gassy or has been awake too long but can't get herself to relax to sleep. I keep thinking if she is so easy, I should fear our next LO! Sounds like I'm not bound to get 2 the same

My mom is still driving me batty, but she's so great with Summer. DH had to talk me out of laying into her this morning when I was frustrated...she will do anything involving watching the baby, but otherwise acts like a total guest in the house. We've cooked all the dinners and she hasn't done much in the way of helping clean. In fact, her clutter is all over!! Thankfully she will be gone again a few days this week to attend to business again. I'm sure she is just as sick of me at this point...

Carriers: I have Ergo and Moby...so far I like both but don't need to worry about BFing so ?!

I'm sorry some of you are having hard times. F$&@ anyone who will judge a mother for letting her newborn be on her if that's what it takes to calm the child. You cannot spoil a newborn!!! They need comfort and to know that the world is a safe place. Bless all of your hearts...such loving mommies here.

 

[mummyof2girlz]

i forgot about this thread my little boy Isaac was born on the 8th of December can you add me please.

 

[ttc_lolly]

Thanks for all the sling and carrier advice ladies, I have no clue as didn't babywear at all with DD1.

2016, sorry you had a rough day I have a total mummy's girl too. It's lovely but I hear you about just needing a break every now and again. I don't have time to shower at all lately, and have even had to resort to having the odd quick strip down wash whilst in the bathroom just so I am getting a clean!! not good! I hate it when people try give their opinions on how you soothe your child and all this crap about making a rod for your own back I hope you told them where to go, I would have!

Welcome over mtmnleg, toothfairy & mummyof2girlz have added all of your little darlings to the list

Awww how sweet of your OH GenY glad you had a good date! It's my birthday on wednesday and OH was talking about taking me out for a meal with the girls in tow but I'm thinking it's a bit too much for me right now. We should be in our new house either tomorrow or wednesday so I'm thinking a nice takeaway and a movie will do me just fine. He can make it up to me in a few weeks time once Millie is in some sort of routine! We haven't DTD yet, but if you found it a bit sore/uncomfortable I'd recommend using a bit of lube (that's if you didn't already?).

Millie has had a good couple of night's and I'm really feeling the benefits. I think I managed around 5-6hrs sleep last night and I feel great today. Good job really, seeing as we may be moving house tomorrow and I still have quite a bit to do I picked up Millie's swing yesterday and so far it hasn't made a massive impact! She won't be put in it awake but once she's settled on me I can smoothly transfer her in to it and she'll stay there for a couple of hours so it's helped so far. Off to go look at some slings and wraps now...

 

[ttc_lolly]

Oh, also any body's baby's suffering from newborn acne? Millie's is quite bad and it makes me a little sad I know it can be normal and should shift once my hormones have left her system but it looks a little itchy/sore. I've been wiping her face clean with some cotton wool and water, and will even rub a little dribbled BM on them too (magical healing qualities to the rescue!).

 

[2016]

Yeah LO is definitely looking very spotty too TTC_lolly. BM does work a treat!

 

[Chloe597]

Gabby has baby acne too. Haven't tried intentionally putting BM on her face but i've done a good job of spraying her with a boob as she tries to latch. it is quite a sight. i feel like a firehose sometimes the way it just streams out. Just got back from the Dr. she is 8 lbs 6 oz already! born at 6 lbs 13 oz. Doc said i no longer have to wake her up to eat and to just let her choose her own schedule until she is ~3 months old.

 

[Bay]

2016 hopefully when bubba is a little older, she can be a little more relaxed about being away from you in small doses. You sound like you are doing a wonderful job in raising those kids, so try not to listen to other's remarks. You know your baby bet and have her best interest inmind. That's all that matters.

Maybe when she's less colicky, you could try side lying position again? Letting her self serve while you rest will at least give you a break from holding her nonstop. My first son was like this, very clingy with me, though not quite as extreme as your little one. But he did need to be onmychest or he won't sleep and scream the house down. But then we discovered side lying feeding as he got a tad bigger and that was when he started sleeping onhis own (sort of).

Anyway, hope you get lots of support you deserve. We all do, because being a mum is harder than anyone gives credit for.

AFM, i think i have plugged ducts. Though not quite mastitis yet. My right boob is always so full, it's hard at the side andbelow and thearea of skn on my side is red. It feels harder though nodistinct lump and not overly painful. i've been feverish since yesterday afternoon(it is now the next morning). I ke massaging it and hopefully it will just unplug itself eventually ... I really don't want totake antibiotics, ewww.

My, quite the essay i've written haha

 

[ttc_lolly]

I'll carry on applying BM to her face then and hope they start to clear up soon. I'm not a vain mummy in the slightest, but I do feel a little sad when I see them on her face mainly just because they are quite big and red and I know when I have a big red spot it's usually sore so I imagine hers are too here's a pic I took of them the other day;

https://i1129.photobucket.com/albums/m503/laurynp86/6BA57048-7F6C-49A1-807E-5B4BE69407F4-2839-000001BEA78B5AB9.jpg

She's giving me that look again, probably sick of me taking photos Chloe that's so funny, I'm the same I removed my breast pad last night and had my nursing bra's flap down ready to feed Millie, I was bare for about 10-15 seconds if that and I had drenched the bottom of my top and my right thigh trouser leg I have a really strong let down on my right side so no wonder it just streams out of me without the baby having to do anything!

 

[ttc_lolly]

Ouch Bay, I hope it doesn't develop into mastitis. Try massaging your breasts in the shower and also when baby is feeding you can try wearing cabbage leaves in your bra too, that's supposed to help relieve some of the pain x