DH wants baby named after him.. but i HATE his name!

[GetNmyBelly]

I wouldn't pick a name my husband didn't like & tell him it didn't matter that he didn't like it or anything like that that would be wrong & who does that lol ?! but he annoys me sometimes with names 2. before we found out it was a boy I was already thinking of boy names & I brought up the name Gage & he said he liked it. a few weeks later after finding out our baby is a boy we were with his dad & brother & I brought up Gage & his brother & dad of course didn't like it. then when we got home later that day I asked DH about the name Gage again & he then said he didn't like it! im just not discussing names with anyone but him anymore.

 

[AP]

I wouldn't pick a name my husband didn't like & tell him it didn't matter that he didn't like it or anything like that that would be wrong & who does that lol ?! but he annoys me sometimes with names 2. before we found out it was a boy I was already thinking of boy names & I brought up the name Gage & he said he liked it. a few weeks later after finding out our baby is a boy we were with his dad & brother & I brought up Gage again & they both of course didn't like it. then when we got home later that day I asked DH about the name Gage again & he said he didn't like it! im just not discussing names with anyone but him anymore.

Do you think perhaps he was discussing names and they put him off? Might be worthwhile to agree you both dont discuss it with anyone, not just you

 

[GetNmyBelly]

I wouldn't pick a name my husband didn't like & tell him it didn't matter that he didn't like it or anything like that that would be wrong & who does that lol ?! but he annoys me sometimes with names 2. before we found out it was a boy I was already thinking of boy names & I brought up the name Gage & he said he liked it. a few weeks later after finding out our baby is a boy we were with his dad & brother & I brought up Gage again & they both of course didn't like it. then when we got home later that day I asked DH about the name Gage again & he said he didn't like it! im just not discussing names with anyone but him anymore.

Do you think perhaps he was discussing names and they put him off? Might be worthwhile to agree you both dont discuss it with anyone, not just you

I don't know what it is.. his dad never really has anything nice 2 say about any name I bring up? maybe its not the names he doesn't like maybe its me lol. I definitely think his dad & brother not liking the name Gage made my husband suddenly not like it because he liked it weeks before. when he said he didn't like it I even asked him why he said he liked it a few weeks ago & said he didn't remember saying he liked it. He did tho. my FIL is also just really immature. this is his first grandchild. him & my husbands mom have been divorced a long time & they both have been remarried for over 15 years.. well my MIL lives far away & is flying here for 10 days in September near my due date so she can possibly be here when hes born. DH told his dad she might be at the hospital when hes born & to please get along with her & he said "o that will be really easy because if shes there I wont be." it really hurt my husband.

 

[mummyruston]

I think naming a baby and indeed a person is a huge responsibility and if you're not keen and feel uncomfortable I think you should say. I personally think naming children after their father and grandfather etc in today's world is rather old fashioned and think the child will grow up thinking why couldn't I have my own identity (not to mention it's not a particularly popular name and you don't like it). I agree with with an earlier post about the child tSking on surname - maybe Gary as a middle as a compromise?

 

[mummyruston]

I also think it's nobody's business but yours and OHs. I make tings up when ppl ask saying we're not sure and can't agree because I remember the first time and getting eye rolls and remarks when discussing names when pregnant with DD.

In my opinion parents and in laws had their babies and their chance to name children so they can steer clear of turning their noses up at my OH and my decisions.

 

[MissMaggieMay]

I would totally name my baby after my husband, even if I didn't like his name. Actually, my husband's middle name is my ex-boyfriend's name, and if he wanted to name one of our babies that I would still do it, even though I absolutely despise that name.
Firstly because it's such a blessing to have a husband that is excited about his wife being pregnant. I've seen SO many people who are going through their pregnancy alone and their OH doesn't seem to care at all. If your husband is that excited, I'd do it. It obviously means a lot to him.
I don't think you'll mind it so much when the baby is born. At least for me, I have no doubt if we named our baby my husband's middle name (my ex's name) all the negative, disgusting feelings I have attached to that name in my mind would be replaced with positive, sweet ones.
I'm not a fan on the name, but I'm a huge fan of my husband, and I know I'll be a huge fan of my baby, and in the end that's what really matters.

 

[Zephram]

I think it's quite narcissistic for your OH and FIL to insist your son be named after them. It's completely fine to carry on family traditions though and I think a reasonable compromise for you all is Gary as a middle name and a new first name that you and OH agree on.

To be frank, your FIL doesn't get a say either. He's had his go at naming kids and now it's your turn.

 

[bcos21]

I don't care for naming kids Jr or third etc. So what if he doesn't get another son, he's still genetically half his is a he not? I think its important for both parents to feel good about the name. I find naming him Gary but calling him trey a bit confusing honestly. Good luck to you 😃

 

[Charliejones]

Ooh this story rings my bells from when I had my little boy! my partner and FIL EXPECTED, not even asked me for our son to BE called.......wait for it..........barry as that's FIL name and also my partners middle name along with his brothers middle name.


Having a baby You do as a couple and will be full of joint decisions along the way but like other people have said the name is for both of you and a big decision. What if you wanted part of your side of the family in the name? Like your father? In my situation ( we are not married after 7 years!lol) my children will be having his surname which of course I'm on board with but for me I do feel a little left behind as I'll have a different name to my family
So if you don't like Gary don't use it! I compromised in the end with my sons middle name being named Alexander after my OH but would never dream of using Barry!

You should never feel pressured into anything to please other members of the family, they had their kids they need to let you enjoy yours! It's a very old fashioned thing these days I think and I think the elderly will always be stuck in their ways, this being 1 of them having their input because that's how they would of done it.


You'll probably find you could have the nicest name possible and they still wouldn't approve anyway, I for one can't wait to see my MIL's reaction when she finds out our daughters name

Sorry for the essay! Good luck xxx

 

[MamaBunny2]

Well just found out we are having a son and thank goodness my OH was totally willing to compromise and allow me to give our son a middle name after my late father instead of his alive and well grandfather. We also both agree on possible first names, neither of them being after anyone and not the name he so badly wanted that I despised.

I believe it's all about compromise. He's leaning towards one name over the other while I'm still undecided but overall we will both be content with our son's name I would be so upset to name my child something I'm not comfortable with

 

[mummyruston]

Good for you a name is a deeply personal thing and it shouldn't be rushed into or expected.

 

[stiletto_mom]

Nope.

DH is a Jr (but he's technically the third). I'm sure his family will want us to name our future son after him.

But it ain't happening. Even if DH wanted it that way. The answer is no.

 

[meg_bellamy]

I hate passing names down the family like that (as in every male is called the same thing). My baby is his own person with his own identity and deserves his own name. I too think that the baby having my husband's surname is enough and he AND his family should be happy with that.

 

[meg_bellamy]

What if you wanted part of your side of the family in the name? Like your father? In my situation ( we are not married after 7 years!lol) my children will be having his surname which of course I'm on board with but for me I do feel a little left behind as I'll have a different name to my family

I agree! The baby is already getting the father's last name, isn't that enough?? Both DH and MIL said if we had a boy it would be nice for it to have the same middle name as DH which is his grandfather's name (to keep passing it down). Ummmm what about something from MY side of the family?? The baby is half mine as well???? So we agreed that using my maiden name as a middle name for a boy would be nice. And no way would I be giving my baby the same first name as anyone else in the family - it deserves its own name.