Holliems
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I am only on month 3 TTC. CD 9 or 10 today. I had very high hopes this month as Ive started temping..using preseed..OPKs....
I had my DH set up an appointment to have a sperm analysis. I started googling to see how he'd have to prepare for the appt....I asked DH if he had, had an undecended testical when he was born and when it dropped because I could have SWORN his mother told me about this once. He said yes. I asked when it finally dropped. 6 years old!! And hes not sure if it was just one or both. Which means he is probably infertile. Even if it was just one...odds are against us.
Im so depressed over this, tonight. Of course, I wont know one way or another until analysis is done. But what if it IS true. What if he cant have children?? I already have two and I am very grateful, but I really really wanted another.. one with my new husband. I want to share with him something so beautiful. Its been all Ive thought about, day after day...all day. It will probably never happen.
All this planning. All the staring at tests...temping...dreaming of what our baby would look like...Maybe it's all been for nothing.
I had my DH set up an appointment to have a sperm analysis. I started googling to see how he'd have to prepare for the appt....I asked DH if he had, had an undecended testical when he was born and when it dropped because I could have SWORN his mother told me about this once. He said yes. I asked when it finally dropped. 6 years old!! And hes not sure if it was just one or both. Which means he is probably infertile. Even if it was just one...odds are against us.
Im so depressed over this, tonight. Of course, I wont know one way or another until analysis is done. But what if it IS true. What if he cant have children?? I already have two and I am very grateful, but I really really wanted another.. one with my new husband. I want to share with him something so beautiful. Its been all Ive thought about, day after day...all day. It will probably never happen.
All this planning. All the staring at tests...temping...dreaming of what our baby would look like...Maybe it's all been for nothing.