Hi ladies Just thought I'd post on here for a bit of advice. Bit long winded but please bear with me! My beautiful baby girl was born last November so is just 5 months old now. The first few months were tough to say the least. I had a lot a trouble adjusting to motherhood and felt overwhlemed most of the time. As dreadful as this may sound during those first couple of months, I would have sold my soul to be able to go back to work and have some 'normality' back in my life and so I arranged with my employer to go back at the beginning of May (which is now just 2 weeks away). Anyway, to cut a long story short, over the last 2 months or so, I am pleased to say that I have now fully 'adjusted' to motherhood and love every moment of being with my little girl however, with the return to work date now looming, I can't bear the thought of leaving her. I know that all mums go through this and that it is something I will have to face up to eventually, but I really don't know if can do it. Financially, I really do need to go back to work although we could possibly scrape by. My husband is very supportive but is finding it difficult to understand how I'm feeling and thinks I should just go back and get it over with. I told him I'd live on baked beans for 3 months if it means I could stay with her but the whole idea of leaving her is breaking my heart. I left her for one day last week with the childminder as a trial day and the second she closed the front door I was a blubbering mess! I have to say that I've even stunned myself at the depth of emotion I'm feeling about this but as silly as it may sound, I just feel that she's MY baby and it should be me feeding her, playing with her and tucking her in for her naps. Do you think it's possible to tell my employer that I've changed my mind and want to change my return date? Any advice on this would be much apprecaited.