Epidural- why are people so against it?

[readynwilling]

I just hate it when people say getting an epi makes you less of a mother. In that case, the same should apply to women who get a c-section. I just don't get it

Agree 100,000%

In fact i think a c-section is probably more difficult than V-labour!!

If your child grows up to be a productive member of society - you were a good mother (and sometimes stuff like that has nothing to do with parenting and you were still a good mother). Choices like this do not affect ones bond with baby, or ability to be a parent!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

 

[melfy77]

I hate the whole 'FTM you don't know what to expect just you wait' blah blah. I find it a bit patronising if I'm really honest. Yes, NOTHING can prepare you for what you'll go through but that doesn't mean you won't be able to stick to (more or less) what you want.

Agreed. I was just suprised (and not at the same time) that I had to be in the minority in pretty much every aspect of my pregnancy: I had to be in 5% who would have 2 miscarriages in a row, in the 10% who will break their water first (without realizing it of course, since it was a random leak), and in the I don't know how small % whose labor wouldn't start at all. Add the back labor, and I was all set So yes, I'm glad I didn't have my perfect birth plan because I would have been very upset and threw that piece of paper out of the window

 

[melfy77]

I just hate it when people say getting an epi makes you less of a mother. In that case, the same should apply to women who get a c-section. I just don't get it

Agree 100,000%

In fact i think a c-section is probably more difficult than V-labour!!

I would also think so. I was back to my half-hour to 45 minutes walk the day following DD's birth. A friend of mine ended up getting a c-section after being stuck at 9.5 cm for 12 hours and got a horrible infection afterwards. It took a month before she could actually function again.

 

[readynwilling]

I just hate it when people say getting an epi makes you less of a mother. In that case, the same should apply to women who get a c-section. I just don't get it

Agree 100,000%

In fact i think a c-section is probably more difficult than V-labour!!

I would also think so. I was back to my half-hour to 45 minutes walk the day following DD's birth. A friend of mine ended up getting a c-section after being stuck at 9.5 cm for 12 hours and got a horrible infection afterwards. It took a month before she could actually function again.

I guess i should clarify that there are some pretty rough v-labours and some pretty easy peasy c-sections so this is not always going to be the case HAHAHA. And after reading some about your birth melfy, id probably put that right up there with c-seciton in terms of difficultness.

But yeah i was 100% the following day. My BF had a planned c-section (breech at 38 weeks) with her first and was in the hospital for 5 days and it was a few weeks before she was back to normal. She had a VBAC with her 2nd (which she swore she'd never do again LOL) and even that seemed a more difficult recovery then mine

 

[melfy77]

I just hate it when people say getting an epi makes you less of a mother. In that case, the same should apply to women who get a c-section. I just don't get it

Agree 100,000%

In fact i think a c-section is probably more difficult than V-labour!!

I would also think so. I was back to my half-hour to 45 minutes walk the day following DD's birth. A friend of mine ended up getting a c-section after being stuck at 9.5 cm for 12 hours and got a horrible infection afterwards. It took a month before she could actually function again.

I guess i should clarify that there are some pretty rough v-labours and some pretty easy peasy c-sections so this is not always going to be the case HAHAHA. And after reading some about your birth melfy, id probably put that right up there with c-seciton in terms of difficultness.

But yeah i was 100% the following day. My BF had a planned c-section (breech at 38 weeks) with her first and was in the hospital for 5 days and it was a few weeks before she was back to normal. She had a VBAC with her 2nd (which she swore she'd never do again LOL) and even that seemed a more difficult recovery then mine

I keep a very good memory of my labor, I still stayed mobile for the most of the process and DH was amazing. Another friend of mine had a c-section for her 1st (breech) and is expecting again for October, and I wonder what she's gonna do. Here in Canada VBAC seem to be quite common, but I've heard that in the States very few doctors want to do one...

 

[DLA]

The epidural needle does scare me and it would during labour. I personally have a severe phobia of needles, it's not a joke and unless you have it you can't possibly know what it's like. With my eldest two I had a cannula in my hand or inner elbow throughout labour it was really off putting and caused me a lot of anxiety and stress that did affect my labour, even if not looking at it. A needle in my back would be a million times worse. I'm sorry but it seems like some of the pro epidural mums are very dismissive of those who don't want an epidural like their reasons for not wanting one are foolish, silly, trying to be a martyr etc. if someone wants to avoid an epidural it's up to them and they don't need your judgement. Also nothing wrong with a FTM deciding she definitely doesn't want an epidural, sometimes being determined helps you to achieve what you wanted xx

That just makes me mad. No one should feel pressured into something they're not comfortable with. That's really lousy on the hospital's part...

Also I think you should be able to be proud of your sense of accomplishment in terms of not getting an epi. By you saying that, I in no way feel that it's taking my sense of accomplishment out of my birthing experience (with an epi). Can't compare them. Different experiences, different mothers!

 

[summer rain]

With my eldest there was a reason for having the cannula in as I did need antibiotics as my waters had broken some time before with my second eldest though it was a very modern forward thinking hospital and the best maternity unit in the UK so I was very surprised when they said I needed to have the cannula in especially as I was already 9cm dilated when I came in. Thankfully policies have changed a lot now though some midwives are telling me as this is baby number 5 I will have to have a cannula in even if I have a home birth and others are telling me they changed that guideline some years ago xx

 

[melfy77]

With my eldest there was a reason for having the cannula in as I did need antibiotics as my waters had broken some time before with my second eldest though it was a very modern forward thinking hospital and the best maternity unit in the UK so I was very surprised when they said I needed to have the cannula in especially as I was already 9cm dilated when I came in. Thankfully policies have changed a lot now though some midwives are telling me as this is baby number 5 I will have to have a cannula in even if I have a home birth and others are telling me they changed that guideline some years ago xx

I guess they just really don't want to take the risk. I tested positive for strep B so I knew I needed antibiotics, and after all I went through to get this rainbow, I wasn't gonna take the risk of getting her infected

 

[summer rain]

I don't have group b strep I was tested for it. With my second eldest there was no medical indication for me having the cannula and my waters hadn't broken yet all they could say was it was 'policy'. The reason they sometimes have the policy of mums who have had many children having the cannula in is to do with being able to easily administer extra doses of syntometrine(sp?) if needed however the royal college of obstetricians did research about a decade ago showing there was no increased risk of bleeding until a mother was on at least her sixth baby and even then if there was no prior history of bleeding the risk wasn't increased by that much. Some midwives and hospital units seem to be following the older policy though xx

 

[melfy77]

I don't have group b strep I was tested for it. With my second eldest there was no medical indication for me having the cannula and my waters hadn't broken yet all they could say was it was 'policy'. The reason they sometimes have the policy of mums who have had many children having the cannula in is to do with being able to easily administer extra doses of syntometrine(sp?) if needed however the royal college of obstetricians did research about a decade ago showing there was no increased risk of bleeding until a mother was on at least her sixth baby and even then if there was no prior history of bleeding the risk wasn't increased by that much. Some midwives and hospital units seem to be following the older policy though xx

That's odd, here unless you tested positive for strep B they don't give you antibiotics. What's syntometrine? Never heard of it. I'm assuming canula is kinda like an IV?

 

[MamaFlick]

I've been told by my midwife that I won't need to get an IV unless I'm beta strep b positive. However at the local hospital, EVERYONE gets an IV. Literally everyone. That's what they told me during my birthing class last week. Makes me even more happy that I'm having my baby at a hospital 45 minutes away rather than the one here in town. The reason I originally chose the hospital that I wanted a midwife, and the local hospital doesn't have any midwives who deliver there!

 

[starshinebby]

I guess I'm not a spiritual type then!! Cause my 'all natural' labor was nowhere near a 'beauriful dance' lol. More power to someone that can have that experience, but good or bad, I'm just happy for my great kids. Seriously, I felt no less an active participant when I had my medicated birth. For me, I was more rested and able to focus and enjoy my baby. To each his own though!

^^^WSS

I also wouldn't be so certain that you definitely won't have one. Because tbh, ftm's have no idea how you will feel at the time, or whether you will be induced (contractions tend to be stronger when induced). Unless you're at a birthing centre or at home where it's not an option. I think it's best to remain open minded. It's easy to say " I won't have this and I won't have that", but truth is you never know how you will feel and how you'll deal with the pain when the time comes.

There is beauty in everything. And a screaming, back to back contraction, blood, sweat, and tears birth is my idea of a beautiful dance, lol. Maybe I just see things differently? It's hard to explain, but there is defiantly beauty in the pain of it all.

And I think going in with the mindset of not wanting an epidural is the right way to go for me. I understand I have the FTM label on my head which most women take to mean I have no idea what I'm talking about, and you're right, I don't. But honestly, if going in thinking I won't get an epidural is the way I feel I should go, who are you to say I shouldn't go in with this type of mindset? If it works for me, it works for me. Doesn't mean it will work for everyone though, but I know myself and this is what I feel is best.

Of course I won't know how I will feel and how I will deal with the pain when the time comes, but that's why they tell women to prepare themselves as best as they can through reading, watching, and just understanding the entire birthing process. Doing that alone helps with take a lot of the mystery out of it, which can lead to anxiety which in turn can slow the whole laboring process. And even if you happen to run into a complication, you prepare yourself for those possibilities. At least this is what I did, and I feel completely prepared to go into labor and do what I have set out to do.

 

[aliss]

There are 2 reasons I was successful in my unmedicated natural birth. #1- circumstances. A normal healthy labour at a normal healthy gestation. #2- Not being open-minded, for me. I said, I'm not going to do it. And I'm not even going to the hospital because I refuse to get an epidural, it really was that simple for me. I knew I would ask for it if I went there. I know, because I have done it before!

Sometimes being closed-minded about it helps you succeed. Yes, I'm sure some women experience feelings of failure as a result (which IMO tends to fade over time, it's hard to think clearly at the time of the birth and soonafter), but that closed-mindedness also helps those of us who are determined to avoid it

Yes, I was one of those FTMs who said "I'd never do it" and got one at 4cm. But at least I learned a good lesson on how not to get one the 2nd time!

 

[aliss]

I guess I'm not a spiritual type then!! Cause my 'all natural' labor was nowhere near a 'beauriful dance' lol. More power to someone that can have that experience, but good or bad, I'm just happy for my great kids. Seriously, I felt no less an active participant when I had my medicated birth. For me, I was more rested and able to focus and enjoy my baby. To each his own though!

^^^WSS

I also wouldn't be so certain that you definitely won't have one. Because tbh, ftm's have no idea how you will feel at the time, or whether you will be induced (contractions tend to be stronger when induced). Unless you're at a birthing centre or at home where it's not an option. I think it's best to remain open minded. It's easy to say " I won't have this and I won't have that", but truth is you never know how you will feel and how you'll deal with the pain when the time comes.

There is beauty in everything. And a screaming, back to back contraction, blood, sweat, and tears birth is my idea of a beautiful dance, lol. Maybe I just see things differently? It's hard to explain, but there is defiantly beauty in the pain of it all.
.

I do find a sense of beauty in my agongizing back to back home birth, as compared to my sterile hospital birth. It was like running a marathon (sorry, if that seems in poor taste, but it is), the sense of accomplishment cannot be beat. That does not mean another birth does not have accomplishment but gosh darnnit... I am proud of my unmedicated birth and not ashamed to say so. Just because other people don't do it or can't do it or won't do it, doesn't take away from it. And I felt that way for others BEFORE I did it, when "all I had" was an epidural birth under my belt.

 

[Twister]

Sorry I hope I didn't offend anyone with my ftm comment, probably should have worded it a bit better. I didn't mean it to come across as patronising, i'm just going from my own personal experience as I was pretty adamant that an epidural wasn't going to happen (unless absolutely necessary), I also really wanted a water birth but I ended up being induced and didn't at all get the birth I originally wanted.

Of course you can go in with the mindset of not having an epidural, I never said anyone shouldn't. It's just that sometimes things don't always go to plan and it can be difficult to deal with afterwards if you had your heart set on a certain type of birth. What I'm saying is, it's fine to have an idea of what you want, but I also think its important to remember that labour may not go completely to plan, and that things may happen which are beyond your control, to try and avoid any disappointment. Hope that makes sense

 

[summer rain]

I don't have group b strep I was tested for it. With my second eldest there was no medical indication for me having the cannula and my waters hadn't broken yet all they could say was it was 'policy'. The reason they sometimes have the policy of mums who have had many children having the cannula in is to do with being able to easily administer extra doses of syntometrine(sp?) if needed however the royal college of obstetricians did research about a decade ago showing there was no increased risk of bleeding until a mother was on at least her sixth baby and even then if there was no prior history of bleeding the risk wasn't increased by that much. Some midwives and hospital units seem to be following the older policy though xx

That's odd, here unless you tested positive for strep B they don't give you antibiotics. What's syntometrine? Never heard of it. I'm assuming canula is kinda like an IV?

Here they give you IV antibiotics if your waters break 24 hours or more before getting into active labour as a just in case measure. Policies as to how long they will allow you to go vary from hospital to hospital. They don't test routinely for group b strep here so it's a just in case thing (they only tested me and my eldest after he was born not before). Syntometrine is the injection given to expel the placenta quickly and stem any bleeding having it is also known as a managed third stage. A cannula is the tap thing they put in your hand or arm that they can put IV lines into it is very unusual for a UK hospital to put a cannula in for no reason whatsoever especially at a midwife led unit as the one where I had my second eldest was but at 9cm dilated I wasn't in any state to argue. In the end I did need more than one injection of the syntometrine as his placenta weighed 3lb and the site where it was wasn't sealing off properly (they had no indication he was going to be really big nor that this would happen) but the injections they put into the cannula had no more effect than the ones they put into my thigh and I'd imagine they would have taken longer to circulate. So even without the cannula it shouldn't have been a problem xx

 

[AP]

The only time I've ever seen an epidural needle or the like is on OBEM....about a year after I had one I didn't have a clue with my first, to the point I knew nothing about labour and to me it made sense to help me in anyway possible with the "pain" (I can't say it was painful, just tough!

Second time round, I did the whole open mind thing and in the end I only had gas and air-for the stitches, to stop me ripping the poor nurse away from me (i just wanted to be left alone!)

I was quite surprised mid labour realising its a feeling I could handle after all. From a 2lb baby with an epidural you'd think a 6lb baby no epidural would be different but looking back neither were ever painful, just tiring.

I have no idea why people look down on epidurals, if it isn't for them it doesn't effect them and that's it. If you feel it's going to help you, why not?! No one gets a medal.

 

[Feronia]

I'm like aliss in that I went into birth with a pretty closed mind about the whole epidural thing, which is one of the reasons I also chose a homebirth. I think it's totally fine to go into labour knowing what you want, even as a FTM (like I was). When there was talk about transferring me to a hospital and a possible c-section, I said "hell no" and we found alternatives that worked really well, and I ended up getting my home waterbirth. But that's me and I'm exceedingly stubborn! I also knew I wasn't going to take that blasted antibiotics needle for GBS so I didn't even take the GBS test. (You don't ever have to do that -- you always have a choice in the matter!)

Admittedly, I think I would have had a tough time dealing with my birth afterwards if I ended up getting a c-section, but I still think it's okay to know exactly what you want if it helps you achieve it. If I needed a c-section in the long run, I would have at least known that I did everything in my power to have the natural birth I wanted!