I will just keep this short but really need to get this off my chest. My husband did not want any more children after 2nd daughter and although I did, I didn't rock the boat and just got on with it. In january 2010 we applied to the local fostering/adoption agency to become respite carers for children with disabilities. It has been a long slog and this January we moved to another agency as the original one was deadly slow and disorganised. It came to light in July, after a huge amount of training and interviews etc that the agency will stop any respite placement should the foster carers have another birth child - even if the carers, child and family wish to continue. Because my hubby didn't want another baby I didn't give it too much thought, if anything it reinforced the idea that I would not be getting pregnant again. However - we had a genuine oopsie in august followed by a very upsetting ectopic and methotrexate treatment. We didn't tell our social worker as we didn;t see why we should as it didn't change our mind about fostering. However, my husband is now agreeable to having another (last) baby and so I intend to stop using protection next cycle. I want to have a baby but I also want to provide respite care (roughly 1 weekend in 6). Due to my medical background we are likely to be matched with a child with severe disabilities but if we are both keen and the parents are happy - where is the harm? I feel guilty going to the approval panel tomorrow but feel that even if I could give 6 months worth of respite, it would be worth it to the family? Am i right or am I just being deceitful??