Feeling a little blue

[Mrs_G]

Its been a hard day today and i'm feeling a little sad and very tired
My parents came round for Christmas dinner and then we went to visit OH family. I guess i should explain that OH has 2 brothers, both married with a child one has another one on the way. We all live in a small city but his parents never visit us, its very much a case of your not important until you have children, which i no upsets OH alot. After hearing about the chrimble morning with their children and how excited they were, it makes me yearn for my own child so much more I'm not jealous, well maybe i am a little but i don't resent them or anything, just a little sad. His mother is very old fashion and we have already been warned not to even think about children until we're wed.
When i think how much even a budget wedding will cost, all i could think of is what we could be getting for the baby. Don't get me wrong, i want to marry him BUT i don't see why we have to spend so much money feeding people we never ever see or here from
Anyway can't see me getting out of that but it feels better to get it all out!
Hope you all had fantastic days.

 

[Lou]

Hey Mrs G,

Im so sorry to hear you had a bad day today! It sounds like your OH's parents should respect you and your OH a bit more. I know how you feel about getting married first, its extortionate isnt it. At the end of the day, the decision is down to you and your OH, and Im sure they'll adore your babies as much as their other grandchildren. (i hope so anyway!!!) I really hope that you have a better day tomorrow.

On a different topic, i hope you got everything you wanted from santa.

xxxx

 

[Lilaala]

That's rotten, I'm sorry.

Hubby and I eloped, and I'd do it again. It's affordable, romantic, and it's virtually stress-free. We then had a close friends and family Potluck by the beach to celebrate, it was beautiful and again, affordable. Maybe something like that would work for the two of you.

Either way, just remember it's impossible to please everyone, so when it comes down to it you need to do things the way they feel right to you and your spouse, because in the end you'll be the ones going through it.

I wish you all the best (and Happy Holidays as well!)

 

[Bubby]

Weddings don't have to be expensive if you don't mention the W word. I've saved a fortune by getting quotes for "celebration cakes" instead of Wedding cakes. We're having a simple registry office service for close family only, followed by lunch at a local restaurant. I don't want any bridesmaids so that saves a fortune and I'm just getting an off-the-peg debenhams/house of fraser dress rather than spending £1000 on one I'll only wear once anyway!

Weddings can be expensive but only if thats what you want. If you invite 100 guests or want to splash out on a Vera Wang then of course it will be pricey but if you just want to celebrate the love you have for your oh then it can be much cheaper.

Something most people seem to forget is that a wedding is the first day of the rest of your life. Enjoy it for the symbol that it is and never let the whole "party" thing get out of hand and forget the real purpose and meaning of a wedding - a celebration of love and the beginning of something special.

 

[Mrs_G]

Thanks Everyone, i'm feeling a little better today but preparing myself for another afternoon round his mothers house there best be booze there
Bubby that is my dream day, we are getting married in a registry office but unfortunatly OH wants everyone he's ever met there and at the reception. Its all a bit over whelming for me i don't think there is a way for us to both get what we want

 

[lauraloo24]

Thanks Everyone, i'm feeling a little better today but preparing myself for another afternoon round his mothers house there best be booze there
Bubby that is my dream day, we are getting married in a registry office but unfortunatly OH wants everyone he's ever met there and at the reception. Its all a bit over whelming for me i don't think there is a way for us to both get what we want

It was the other way round for me and the OH, he didnt want hardly anyone at our reception, whereas I wanted to invite quite a few ppl. In the end we compromised & had a nice meal straight after the service for close family & friends & then an evening do for everyone else, which was just a buffet really. Our whole wedding was really quite cheap actually, and we just went to Cornwall for a week for our honeymoon. Wedding days dont have to be expensive, we wanted to spend our money on things for the house.
Anyway hope you reach some sort of compromise & that you get your honeymoon !! xx

 

[Caroline]

My work colleague has just gone off with her oh & got married @ gretna green.

I can understand in many ways ppl wanting to invite everyman & his dog, as its a special day & you want to share it with as many ppl as posssible, but the most important thing is what the day symbolises.

I would maybe suggest, a small ceremony & sit down meal for very close family & friends, followed by a disco @ night. DO you maybe know someone who could DJ for you, that could be there gift to you?

Have a bar, but say provide 1st drink only.

At the end of the day you only get married the once (in theory) so you want it to be special to you.

As far as being married b4 having kids, well that is entirely upto you & nothing at all to do with anyone else.

OH & I were married 1st, but if any of my kids weren't married I wouldn't give a stuff.

Your prospective MIL sounds a bit of a mare
Wisiing you a happy & prosperous New Year, that brings you everything you wish for.

 

[cazd]

Hey you... I'm bubbling with great news but I've just seen your post so I'll give you a hug first!!!


YOU and your Man are the important people - make sure that you both get what you want out of your wedding and don't let anyone say otherwise!

We went to vegas and left everyone behind - it was perfect for us but I'm sure you'll find your balance too. Just make sure that your voice is heard or you might end up regretting it..

Christmas is hell when you so desperately want children - but at least there's light at the end of the tunnel.

Good luck with everything xxxx

 

[Dream.A.Dream]

Try and explain to OH it's about compromise, maybe less at the ceremony and then invite whoever to a party afterwards? Sorry you were feeling so down xx