Feeling hopeless...

[MrsVan]

Hey everyone,

I am new to this forum so let me start with a bit of a background. I am a healthy 30 year old woman ttc #1 with hubby who is a healthy 32 year old man. We have been trying since January of this year, which means 9 months have passed with no success. I've finally gotten a good handle on the length of my cycles, estimated ovulation times etc and last month was a really good month, timing wise. Sure enough, I woke up this morning with AF right on time. I guess I am here to just get my frustrations out and find some support through women who understand where I am coming from. I am so desperate to get pregnant that it has literally taken over my life and I hate this feeling of obsession. It is such a let down every month and its getting harder and harder to deal with the feelings of sadness. I know its fairly normal for this to take up to a year but I really didn't anticipate it taking this long. I feel like a horrible person when I hear the news of a friend who just became pregnant/had a baby and my first reaction is sadness and jealousy Anyways, that is my rant. Wish me luck for next month. Any tips/advice for ttc or dealing with the upset of yet another unsuccessful month are welcome!

 

[Prayingforno1]

I know I for sure never thought I'd still be waiting for my BFP. I know how upsetting seeing AF can be each month but I want you to be encouraged that your are closer to your BFP than you know. Keep at it hun it will be worth it in the end

 

[sunnydee]

I know exactly how you feel! We are now at the 1 year mark, I didn't want to get obsessed over TTC so I avoided OPK and temping all year.
This month I went all out, temps were good, tried all the tricks like pineapple core, Brazil nuts, green tea! Well af arrived yesterday and I thought I would be as devastated as I have been every month but I actually feel a lot more hopeful now? I read something yesterday that made me feel better, not to put your life on hold while TTC. Book a holiday or start a project/hobby! Something to take your mind off it might help

 

[JohnsPrincess]

Awe hon...I know how you feel! It took us about 6 years, with one loss, to get pg with our son! I thought it would never happen...but it Did...and it will for you too!

 

[BabyshoesS]

I was experiencing the same feelings and uncertainties that you are. I decided to, after 9 months, go to a fertility specialist. They explained to us that my husband is infertile and that he has to under go a number of treatments. If nothing helps ICSI is our only option. Although it's not good news I know I'm only getting one step closer to holding my baby in my arms. Do yourself a favour and seek help

 

[cutestuff]

Hi. I am in the same boat almost exactly. I am turning 30 in about a month and my husband is 32. As far as I am aware, we are both healthy but we lack money and health insurance to really find out. I am trying to stay hopeful and trust that when the time is right, I will have my BFP. We decided to start trying for our 4 year anniversary which was this last June, but we have been together for 11.5 years. You would think that there would have been possibly one mistake in there somewhere, but no, we are apparently super responsible and sometimes that sucks.....but the best of luck to you and I hope you get a BFP soon.

 

[KayeChay]

I get what you mean, when I hear a friend or a coworker get pregnant I can't help but roll my eyes! I'm so so jealous! Some people (I know I shouldn't judge) shouldn't have kids. Don't ever listen to people that says "when the time is right" because that's a load of bull. I KNOW the time is right for us, so where's our baby?

The thing with me is that I have very irregular periods. The last time I had a period (because of birth control) was 320 days ago! I'm actually going to the doctors in 20 minutes to figure out what's going on and such. I really hope that I do have answers today.

 

[KatO79]

I'm 35 and my DH is 37 and we've been TTC for a little over 1 year now. I've tried lots of different things myself including temping, OPKs, CBFM and now this was my first try with Conceive Plus but nada, AF came today

I know that feeling of disappointment every month and have sometimes even felt like throwing in the towel. But i somehow manage to get more positive as my O day approaches each month and can't resist trying each time, hoping it'll happen. But despite good timing each and every month, I've been through 14 cycles (on #15, CD1 now) with nothing to show for it. The only thing keeping me going is that we'll be having our 1st appointment with the fertility clinic in 2 weeks and will start treatment as soon as I've had an HSG after that meeting.

Maybe you could consider going to your GP and getting both you and your DH checked?

Unfortunately no other advice as I'm going through the same thing but just a whole lot of sympathy I hope we both soon get our BFPs

 

[zoeh]

I know those feelings all too well. I came off the pill two years ago and have had two "periods" on my own since, both of which where anovulatory cycles. I always had periods once every 5-6 months even before the pill. Fast forward a year from when I started actual fertility treatments, I had three people in my family get pregnant within 3 months of each other; one by accident on the pill, one after less than 6 months off the pill. The only one I can really be around without feeling like a failure is my friend (I just call her family) who got pregnant after 3 difficult years of trying. I felt like I could genuinely be happy for her. But the others... especially the one who is younger than I who has been married for half the time I have... it's hard feeling like you ought to be happy for people but are only capable of feeling jealous and insecure.

 

[deafgal01]

Well, when AF comes, I get my wine. If I need to, I let myself cry one way or another.

After waiting for so damn long and the results I got regarding the issues, I kinda let it go- I drink wine whenever I want to as long it doesn't conflict with my work schedule. As for people getting knocked up left and right, I congrats them with a fake smile most of the time and be on my merry way. If it's on facebook, I simply "un-follow" their facebook posts so I'm not seeing all the damn status about being pregnant or announcing.